By the time I get home Brendon had already been taken to the hospital. The police officers are still there. They start questioning me. "What happened today that caused him to do this? You guys are married? Is he usually like this? Has he been drinking tonight? Where did he get the pills from?" They ask.

"His family hates him because he's pansexual and are refusing to come to our wedding. Yes. We got engaged on Christmas. No, I mean he was suicidal about four years ago. Yes. What do you mean pills? What pills?"

"Brendon had Xanax in his system," the officer says. "I don't know how or where he got that?" I admit. What did you do Brendon? I'm so scared for Brendon. I'm so stupid. I should have been there for him. I shouldn't have gone to Ryan's house today.

I ask the officer what hospital he was sent to then get in my car and drive to it. When I get there I stop at the front desk and ask for Brendon Urie. "What's your relation to him?" The lady at the desk asks. I think her name tag says Kala. "I'm his fiancé," I tell her. "Okay well I'll tell the nurses you're here. For now just wait in the waiting room."

I end up having to sit and wait for hours. Approximately seven hours. My heart is racing. No one has come to update me on Brendon's condition. I pull out my phone so I can let someone know what happened to Brendon.

DallonWeekes: something bad has happened

ZackHall: what?

DallonWeekes: Brendon is I the hospital

ZackHall: what happened!

DallonWeekes: he cut himself and was drinking and I think he might have overdosed

ZackHall: what hospital are you at?

I text Zack the address to the hospital then put my phone back in my pocket. "Brendon Urie?" Someone says. I look up and see a doctor standing in the room. I walk over to him. "Yes?" I ask. "Are you his fiancé?" "Yes." "Brendon had to have his stomach pumped and was given 42 stitches."

42 stitches. My heart breaks hearing that. "C-Can I see him?" He nods his head. I follow him down the hallway to Brendon's room. Before I go in he tells me, "he's probably going to be out of it so don't tell him anything you want him to remember."

I nod my head and walk into the room. I see Brendon hooked up to machines and an IV. Brendon looks at me and starts crying. "Shhh. It's okay," I say as I walk over to him. "I'm sorry. I'm so s-sorry. It's all my fault. I'm sorry." 

"Shhh. It's not your fault." "Yes it is. I sh-should've told you about the pills," Brendon says. "Where did you get them?" "I-I got em in the mail." "What do you mean?" I ask, "who sent them to you?"

"I g-got em in th-the mail," Brendon repeats himself. "I know but from who?" I ask again. "G-G- I got em from the mail." "What we're you gonna say?" "I-I forgot. Just forget it." "No! Brendon please tell me who sent them?"

"I don't know," Brendon says. "It's okay we'll figure out later," I say. I'm so mad. Who would send Brendon Xanax. Why would someone do that. "Hey Dallon?" "Yeah?" "I love you." "I love you too but never do that again." "I won't."

Soon Zack arrives. We let Brendon sleep while Zack gets food from the cafeteria. I rest my head on Brendon's lap. I wake up Brendon when Zack gets back with the food. "I'm not really hungry," Brendon says, "my stomach hurts." "It's okay maybe you can try later," I tell him.

It's not until four hours later when the nurse tells us that Brendon can be released. It's around mid night. The nurse puts gauze over Brendon's stitches and tells him how to take care of them. Then he gets unhooked from all the machines and the IV. Then he gets handed his discharge papers and we get ready to leave.

I open the passenger side door to let Brendon in the car then go back around to the drivers side and hop in. I hold Brendon's hand the entire way home. While we're at a stop light I try to ask him again, "who mailed you the Xanax?" "Oh uh can we talk about this when we get home?" Brendon asks. "Sure."

When we finally get home I let Brendon go get changed while I clean up the blood mess in the bathroom. Then I sit down on the couch with Brendon. "So who mailed you the pills?" I ask for what feels like the thousandth time.

Brendon looks down like he's about to cry. I rub his back. "It's okay." "Gerard mailed them to me with a note saying for whenever you're suicidal thoughts come back."

I'm going to kill Gerard.