Sasha frowned, what the hell? "No, I never. I never killed anyone." She shook her head even though the person couldn't see her. If she shook her head fiercely enough she might make herself believe it.

She hadn't killed anyone, had she?

"I got a note." The person on the other side of the door said. "Please, open the door so I can show you."

Sasha fought with her brain, and then sighed. She turned the key in the lock, pushed the door open ajar. "Pass it through."

The person sighed, "Why are you doing this?" They asked, "I don't deserve to be locked up." But they pushed the note through anyway.

Sasha grabbed it. I killed them, I killed everyone. It was her handwriting. She felt sick. Who would copy her handwriting?

Who would be stupid enough to confess everything and pretend to be someone else. She closed her eyes as she shut the door again, turning the key once more. "I need to go." Her brain was working overtime to connect the dots.

"No, Sasha. No!" The person yelled. "Don't you dare leave me here. Sasha!" There was silence for a few minutes before the person was pounding on the door. "Sasha!"

Sasha was already walking away.

------------

Sasha couldn't pay any attention in class. The teacher's voice just droned on and on until it blurred into the background with the other background noises, like the hum of the radiator. Sasha leant back in her seat and closed her eyes. She didn't even bother to hide it from the tutor. Everyone else was looking at their phones, scrolling through social media. Her friends weren't in this class, so she sat alone. 

When the class ended, the tutor glared at her, "Sasha. Can you stay behind, please?" She did so. She walked to the front of the class, where the tutor took a seat and crossed his ankle over his knee, his hands on it so he could lean into it. 

"I wanted to talk to you because I'm a little concerned. Last night, you submitted your assignment under the word count, and today, you seemed to sleep during my whole lesson. I know that Emily's death has impacted this University greatly, but I am a little concerned for you."

"I'm fine, Sir." She lied. "I just didn't have a good weekend, that's all." Why was he concerned for her and not anyone else? Had he spoken to the head teacher, the head teacher at the University knew about her past, but she'd said she wouldn't tell anyone else. So she wouldn't share it with him, would she? Unless the death of Emily had prompted her to tell someone, and being the head of the department, he knew. Maybe the head teacher had thought someone needed to look out for her. Like she was somehow a victim in all of this? 

They were all clueless. Sasha wasn't a victim. She'd never been a victim; she was the disaster. Brushing everyone she met with the finger of death and destruction until there was nothing left in her wake. 

"Are you sure?" The teacher narrowed his eyes, "Because there's free counselling support for anyone impacted by Emily's death, and I think you might benefit from-"

"Honestly." She cut him off. "I'm completely fine." Could he tell she was lying? Why did he keep pushing the matter? Sasha wasn't sure how many more times she could say she was okay before she would break down in tears. "I didn't even know Emily." She told him. 

"As long as you're sure." He replied. She nodded and grabbed her bag. She walked over to the door and glanced back at him over her shoulder before sighing and leaving. 

----

There were pictures of Emily scattered around the memorial, bouquets of flowers wrapped in multi-coloured paper, and people huddled together, some crying, some just talking, but everyone shrouded in melancholy. Some crosses had been made from lollipop sticks and painted with sentiments like Gone too soon and Rest in peace, Emily. Sasha focused on the lit candles, dancing in the breeze. It all looked so beautiful, but there was nothing attractive about the way Emily had died; it was savage. 

On the edge of the whole thing was a teddy bear, and that's where Sasha decided to put her card. It had flowers on it underneath a cross, sparkly letters spelling out Sorry for your loss. She hadn't signed the inside because it felt redundant to put her name as if the whole thing was about her. She stood up straight and looked at the scene in front of her. She inhaled deeply before exhaling. "Sasha!" She heard Riley behind her, so she turned around and approached him. Beside him, Lennie was staring at the memorial, and Jaide and Roscoe were whispering to each other. 

In the crowd, Sasha was sure she could hear someone snickering. She glanced around but couldn't see the source of the noise. Who on earth would be laughing at a time like this? Roscoe's lighter clicks to her right, and he holds the naked flame to his cigarette. "I didn't know you smoked?" Sasha frowns at him. 

"There's lots of things you don't know about me." Roscoe winked at her. Sasha turns away, trying to hide her shudder. That wink said so much more than it needed to. Sasha eyed the security staff, making their way around the gathering. She was somewhat surprised that none of them had bothered to shut down the event; it was clear that the event was organised by the students and had nothing to do with the faculty staff of the University. 

"So, do we just pay our respects and then go?" Lennie asked. She glanced around the crowd.

"I don't know," Roscoe replied; he ran a hand through his hair, the cigarette staying perched between his lips despite him talking. "Maybe someone's going to do a speech or something." 

The girl standing just in front of the memorial raised the megaphone to be heard, but not knowing how to use it properly, she screamed into it. Nearly everyone covered their ears, yet Sasha could still hear her clearly, even with her hands over her own. "Thank you all for being here tonight. Emily would've been overwhelmed by this. She had a way of lighting up a room with her kindness and humour. She was passionate about animals and always ready to support her friends. She encouraged everyone to be their best."

"She was a bitch." Someone in the crowd said. Sasha glanced around, trying to find the source of the words. 

"I'll never forget when she was working at the University Starbucks, and she accidentally swapped someone's coffee order for a smoothie. Rather than panicking and apologising, she convinced them it was a 'new trend' and made them laugh. That was Emily - quick on her feet and always able to turn a mistake into a funny story." 

"She wasn't that quick on her feet!" Someone yelled, "Or she'd have gotten away." A few people sniggered.

"I thought she was rather rude." Another person said. How could they be so disrespectful? Someone was dead. Sasha's jaw tightened; why did she feel so bad? It wasn't like they were disrespecting someone she knew or cared about. It wasn't like they were being disrespectful to... She shook her head, shaking the thought away. 

"Emily would've made everyone feel seen and cared for. So, today, we make her feel seen and cared for. She would've wanted us to be kinder to the world around us, and I think that's why so many of us are here tonight - not just because we miss her, but because she made such a profound impact on all of us." Some of the members of the crowd whoop and cheer, some of them stay silent. 

"So, let's remember Emily for the incredible person she was. Let's carry forward her kindness and her love for animals and the planet. She might be gone, but she'll always be a part of us." The girl with the megaphone was crying. She raised her hand to cover her mouth as if it were all just part of a show to her. She stepped away from the memorial, crying into her hand. 

"Abide with me! fast falls the eventide;
The darkness deepens; Lord, with me abide!" The students began singing, and everyone started joining in. Gradually people passed out candles to each other, taking one and passing it on until everyone had their candles.

Sasha took her candle from Riley; she smiled at him sadly. He smiled back, but his smile didn't seem so sad. Riley didn't know Emily, like how Sasha didn't know her. But Sasha wasn't sad for Emily, she was sad for another reason, for another person. She was sad for another time.

A hipflask of vodka was passed around, Riley swallowed more than everyone else, and handed it to Sasha, who took a quick swig of the burning ethanol before passing it to her left, passing it to Roscoe, who grinned. He was the only one grinning.

-----

The church bells rang, and the girls mother pulled Sasha into a hug. Sasha could feel the mother crying against her, but she couldn't bring herself to react, she was emotionally numb to the world, emotionally dead.

"She would've wanted you to be here so badly." The mother said, "I'm so glad you could make it."

Sasha couldn't do anything but nod. Guilt was a stone that had lodged itself in her throat, and it hurt like hell to try and talk past it.

The girl wouldn't have wanted her there, she would've wanted Sasha at the pub, doing Karaoke. Celebrating the fact that she had lived, not mourning the loss of her death.

-------

"Sasha." Roscoe elbowed her in the ribs. "Earth to Sasha."

"Shit." She jolted out of her daydream, if it could even be called that at night time. "Ow, Roscoe what the hell?"

He motions to her candle which is almost completely just wick. "I thought I'd just try and prevent you from setting yourself on fire."

"Oh, God." She blew the flame out. The majority of people had cleared off. She hadn't even realised she'd been so deep into her imagination, her memories. "Where's everyone gone?"

"There's an after party at Louisa's." Roscoe shrugged, "But, Lennie and Jaide have gone back home. Riley just kind of walked."

"Where?" Sasha asked.

"I don't know. He headed in that direction." Roscoe pointed toward a block of flats. "No idea where he's going. I don't think even he knows where he's going."

Unless he does. The thought hit Sasha at full force, she almost did a 180 and took off running after Riley. But she managed to control herself, to stand her ground. "And where are you going?" She asked Roscoe.

He shrugged. "Figured I'd go to the after party." He admitted. "I don't really want to be alone right now."

She glanced at the block of flats, making a mental note of which ones and where everyone was.

Roscoe - with Sasha.
Riley - who knows, in Bell court but could be walking anywhere.
Lennie - at home.
Jaide - at home.

Something didn't sit right with Sasha.

"I'll come to the after party with you." She grinned at Roscoe, if she had to choose between who seemed more guilty right now, she'd pick Roscoe. Which in nearly every crime thriller she'd ever read, that meant that she'd stick to Roscoe like butter to bread until she could prove he was innocent.

Which she might never be able to do.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Roscoe asked her, suddenly cautious. "Parties aren't really your scene are they?"

She smirked. "Since when? I love a good party."

"Alright." He shrugged. "Let's go then, party girl." They walked alongside each other, Sasha desperately trying to match his steps, as if they would provide some kind of clue.

He glanced over his shoulder, and then turned back and smiled at Sasha. "There's no one around." He grinned. "I don't think I've ever seen the campus so quiet."

Her blood ran cold. No one would hear her scream.

"Yeah." She replied, "it's a little strange."

"Disconcerting maybe." He added thoughtfully, "eerie. Creepy."

She frowned at him, her blood running colder with every word. "Okay, and your point is?"

"Who says I have one?" He smirked. "I thought we were just thinking of adjectives to describe the night."

She narrowed her eyes at him. God, she didn't want to be following him right now. She had to change the subject. "Do you think they'll close the University if another body is found. They can't expect us to stay here if everyone is dying, can they?"

He shook his head. "How on Earth would I know?" He asked. "But most likely, that's what normally happens in crime scenes isn't it? If the whole University becomes a crime scene, we'll be evacuated. That'll put an end to your little investigation."

She glared at him. "You mean the investigation you kicked me off of."

He frowned at her. "What? I didn't kick you off any investigation." She searched his face for dishonesty but she saw nothing but confusion.

"Wait, but-" before she could continue what she was saying he reached out, to push her? To grab her? It didn't matter.

She fell anyway.