Levi: what's for lunch?

Eren: Umm...spicy wings

Levi: -__- *grabs 2 wings and eats them*

Jean: *arrives* hey, I just got he- oh...Eren's here...

Eren: *whispers at Jean's ear OTP OTP OTP OTP

Jean: are you gonna do this all day?

*a giant fart suddenly happens*

Connie: what was that?

Sasha: don't pretend that wasn't you

Connie: it wasn't, I swear

Sasha: *sniffs at Connie* nope,wasn't you.

Levi: *sniff* oh...excuse me...*rushes to his room

*at Levi's room...*

Levi: dammit! I didn't fart, I actually took a sh*t back there. Hmm...

*Levi grabs cleaning spray*

Levi: hehe...no one will EVER know...

*a few minutes later...*

Levi: Eh, the stain's still there. No matter, I'll clean this after lunch *places pants and underwear in the bed* Right now I have to wash these filthy hands of mine...and change,too...

*back at the dining table...*

Eren: Umm...Corporal? Why are you wearing shorts?

Levi: what's wrong with it?

Jean: no, nothing's wrong with it, relly. It's just...you were wearing white pants a while ago and...

Levi: I changed it, this was the only pair that was clean. I had to replace it cause... white pants get "filthy" easily

Eren: oh...

Jean: that's smart, but really? Shorts were the only ones that cleaned quicker than the others.

Levi: cause, Erwin uses most of my pants to dry wet horses.

Jean: oh, those were your pants?

Levi: yup, now let's just get this over with and ea-

Petra: Captain, can I borrow a mop?

Levi: oh...*grabs broom* here

Petra:thanks *leaves

Levi: what did she need that for?

Eren: don't you remember,sir? You assigned me to clean your room, but then she volunteered to do it instead.

Levi: SH*T *runs away

*at Levi's bedroom...*

Levi: *breaks door down

Petra: C-Captain...what's this?

Levi: *blushes* Uhh...I...uhh..

Petra: don't worry, your secret's safe with me. Right now I have to get these things washed, and...this door fixed...I'll call the army, now...

Levi: I'll come with you...now let's go...*mind speaking Dammit,Levi. You blew it today...BLEW IT...