How many times had she felt her heart sank that day? Only a few minutes had passed since noon and her day had already been crushed multiple times over. Her mouth closed as she realized the words in her throat wouldn't dare to come out in a time like this.

She looked up at his fetures. He's still wearing the same expression as before. A dishonest smile. She could tell he was waiting for her to respond. Either with anger, hurt or acceptance. She knows he wanted her to react with the first two options, but she also knows that he knows she couldn't. That's when it hit her.

He wants me to hate him...

He had been figured out, as usual. Watching her eyes widen once again, he lost all hope of getting rid of the heavy guilt he felt. Even after going through everything, he still felt as though he was still in square one. As if they were still strangers coincidentally running into each other. Thinking back several years, they only became friends because Kira introduced them to one another. He wondered what would things have been like if he didn't. He definitely wouldn't be in this situation. He wouldn't have been able to dedicate his life to music as much as he does now. He would be nothing more than a face. An image for people to look at and take advantage of. In other words, he'd still be a slut.

In a short while, she noticed his expression changing. Not much could be observed, but she could clearly see how sad his eyes are. Almost as if he was... Begging? "Eiichi..." He took a step forward. She called him again and he took another. The way he walked reminded her of a puppet being dragged by its master. When he was right infront of her, she called for him one more time and he bent down on both knees.

He was helpless. Hopeless. Every inch felt like a mile and with every mile, the worse he feels. Something... Someone who's very important to you. They're just in front of you. Stretch out your hand and you can touch them easily. But you can't reach them. No matter how hard you try, you just can't.

♪'Haato no door no kii wa doko ni aru? Where is ai?'♪
((♪'Where is the key to the heart's Door? Where is the love?'♪))

♪'Egoisuto ni breakin' sarakedashita honnou'♪
((♪'Breakin' our egos and exposing our instinct'♪))

♪'Chikatte yaru, nani yori mo tsuyoi LOVE sa'♪
((♪'I swear I will love more strongly than anything'♪))

♪'Kakusu na kako no kizuato wo'♪
((♪'Don't hide the scars from your past'♪))

♪'Kaihou sa...'♪
((♪'I'll release you...'♪))

♪'Mune no kanashimi
Kakusu mono janai'♪
((♪'The sorrow in your chest
Is not something to hide'♪))

Those lyrics he had sang now had no meaning in them. It felt empty. Why? He had felt so lively when singing. He had everything he wanted now, so why is everything still so... so...

She frowned as she watched him struggle to restrain himself. Slowly, she pushed herself off the bed and sat in front of him, a hand on his shoulder. "Eiichi?" He stiffened. Well, at least she knew he was listening. "You look... scared..."

Scared? Oh no, he was far from that. He's terrified of what's to come. When you have nothing more to gain, all you can do is lose. And he doesn't want that. He doesn't want to lose anything. He couldn't bare the thought that, with just a snap of two fingers, everything could be taken away. A very small part of him prayed that his father wouldn't do such a thing, but he knew better. He wasn't ready to let go for a third time.

He snapped his head up when something cold touched his cheek. Her palm had rested there and the metal rims of the ring made a chill run down his spine. He peered at her face. She flushed upon being looked at, but she didn't pull away. His own hand went up and held hers, evelopping the ring. Taking her other hand, he brought them together and kissed them. For a moment, he had forgotten everything he thought about.

She inwardly sighed. She had honestly thought that things were starting to brighten up thanks to her surgery and their engagement, but apparently reality had other things planned. This is the first time she had seen him just that close to breaking. If she hadn't known him for this long, she would've been shocked to see him in such a fragile state. But she had, and she knows, better than anyone, just how much it takes for his cup to overflow.

Only a moment later that she found herself being lifted onto his lap and embraced. She smiled softly and hugged him back. Faint whispers then began to reach her ears. She listened to every word, to every little thing he needed to say while rubbing circles on his back for comfort. After pouring everything he had, his expression shifted and he began to whisper sweet nothings in her ear. Her cheeks turned scarlet but after a while, she exchanged some with him as well. They sat there for a long time, comforting one another and just letting each other know how much they mean to them. How much they need them. How much they love them.

After a while, he stopped and sighed. "You know... I really envy you. Everyone, actually."

She didn't pull away, but her ears did twitch. "Hm?"

"It's just that... You all can afford to make mistakes." He patted her head. "I wish I had that kind of freedom." She purred, but didn't speak. She really had no idea on what to say to comfort him and could only hope her small actions were enough.

Pulling out a much gentler smile, he chuckled. "Thanks for listening though. It helped a lot more than you think." Then he smirked. "Is this why girls are only into guys who are all ears?"

She shoved him lightly on the shoulder with a smile. "Not all girls are like that. I mean, I'm into you, aren't I?"

"Hey, I can be a good listener too." He rolled his eyes, but his smile was still there. "I just have a stronger habit of romancing you. Like this." He gave a small lick on her earlobe, making it red. He proceeded to run his tounge down on her neck and he nipped on her collar, making her hiss slightly.

She felt his smirk on her skin and let out a silent whimper. "E-Eiichi! Come on! Give me a break!"

He chuckled. "You can't lie to me. I know you like this, angel~"

She blushed. "T-This isn't about whether I like it or not! I-I just don't-"

"You're not even denying it." He softly pecked her lips and pulled away. "I know the limits angel, trust me."

Shyly, she nodded. "I trust you... I just get... worried..."

He chuckled as he lifted her off of him. "About what? We've been together this long."

She got up and sat on the bed again, him following suit. "Well, for a start..." She took a deep breath. "While your father could be one thing, I'm always thinking about how your fans would react. Like... At least Raging, even if he was against it, he pretty much got over it and he just bothers you about it too much. But if it's the fans then... It could really have an impact in your career. Idols are supposed to stay single for their fans' sake, right?"

He hummed a reply. "So, to wrap it up in a sentence, you're worried about us getting caught?"

"That's right.." She nodded.

He snorted. "Well if that's it then there's nothing to worry about."

"What?"

"You're friendly to everyone. And I mean everyone. No matter where or when it is, you could easily talk to people and you even jump on them and give them hugs sometimes. Because of your personality, we could easily come off as just really close friends." He explained. "In short, as long as we don't kiss in public, everything will be fine."

"You kiss me in public all the time!" She exclaimed, cheeks flaring at her own words.

"But not on the lips, right?" He retorted, smirking. "Be honest with yourself. In public, does it really feel like we're so obviously a couple?"

She bit her bottom lip. It's true that they acted more like best friends than a couple in public without actually realizing it. They didn't have any plans on hiding their relationship at the start, and yet it seemed to have the opposite effect. The only time when they truly acted like a couple was when they're alone. Because neither of them liked showing weakness in front of anyone but the other. Wow... I didn't even notice until now...

Looking at her expression, he smiled. "See? There's nothing to worry about."

She nodded and returned the smile. "Yeah, okay." Glancing at the clock, her eyes widen. "We've been talking for a long time. It's almost 2. We should go have lunch now before the others worry."

"We can have each other for lunch."

"Eiichi, that's- NO."

~~~~~

So the previous four chapters made me think I should really go take a break from all the angst, so I'm gonna make the next few as fluffy as possible. Enjoy!