A broad smile stretched across my face as I beheld Austin, our mechanic and oldest friend, wiping oil and grime from his hands.

He stood on the threshold of the garage. His hefty shoulders were broad beneath the black and white fox hoodie, matching the profit cap he sported backwards, hiding jet black hair.

Austin wasn't short, but he wasn't as tall as me either. And while he and Hadley's moms came from the same ethnic background, he wasn't as light as her. Hadley and her brothers tipped fairer on the scale of gold, while Austin's skin was more akin to the earth and losing the slight tinge of red the summer's rays coaxed from it.

He jabbed his chin at me as I rose. "How was the ride?"

I shrugged, "Same as always."

A playful spark lit behind his brown eyes as I made my way into the garage. "Finally had a taste of your own medicine."

My smile fell to a frown.

"I heard all about it," he beamed, making his way to the fridge along the wall, grabbing himself a beer and me a water. "How you lost your shit and threw Hadley over your shoulder cause she was wobbling across the bar like a baby fawn."

I clenched my jaw as he offered the drink, sneering down at him.

It didn't phase him. It never phased him. "Luke said you lost it on her boyfriend."

I eyed Luke, whose shoulders seemed to slump as he passed me, then Nate, who matched my rage, not for his brother, but the boyfriend.

Nate had already discarded his coat and sat on the leather seat of his sled—one arm propped on a knee, beer in hand.

"Not exactly," I replied as I fell onto the sofa adjacent to the fridge and took a thought-filled sip.

I wanted to, and I might have had Nate not snatched Hadley's phone when I reached over the seat to grab it.

Who the fuck is Baker? He demanded when Hadley answered his call after she ass dialled him three or four times.

None of his damn business, I snipped over my shoulder as she fumbled for words to explain. Clearly, she'd never mentioned me to him either.

The tone he threw had my blood boiling, but it was the tears that fell from her eyes as she gazed out the window that had my heart bleeding.

I fucking hated her boyfriend for making her feel that way. And if I ever saw him—

I sat forward, my gaze contemplative as realization struck.

I'd made her feel that way.

It was like a punch to the gut. Like I'd been thrown from my sled again and crushed under the weight of another.

I hardly noticed the teeth grating sound Luke's chair made against the concrete floor as he slid it over. Or the underwater words Austin was mumbling.

I couldn't move from those thoughts. I was submerged in an ocean of memory and guilt. Frozen beneath the ice and my fucking reflection was peering back at me like the god damn ghost of Christmas past. All I could hear was the bone-shattering words I'd uttered. I'd been just as bad as that prick, Dallas. Fuck.

"I remember—"

My gaze snapped up, finding Austin seated on the low stool before Johnny's bike, examining all the tools, bolts, and nuts on his equally measured tool table next to him.

"—Hadley dragging your pathetic ass across the lawn to the guest house nearly every night. I'd watch her get out of the truck and haul you by herself while these assholes slept in the back seat."

The boys' spirits seemed to dim as Austin coaxed their shame.

He wasn't wrong. The twins would usually accompany me during one of my tirades. Sometimes they'd help Hadley drag me home, and other times they'd sit and drink with me while I wallowed. Guilty, perhaps for not doing more for me on the track that day.

Austin's gaze pierced my own. "Do you know how tiny that girl is compared to you?"

"What's your point?" I asked, not about to let up.

His condescending tone was pissing me off. I knew what I'd done to her, and I didn't need him reminding me.

"I'm just stating a fact," he replied, a little too casually for my liking. "After the shit you took that girl through, you have no right to snap at her boyfriend when you were just as bad. And you sure as hell have no right be mad about hauling her ass home. You endured one night. How many has she dealt with, Baker? Between you and her brothers."

Disappointment peppered his words, but as always, Austin kept his cool, playing peacemaker in his own sick, sadistic way.

I didn't answer. I knew, but Austin went on. "She carried you when everyone else had given up, and you have the balls to be mad at her and don't say you're not—" Pointing a screwdriver at me before I could speak. "—I know you. You need to get off your high horse and stop your bitching. Be grateful you have someone like Hadley."

"Had," I quietly corrected, but Austin didn't miss a beat.

"And whose fault is that?" he snapped back. "I watched Hadley cry outside your door nearly every morning. I watched her fight with you every time you whined about going to physical therapy."

The ire burned, but he wasn't finished.

"You were a prick, and you're pissed because you had to haul her home one time? Because she loosened up a little? Fuck Baker, if that girl wanted to dance around town bare ass in the back of my truck, I'd insert a pole."

I tried to hold down the grin, knowing he would. But I wasn't mad because she'd gone out. That shit never bothered me. I was mad at the way she made me feel. Like I was some sort of criminal.

Every word—no matter how true was like a slap in the face. A reminder of who I was when she left, not the man I was trying to be.

Maybe that's what she assumed, that I was still that same guy she needed to protect from ruining—not only my career but my life.

I might have thought on it had Austin not gone on, solidifying my point. "If I wasn't paid to be around you at the time, I wouldn't have been. I would've left with Hadley."

I gave him a look, one hinted with a smile. "You would, wouldn't you."

"Man, if that girl came to me today and said, 'Austin, it was always you,' you bet your ass I'd go. Fuck our friendship. Fuck my job. I'd be hers."

I laughed at his terrible impersonation of Hadley.

"Seriously though, bro. Have you seen Hadley Bell? That girl grew into her own."

That she did, I thought, catching Luke's grimace in the corner of my eye. "Too bad you missed your shot."

"Dallas didn't."

I stilled.

"What?" he shrugged. "I hear everything. Apparently, her boyfriend is pissed." Going back to the bike. "I wouldn't be surprised if they broke up. He's a dick."

"And how the hell do you know that?"

He smiled under his meaty arm. "The roommate. I overheard her talking on the phone when she let Wolf out."

Nate shook his head. "Fuck Austin, you really do hear everything."

"That I do," he smiled. Then went on, addressing me. "I think it's unfair to expect so much of Hadley after everything she did for you. She went through hell after your accident. You didn't see, but we did." Gesturing to the twins with another tool.

Their eyes shadowed as they'd fallen into the same memory.

"You should talk to her," Austin finished. "She feels pretty shitty."

"Did Janelle say that too?" I asked, not sure how I felt about the roommate yet.

"No," he replied, grabbing his oil-stained rag. "She did."

I held his gaze for a moment, but he revealed nothing else.

I sighed. I knew I had to talk to Hadley. To apologize the way I wanted when I flew out to the city to see her for her birthday, but it didn't work out the way I wanted.

I finished my water and left the garage, whistling for Wolf, who appeared around the corner of the house. I needed a shower and to think about what I was going to say.

I had no idea what would happen or if she'd forgive me, but I refused to be like that piece of shit boyfriend of hers.

If we were going to move on, we would have to talk. Hadley was only home for a few short weeks so it needed to be soon. And it needed to start with me.

A/N: This chapter was nearly 3k words so I divided them into two for convenience.

A lot's happened so far. The twins have a thing for Janelle, we met Baker's dog that we'll see more of in future chapters, Austin the mechanic showed up laying down some serious truth, and Baker drew some startling realizations about himself.

I didn't realize how heavy the feels would be in the beginning, but it wouldn't be my book if it didn't lol.

Thank you for reading ❤️