So I was watching Canola Holmes

Which stars Henry Cavill as Sherlock Holmes 😳

(Me: *bites lip* solve me like one of your mysteries, Sherbabe

Sherlock Holmes: 😐 Well, firstly, you're unemployed, the bags under your eyes inform me that while you get enough sleep you don't sleep in the usual hours in which the majority sleeps - which means you wake up late. Not something I'd want in an employee. Your bed sheets remain in a crumpled position during the times in which you don't sleep and since your knuckle eczema hasn't flared yet I'd supposed you've skipped out on dishes a time or two. Your clothes are crumpled when you wear them which means they spend most of their time on the floor of your bedroom. You're 21 and yet you always dress and act younger so that if anything goes wrong in which you'd be held accountable, you wouldn't because no one believes you're an adult. Your feet are covered in dirt, even when youre upper body is clean because you wear the same shoes on every occasion and your nailpolish is always chipped meaning that you don't believe your nails are pretty enough in the nail polish and therefore don't care if its damaged. 

Me:

)

Anyway

This guy

He's idk 19?

Which means he's younger than me😔

But that's okay

Because I'm a cougar👍😺