"i doubt you'll be able to"

I shrouded my sweaty fingers together, bit my lip nervously and paced around outside my house. School was over and my steps had dragged behind me like heavy boulders. I stalled as much as I could but I would have to face my mother at some point.

My predicament was a very difficult one to decipher. I either tell my mother the truth about the rumours and I skipped periods one to four or I tell her a...lie; the one Carson told me to. I could already feel guilt flooding through me at just the thought of lying to my mother. She's the one who's looked after and cared for me since the first day my eyes opened. I can't imagine repaying her by lying.

"Should I lie?" I muttered to myself, continuing to trot back and forth, my converse turning from grey to brown because the thing I was trotting in was wet grass and the tips of my jeans were doing something similar. My mother had just bought these jeans for me. They were a bit long since I was short but it fit my waist. "No. Maybe. What would she say? Yes. It's only a little lie-- No. No lying. But I'll get into trouble-- Yes then. No..."

This dragged out for a few more minutes before I shook my head decisively, "It's a only a teensy tiny white lie..." I whispered, trying to persuade myself that it wasn't a bad thing. My hands were bunched into small wet fists that dangled loosely by my sides and my legs quivered as they launched up the steps weakly.

Shakily, taking out my keys from the front pocket of my old bag, I unlocked the door with a click and walked in anxiously. I slowly shut the door behind me, hanging the keys on the hook behind the door. I carelessly slipped off my converse and chucked them on the shoe rack amongst my other soiled shoes.

"Act normal." Carson had instructed me earlier. "That's the whole point of lying. You're not supposed to let people know something has changed or is off. Oh, and don't avoid eye contact, that's what bad liars do. Always maintain a constant and natural stare. Got it?"

It's funny how I'd started from not uttering a single word to anyone to end up having the privilege of being taught how to lie from the popular boy.

"Act normal," I repeated to myself quietly.

Mother was now likely to be either in the spacious lounge room or her sewing room. Textiles was her favourite subject in high school and she continues sewing now, from fixing father's fallen button of his dress shirt or designing a full dress, which would take her months to complete. Unfortunately, I would always be the one modelling for her and I'd end up with at least four needle pricks in my skin despite how experienced mother was.

"Hey mother, what's for dinner?" I shouted as I dropped my bag next to the shoe rack, one of the nearly ripped bag straps got caught on a red flat and pulled it down with it.

"Sushi." I heard her answer. Since she was at home a lot, she had a lot of spare time on her hands and enjoyed experimenting with new recipes from all sorts of different cultures.

I huffed and went to fix it, then following my mother's voice to find her very occupied with her delicate hands firmly situated on each side of the fabric and pushing it into the metal death machine with the needle that could poke my eyes out. Her hair was pulled back into an uneat but practical knotty low bun, rectangular spectacles perched on the bridge of her nose and her eyes squinted unknowingly. The sleeves of her sweater were folded back so they wouldn't tragically suffer by getting caught in the metal death trap.

I was about to walk closer to see what she was doing but she abruptly stopped her sewing and lifted her hand up, keeping her palm flat, motioning a stop sign. "No. It's a surprise. You can't look."

I opened my mouth to protest but she shook her head. "Nope. No buts."

She stood up, pointing to the door. "Please, get out while I clean up."

"I can help," I suggested, plastering an innocent smile on my face.

Mother shot me a deadpan expression so I hurriedly scurried out of the room, closing the door behind me.

A few minutes later, mother walked out, half of her attention was on trying to pick out all the excess thread on her tracksuit pants that must've fallen off the table earlier and stuck to the fabric.

"What type of sushi for dinner?" I asked quietly. I need to start a conversation somehow and slowly bring up the topic. At least, that was what Carson had instructed.

"The usual; sashimi, tuna, fish and chicken rolls, daughter," Mother answered, taking of her glasses and rubbing the glass frames with a small wipe she had kept in her pocket.

"Why daughter?" I questioned confused. Mother never calls me that, she always uses my name.

"Why'd you call me mother before?" She shot back with a raised brow and comprehension hit me as hard as a brick. In the midst of my panic about lying earlier, I had accidentally called her mother when I normally say 'mum'. I'm so stupid. I'm an idiot.

I forced my face to remain the same expression and calm myself down slightly. Always maintain a constant and natural stare, Carson's voice echoed through my brain and I answered with a sheepish smile, "Because I had been reading an old book and the protagonist and all the other characters called their mums, mothers and I had just got used to saying the word in my head so it kind of came out."

"Okay then." Mother shrugged and began walking to the kitchen.

I just lied.

I just lied to my own mother.

I'd lied once before but that was it. What's happening to me? Where did the good girl go? What is Carson doing to me?

I unfolded the nurse's note from my pocket and raced after my mother. It's just a small white lie. It's just a small white lie, I tried convincing myself.

"Mum, I have a note," I announced in a quiet voice as I walked into the kitchen, making sure I called her 'mum' instead of 'mother'.

Mother stopped what she was doing and looked up at me. "An excursion note?"

I shook my head softly. "From the nurse."

"What happened? Did someone trip you? Did you hit your head? Did someone push you? Who was it? A girl or boy. How dare they. I'll go and have a word with the principal," Mother began rambling.

I shook my head swiftly, my eyes widened in panic. "No, no, no, no. You don't have to do that. Please, just read the note. It's nothing like that."

Oh god. I just lied again. Although, technically it is the truth because no one pushed me off the stairs and the note was from the nurse.

"You were sick?"

I nodded.

"Are you all right now?"

I nodded again, not trusting my voice anymore.

"That's good."

"I'm going to call Cooper and tell him about the invitation," I told her and scrambled off as fast as I could, almost tripping up the stairs.

Then I just remembered that I left my bag downstairs with my laptop in it. I snuck down again, taking it up with me. I unpacked my things before face planting on my bed and letting out a breath.

"I promise to myself that I'll never lie again," I said, my voice muffled because of my pillows.

A while later, I flipped the laptop screen open, then clicking on Skype before spamming my dear cousin.

Cooper.

Cooperrrr.

Coopppperrrr.

Cooper. You there?

Cooper?

COOPERINUS!!!

Copernicus.

Argh. Spell check ruined your name. They only know one 'o'.

COOPERNICUS

COOPPPPERRRRRNICCCUSS!!!

I did that for the next minute or two before calling him and ending the call and then repeating.

About two minutes later, he picked up.

"Hey Flower," Cooper greeted, smiling into the camera.

"I just wanted to call to let you know I finished the invitation designs," I explained, taking out my hair from the messy low pony and trying to brush through it with my fingers.

"Thanks, Flower. Can you ask your dad to give it to my dad the next time they meet? I think they're meeting in a few days."

I nodded. "Sure. I hope they're okay. I can redo them if you don't like it."

Cooper shook his head. "Nah, it's fine."

I nodded.

"By the way, Taylor's brother's best friend's moving to your school in a few weeks. His name is Sam, I think it's Sam Drakos. Yeah. From what I heard, he's pretty smart so he'll be in most of your classes," Cooper added, smoothing down his hair. "His whole family is moving, Taylor didn't say and I doubt knows why. But his whole family is coming, he has an older sister and younger sister. I believe she's like six or seven, her name's Suri. His older sister is Sandra and yeah."

"How do you even know this?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Just watch out for the boy. You'll be seeing him a lot more."

"Oh, it's okay. I'm just going to ignore him and I don't think I'll be meeting the younger sister."

"I doubt you'll be able to."

"Why?"

He didn't answer.

Then I heard a beep and there were a few blurry movements from Cooper's screen then it stopped and I saw Cooper concentrating on his laptop screen.

"What are you doing?" I asked suspiciously, leaning my head in my hands, my elbows propped up on the bed and my jean covered legs swinging up and down behind me.

"Texting a mate," he answered briefly as his fingers flew across his computer keyboard.

"Who?"

"A new friend I met at that event I told you about. That fundraiser at the university," Cooper answered.

I nodded in remembrance. "What are you guys talking about?"

"His hopeless love life."

"That's mean," I noted.

"It's true. He tried flirting with the girl he liked and she rejected him every time. She ran away, actually, about several times but then he apologised and now he's friend zoned."

"Poor guy," I said sympathetically. "That girl's probably not thinking right unless the guy's crazy then that's fine."

Cooper looked at me with an unreadable expression and smirked. "I'm sure the girl's just stupid."

I nodded in agreement. 

a/n: who do u think cooper was talking to?
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