Its only Monday. I wouldn't call it the most exhilarating day of the week, but today, today was the most anxiety driven day of my life.

It was the day of my school fair, I am a music student and I had been picked to perform in front of an audience. The day started off normal, get up, shower, get dressed and get on the bus. The great thing about the fair, is that we get to wear free dress instead of the school uniform. I was waiting at the bus mall for the school bus. My hands felt like ice because of the rain that had fallen the night before and the frost that had coated the grass. There she began to walk. Marceline was a good friend of mine, I call her Marcy, prior to today we spent time sitting in the lounge just talking about anime and stuff like that. "Hey Gwen" she said with a big smile. Her black hair hung over her shoulder. She was wearing a pain of blue jeans and a pretty black top with silver sequences around the top. She looked beautiful.
"Hey Marcy, how are you not cold in that"
"don't worry, I'm about to put my jacket on" she pulled out a blue puffer jacket. The hoods inside was pink and it had a white fluffy thing on the outside, I have no idea how I remember all those things, everything else in that moment seemed so trivial.
"You going to the fair tonight?"
"I'm not quite sure yet, I might show up"
"I hope you do go, I think you'll enjoy it"

The bus pulled up and we got on. There were 2 free seats.
"I have a question. Why is it you have never dated anyone. Guys have asked you a couple of times, but you have never dated?" I have never really thought about this before. In my life time I've had 2 guys ask me out.
"I mean, I've had crushes, I think. Honestly I have no clue how love works. I read books and see it in movies all the time. But I can never see myself with someone. It's a little childish for me to expect romance to happen like how it's in the books and how it would be the perfect relationship. So, I guess I haven't met someone who I can see myself with"
"you'll find someone one day Gwen, I know it" she said with a smile. She hugged me. I won't ever forget that hug. We arrived at school and went our separate ways.

Periods 1 and 2 were a blur. I couldn't wait for recess. Once the bell went. I retreated to my small oasis, the music room. In there was a group of the popular girls. The one named Sky noticed me and looked up. "Hey Gwen, your smart, here's my question, why is it when I think of love, I see him?"
"Um I'm confused sorry, who is Him"
"My ex Gwen, look, when you think of love, what's the first thing to pop into your head? Well with me it's him. I can't get over him Gwen." I had never thought about this before. I thought about love and the first person to pop into my head was Marcy. I couldn't believe it. Me being me, I ran away with my eyes watering at this revelation. I knew I had to tell her. I wasn't sure how exacly. But in that moment I knew I should write a song about it.

I spent that whole school day working on that song. I knew that if I convinced her to go tonight she might accept me. The song was stressful. I couldn't, at the time, figure out what love was, how it made me feel. I just wrote down words of what I thought when I heard her voice. Happy, confused, excited, alive, free... I have no clue what love is. I'm only 15 after all so it's all so new.

The final bell rang and I went down to the fair grounds to set up the stage. I was sitting alone for a while. I knew I had to go on stage early on. I was about to walk on with my song, then Marcy walked in. "Hey Marcy, I'm so happy you came" I went into a hug but she stepped back.
"Um Gwen, I need to tell you something."
"You can tell me anything"
"I have a boyfriend. I just thought you'd need to know, I'm sorry" I felt my stomach turn, I began to shake.
"Oh yeah um that's fine, yeah. I got to go on stage now so".

I never ended up performing that song. I played a song by Greenday. After the show I went to the music room. My oasis in the sands of my newly found heartbreak. I went in, the room dark, and cried. I heard shuffling. And there I saw sky, doing the same as me. Crying. "Sky are you ok?" I asked.
"No Gwen. Why is it when you love someone, they don't return it, why is it when your heart is broken no one cares?"
"People care sky, they just, can't see what it does to you when they forget to show it"
"you really are oblivious huh"
"what can I say, socially awkward is my game" we sat there a while. And then, she hugged me. We walked out to the fair. I stopped at the stage and grabbed the lyrics for the song I wrote. It might come in handy one day.