Rose was seventeen and utterly fucked by the world.

      For once, she didn't care about all the parties she was invited to or how many magazines wanted to get her on the front page. She was seventeen, on top of the world, and yet the world utterly failed her.

       After the abortion she had, she stopped making fashion designs despite it being her favorite thing in the world to do. Her mind felt heavy inside her head with a million little thoughts.

         Should she have kept the baby? Did she do the right thing? And who was she anymore if not defined by her own tragedy?

          She could hardly sleep anymore without nightmares. She'd wake up in a panic thinking of unwanted hands on her skin, of touches she was forced to endure. She kept thinking of the night her world fell apart.
 
             She needed something to put it back together. She supposed that's why she ended up here at this restaurant in the middle of the night because she was desperate to live in a world beside her own.

She was here to meet Jack.

After meeting him, she texted and called him many times. Once she even called him in the middle of the night after a nightmare and he stayed up talking to her telling her jokes until she felt safe enough from the horrors in her mind to fall back asleep.

She learned he was nineteen. His family owned a string of restaurants which made him love cooking; he even won a number of cooking competitions.

But right now all she needed to know about him was that he didn't exist in the same world that she did. He didn't and it made him her safe zone; a place to land when she could not find her wings.

"You came," she noted with bright eyes as he sat down across from her. She didn't actually expect him to come when she texted him at two in the morning.

He cocked his head at her before giving her that boyish smile she started to adore, "Why would I not?"

She shrugged before he took note of the black circles under her eyes that made him frown, "You want to talk about it?"

"No," she said solemnly before she took a sip of the milkshake she had already ordered before he got here.

It was silent for a moment as he tried to devise ways to cheer her up before he scratched his head nervously, "I, uh, devised a new recipe that I could make for you."

"Yeah?" her lips upturned slightly.

"Yeah," he said as he stood up from his seat. "Come on."

"Wait, you want to make it now?" she asked.

"Yes," he smiled and she quickly got out of the seat before grabbing her milkshake.

He grabbed her free hand once she did (which made her hand tingle like sparks) and pulled her along with him to the kitchen. His family owned one of these restaurants so he could do what he wanted. Plus, only drinks were being served at his hour since it was so late and the kitchen was empty.

"I've been working on this one for a couple of weeks," he said as he dropped her hand to go fetch ingredients and pots. She watched him go around the kitchen while she sipped on her milkshake. "I like to call it fruity pepper chicken."

"Fruity with chicken?" she raised her eyebrows.

He glanced at her and he shook his head at her with a small smile, "You have absolutely no faith in me, do you?"

"No," she said in amusement.

"Don't worry, you will," he said as he set a pan on the stove. "I'll make you a believer. This will be the best thing you've ever tasted until, well, I make you something else."

"Oh, so we'll be meeting again then?" she smiled.

"I just assumed but I mean if you don't..." he frowned before he looked up at her from what he was doing to see her smiling. "Oh."

"Of course I do, silly," she assured and he smiled widely.

Then he turned his head back to the creation he was in the process of making. He had a smile as he explained each part of the process as he went along making it. She actually quite enjoyed learning about it. It let her brain get lost.

Now, mostly everything was done. They just had to let the creamy sauce simmer before dumping the chicken in. It was an orange pineapple pepper sauce. She was ever so curious and she dipped her finger into it to taste. She was about to bring it to her mouth when he protested.

His eyes widened, "No, don't. You have to let the flavors blend or it won't taste right."

"Are you...serious? I can't taste it yet."

"It's like a cooking rule."

She giggled, "I'm pretty sure it's not a rule."

"Okay, so it's my rule."

She giggled again before she took a napkin and wiped the sauce from her finger. She looked at him in amusement, "There. I'll wait."

"Trust me, it'll be worth it," he said as they stood side by side waiting for the ten minutes to be up.

She chuckled again as they waited, "You were so serious."

His cheeks reddened, "It's my life's passion. I can't help it."

"I get it," she stated. She was the same way about drawing her designs; things had to be a particular way. "With the drawing, you know."

He nodded and things delved into a silence. But after a moment she leaned against him and rested her head against his shoulder as she uttered quietly, "Thank you."

Thank you for keeping me from thinking about my own world, she thought. Thank you for everything. Thank you for always being there. There were a million things she was saying just by saying two words.

"Well, I'm here," he scratched his head nervously. "I mean, you need only call and I'll be wherever you are, Rose."

"I need only call, uh?"

"Or a text. That works, too."

She chuckled before she glanced up at him, "Don't be too good for me, Jack."

"But I want to be."

She couldn't help but smile widely as the ten minutes was up (learning the recipe was, indeed, really good) and butterflies invaded her stomach. She usually had a poker face worn wherever she went but with Jack, none needed to exist.

           _____

               Rose started to draw again. She started to make designs as she kept in contact with Jack. Although, she still had nightmares where sometimes she would wake with a scream. Her father had enough.

         "What's wrong with you?" he asked one morning as they sat for breakfast at the dining table.

            "Nothing," she looked away.

           "Nothing? If it were nothing, I would be a well-rested CEO but that's not fucking happening," he said. "So, out with it. What is it?"

            "I don't want to talk about it," she said quietly before she spoke a bit louder but she still avoided eye contact. "But I'm going to visit Connor for a week at the ranch. I think being away from the city for a couple of days will be good for me."

           "Connor?" Logan narrowed his eyes at his daughter. She had the same icy blue eyes and he could never read her; not when she didn't want to be. "If you think it'll help then fine, visit your brother."

           She smiled a bit secretly, "Thanks."

           Although, she was visiting Connor to get away from the city that was so overwhelming. She was also going because Jack was going to be at a cooking competition in New Mexico and she told him that she'd be there. She felt giddy just at the thought of seeing him again.

            _____

         She was in New Mexico and she was at the competition with Connor. It was sort of like a fair and it was all very exciting for her as she kept searching for Jack in the crowds.

         "Who are you searching for?" Connor asked.

          "No one," she immediately averted her eyes to the ground.

            "Yeah, okay, kid," he chuckled as he wrapped an arm around her. "You can't fool me."

             She was about to answer when she heard her name being shouted through the crowds. She immediately whipped her head in the direction to see Jack heading towards her with his boyish smile.

             "Jack," she smiled.

             "You made it."

              "I did say I would," she said before she remembered her brother was right next to her. "Jack, this is my brother...."

            "Connor," he held his hand out to shake and Jack shook it. "Nice handshake."

         "Now, please, don't get on any boats together you two," Connor frowned. "Your names jinx it."

                Jack chuckled as Rose gave her brother a look, "We're not getting on a boat, Con."

              "Okay, good, because I feel like that would be bad."

           Rose shook her head before looking at Jack, "Doesn't your competition start in a minute?"

           "Yeah, but I had to give you something," he smiled nervously as he pulled his one hand he kept behind his back to reveal a box of chocolates. "I made them myself."

            She smiled in awe as she took it, "Thanks."

             "I'll see you after?" he asked and she nodded.

            "Good. Okay," he swallowed as he started to walk backwards. "See you after."

             She looked down at the box of chocolates and opened it. They were chocolates in the shape of hearts. She beamed as she looked up at Connor, "They're hearts."

    Connor chuckled before he joked, "You could say he hearts you."

         "Connor!" she blushed deeply.

____

Rose was back in New York.

It was currently her birthday and her father had tried to say she wasn't ready for her company. He wanted her to wait a couple of more years before taking it over. She wasn't having any of that as she strong-armed him.

"If you won't sign over my company, then I won't make any more designs," she crossed her arms.

"That's quite extreme, Rosebud," her father said. "Profits would crash. You don't want that, do you?"

"It's not my company yet so I suppose it's not my problem," she said before she gathered her stuff. "Also, I'm moving out."

"You're what?" Logan stated. "Who said you could? I don't think you're ready for that."

"I'm eighteen. I don't need your permission," she said before she started to leave his study that her siblings were eavesdropping from the hallway. "And until I get my company, we don't have anything to talk about."

Logan grumbled as she made her way to the door of his study. She stopped and hesitantly turned, "Oh, and thanks for the birthday party."

She gave a killer smile before she left. Roman clapped a bit as she made her way to the elevator with her siblings following her, "Wow, look who gained some balls."

She shook her head before Kendall, "You're really going to leave? Right now? I mean, Dad..."

She gained a steely gaze, "Dad knows what he needs to do. Until then, he can bleed money."

"Wow," Shiv held a small almost unnoticeable smirk. "I guess you're not the favorite anymore."

"Guess not," she shrugged and let the elevator doors close. She knew her father would be calling her within a week.

He always did; knowing that she wouldn't come back unlike her siblings that would beg for his approval. Logan felt a bit proud that she was too strong, too unyielding to ever bow down.

          _____

         After her disastrous birthday party, she went to see Jack. It was late at night and they went to a park that wasn't well known so the public wouldn't recognize her.

          She'd been looking up at the stars before his soft (soft: the thing she needed more than anything) voice interrupted her, "Happy Birthday."

         She looked at him to find him holding out a red velvet cupcake with a lit candle. She smiled as he spoke, "Make a wish."

         She stared at him, already knowing what she was going to wish for, before she closed her eyes for a moment hoping it would come true. Then she opened them and right before she went to blow out the candle, the sprinklers came on in the park.

              She let out a shriek as water sprayed them and blowing out her candle in the process. She started to run away from the onslaught of water but she laughed as she did so. Jack followed (he would always follow).

          She stopped once they were out of the water and they were both slightly out of breath. She turned to him with a wide smile before she noticed his empty hands.

           He noticed her questioning gaze and he scratched the back of his head as he admitted, "I was...surprised and I dropped it."

            He looked down at the ground like a kicked puppy, "I'm sorry. You didn't even get to make your wish."

            She chuckled a bit before she stepped towards him, "I was really hoping to taste that cupcake but I already have my wish."

             "Really?" he furrowed his eyebrows. "What is it?"

               "You, silly," she said quietly before she acted on her courage while she still had it.

              She leaned towards him and pressed her lips to his. It was a soft, hesitant kiss that turned sweet as he returned it. Butterflies bloomed in her stomach, giving rise to nerves that made her feel like she was only alive for the first time in this moment.

                Their breaths mingled together once they pulled apart. She rested her forehead against his as she spoke softly, "Although, the forever part of my wish hasn't happened yet."

          "Forever happened when we met," he smiled.

               She smiled back and she felt so happy she could cry. She thanked whatever god there was for letting her meet Jack, her sinking ship.

            _____

            It had been twelve years since she met Jack. She went on to marry him only a year after she met him which her father made a fuss about (how Jack was beneath her) but there was nothing he could do to change her mind.

          Eventually, he warmed up to Jack when he realized that the boy didn't want her money nor her power. He was just a boy in love.

          But years had passed since marrying Jack and she was still madly in love with him. It was only a day after that first kiss with Jack that her father handed over her company Rosa.

             While being with Jack, she became a business shark. She kept Rosa a private company she owned so besides expenses, profits went to her. Her fashion company pulled in fifty billion per year.

           It was very successful but that was probably due to not only popularity but because she had two separate lines, a line that was cheaper and sold to the general public but then another that was expensive and sold to people like her. Her company marketed to both worlds.

          But Rose wanted to be more than just a fashion icon. She wanted to show she had a head for business so she made another company from her own fortunes. She got into the oil business and this company, RoseGold Oil, was public with shares on the stock market. She was CEO of this as well and she ruled with an iron fist.

        It took awhile for this one to gain traction as she worked to gain private contracts with gas station companies all around the world (while also building her own) specifying that they would be supplied by her company. But now her company was booming and it made more than she could ever hope for Rosa to make. This year RoseGold was set to bring in a net profit of two hundred billion.

           Rose finally became a respected and feared name in business. But she was still wildly popular by the general public for continuing to be the top fashion icon in the world. She was so popular that sometimes fans would swarm whatever building she was spotted going into and start chanting her name.

        She worried sometimes that it would be too much for Jack. But he never once wavered even when they were chased by paparazzi in their car. Jack remained steadfast.

         But it wasn't like Jack didn't have his own prospects. Shortly after she took over Rosa, he took over his family business of running the high-end restaurants they owned. No, he wasn't as wealthy as she was but he was successful and happy doing what he loved. She was happy for him and he was happy for her; everything worked.

                Her fans also loved her and Jack together. He was always dressed in a pristine suit and she always wore a cute dress. They looked like a dream couple and online they were called The Ship of Dreams in reference to the Titanic because of their names.

           Everything seemed to be perfect in their lives. But in the coming months, poison would seep through into the dream and kill it.

_____

Birthdays.

They were only a reminder that time could never stand still no matter how much one wished it could. Today was the birthday of her father and her presence was expected. She was in the elevator heading up to his penthouse suite.

She put away her sunglasses (that she nearly always wore) by letting them hang on the collar of her dress that had a sweetheart neckline. She did it often enough that she knew it drew attention to the valley of her breasts but she didn't much care. She didn't care about any man staring but Jack but it didn't matter today.

She stepped out of the elevator once it made to the penthouse. She immediately put on a smile once she saw the woman her father married, "Hello, Marcia."

"Rose, it's wonderful of you to make it," Marcia gave her a hug that she returned. "Your father was worried you wouldn't make it. Business, he said."

"I was able to get some free time," she explained.

"Well, lunch will be ready shortly after your father arrives. Make yourself at home," Marcia said before walking away.

"Look who finally showed up," Roman called and she turned to see him making his way towards her along with her other siblings. "Alert the news. The golden child is here."

She rolled her eyes but she held a small smile, "And my not so golden sibling is here."

"Please, you fucking love me," he smirked as he gave her a short hug.

She thought about her relationship with Roman changed in a lot of ways as she hugged him back. Ever since she defended him from the physical abuse that their father wanted to inflict on him (and her ability to actually stop it), he was softer with her than he was with anyone else.

She let go of Roman before she greeted Connor, giving him a short hug as well, "Hey, Con."

"It's always nice to see you, Rosie," Connor said affectionately.

"You, too, Con."

Rose turned her icy eyes to her sister. They once looked almost exactly alike with the same strawberry blonde hair but Rose dyed hers to a complete blonde eight years ago; it's also the time when she began wearing sunglasses everywhere she went like her own personal signature.

"Shiv," she merely acknowledged.

"Rose."

Roman looked between the two of them as did everyone else. Even though he was the king of finding out other people's drama, he had no idea what their deal was. It was just an unspoken thing between the two sisters; a tension that was never removed.

"So where's Mr. Jack in the Box?" Roman asked.

"He's working," she replied but she glanced at Shiv. No, it was not work, Roman thought.

Suddenly, the elevator dinged, implying the man of the hour was arriving. Marcia herded them all into their spots for the surprise that she knew Dad would hate. They all yelled the word as the elevator opened.

"Alright, alright," he grumbled, wanting the surprise to be over. "Are we done with that?"

Her three siblings went to their father but she stayed in her spot. Logan greeted his eldest first, "Connor, Primo! How are you?"

"Good. Excellent, Pa. Here you go," Connor went to hand him a gift before Logan saw Rome. "Roman! Romulus! Look at you! You look fantastic!"

"Yeah, of course," Roman gave him a brief hug. "Happy birthday."

Then his eyes went to Shiv, "Siobhan. Sweetheart."

"Happy birthday," she gave him a hug as well.

"Where's Tom?"

"He's here. He's just there," Shiv said as Tom appeared in his field of view as he looked around past the crowd of his children but then his eyes landed on Rose.

"Rosie," Logan began to form a genuine smile. "You made it."

"This time, yes."

Logan walked towards her and her siblings were all forced to get out of the way, "What? No hug for your old man?"

She smiled before she reached forward and hugged him, "Happy birthday, Dad."

"It's been far too long, Rosebud," he hugged her delicately.

"Business, you know."

"I know," he said softly as he let her go. He smiled understandingly and looked upon her proudly. His youngest, his replica. He was the only one that did know what it was like to put business first.

"I got you something," she smiled cheekily and he raised his eyebrows. He didn't notice a gift bag in her hand until now. "You know that war medal you've been wanting to add to your collection..."

She pulled out a shadow box from the bag that showed a medal, "Well, now you have it."

"You really went above and beyond this year, Rosie," Logan smiled. "Thank you."

There was talking in the background amongst the siblings that they didn't hear. Shiv spoke, "Does she always have to show how fucking perfect she is?"

"Perfection is kind of her thing," Roman scrolled his phone knowing the rest of them were ignored when Rose was here. "I don't know why you're surprised."

"Should I have gotten him a war medal?" Tom asked.

"I thought she was like the youngest sibling," all eyes went to Greg who was a bit loud.

Logan now remembered the nephew he brought with him, "Oh, everybody, this is Craig, by the way.
Cousin Craig."

"Craig? It's Greg. N-No?" Shiv clarified in confusion.

"Yeah. Greg. People sometimes, like, mistakenly call me Craig, too, so I'll answer to both."

The elevator dinged again and, this time, Kendall arrived. Logan narrowed his eyes, "Kendall? You came?"

"Yeah, of course," Kendall said as he gave their father a small hug. "Happy birthday, Dad."

"Uh-huh," Logan hummed in disappointment and then Kendall saw Rose. He knew then he made the wrong choice; he shouldn't have come to party because it was always business first. Even his little sister lived by that.

"Rosie," Kendall smiled. "It's been so long."

She smiled as Kendall wrapped her in a tight hug. She returned the hug as she uttered softly, "Congrats."

Even though she was wrapped up tightly in her own business and her own life, she knew what today was. The day Kendall would take over and if Dad thought he was ready then he had her full support.

"Thanks," he pulled away before his phone went off. "I'm just gonna...This is important. Uh, sorry, guys, I'll be right back."

Kendall went off into another room to answer his call. They all mingled or she watched the commotion unfold. Shiv tried to get Tom promoted before Connor gave Dad his gift which was sourdough starter.

"Guys, lunch in ten," Marcia announced.

"Alright, listen, just two minutes before lunch in the sitting room," Logan called. "Kids. Can you give me two minutes."

She filed into the sitting room along with her siblings. Logan came in right behind them with some packets in his hands.

"So...On the family trust, which will decide the situation in the event of my unlikely demise, I'm going to add Marcia to myself and you four."

She'd given up her shares in Waystar a long time ago. She split them among them her siblings so she didn't have anything to do with the family trust anymore. At least, she thought.

"Whoa. Okay," Shiv said. "But what's the other packet for?"

"Right, well, I want my seat to go to Rose on my death," Logan pronounced.

"What?" she blinked in shock. "Dad, I don't even have anything to do with Waystar anymore. I gave my shares up."

"Yes, a move that was probably too hasty," Logan said. "But someone is going to get the seat and I would like it to be you."

"Kendall's already signed, but if I can get you all to..." Logan started to say but was interrupted by Kendall.

"You're giving a seat to Rose who doesn't even want the company?" his voice betrayed his hurt; that seat should be his.

"Yes, I am," Logan stared him down.

"I wasn't aware of that when I signed," Kendall said.

"Read the small print, asshole," Roman stated. "But I don't see why it's a big deal if Rosie gets the seat. I mean, she's family."

And she'd do what Dad would want, Roman thought. She knew him best after all.

"I mean, I can probably sign the stuff for Rose but Marcia..." Shiv said in caution. "I'm gonna have to talk to my lawyers, just for all the implications."

"Of course," Logan nodded. "But look, I love the bread...goo. But this is the present I really want. By four, good?"

"Oh, also, I already mentioned to Kendall, despite the chatter and all things considered, I'm going to give it a couple of years," Logan informed.

"As in?" Shiv asked.

"I'll stay in situ. As chairman, CEO, head of the firm."

"Dad, wh... you... you what?" Kendall stumbled over his words in shock.

"I just said, son, or were you not listening, as usual?"

"But I'm... You're not... What?"

"It's no big deal. I'm staying on. We can discuss the details."

"You didn't tell me."

"We can announce you're in pole position, pending events, a move up or whatever."

"Pending events?"

Logan ignored Kendall as he started to leave the room, "Okay, come on, let's eat."

"Dad, wait."

Roman laughed as soon as their father left the room, "Oh, fuck!"

She whacked him on the shoulder, "It's not funny."

"Kind of is."

Rose gave him a glare and he raised his hands in surrender. Kendall left the room to go talk to their father some more.

"You should be fucking happy, though. He chose you to get his board seat," Roman said.

"I didn't want it," she sighed.

"You never want things," Shiv pointed out. "Dad just gives them to you."

"Well, I trust you, Rosie," Connor stood and gave her the packet that would give her the board seat. "And on Marcia, I'll go with whatever you guys decide."

Connor left the room before Shiv handed her packet over as well, "Here."

"You're actually signing?" Rose questioned.

"Well, it's not like you're going to do anything stupid with his board seat. You're going to do what Dad wants," Shiv answered.

"Yeah, here's mine, too," Roman handed her his before he smirked. "But don't worry we'll make Dad beg us to have Marcia added to the trust."

She sighed as they filtered out of the room. She slowly got up and followed. She didn't really think much of the implications of this; after all, what daughter wants to think of a world where her father is dead?

_____

After lunch, they went to play the game. Baseball. She flew out to the field in her own helicopter by herself. When she landed, her father joined her and walked with her to the field.

"I got those papers turned into Gerri," he informed.

"Okay," she sighed.

She didn't want anything to do with the company because she knew how it would make her siblings feel. Jealousy. Envy. She already had to deal with it by being coined the favorite but being anywhere near the company just made it worse.

"Why didn't you bring Jack?" Logan asked.

She glanced where Shiv was, "He's working."

"You know I had my reservations about him in the past but I do like him," he said carefully. "He's good for you."

"I know, Dad," she gave him a small smile.

"Alright," he patted her back before he called out. "Let's play ball."

Rose stayed in the outfield with her sunglasses on before Kendall had to leave for business. Then Roman got a kid to take his place and teased him with a million dollar check if he got a home run. The boy did not and Roman ripped the check up right in front of his face.

Rose wasn't at all phased by the things Roman did but she wished he didn't make so many messes. This was a PR nightmare if it got out.

Once the game was over, she went over to the kid and his parents without being asked. She put on a pretty smile as she crouched down to the kid, "That was a really good try and for that..."

Rose took off her diamond bracelet, "You can have this, kid, and it is worth much more than a million."

"Really?" the boy smiled as he took it.

"Really," she smiled before she stood up and looked to the parents who had wide, grateful eyes. "And I would really appreciate it if you signed an NDA today."

Her assistant, Brenda, stepped forward and offered the forms, "We just need a little signature on the last page."

The parents were all too eager to sign it and she walked away. Her father had watched the whole thing and he patted her back as she joined his side, "Good."

She smiled before she hugged him, "It was nice seeing you, Dad. But I have a photoshoot tomorrow..."

"Yes, I know. Business," he smiled. If only Kendall would understand.

"Business," she agreed and then she was off. She got on her helicopter with her assistant while her father got on his own with her siblings.

They were all flying back in the same direction and she should've known something was wrong when his helicopter suddenly went in a different direction. She would come to learn that he had a brain hemorrhage.

AN: man this got SO long. But anyways her and shiv do not get along. There's a specific reason but it won't be revealed until season 4