Hi we pity you with the cliffhanger we just left you on (chapter 21) so we figured we'd reduce you to tears again for funsies.

Major spoilers for chapters up to 19. Don't read unless you've read at least up to there.

Written by Ref (food_is_my_jam) with a lot of help from Silver (SilverBeams).

For some context, this takes place with the Voc, the rebel group Aidyn was a part of. Remember Dalia from chapter 14? Well Birk is her boyfriend.

Here you go.

When Dalia first disappeared, Birk figured it was just a routine thing. A night mission dragged out over a few days, or something unexpected like that — if she'd known in advance she would have warned him. The first day, he figured she'd be back soon. The second, he was dragged out for a recon mission first thing in the morning, without a chance to see whether she'd gotten back. He returned late that night, heard she was still gone, forced himself not to think about it. The Voc had plenty of long missions. Faraway ones. She was fine.

By the third day, he was worried.

"What's with the long face, Sticky?" Lyla's voice drawled from behind where he was slumped at a table. "Worried about your girlfriend? I'm sure she's fine."

Birk turned to see the caela balancing a tray piled with bagels, foot tapping erratically against the ground. It took a moment for her obvious impatience to register. "Are you going to invite me to sit down or what? I'm about to drop these bagels."

"Sit wherever you want," Birk said sullenly, hiding his surprise. He and Lyla were friends, sort of, but they'd never actually spent much time together.

With a loud clatter, Lyla and her bagels plopped down beside him.

Awkward, one-sided-bagel-nomming silence ensued.

"Soooo... do you want me to get your mind off it?" Lyla asked carefully, once a moment or two of silent chewing had passed and she realized Birk was decidedly not going to initiate conversation.

"Not particularly," Birk muttered, avoiding Lyla's gaze.

"Riiiight."

Birk knew he should be nicer. Lyla was trying — and Lyla was good, as far as Voc members went — but... she wasn't Dalia. And, yeah. Dalia was probably fine. He knew he was overreacting.

But it wasn't like her not to warn him she'd be gone for a while. And Ryne was always careful about giving notice before long missions.

"Hey Lyla, can I have one of your bagels thank you byee!"

Startled from his brooding, Birk glanced up to see Nori disappearing with one of Lyla's bagels clutched in her hand.

Lyla stood straight up, chair screeching as it skidded against the floor behind her. "NORI."

"Oh, come on!" the blue-skinned rana called. "You have like ten!"

"SEVEN. I HAVE SEVEN AND NOW I HAVE SIX," Lyla seethed, shoving the remaining bagels toward Birk and flapping into the air, ignoring the attention she had begun to garner from Voc members around the room. "YOU ARE IN FOR IT, NOR — "

"HEY! No flying in the cafeteria!" barked a familiar-but-unwanted voice from a few tables away. "Elanor, give Lyla back her bagel."

"Okay! Jeez!" Nori jogged toward Lyla, shooting Lusan a dirty look. "Sorry, Ly."

Rolling her eyes, Lyla lowered back to the ground, accepting Nori's outstretched bagel. "It's fine. Lusan."

"Just trying to keep some order around here," Lusan said stiffly, before returning to his English muffin.

"What a tide bringer," Lyla muttered, sitting back down and grabbing her bagel-tray back from Birk. "When did he even get back? I thought we were finally rid of him for a while."

"Few days ago," Nori replied, perching beside Lyla uninvited and tearing off some of a bagel before the caela could protest. She stuffed it in her mouth and continued speaking. "He was all secretive, too — I heard him begging Ryne to send someone to New Earth. He must have majorly botched recruitment."

"Sounds like him," Lyla snorted. "Ryne didn't just send him back himself?"

"Nope, he insisted. Tide bringer. I think they sent Dalia instead."

"Uh, right? He's literally the dictionary definition of tide — "

Birk stood up abruptly, chair crashing to the ground. "Lusan sent Dalia to New Earth?"

"Uh, yeah." Caught off guard, Nori stared up at him for a second. "I mean, it wasn't just Lusan. Ryne was a part of it. She was super mad at him, it was great."

"I don't care!" Birk lowered his voice to a hiss and leaned toward the others, ignoring the stares he was getting around the room. "Dalia does not pass for human. I can't believe Ryne would send her like that to New Earth! Of all the places — "

"Whoa, chill," Lyla interrupted. "It's only been — what, three days? If Dalia's doing a mission there she shouldn't even be back for a few, Sticky. It'll be fine."

"That tide bringer," Birk spat, reaching up a hand to brush his leaf-strewn hair out of his eyes. "I swear to the moons, I will murder him — "

Lyla stood up and grabbed his shoulder, attempting to shake him but instead almost falling over herself. "Altarbe, why are fabri so giant?" She straightened up — Birk still managing to be a head taller — and restarted. "Birk. As much as we would all love for you to murder Lusan, this is a catastrophically terrible idea. And I'm friends with Aidyn Munsif."

Birk inhaled sharply. "Lyla, if he put Dalia in danger — "

"Dalia can take care of herself," Nori chimed in from across the table. "She'd probably be pissed you didn't believe in her, dude."

As much as Birk hated to admit it, the rana was right. And it was the thought of Dalia's reaction that finally convinced him to sit back down, still simmering as his companions returned to their bagels and chatter.

I'll give it a week. If she's not back in a week, that tide bringer is going to pay.

｡･ﾟﾟ･｡

Lusan bit into a chewy, lukewarm English muffin, trying to block the memories the single action ignited out of his mind. Will would have loved an English muffin like this...

No thinking about Will, Lus.

Still, he knew her. She loved English muffins. (Actually, he had no idea what her preferred breakfast bread was, but since they were so completely and utterly on the same wavelength he just assumed.) Maybe he should stick to bagels just to spite her.

As if. Bagels were disgusting.

He chewed the English muffin with relish — take that, Will, one less English muffin for you to devour the way you have my heart — before loud, thumping footsteps shocked him into the current moment.

"BIRK, ARE YOU SERIOUSLY — "

Birk Reed rounded the corner, dark eyes lighting up when he saw Lusan. "You tide bringer," he growled, racing toward the holder of the muffin.

"Hoold up, I think there's been a misunder — "

And then Lusan was. Swept. Off his feet. He was literally swept off of his feet and one of his flip-flops fell on the ground and he could feel his toes wiggling around in the air looking for the lost flip-flop. So that was a letdown for his foot. And now his foot was cold. Also, he had literally been swooped into the air, which was not remotely comfortable in any, way, shape, or form.

"I SWEAR TO THE MOONS, WHAT IN THE TIDES DID YOU DO TO DALIA? YOU ABSOLUTE INGR — "

"Birk, what are you doing?" Lyla Amaranth shouted, flying into the little hallway and attempting to tug Lusan away from the faber hibri. "Are you insane?"

Birk's grip on Lusan's shoulder tightened. "IT'S BEEN A WEEK, LYLA, AND SHE'S STILL NOT BACK. WHAT IF — " His voice faded into a hoarse, harsh choking noise Lusan was vaguely sure was a sob. What the hell was going on? "WHAT IF..."

Taking his best guess at the situation, Lusan attempted to be soothing. "Look, man — tree? — I've been through my fair share of rejection. I know it hurts at fir — "

And then Lusan was being pummelled with variously aimed punches as Birk screamed incoherently and Lyla cursed and yelled something sounding vaguely like "BACKUP I NEED BACKUP."

Lusan slid to the ground, face-planting into an uncomfortable plasticky material that on reflection was probably his missing flip-flop. This was almost as painful as Will's rejection...

He felt his senses dull as shouting ensued over his head.

"OH MY MOONS BIRK WHAT — "

...

"DAMON THANK THE MOONS PLEASE HELP — "

...

"WHAT IF HE KILLED HER LYLA WHAT IF SHE'S DEAD"

... ...

"I'LL HEAL HIM DAMON DON'T WORRY..."

...

"I GUESS THAT I" ... "CAN TALK TO BIRK" ...

...

｡･ﾟﾟ･｡

Dalia was going to come back.

Birk turned it into a mental mantra as Damon led him down the hall. She's going to come back. She's going to come back. She's okay she's okay she's okay she's okay she's going to come back. She has to come back.

"Birk. Birk, stop. You're freaking me out."

Dragged back to reality by the sound of Damon's voice, Birk glanced around the hallway, eyes narrowing when he noticed the empty classroom Damon appeared to be directing him toward. "What are you doing?" he asked warily, voice hoarse from the shouting earlier.

"Do you want to talk about what just happened?" Damon asked, nodding his head toward the aforementioned classroom.

"Nope." Birk shook his head, attempting to clear it. Talking about this was the last thing he needed.

Damon grinned back at him, undeterred. "Great. But, you're gonna be in big trouble when they find you, so you might actually want to give this talking thing a try first." A pause, and then a whispered, "I brought bagels."

"Don't care," Birk muttered. She's okay she's okay she's okay she's okay —

Damon began tapping his foot against the ground at even intervals, moons-damned beam still pasted to his face. "I have all day."

Clenching his teeth, Birk swallowed his pride and stalked into the room, Damon trotting behind him. Better to get it over with.

Damon plopped down onto an empty table, gesturing for Birk to do the same, but the hibri remained standing — the table would probably capsize with his weight, not that Damon needed to know that. "So..." the would-be-therapist attempted, word hanging hopefully in the air before drifting away. Birk noticed almost absently how forlorn the lone syllable sounded as it slid past; Dalia would've done something to make it feel better.

Moons, what was he thinking? It was a word. Words did not have feelings. Trees did. And, like, birds and stuff.

"Okay, since you won't start, I will... what just happened?" Damon asked carefully.

"Nothing," Birk replied in a monotone, focusing his attention stubbornly away from the caela hibri.

Damon took a deep breath, possibly anticipating being attacked by a sentient half-tree. "Look, if you don't talk about this these outbursts are just... they're just going to get worse. And you don't want Dalia to see you like this when she comes back, Birk."

Birk stiffened, the words stumbling out before he could rein them in. "She's not going to come back."

Damon swallowed, clearly unsure of how to continue. "That's — "

"Dalia isn't going to come back, Damon." Now that the floodgates were open, it was impossible for Birk to close them — he'd just have to make sure he didn't drown in his own words. "It's too dangerous. She doesn't pass for human. She has clawed feet and can barely hide her wings and that's what the humans do there. They kill hibri. It's a moons-damned sport. And I need to find her, Damon. But I can't go to New Earth." He took a sharp breath, words piling up inside of him. "And it's all that tide bringer Lusan's fault. And everyone says Dalia is going to be okay but she's not she's not she's dead, she's going to die and nobody told me, they didn't think to tell me! And I need to find her but I can't go look because it's too dangerous. And nobody understands what this feels like. It's like I'm just sitting around doing nothing while — while the person I love is in danger — "

And then he realized Damon was laughing — a small, helpless sound. "I'm sorry," he choked out, "but I think you've managed to score the one person here who really does understand."

Birk stiffened, mouth shutting abruptly. More words swirled through his mind — coming dangerously close to being spoken — but he swallowed, resisting the urge to speak. Damon didn't get to hear this, because Damon didn't know what it was like. He didn't get to pretend this was about him. This wasn't about him.

Taking a deep breath, Birk forced his mouth back open, new sentences forming. "Right, you're definitely entitled to pretending this is your problem."

"Oh moons." Damon looked genuinely surprised at Birk's anger. "I didn't mean — "

"Forget it," Birk snapped, rage simmering as he started toward the door. "I already told you, I don't need to talk."

He tugged open the door and stepped into the hallway, hands clenched into fists. That tide bringer. Birk couldn't believe he'd actually-kind-of-opened-up to him.

"Aidyn thinks I'm dead."

Birk swung around to see Damon standing directly behind him, sadness flooding the caela-human hibri's features. "Sorry. I don't mean to make this about me, and I know you already know about all this. But it's obvious you don't want to talk right now — or at least, you're not going to — and Lyla doesn't understand, so I figured... you know, I'd take this opportunity to talk to someone who does."

Birk didn't quite know what to say. They were friends, sure, but Birk mainly knew him through Dalia, and they'd certainly never shared anything like this before. Damon had always seemed like a happy, go-with-the-flow kind of person, not someone who was capable of sounding... well, about as vulnerable as Birk himself was feeling.

But Birk knew Dalia wasn't coming back. No matter what anyone told him, he knew it. Somewhere, deep down. And Damon was one of Dalia's friends — he was someone she cared about, had cared about. And so maybe, just by listening to what he was about to say, Birk was one step closer proving to Dalia and himself that he could still be there for her... even if she'd never know it.

So, he resisted the urge to cross his arms, hoping Damon would understand what was happening. Luckily, he seemed to.

"Aidyn thinks I died, so he left the Voc. He left to find the patria sources, even though Ryne told us we're not going to search for them. He told Lyla it's what I would've wanted." Damon took a sharp breath, letting his words hang in the air for a moment before continuing. "That's not what I want. I want him to be safe, and if he'd stopped to think for even a moment, he'd realize that. But now he's moons-know-where, on some ridiculous mission where he's risking his life — and, again, he thinks I'm dead, which is just great because moons know how reckless he gets when he's upset." Now he made shaky eye contact with Birk, who was standing stiffly, still unsure of what to do. "I know it's not the same. But I — I care about Aidyn. A lot. All I want to do is find him, make sure he's okay, and I can't. He could be anywhere, but, as Lyla forced me to realize... getting myself into trouble won't help anything."

Birk's hands inadvertently squeezed even tighter, fingernails digging into his rough, bark-like skin. "I know where she is, Damon. She's in New Earth. She's right there, three days away. I could go. I could — " and now, to his horror, he let out a small sob " — I could find her. I could save her."

"Birk, you can't," Damon said, voice surprisingly firm. "You can't put yourself in danger like that."

"But she's — "

"But you can't."

"But — "

And then Damon leaned forward and hugged him.

Birk stood frozen for a second, heart racing as he debated whether to shove Damon back or just wait for it to be over. He realized distantly that he was shaking, small sobs heaving through his body. If Dalia was here — but she wasn't, she wasn't here, she was gone somewhere and he couldn't even look for her. And Damon was attempting to pat his back but couldn't even reach it and Dalia was gone.

And somehow, he found himself leaning into Damon's hug. Which caused Damon to fall over sideways, and then Birk was just sort of standing there with his arms hugging an invisible space.

And then Damon stood back up and hugged him again.

And kept hugging him.

And saying "bro" in this choked-up voice like he was crying too.

Then he heard footsteps. And Nori's voice saying, "Oh my moons." And Lyla shushing her.

At which point he immediately let go of Damon and backed away because what in the tides was he doing —

"No no keep bro-hugging guys that was adorable," Nori screeched from the corner. Birk turned to see Lyla physically dragging her away.

And then they were alone again, and Damon was wiping away tears and mumbling incoherent apologies about how he just thought Birk needed a good hug, and hell he could use one too, and something — some otherworldly force Birk would later vehemently deny — compelled the faber hibri to step forward and hug Damon again. And Birk was crying and Damon was crying and Dalia wasn't going to come back and Nori was probably going to tell everyone about this but for just a second — a split second — none of that mattered.

For the tiniest of moments, it was all going to be okay.

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Heyyyy, it's Ref. I hope you liked the oneshot! Since writing it, I've gone further into Lusan's character, and this is a disclaimer that the Lusan POV here is definitely not Lusan. Consider his voice not canon. Everything else is. Thanks! -Ref