XXXIII. WE DIDN'T START THE FIRE

Sirene Black was exhausted. She was tired of her feelings being messed up, she was tired of feeling numb at the most random moments, she wanted to go back to the way she used to be when she was twelve. She was open, she was carefree and she certainly wasn't the disaster she is now.

It's funny how she peaked at age twelve and it's all just been going downhill ever since.

She stared at the letter in hands with fire in her belly, how dare him? How fucking dare him? He thinks he has the right to just order her around like that? She was going to prove him how wrong he was and it wasn't going to be subtle. It was going to be a slap in the face.

Daughter,
I have recently heard about your mother kicking you out of the house without my input, I am utterly disappointed with both of you. What caused such a rash decision? I hope we can mend our relationship over tea this weekend at Three Broomsticks, the private room on the second floor. I want you to bring honor to our family, the reputation of the most noble and ancient house of Black will not be tarnished because of stupid women fighting. You will marry into a respectable pureblood family and serve the dark lord. Write back to me as soon as you can.
From,
Orion Black.

For now she simply watched the flames consume the letter entirely, leaving its ashes behind.

    She couldn't believe her father, he had the audacity to give her orders and tell her what to do after everything he put her and her siblings through as a kid, as miserable as she is right now without a proper home - she wasn't delusional.

She knew there would be no mending because there was never a relationship to begin with - it was a formality for them to raise their kids, just so they could show them off. For years the twins and Regulus were just trophies to show off, when they were still agreeing to their parents, that is of course, the kind of trophies that you keep in a showcase just to take out occasionally and then put them right back when you're done.

    It was suffocating.

    Even though they occasionally got out, they were still in a glass case, their every move was being watched. They couldn't afford to mess up, they couldn't step away. Until they did, and man it was absolutely electrifying. Sirene remembers the first time she said no to her mother, and then her father and then she started living on her own terms. As much as she could anyway.

    She slowly started to become her own person, and Sirius played a huge part in that, without Sirius she doubted she could've managed even the first few years like she did. Oh, how she missed him.

   She hated to admit it but she did, the only constant in her life was Sirius, he was always there - he was her twin but most importantly, he was her her soulmate. He knew her from inside and out, he knew when she felt sad, happy, confused and all he ever needed to do was look at her.

    She hated her parents because if it wasn't for them, they probably would've been talking to each other right now.

   These past few months have been absolutely terrible for Sirene, she found herself slowly becoming distant to everyone around her, she wasn't doing it on purpose - it was just happening, and she didn't know how to stop. Sirene Black was spiraling into some dark hole and she had no anchor to pull her up this time.

🥀

    "Hey" Sirene heard Madam Rosmerta say as she gave her another glass of butterbeer, "You ok, kid?"

    "Yeah" Sirene said forcing a smile, "Of course, Rosie"

    Madam Rosmerta gave her a smile before walking back to the bar leaving Sirene alone at the table, it wasn't exactly a Hogsmeade weekend, Sirene had snuck out to clear her head - she chose the noisiest place in the whole village - Three Broomsticks.

    Sirene looked at the butterbeer in her hand - no extra foam. Regardless she chugged it down and then started playing with the rings on her hand.

    "Hey" Sirene heard a soft voice say and then a chair pulling up beside her, she looked up to find Arielle Rosier sitting next to her with a warm smile, "I'm Arielle"

    "I know" Sirene said keeping her face blank of any emotions, though she didn't have to try hard to do it today, "Andrew talks about you a lot"

    "Little fucker is talking shit about me, isn't he?" Arielle said with an annoyed voice, "He always does that"

    "I assure you" Sirene chuckled at the dramatic antics of the Rosier girl, the ones similar to her brother's, "It's nothing but compliments, he speaks very highly of you"

    "Huh" Arielle's mouth formed an 'o' as she stared at Sirene in shock, "That's surprising"

    "Why?" Sirene asked trying to distract herself.

    "We just don't have that sort of siblingship, I guess" Arielle shrugged, "We're always bickering and most of the times - he's being an absolute arse"

    "Siblingship?" Sirene asked the girl with her brows furrowed, "What's that?"

    "It's a word we came up with" Arielle spoke with a sparkle in her eyes, it's a Rosier thing from what Sirene's noticed, it happens when they speak of something they love, "We both hated the word relationship as a kid for some reason - mainly because we connected it with dating - and were grossed out by it, so we made a new word, siblingship. It means the relationship -ach- between siblings"

    "That's random" Sirene said bluntly as the brunette shrugged, "Do you want a butterbeer? It'll be on me"

    "No, it's absolutely fine" Arielle protested her eyes widening as she watched Sirene get up with her hands in her pocket.

    "Nonsense" Sirene said rolling her eyes, "I'll get you two, perhaps you can share it with that boy who's been eyeing you since you stepped in"

    Arielle turned around with a frown on her face that melted away when she saw the boy choke on his butterbeer, surprised that she'd noticed him. Sirene merely winked at her and then said, "If your brother asks, I didn't see you here"

    Arielle gave her a sheepish smile before turning her attention back to the boy who waved shyly at her. Sirene walked away with her hands in her pocket and one thought in her head - she had to talk to Sirius.

    With that she made her way back to Hogwarts and squeezed through the statue so she could take the passage back to the Gryffindor tower. She quickly said the password avoiding the Fat Lady who was dying to have a conversation with anyone, and Sirene could tell because the Fat Lady absolutely hated her guts.

    She found her friends scattered across the common room - Remus and Peter playing a serious game of wizard chess from what Sirene could tell, Lily and James studying together - which Sirene was definitely going to tease her about - and then Marlene and Alice playing exploding snaps.

    She hadn't realized how much she'd missed their stupid faces until she was looking at them. Sirius wasn't there. She felt the smallest of smiles on her face drop before she decided to ask James about his whereabouts.

    "James" Sirene said startling the two teenagers who seemed to be deep in thoughts before Lily looked up at her with tears in her eyes.

   Damn, you fucked up bad kid.

    You think I don't know that?

    No, no, I know you know, doesn't mean I won't make you feel guilty about it.

    "Hey, Lils" Sirene said in a soft voice giving her best friend a small smile, "Do you know where Sirius is? It's important"

    "I- erm- uh" James stumbled over his words until Lily gave him a slight push, "He's either at the astronomy tower or with Neveah"

    "Alright" Sirene nodded at him, "Thank you, Prongs"

    "The nickname" James said with a huge grin on his face, "No problem, Frostie!"

    "Frostie?" Lily mouthed to Sirene with a confused expression on her face to which Sirene just shrugged.

    "I'll see you later!" Sirene said from over her shoulder as she ran out of the potrait hole.

    "Did she just talk to us?" Lily asked James who looked at her with a bright smile.

    "Couldn't resist our charm" He said smugly leaning back into his seat before he was met with a book slamming on his head.

    "She's back" Marlene said to Alice who smiled back at the blonde, "Thank Merlin, it was weird not waking up to Lily and Si fighting like cats and dogs"

    "It sure was" Alice said with a dreamy tone, "Yesterday I tried to wake her up and she just got up without any prostests, I almost pinched myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming"

    "Checkmate" Remus said to Peter smiling triumphantly.

There, emo Sirene is gone, it is going to be a tad bit more serious now considering it's their last year in a few chapters and then they'll be part of the order, I also want her in a relationship - it won't be the main focus tho, it's just something there that's pleasant. So yeah, that's all. Have a great day!!!