July 15, 2018

I bolted out of bed at six o'clock in the morning, unable to sleep. My cousins were still asleep in the basement, and I tried to go back to bed, but I couldn't. I was too worried about the regatta. For a moment, I wondered if Véro was having the same thoughts that I was. I wondered if she was playing out every possible scenario in her head, calculating how we could beat the odds and win this race.

Eventually, I gave up on trying to sleep and reached for my phone. I checked the weather and saw that there wouldn't be any storms until tonight, so the race definitely wouldn't be canceled. The wind was just heavy enough that I would never be able to sail this race by myself, but it would still be an exciting race. Any hope that I might have had that the race would be rescheduled and Véro and I would get another week to prepare were gone now. Today was the day.

At around seven, I rolled out of bed, went into the kitchen, and made myself breakfast. Chase was up now, even though the rest of the family was still asleep, and as he entered the kitchen, he said, "Hi, Sylvie. Why are you up so early?"

"I need to get ready for my race," I said. "What about you?"

"I just couldn't sleep," Chase said. "Scott was snoring too much."

"That's too bad," I said.

"Yeah, but I'll get my own room again when we go home," Chase said. "Good luck on your race."

"Thanks, Chase," I said.

"Do you want some cereal?" I asked as I dug through the pantry.

"Do you have any Lucky Charms?" Chase asked.

"I think so," I said as I pulled out a box of Lucky Charms. I poured Chase a bowl of cereal and then handed it to him. "I'm sure my parents will make you better breakfast later though."

"I'd rather have this," Chase said as he devoured his breakfast. "Mom and Dad never let me get sugary cereal."

I rolled my eyes. Chase clearly didn't understand what constituted a good breakfast, but then again, neither did I when I was eleven. I ate my own bowl of cereal and then left the house. Chase wished me good luck again, but I knew that none of my cousins would come to watch me. They were only here for another day, and they had better things to do. Grandma, on the other hand, was probably already in the judge's boat, and Grandpa wouldn't be far behind. Mom and Dad were still asleep, but once the race got going, they would probably come to watch too.

When I got to the pier, Véro was already there. "Hi Sylvie," she said. "Are you ready to race?"

"Of course I am," I said. I quickly kissed her, hoping that Grandma wouldn't somehow notice us from the other end of the lake.

"Me too," Véro said, climbing into the boat. She had already set up the boat for us, and she took the sheet line, letting me steer towards the starting line.

At the starting line, I spotted tons of familiar and unfamiliar faces. Nearly every member of the Clearwater Lake Junior League was sailing in the regatta, and there were tons of people from out of town as well. Judging by the stickers attached to their boat, one pair of sailors had come all the way from North Dakota to sail in the Clearwater Lake regatta. I didn't realize that there were people out there that were that dedicated to sailing in a junior regatta in a tiny lake in northern Wisconsin.

I waved to Grandma as I sailed past her boat, but before long, her flags told us that we had only five minutes left before the race would start. Véro panicked, but I stayed calm, navigating the boat as close to the starting line as possible without going past it. When the race began, I shifted the tiller so that I could cross the starting line and head towards the first buoy. We were the first boat to get past the starting line, and for a while, we were in the lead.

After we rounded the first buoy, our luck began to shift. Véro and I switched spots so that I had the sheet line, and Véro had the tiller, and although Véro kept us on the right course, I couldn't quite keep up with the constantly changing wind. I shouted instructions to Véro, but it was no use. As we approached the second buoy, Eden and Brooke's boat passed us. Eden waved, shouting "Good luck, Sylvie!" but somehow, this only made me feel worse.

"We're going to lose at this rate, Véro!" I exclaimed.

"Don't worry," Véro said. "We'll catch up."

We rounded the second buoy, and I crossed my fingers that we could pass Eden and Brooke on the final leg of the race. However, it didn't seem like it was going to happen. They were too far ahead, and despite our best efforts, they passed the finish line far before we did. Véro and I were at full speed as we headed toward the finish, but it just wasn't enough. I grimaced as I watched the two of them celebrate, knowing that we would never get the honor of finishing in first.

Véro and I crossed the finish line about five minutes after Eden and Brooke, placing in second. The third place boat was from out of town, and they finished only seconds after we did, making it clear just how close we were to doing even worse in this race. "Sylvie, we still have two more races," Véro said when she saw how disappointed I was.

"It's going to be hard to come back from this," I said. "We might still win, but it's going to be a lot harder."

"We still have another week to practice before the race next week," Véro pointed out.

"I know," I said, but Véro's attempts at comforting me didn't help much. I still felt like we had failed.

"Do you want to come to my house after we put the boat away?" Véro said.

"That would be nice," I said.

When we arrived at the shore, Véro and I took down the sail, cleaned off the boat, and headed into her house. I quickly texted my parents to tell them where I was, and then we went into Véro's basement. Mr. Arkoun, as expected, was watching the World Cup finals in the living room, and Mrs. Arkoun tried to start a conversation with me. After a few minutes, however, Véro grabbed my hand and led me into the basement.

"You don't know how Maman is," Véro said. "She will try to talk to you for the rest of the day if you just stay there."

Véro and I ended up cuddling on the couch in her basement, watching some French TV show that Véro liked. Of course, I didn't understand any of the dialogue, so all I could understand was that it somehow involved women going shopping. Although I didn't get how this was entertaining at all, Véro seemed to like it.

All of a sudden, my phone began to ring. I untangled myself from Véro and saw that Eden was calling. "Hello?" I said.

"Sylvie, what are you doing?" Véro asked, but I didn't answer. I could explain later.

"Hi Sylvie," Eden said. "Do you want to come over to my house? I was thinking that we could watch some Pixar movies."

"I'm a little busy right now," I said, annoyed that Eden had interrupted my time with Véro for something so inconsequential.

"Sylvie, I know you're lying," Eden said. When I didn't respond, she said, "I talked to your mom after the race, and she said that you weren't doing anything after the race."

"I made plans after the race was over," I said.

"Then why don't you come over later?" Eden suggested.

"I'm going to be busy for a while," I said.

"Just come over when you can," Eden said. "I've missed watching movies with you."

I hung up, eager to go back to cuddling with Véro, but as I lay next to her on the couch, guilt consumed me. Eden had been nothing but nice to me, and I had been a jerk to my best friend. I had to go over to her house and make amends.

After only an hour, I told Véro that I had to leave. "Where are you going?" she asked.

"Eden's house," I said. "I haven't been spending enough time with her lately. I'll see you tomorrow, Véro."

"See you tomorrow, Sylvie," Véro said.

As I made my way upstairs, Mr. Arkoun opened the door to the basement and shouted, "France won the World Cup!"

Véro cheered, but I couldn't bring myself to care about soccer. The World Cup was the last thing on my mind as I left the Arkouns' house and walked to the Reinharts'. Over and over, I rehearsed what I was going to say to Eden when I saw her. I knew that I had to apologize to her, and on my way to her house, I decided that she deserved to know about Véro. She was the only person other than Véro who even knew that I was gay, and she was my best friend. If anyone deserved to know, it was Eden.

I knocked on the front door of the Reinharts' house, and Mrs. Reinhart immediately let me in. "Hi Sylvie," she said. "It's good to see you."

"It's good to see you too," I said.

"Eden's in the living room," she said. I immediately headed there, and sure enough, Eden was lying on the couch, ready to watch Toy Story 3.

"Hey Sylvie," Eden said as she turned the movie on.

"Hi Eden," I said. "Congratulations on winning the regatta."

Eden shrugged and said, "It was mostly Brooke. I was just there to make sure the boat didn't tip over. Do you want to watch Toy Story 3? I can put a different movie in if you'd rather watch something else."

"Toy Story 3 is fine," I said.

"Great," Eden said as the movie began to play. "What were you doing after the regatta? I've been mostly hanging around here."

"I was at Véro's house," I said. "I'm sorry for being mean about it earlier. I just wanted to have a little bit more time with her."

"It's fine," Eden said. "I just don't know why you didn't tell me that you two were together earlier."

"How did you know?" I asked, surprised.

"It's not that hard to put two and two together, Sylvie," Eden said. "How long have you two been dating?"

"Almost two weeks," I said. It seemed like it had been far longer.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Eden asked.

"I don't know," I said.

"I feel like you're ignoring me in favor of her," Eden complained.

"You've been busy too," I said.

"Yes, but we could be hanging out more," Eden said. "Instead, you're sailing with Véro every morning and going to her house every afternoon. We never get to hang out anymore."

"It's not every afternoon," I said.

"It sure feels like it," Eden said, "and you won't even be honest with me about it."

"I never directly lied to you," I said.

"Lying by omission is just as bad if you ask me," Eden argued.

"I'm sorry, Eden," I said.

"You're not sorry," Eden said.

I didn't even bother continuing to argue with Eden. Both of us stared at the TV, watching the movie, and as usual, bawling at the end. However, once the movie was over, I went straight home. Eden and I didn't exchange another word the whole time that I was there.

On my way home, I worried about my friendship with Eden, which seemed to be crumbling before my very eyes. I wanted to be a better friend to her, but I didn't know how to do that and be a good girlfriend to Véro too. I had told her the truth, and I promised myself that I would make more of an effort to spend time with her, but I wasn't sure how I could undo the damage that I had already done this summer. Maybe it just wasn't possible.

After I got home, I pulled out my phone and texted Eden, "I'm sorry for everything, and I want to hang out with you more this summer. Will you forgive me?" It wasn't much, but it was a start. Anything that might heal my friendship with Eden seemed like it was a good thing to do. More than anything, I just wanted my best friend back.