T/W : angst, suicide

--

seungmin laid on his bed, just staring at the ceiling. he had two vocal lessons for the day and that was it. he felt like he was in an alternate universe.

he had free time.

his phone buzzed and his hand moved towards it. 

hyunjinnie:

baby

meet me at 6 outside your dorms. i'm gonna take you out.

seungmin's eyes widened at the texts. meet me. the corners of his lips turned up slowly. his boyfriend was being cocky. and cute. but also cocky.

seungmin:

what if i say no?

hyunjinnie:

then i'll just break into your dorms, pick you up, throw you in the boot of the car and drag you to where i wanna take you.

the younger giggled and turned on his stomach, his legs intertwining. 

seungmin:

why so violent?

hyunjinnie:

who said it was violent? i could be kissing you the whole time. 

just not when you're in the boot, obviously.

seungmin:

obviously.

hyunjinnie:

so that's a yes then?

seungmin: 

clean the boot. 

seungmin rolled his eyes, a smile on his face. he was smiling so hard his cheeks hurt but he couldn't help it. hyunjin always made him like this.

when they'd text at 3am, seungmin always felt a rush in his stomach when the little dots popped up, hyunjin typing back. he didn't think he could be so attached to someone.

he sighed and got up, a stupid love drunk expression on his features, going to make some ramen and probably play video games with felix, to pass the time. if he wasn't fucking jeongin.

seungmin traipsed over to jeongin's room, closed fist levitating above the door, about to knock when he heard a noise.

"fuck, ngh l-lix right th-there!"

seungmin turned on his heel, grabbed his phone and pulled on a mask, slamming the door behind him as went out. no way in hell was he staying and eating ramen while members of the maknae line were banging.

the second youngest dawdled around, walking up and down the streets, the air becoming colder by the minute. he reached a large open field, spotting some daisies and a convenience store on the other side.

seungmin sighed in relief and began to cross the road. before he could turn, a choked gasp was torn from his throat as a car slammed into him from his side.

seungmin was thrown onto the road, head pounding and an iron flavour spreading on his tongue.

his mangled, bleeding body lay sprawled out on the tarmac, shallow breaths emitting from his cracked ribs. tears stung his eyes as his vision began to darken, hearing shouts that sounded so distant.

in the corner of his eyes, he saw his phone light up beside him, hyunjin's name illuminating the cracked screen. his fingers trembled as he tried to reach for it, to mumble his last words to his lover.

stray kids, hyunjin, stay. i think i'm dying. thank you for taking the time to love me. 

i guess i'll meet hyunjin in the afterlife, someday.

someone ran over, shaking him as his features relaxed, eyes fluttering to a close, like someone poured oil over his face. his spine cracked as the person moved him, bones displacing themselves in his last painful moments of life.

the disfigured body of blood, skin and bone released its last exhale, the soul of kim seungmin dissipating into the harsh winter winds.

--

"what do you mean?" hyunjin yelled through heavy sobs, his body collapsing to the ground. 

"he ... fuck." chan was like a ghost, perched on the chair. "s-seungmin is - dead."

it was as if someone had pushed a gnarly thorn into hyunjin's heart, twisting and twisting until he couldn't breathe.

"n-no, no," the crying man chanted, rubbing his tears away, "seungmin is not dead. you're fucking lying! i-i spoke to him this morning, he's probably just out. they've got the wrong person!"

minho, who was crying himself, walked over to hyunjin, taking him into his arms. hyunjin thrashed around, trying to get out of his hyung's grip. after a few tries, he went limp.

this is real.

seungmin is gone.

he'd never see that beautiful smile ever again, his laugh, his adorable boba eyes. he'd never hear seungmin's witty remarks, or his hushed sweet tones, him speak ever again. hyunjin lost the man he wanted to marry.

"no, i-i can fix this. i can find seungmin. i wanna see him, i need to s-see him." hyunjin bolted out the door, running up the fire escape stairs, ignoring his members' yells, to the top of the building.

he broke down in wails as he flung the door open. "seungmin!" he screamed, curling into a ball, his body shaking. he screamed into the cold winter air, all his pain, anger, happiness.

hyunjin's hand reached for his phone, throwing the case aside and gently taking out the picture that was inside.

it was a photo of the two, from a photobooth they went to on their first official date. 

four years ago.

they were wearing silly items, a chicken hat and funny looking sunglasses. in that moment, before the shutter went off, seungmin pulled hyunjin into a kiss, his glasses going crooked on his face and seungmin's hat covering his eyes.

the photo caught their first kiss together.

hyunjin gasped for his breath, his face soaked with tears. he held tightly onto the picture, mind rushing with all his mixed emotions. he shakily stood up and walked to the edge of the building., the air stinging his tear streaked cheeks.

"seungmin, i-i want to see you again. i hope we meet each other in our next life, and get married and grow old together."

hyunjin closed his eyes, exhaling slowly, a longing smile on his lips. he pressed a soft kiss to the photo, allowing himself to drop off the bricks below him.

--

the glossy picture floated down, landing peacefully atop hyunjin's unmoving chest. 

it was all okay now. they could be together in peace.

i don't think angst is my strong suit, but i like writing it.

also, blame it on horny jeonglix, they're the reason he went out.

i love jeonglix too much to be mad at em for killing seungmo.