Alex

I think the most precious thing I've ever seen in my life is Harry laying on the extra bed in our hospital room, holding our baby to his chest. He stayed awake with her most of the night while I slept unless I had to feed her. The first night went by fine, and even two days later when we were able to go home, everything was great.

We arrived at my parent's house and Harry changed Emery into something softer than the outfit my mom insisted she wears out of the hospital. He was so gentle with her, almost as if she was too tiny to be held.

I sat next to Anne and my mom who watched as he gently pushed the little hair she had on top of her head to the side. He was going to swaddle her when Anne began trying to teach him. “You have to fold the top,” she explained.

“I think we should leave them to learn on their own," my mother spoke up. Anne ignored her and continued to help us as she left the room.

“There you go darling, nice and snug.” Harry held her in his arms and thanked her. “Well, I have to head home so I will see you tomorrow,” she said sadly giving us each a kiss on the top of our heads.

“Thank you, Anne, we’ll see you tomorrow.” she was gone, and it was our turn to take care of another human.

To say I was exhausted was an understatement. My hips, back, legs, and entire lady region hurt. It really didn't help that my mother was constantly judging me about everything I did. It was June, and quite warm, but the baby was used to being in warm temperatures considering she was in my belly for nine months. So, I kept her fully clothed, and she said it was too much. It's not like she was in a parka, I just kept her in her onesie. Besides, we were indoors and my dad always had the air conditioning on.

She also told me I had to be up with Emery, but why would I have to be awake all night when Harry is telling me to get some rest. This was the point of him taking time off of work, to help me with our daughter.

“Are you tired, baby?” Harry asked me, pulling me from my thoughts.

“Aren't you?” he nodded. “Well, she's asleep now so I guess we could nap for a while.” He agreed to take her to her little bassinet and laying her in it. He pulled it towards him and laid back on the bed. We slept for almost two hours, sadly this would be the only solid sleep we would get for the next few weeks.

The energy in the house was very negative within that first week. Emery, like any newborn, had begun a habit of crying whenever she was hungry or needed a change. She didn't like to be naked, which made Harry very happy, so baths and changes had to be quick. The only way she wouldn’t cry is when I would feed her, or when Harry held her.

My parents worked every day and I felt really bad because Emery would cry at night and keep everyone up. Although this continued to happen I didn't think it bothered by parents as much because it was their granddaughter.

Of course, I was wrong.

My sister came to visit while Harry went to pick up his paycheck. We were down in the kitchen having breakfast, my sister asking me how I felt and if I wanted to take a nap. “Amy, you didn't have the baby, so she has to watch her child,” my dad said as he grabbed a cup of coffee. By now I was used to the constant ‘you made your bed, now lay in it’ comments, but they still hurt my feelings.

My mother hadn't helped me one bit, and even though I had Emery, it would still be nice if she acted as she did a few weeks ago.

After my parents left to work, my sister turned to me and raised an eyebrow. “What the hell is their problem? Mom didn't even acknowledge you.” her voice laced with anger. I couldn't get angry, I already felt as if all my crying I did during pregnancy has caused Emery to cry a lot as well.

“It's my fault, I can't get Emery to stop crying at night and they must be tired.” I stood to pick up my plate, but she stopped me to do that for me.

“Yeah Alex, I get that, but for god's sake she's two weeks old and you're a new mom, they could be a little sympathetic,” she argued.

“Yeah but it's my baby, and it's their house-”

“And it's your parents. I mean look at this, suddenly mom has you doing chores.” she walked towards the refrigerator and pulls off a piece of paper. “Clean the stove, dust the house- are you joking? She has always had a cleaning lady come do this and all we had to do was keep our rooms clean and wash dishes. Why is she making you do all this crap now?”

“Because Amy, baby equals adult. I'm lucky she's letting me live here again.” my sister shook her head and sat back down beside me.

“Alex, you know she's doing this in hopes you leave.” I scoffed.

“Amy, you go to college and have a job and can do shit outside of the house. I have a baby and no job or money for college because I didn't think I would have to take care of a baby. I thought I had time, and I don't. I should have planned better, and now I'm stuck here until I get my shit together.” she shook her head. “Mom is trying to teach me that in life no one is going to be easy on you.”

“So you think your mom would cut you some slack.” I knew she was right, but instead of arguing I stood up and took Emery to the room with me. “Alex, come on.” I had been very emotional since giving birth and was crying a lot. Now I was crying because Amy was right.

A couple of more days went by when Harry's dad and sister were planning on coming over. I showered and got dressed, feeling more like myself compared to the mom I had become. I did my hair while Harry sat on the bed with Emery, reading her a Dr. Seuss book. “ I do not like green eggs and ham, I do not like them, Sam, I am. See baby, he doesn't like green eggs and ham,” he spoke in a baby voice. “I feel like this book is showing kids that it's okay to peer pressure other people. Like ‘yeah eat these mysterious green eggs with a fox’ um drugs, hello.”

I let out a laugh at his joke and came over to sit beside him and cuddle with Emery and him. When she wasn't crying, she was the most precious baby. Her grey eyes were beginning to turn blue which according to the doctor could become green or stay blue, but it was very unlikely they would turn as dark as mine. Her hair was still very light, like a light brown, dirty blonde color.

Today her daddy decided to put on a cute little-knitted hat, matching booties, and mittens. “It's too warm for that Harry.” he pouted.

“Can you at least take a photo of us?” he smiled, lifting her up to press her against his cheek. I took a photo on his phone and he smiled big, setting it as his home screen. “Don't worry, I still have you as my lock screen.” he winked at me.

“Oh gosh, I was so worried,” I said sarcastically.

He tugged me down onto the bed and pressed a kiss to my lips. I heard the baby begin making noises so we pulled away and laid her on the bed to stretch a bit.

“Your mum is alright with my family coming over right?” I shrugged. “Should we ask her? She's been acting a bit...uh-” he stopped looking down.

“A bit what?”

“Just, rude I guess.” I looked down and knew he was right. “I mean I'm sure she means well, baby-”

“No, you're right, she's just been so mean and constantly telling me I'm a bad mom-” my voice broke and Harry quickly came over to kneel in front of me.

“Please don't cry, you just did your pretty makeup.” he used his shirt to dab my tears away. “You're a great mum, the best a baby could ask for.” he held me close and tried to comfort me the best way Harry knew how. “Sweet angel baby.” he began leaving kisses all over my face.

Harry

I was tired and a bit frustrated to say the least. Obviously, I didn't push a baby out of me, but I imagine you must feel like trash after you do. Alex's mum was beginning to piss me off, but I knew I couldn't say anything to her. But why would she invite us here if she wasn't actually going to help us? I'm not saying to take care of the baby, but at least don't be a...bitch about it.

That's right I said it.

I wanted to talk to my mum about the whole situation, but I knew my mum well and knew she would take action if she realized what was going on.

We came over after Emery turned three weeks. She was beautiful, a perfect mixture of myself and Alex. It's almost like she got all our best features. She was only happy in my arms, in my mum's arms, or on Alex's boobs.

Same.

“Oh, darling you look exhausted, go lay down for a while so grandma can spend time with Emery.” Alex wasn't in the mood to disagree and quickly thanked her, walking to my bedroom to lay down.

“I'll be there in a minute,” I told her as she left.

I watched as my mum put Emery in a swing, and turned on the vibration. She looked through the diaper bag and smiled because of all the clothes Alex had in there, were gifts from my mum. “How are you feeling?” she asked me. I tried to keep my cool, but being sleep deprived and absolutely over the bullshit, I snapped.

“I can't live there with that woman. She's driving me insane.”

“Who, Alex?” she said genuinely confused.

“No, her mother. Everything is a problem. The baby cries and she's mad. She left a bottle on the sink and she's mad. She's constantly criticizing Alex when honestly, Alex is doing the best she can.” I ran my fingers through my hair. “don't get me started on the bullshit chores, I should have stayed here, at least here I'm not judged for not wearing a shirt to have skin to skin with my daughter.”

My mum pulled a chair out and sat down in front of me. “Talk to Alex, come live with me. It's only going to get worse if you begin school and Alex starts online classes or begins working. I can watch the baby when both of you are busy, Harry.” I nodded. “I know she doesn't want to leave because she feels like she needs her mother, but the tension and passive-aggressiveness in the house will only make it worse over time.”

“She yelled over the milk.” I suddenly mumbled as I laid my head in my hands.

“What?”

“The milk, I left the cap off one morning and she yelled and woke up the baby.” my mum made a face and sighed.

“I should have fought that woman when I had the chance.”

“What?” I raised my head.

“Nothing, you're sleep-deprived, go to bed.” I thanked her and went to my bedroom where Alex was already passed out. I went over and laid beside her, pushing her slightly towards the other side. She snuggled up to me and swung her leg over my body.

“I love you,” she mumbled.

“I love you too.” We really had to talk.

Thanks for reading. Xx

-k