"FCKIN IN LOVE" - Fefe Dobson

A wet tongue greeted me when I woke. Not Baker's, but Wolf.

I cracked a smile at the thought, my eyelids protesting as I made to open them. Baker's canine friend greeted me, impatiently pawing the edge of the bed—needing out.

What time was it?

I reached for my phone, finding it next to Baker's on the nightstand.

6:45 am.

I rubbed the side of my face. The boys needed to get down to the track to prepare for today's race, and I needed to wash my hair before we left.

Last night's events played in my mind, coaxing a wry side smile. Gently I twisted, maneuvering under Baker's heavy arm to face him—his chest firm against mine.

Still sleeping.

Good. He needed it. The opening race was today, and I wasn't sure how he felt about it. Or how I thought about the prospect of watching him.

Dark lashes rested on the delicate skin beneath his eyes—his tattooed arm curled around me and out of the blanket.

I ran my fingers along the ink, following every swirling line and crevice of muscle only to stop just before the scar on his shoulder.

My throat tightened. I didn't even think to search for it last night.

Plum-coloured lines ran jagged between whorls of ink. In his last race, Baker had shattered his collarbone and endured a few fractured ribs that punctured his lungs, not to mention the multiple fractured vertebrae and the broken hip.

My eyes watered as the images flashed through my mind. When I screamed and cried and prayed for a miracle. When I begged his late mother to send him back to me.

I remembered the litre of blood they drained from his lungs, the two tubes they inserted to reinflate the one that collapsed and the blood transfusion he later needed.

I ran a finger along his dark brow, then along the bridge of his straight nose.

I remembered sitting through the surgeries with Luke and Nate and feeling the overwhelming need to comfort a distraught Johnny, but for the life of me, I couldn't. I could hardly keep it together for myself, let alone anyone else.

It was like wading through dark waters—unable to see anything ahead thanks to the mists of uncertainty clouding my view.

I didn't know what I would've done if he didn't wake, and I didn't want to think about it.

The moment Baker woke was the happiest day of my life, and as grateful as I was, I wasn't prepared for the sullen days that followed.

Take-out boxes popped in my head. The phantom smell of Chinese food from a local place in town lining my nose. They littered the coffee table in the living room while the latest race played on the flatscreen.

I remember glancing at Baker from time to time, gauging his reaction. He wasn't always there, and if he was, he wasn't Baker. He was someone else entirely—someone I didn't recognize.

Worry pricked. I didn't know how he'd react today if Hunt provoked him or what he might do if that temper got the better of him.

I couldn't lose Baker again. Not to the track. Or grief. Or to the empty bottles that drove me to leave.

No, I told myself. Baker was here. He was different and he was trying.

I kissed his lips, needing to get to the house before anyone realized that I was gone.

I slipped quietly out of his grip, hardly jostling him as Wolf jumped—nails clicking on the cold hardwood beneath my feet.

"Yes," I whispered, throwing on my shirt, "we're going."

I quickly dressed, took Wolf out and made my way to the house before Baker woke.

△

I closed the glass door to the kitchen as quietly as possible, about to remove my boots and sneak upstairs before an amused voice greeted me.

"Morning, sunshine."

My stomach flopped at the sound of my roommate's voice, and my head snapped.

Janelle smirked from the table, holding a spoon before her mouth, next to Austin, who seemed to be more concerned about the waffles and bacon he was currently shovelling in his mouth.

"You're early," I breathed, greeting him as casually as possible.

"And you're late," Janelle teased.

I stood frozen, pinned under her gaze.

My hair was a mess, my clothes rumpled and out of place.

She knew. So did Austin if the knowing, shit-eating grin and side-eye he gave said anything.

I wrangled for an explanation. There was none. Baker and I slept together, had opened the vault of vulnerability and expressed the feelings we tried suppressing for one another. And there was no going back.

Janelle's green eyes flicked down, and she said, "Your skirts on backwards, Hadley."

My head dropped. Oh god, she was right. "Where's mom?" I asked in a moment of mortification, wrestling with the damn thing before she came popping out of nowhere. The last thing I wanted was to explain my situationship to my mother.

Austin and Janelle burst—chuckling at my expense. "Aren't you a little old to be sneaking around?" Austin asked, easing back in his chair and cocking a brow.

I snarled. "Aren't you a little old for juice boxes?"

They clinked their cardboard boxes together like they were made of fine crystal. A good show of unity. "You're never too old for juice boxes."

I glowered.

"Your mom went to the grounds," Janelle answered after a bout of silence. "You're safe."

I rolled my eyes, about to flee when Nate came around the corner—tugging a shirt over his torso. "Did you just get in?" he asked, scrutinizing me with a puzzled brow and noting the same clothes I wore yesterday with a quick glance.

Yes, did I need to shout it from the rooftops?

He passed me on socked feet, making his way, not to the counter and the food my mother left, but the table.

I might have provided an answer had the sight of the hoodie Janelle wore not caught my attention. Nate's—black oversized with a red fox outline on the front and his name and number stitched on the back.

It rendered me speechless, and my brows twitched a slight—my question conveyed clearly.

A coy smile twitched at the corner of her mouth, and she averted—breaking our gaze.

Did they...?

I might have finished that thought had Nate not squinted out the window—one hand pressed atop the table before Janelle's bowl of fruit and yogurt, the other on the back of her chair. "Wait," he grinned, gazing past Janelle's dark head through the wood blinds and out the window to the guest house. "Were you with Baker?"

"No."

The three of them erupted in a fit of laughter that had my cheeks blazing.

Whatever, they were bound to find out sooner or later.

"I knew it," Nate said, a smile broad across his face.

I sagged, hating my brother. "Knew what?"

"That you and Baker would get back together."

That made one of us.

"Is it official?" Austin asked, taking a turn to rub in the humiliation.

"No." Yes? I didn't know. I had to go back to school, and Baker would be busy with this year's racing circuit. But what we said, what we promised each other...

Maybe a bit of distance would be good for us, I told myself. Then we could ease into things instead of picking up where we left off. We still had a lot to work through, but I wanted Baker in my life, and I was willing to do whatever it took.

Their knowing grins had me wanting to die. Thankfully the garage door opened and out popped Luke. "Did you just get in?" he asked, appearing around the corner.

And my hopes of a rescue diminished.

"She did," Nate said through a mouthful—finishing off what was left of Janelle's fruit and yogurt. "But she wasn't far."

I expected Luke to laugh along with the others. He didn't. And the amusement playing there had vanished entirely at the sight of the hoodie an oblivious Janelle wore.

I couldn't explain the pain that punctured my chest as he observed.

"Did you get those sleds on the rack?" Nate asked, hovering just above Janelle.

The others quieted, and Luke blinked, hiding whatever pain he was trying to conceal. It gutted me. Baker told me he suspected Luke had a thing for Janelle, but it would seem she made her choice if the sweater was any indication.

My heart wilted like a flower petal. Luke hadn't been with anyone since Alyssa. Not since their peaceful parting when Alyssa expressed her true feelings about her conflicting emotions for him and the girl she'd fallen for.

Luke had handled the news admirably, and I admired him for it, but Nate...

I'd never seen him so happy, and if I was being honest, I hadn't seen Janelle glow like that since Dick.

Luke might have answered had Austin not said, "That's my job."

The burly mechanic rinsed his plate and added it to the collection of unwashed dishes in the dishwasher before retrieving his hat from the table. "We could've had something special, Hadley," he teased, covering the top of his raven-coloured head.

Despite myself, I cracked a wide smile. "Go wake, Baker."

"That's your job, isn't it?"

I playfully shoved the mechanic as he made his way by and retreated upstairs to shower.

A/N: Race Day!! Who else is nervous?

Side note: This is Austin minus the beard and his sled. No one can tell me otherwise 😂💛