"don't thank me just yet"

My hands were coated in a thick layer of sweat and I was afraid that I would drop my phone on to my face. My breathing was rapid and my heart was louder than an elephant stomping up the stairs. I was lying on my back with my head rested on a large marshmallow-like pillow and with my phone in the air above my face.

It was only twelve past six in the morning and I'd spent the last twenty minutes trying to type up a draft. I know it was a horrible thing to do but I couldn't say no to his face. My words would be chained and would come out as stutters.

Now there was another chain restraining me back from pressing send.

Hey Sam,
I thought about your offer and I'm really sorry but I can't right now. Exams are commencing and it will be too hard for me to focus. I'm really sorry.

It was a short message but that was all I needed to say.

I leaked an unsteady breath and slowly pressed my thumb onto the send button.

After a second, I heard the sound of the message being sent and quickly exited the app. I swiftly clicked on to instagram and scrolled distracted through my feed; waiting for his reply.

Everything on the phone screen was a blur until a post of Carson appeared.
It was a mirror selfie with his hair wet and water beads trailing down his bare chest. In one hand was his phone and in the other was a flower; an iris. His eyes sparkled with exhilaration and I realised that he was wearing the same sport shorts as the other day.

My breathing constricted and my chest tightened when I saw the caption.

Danced in the rain with a beautiful flower.

A thunderous tornado had struck my closet, leaving all sorts of clothes, from summer shorts to winter coats and even underwear draped across floors and open drawers. This tornado was named specifically after May who was still frantically digging into a pile of skirts I'd never seen or touched before.

Mother and father had left to visit a friend's house since May was here and able to help me get ready. Apparently her friend was sick or something and she didn't elaborate. I don't think it was serious though.

"Are you excited?" May spun her head around briefly, still keeping her hands on the skirts.

"I guess," I answered quietly, switching my phone in one hand to the other nervously. I was sitting on my bed watching as May tore my closet apart.

The school was hosting a fair at a nearby park to raise money for cancer today. It was an annual thing but I've never been and I was only going because May 'asked' me to go. She obviously believed in a different definition of 'ask' because she demanded I go to help her set up the tent. I was supposed to be studying today but mother let me go, probably because May convinced her.

"I still can't believe he posted that!" May squealed suddenly, her head still buried in the closet. "Like, what even! That's so cute!"

When May came over, she confronted me about Carson's post because she knew it was about me, since it had the word flower in it. I explained everything that actually happened at the meaning behind it and now she was stuck to it like glue and won't stop talking about it.

I rolled my eyes, something I'd never done before until now. "Sam hasn't texted me back yet though." I paused. "Should I text him?"

"No!" May exclaimed, before lowering her voice. "Has he read it?"

I furrowed my brows. "How would you know if someone's read your message?"

"You're kidding." May's jaw dropped and she walked over to me, snatching my phone and sat down beside me.
"What?"

She handed the phone back to me. "Go on the app and get his name out."
I did as she told me to and handed it back to her.

"He hasn't read it yet," May concluded. She paused. "Then again, he could've read it when it popped up on the lock screen, without actually doing into the app." She showed me the screen and using her index finger to point. "See, it doesn't say the word read underneath the message."

"Where?"

She scrolled up. "Sorry for intruding on your messages, I won't see much."

"Don't worry. There's nothing to see, it's all about homework," I mumbled quietly, glancing at the phone.

"See how this has a read word underneath?"

I let out an awe sound. "Oh my god! I never knew that!"

May chuckled and rolled her eyes. "You're welcome. I still need to find you nice clothes."

I nodded as she walked back. 

She fiddled around in there for a minute or two before turning back around. "Time?" she questioned, turning back around and began throwing skirts over her shoulder and they landed on the bed.

"It's almost eight," I replied glancing at the clock on the opposite wall. My eyes followed her every movement as she chucked a few more skirts behind her. We were supposed to arrive at half past eight so I wasn't sure as to why she woke me up at seven just to find clothes.

She pursed her lips, "Shorts should be fine since God has finally granted us the warm summer breeze."

I simply nodded and sat back down on to the bed, watching her shovel out more clothes.

"Oh, this is cute," May held up denim shorts I hadn't worn in two or three years.

I shook my head, "I can't fit that. I wore it when I was fourteen or something. I don't think it will fit me anymore."

She snorted, "How big were your hips when you were fourteen? It would fit you perfectly now."

"It was a bit big a few years back..." I mumbled thoughtfully.

"Good, now you go try that one on while I find a nice top," May instructed and spun back around.
I examined the high waisted shorts carefully, it's harsh fabric tickled as I ran my fingers across the hem. It had three buttons that ran down the middle in the front and there were four large pockets, two at the front and two at the back.

I peeked at May to see if she was looking and found that she was too busy rummaging through the other side of the closet, crinkling all my neatly folded clothes so it was safe for me to try it on.

I unbuttoned the top three buttons and threaded my legs through and pulled it up. That was easy but once they reached my hips, the hard fabric tightened and it took a few hard pulls and a little jumping to get it on. I huffed softly as I fit the hole over the button, making sure it was secure. Then I turned around a faced the mirror, raising my baggy t-shirt up so I could see the whole shorts. I found myself smiling because it actually fit so perfectly.

"See, I told you it would fit," May asserted, walking to stand next to me. "I found this cute top but I don't know about it."

"Can I see it?" I asked.

She handed me a long black t-shirt and plopped herself down on my bed, "It's long so you can tuck it into the skirt, but it's tight so it will hug your torso."

I took it from her and inspected it from top to bottom before concluding, "Let me try it on."
May nodded but didn't move.

"...Can you please turn around?" I asked softly, twirling my index finger in a spinning motion.

She jumped slightly. "Oh, right. Sorry."

Once I was sure she had turned around, I pulled the t-shirt over my head and swapped it with the black top.

When it completely covered my body, I cleared my throat. "Is it okay?"

May turned around and nodded, "Definitely. Now tuck the long bits in."
I did as she told me, pushing the cotton fabric into the denim material before turning around to face the mirror.

She nodded with an accomplished grin on her face. "Perfect."

After that, it was accessories; earrings, shoes and even light makeup. The earrings were simple pearls and the makeup was 'simple' highlights, blush (May joked that I didn't need that since I already blushed twenty four seven), mascara and pink lipstick. I stuck with my usual converse and tied my hair in a loose low ponytail.

"All right, you're ready!" May squealed, shaking both my shoulders.

I smiled gratefully. "Thank you so much."

"You're welcome but don't thank me just yet." May smirked and she had an evil glint in her eyes.

"Why?"

She shrugged, her grin never ceasing and then she changed the subject. "You're obviously meant to be with Carson."

I sighed, sitting down on to the bed, "You need to stop. I may like him but I doubt he likes me." It was an obvious lie but I wasn't about to admit that I liked him.

It was her turn to sigh. "What do you mean, you may like him? You definitely do. Plus, I've been his friend for years and I know when he likes someone," She explained and then the glint in her eyes turned into a bright blazing light. "besides, he tells Jett everything and Jett tells me."

"Wait-- what?" I jolted my head in her direction with my eyes furrowed.

May sat down beside me and patted my shoulder with fake sympathy. "I got to go now. I half regret volunteering to run a booth but I partially don't, for two reasons, one, free candy and two...you'll see later."

I opened my mouth to speak but she cut me off. "Don't worry, I'm forcing Jett to stay with me, so it should be fine. But you guys still need to help me set up the tent. My stupid partner's sick. What an idiot." 

I tried to speak again but May jumped up, grinned at me and walked out the door, leaving me speechless.

Just before she shut the door, her head popped back in, "Make sure to smile and lock the door behind you when you leave. Don't be afraid to hold his hand if he grabs it, because I'm pretty sure both your hands will be sweaty. Don't die and be safe. Kisses!" May blew me a kiss and slammed the door shut.

I breathed out a breath from being startled and then my brows furrowed.

Whose hands?

Then May's head was back, "Oh, I forgot, I have a surprise in about a minute. Don't kill me. Love you!"
Then she shut the door and I heard her pattering footsteps echo down the stairs and the front door slamming.

I just sat there with a slouched back despite all my mother's protest and furrowed my eyebrows. What surprise was May talking about? It couldn't be bad right? It was so brief and the word surprise can mean anything or be anywhere. My hands were already flooding another river while I sat there with resounding thoughts in my head and then the doorbell rang. 

My hands were sweating as my converse hit against the floor and my heart's thumps gradually became louder and faster as I neared the door. I slowly unlocked the knob, twisting it with a shaking hand and pulling the door open inch by inch.

"Carson?"

a/n: vote and comment x