Bonus chapter!

11. Always makes sure you won't die of Halloween

"Are you sure this food is safe?"

Snotlout eyed the spread on the table cautiously and to his credit, Hiccup-dressed up as the Devil with neat red horns and a surprisingly perky tail-didn't take offence.

"It is this year," he admitted. "Astrid and I had a talk after we had a long argument with the insurance company before we had to move apartments. And she has agreed never to cook for anyone else again. We got caterers in."

"Oh, thank Thor!" Snotlout said, then pushed Hiccup aside and descended on the buffet table like a starving man. Shaking his head and sighing, Hiccup grabbed a cup of punch and walked to stand by Astrid, who was the most beautiful ghost he had ever seen. Eschewing the traditional sheet-since that had worked so well in the past-she had gone for deadpan white makeup and deep purple smudges under her sky blue eyes and some talc in her hair, while wearing a loose white top and long white skirt and she had even gone barefoot, leaving her boots in the bedroom. He pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"You are the most gorgeous ghost I have ever seen, Milady," he murmured. She smiled and snuggled against his lean shape, wrapped in skinny black dress trousers, a white dress shirt and black tuxedo.

"And you look exceptionally hot in a suit, Babe," she complimented him.

"Exactly the effect a Devil would aim for," he smirked and chuckled. "Dagur looks good."

"Yes, the Zombie look is really working for him," Astrid commented. "And the green skin really brings out his hair."

"Mala is looking really good as a mad scientist," Hiccup commented. "She seems to be settling in now she's recovered from your cooking and she and Dagur are very sweet together."

"Wedding bells next year?" Astrid asked.

"Wouldn't be surprised," Hiccup said with a small smile.

"You know something!" she accused him.

"I promised not to say anything," he told her honestly and she subsided. Hiccup was a decent, honourable and trustworthy man and if he gave his word, he always kept it.

"Just one of the things I love about you," she admitted. "Fishlegs makes a great Frankenstein's monster, doesn't he?"

"He's really enjoying it," Hiccup admitted. "I helped him make the bolts for his neck. Heather is a very sexy werewolf, isn't she?" Astrid chuckled.

"Eyes front, Mister!" she said without rancour, having no concern about her boyfriend's affections. "Another set of wedding bells?"

"I may need to invest in a new suit," Hiccup admitted.

"SON!" The unmistakable brogue of Stoick Haddock, Mayor of Berk and Hiccup's father, echoed through the room. Six feet ten, four hundred pounds and topped with flaming hair and a grey-streaked beard you could easily lose a badger in, Stoick had come dressed in full Viking Chief regalia. His answer when challenged that this was a Halloweeen party was 'did you see what those guys got up to? Very scary indeed!'

"Hey, Dad!" Hiccup smiled, his eyes twinkling. Stoick didn't get out as much as he should, exhausted by the duties of mayor and though he had his friend Gobber for company, Hiccup was constantly worried he wasn't spending enough time with his father. "Enjoying the party?"

The mayor looked around the room, decorated with bat bunting, hollowed out pumpkins and little ghosts over the doors. The lights were down and the ghosts glowed an eerie green. Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' was playing over the sound system. "You've done an excellent job, son," he said. "It's a fine party and I'm grateful you thought of me. Are you sure your friends don't mind?"

"If they do, they aren't our friends," Astrid told him bluntly. "You are family-and Gobber."

"And Sven?" Stoick asked with a raised eyebrow.

"He's very lonely," Hiccup said. "His uncles all live on Hysteria Isle and his daughter Dagny-Jo moved to the mainland ten years ago and never visits. So we asked him."

"And Bucket and Mulch?"

"We work with them in the Dragon Shelter," Hiccup added.

"Gustav?"

"Look, he's a loser like the rest of us," Astrid told him. "More specifically, he's a friend and loyal to boot. And he's started working at Hiccup's engineering firm. So we asked him. He brought some pumpkin muffins that I hid in the kitchen to spare his feelings."

"I'm not sure they are pumpkin," a new voice said. Ruffnut and Tuffnut arrived, wearing identical brown pinstriped suits and fangs. Tuffnut was eyeing one of the muffins suspiciously.

"Vampires?" Stoick guessed, sipping his pumpkin juice.

"Or demons-because they can look like anything if they choose," Ruffnut added. "I think my brother is right. This isn't a pumpkin muffin."

"Then what is it?" Astrid asked. Her eyes drifted to the buffet table where Snotlout had given up loading his plate and was just eating straight from the salvers. To her shock, there was a plate of muffins prominently displayed. "What the...? How did they get there?"

"Gustav found them and put them back out," Ruffnut said helpfully.

"It looks like beetroot, parsnip and walnut," Tuffnut decided.

"Beetroot?" Astrid demanded.

"Parsnip?" Hiccup echoed.

"Walnut?" Stoick added, his voice concerned.

"Where's Gustav?" Astrid snapped. The twins pointed to the kitchen, where a rather skinny and awkward mummy was trying to chat up Heather. The group headed to the kitchen to hear a really unsuccessful attempt at flirting.

"...you could always come and check out my sarcophagus. It's big enough for two..." Gustav tried, waggling his eyebrows. Heather looked unimpressed.

"I'm supposedly an overgrown puppy," she told him. "I could unravel you in a second."

"It's a risk I'm willing to take...Babe..." he attempted. She threw her pumpkin punch at him and he smiled, dripping the orange liquid. "That's a maybe, then?"

"Gustav!" Astrid growled as she walked into the kitchen. "You remember when we said no unauthorised food, only drink?" The young man grinned.

"Uhm...sorry...but in my defence, no one in Berk will sell me any alcohol because they all think I'm still underage," Gustav said. "Even the fake moustache didn't convince them."

"What about your ID?" Hiccup asked. Gustav blushed.

"They thought it was fake," he said, embarrassed. "So I made my Tante Borghilde's Pumpkin muffins. Except they had run out of pumpkins so I used some potato, parsnip, beetroot and walnut instead."

"Why?" Astrid was frowning.

"Because Tante Borghilde always said that any root vegetable could be made into a muffin," he said defensively.

"But not all at the same time," Stoick commented with a roll of the eyes.

"You know why we asked no one to bring food?" Hiccup asked the juice-stained Mummy.

"You already had caterers?" Gustav asked. Hiccup shook his head.

"Allergies," he said. "Caterers or cooking ourselves mean we can control what goes into the food."

"Who has allergies?" Gustav asked.

"SNOTLOUT!" Hiccup, Astrid and Stoick all said simultaneously. And then they shared a look and stampeded for the buffet table... Of course, with Stoick being there, they all wedged into the doorframe, meaning they were helpless to stop the completely oblivious Snotlout grabbing a muffin and scoffing it in almost one gulp. He paused, frowned, looked at it suspiciously...then promptly ate another.

"For the love of..." Hiccup growled, struggling to free himself. "He really does have the survival instinct of a lemming..."

"Snotlout! Stop eating those muffins!" Astrid yelled, twisting desperately to get free. Ruffnut tried to squirm through their legs and only succeeded in getting wedged as well. Frowning, Snotlout looked up.

"Why? You said you had caterers! Don't tell me you made these?" he protested, biting into hsi third.

"What? No!" Astrid protested. "Gustav made them."

"Oh? They're okay considering," Snotlout said, swallowing his third and grabbing a fourth.

"They contain beetroot!" Hiccup yelled.

"And parsnip!" Astrid added.

"And walnuts!" Stoick added.

"What? But I'm deathly allergic to all of those!" Snotlout protested, finishing his fourth muffin.

"STOP EATING!!!!" Hiccup yelled as Tuffnut gave a scream and flung himself at the jam of people in the doorway. There was a creak and they all shot forward and landed in a heap. Hiccup was waving an arm feebly-the only part of him visible, for he was at the bottom, under his enormous father. "Air!" he croaked.

"I'm feeling a bith thtrange..." Snotlout lisped. "My lipth are burning..."

"Heather-can you call an ambulance?" Astrid asked, joining Ruffnut and Tuffnut in trying the pull Stoick off of the squashed Hiccup.

"Oh oh oh!" Tuffnut said excitedly. "Can I stab Snotlout in the heart with a syringe?"

"What?" Astrid asked, checking Hiccup was returning to a more normal pink colour, now he was able to breathe again.

"Well, when that woman in the movies..." Tuffnut began.

"And you do use adrenaline to treat allergic reactions," Ruffnut added, her eyes gleaming hopefully.

"We don't have any adrenaline," Astrid said.

"I've got a syringe of foot medication," Gustav offered.

"No," Hiccup said, shaking his head.

"My lipth are thwollen," Snotlout frowned, trying to pull his tongue out far enough to inspect for himself. "And I am feeling a bit thrange..."

"Oh dear...Snotlout, your entire face has turned red and swollen to twice the normal size," Heather commented. Dagur burst out laughing.

"Oh Thor, I am going to have to call you Snotlips from now on!" he exclaimed.

"Not thair..." Snotlout pouted.

"Ambulance is on the way," Fishlegs reported. "Oh dear-does anyone know CPR?"

"I'm not going to die!" Snotlout lisped, wheezing. "And I am going to kill Guthtav when I get my handth on him!"

"I didn't know you were allergic to normal foods!" Gustav protested. Mala sighed and pulled a slim box from her pocket, then grabbed Snotlout and slammed the injection into his ass.

"OWWW!" he yelped.

"Adrenaline...dragon dose," she said. "I always carry some around in case a dragon has an allergic reaction..."

"Oh...will his heart explode now?" Tuffnut asked hopefully.

"Please-because that would be awesome!" Ruffnut added.

"Oh Thor," Stoick groaned as the sounds of sirens grew closer. "Would it be possible for there to be any celebration in Berk where the emergency services don't attend?"

"Hey! My lipth aren't tingling tho muth!" Snotlout announced as he reached for another muffin Dagur, Fishlegs and Heather jumped on him and wrestled the offending baked item from his hands.

"His hands are swollen from touching them!" Heather exclaimed. "Is he really this stupid?"

"Am not thupid!" Snotlout protested.

"Yes, you are," Hiccup said, letting the paramedics in. "But you're our idiot and we don't want you or anyone to die of Halloween." He looked over to Astrid who took over and explained everything to the paramedics as Hiccup carefully removed the offending muffins. Still protesting as he was forced onto a stretcher and carried out of the apartment, Snotlout grabbed a salver of mini-burgers and hotdogs.

"For later," he lisped as he was wheeled out. Stoick chuckled.

"He'll be fine," he said. "Spitelout tells me he's had more allergic reactions than I've had hot dinners. He's hopeless at remembering he's supposed to be allergic to various things." Then he raised his glass. "Well done, everybody. Happy Halloween!"

Gustav's phone rang and the young man answered it. He looked up in shock.

"It's Snotlout," he reported to everyone who was looking at him. "He wants the recipe for the muffins."

The End (definitely).

A/N 4:

(Vala hands Porg some Rose)

(Porg proceeds to gobble it up and then bounce around the room merrily)

Harry: "NOOOOOO! HE NEEDS TO SLEEP TONIGHT!"

Vala: Hee hee