---

"I like you."

I didn't mean to startle him with my words or something (although parang hindi naman siya ang tipo ng taong madaling magulat), but maybe, I just did. I suddenly had an urge to cover my face out of embarrassment, but I remembered that I was already wearing a mask. . . and it still fucking felt like my face was bare! Bakit ba kasi ang blunt ng pagkasabi ko no'n?

I had never confessed to someone that confidently. Ever.

I mean, come on, just look at me. And I just met him.

Yumuko ako nang marinig ko ang medyo matalim niyang pag-inhale. The sound felt excruciating. Damn it.

"The time is. . . " I heard him say as I casually yet carefully looked back at him, "6:03 PM."

After saying that, he slid his phone back into his pocket, and me. . . I looked down again. Argh, what I did was. . . cringe-y.

"See you tomorrow, gorgeous."

"Huh?" I looked up again.

"6:03 PM, tomorrow. I'd like to see you tomorrow."

With that, he went away. The whole "I like you" thing must've been a big factor that made him check the time and leave me out in front of the gorgeous sky.

Oh, my—

He called me "gorgeous," and definitely, I wasn't able to count how many times he did. . . but he did! People rarely—very rarely—do.

Stupid Stephanie. Dalawa lang ang maaaring dahilan kung bakit ka tinawag na "gorgeous." It's either your pretty mask covered your ugly face or it did not and it's all sarcasm.

But I don't think the way he sounded was made of sarcasm. It felt true.

Ah, basta. Basta ang alam ko. . . may bukas pang naghihintay sa akin. 6:03 PM.

"Uhm, Cerulean," he said, making me realize that he was still there. "Please don't let yourself fall deeper for me. I just don't want someone to be hurt just because I can't like them back."

---

"Ba't ba ang excited mo, ha?" ang sabi ni Lannie, who was half-irritated, as I, still holding my stiff expression behind Cerulean's mask, continued storming ahead of them. I was not freaking excited. I was damn frustrated, and I needed to go to Town in a Building. Or at least to get away from the walls of home.

"Hindi ako magdududa kung bukas or mamaya, sila na no'ng Chris—"

"Sh-sh-shh!" I uttered. Hindi na natuloy pa ni Maddie ang buong pangalan ni Chris. Most likely his fake name. I also got one though.

"Ayoko muna, please," I said as I tried to keep as calm as possible. "Enough of the teasing. Oo, I think I like Chris, but that's not the darn point. I was desperate going here for one thing."

I was already standing still as everything around me felt isolating. I was with two of my best of friends, but I still felt lonely. It's not that I don't feel the confidence and care they let me feel, but there it is again—the feeling I loathe. The skin of my back felt hot as the heat traveled to my nape then to my ears. I knew that anytime soon, I would be exploding—not with anger but with tears.

The air felt stingy against my eyes. Damn it.

With all my might, I kept myself from speaking as I knew my voice might break soon. My friends' eyes were, like, piercing through my head. . . like, examining me. I have been holding all the thoughts and heaviness since Maddie drove us here.

Sa bahagya kong paglingon, nakita ko ang kailangan ko. My cold and shaking legs led me to the restroom as the sweat on my forehead started dripping down.

I was unfortunate enough to find the girls' restroom a little too crowded. Wala na akong nagawa pa kung hindi ang mapahawak sa pader na katapat lang ng restroom. Footsteps followed me, and I knew those belonged to my friends. Suddenly, the anger that built a wringing sensation in my throat melted into the warm tears in my eyes as I remember what just happened at home.

Of course, I didn't want to leave Mom and Dad at home as they argued. Pero hindi ko alam kung saan ako papanig. They never said I should choose or anything similar, but I felt so down. . . especially when they fought about my prolonged locking up in my room. They always cause it. They just don't know. I am tired, and they think I'm just being overly emotional.

Maybe I was. Maybe I wasn't, but. . . I don't know. Ang hirap ipaintindi sa kanila na hindi ko na kayang taasan pa ang grades ko ngayon. I did everything I could. That was all. Kung mayroon pa akong mailalabas, binuhos ko pa sana. Kaso wala na, e.

A warm hand tapped my shoulder. Lannie. Paris, I mean.

"You can tell us, Stephanie," Lannie whispered so no one could hear.

Neither of them two knew what I was crying about. Approximately thirty minutes ago, they found me standing outside home, clutching this teal mask. The clouds feel heavy when you can't pour anything out, when you care too much about letting others see the rain.

Tears streamed down my face, damping the unique material composing the mask. I was thankful it was not made of paper, cardboard, or anything like it. Because even with me crying, the mask still felt expensive against my face.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," I said as I muffled my voice with my right hand. "Sorry kung nasungitan ko kayo. Sorry kung umiiyak ako nga—"

"Sh-sh-shh," Lannie copied the sound I made a while ago, but she made it sound calming as they pulled me into a hug. "May problema ka kaya ka gan'yan. Tell us, Stephanie."

I didn't expect that she would utter my name here the second time around. I ignored my name as if it wasn't mine, as if I wasn't "Stephanie," and as if I didn't have my problems.

"Salamat," ang bulong ko sa gitna ng yakap namin nina Maddie at Lannie habang pinipilit kong pigilan. "Ayos na ako. I love you, guys."

They understand me best even without literally understanding.

I carefully wiped my tears beneath the mask. Ayaw ko nang malaman pa nina Lannie at Maddie ang nangyari sa bahay. Dadagdag lang ako sa bigat na nadulot ko sa kanila in the past.

"Tell us. You can tell us."

"No." I made my voice sound sure. And luckily, I succeeded.

"Ayos na ako," I said. "Sinumpong lang talaga siguro—masyadong bumigat. 'Yong mga gano'ng bagay."

They let me take a step backward. Everything felt at ease than a few minutes ago. Grabe, I thought that this day is supposed to be a good time to look at the sky from the balcony of the third floor. It wasn't, I guess.

"Ano'ng oras na?" I casually asked.

"5:57 PM, dear," Lannie said.

Chris Hartell and the thought of how he made me see the magical view on the third floor yesterday crossed my mind again. I wanted to see the same sky again. It felt strange to want to talk to Chris again. I knew I just liked him because his mask was. . . attractive. But it wasn't meaningful enough.

Why do I care, by the way?

Just as we decided to walk to the elevator, my eye caught Chris's gaze. It wasn't a concerned look, but it felt like it was one. The feeling probably wasn't real since I was basically a little shocked with his sudden appearance.

"Cerulean?"

He walked towards us, showing off how he walks so perfectly. But he didn't have to show off. It was already obvious how he looked so. . . perfect. Yes, even with the mask on.

Ang lantod talaga, my brain still managed to say.

"Your eyes are red," he casually said. Oh, of course, he doesn't care. You two just met.

Wait, what? Halata na umiyak ako?

"What happened?" he then asked. Maybe he does care, I thought.

Before any of us could speak, I said, "Nothing."

"It's one minute to 6 PM," Chris said, and I was expecting for him to invite us to the balcony of third floor to see the beautiful sky. "I have to go."

There was only one obvious thing he was trying to tell me between the lines. He was secretly telling me to follow. I held the hands of Lannie and Maddie. . . of Paris and Veronica. They had worn the same masks they wore yesterday, so I didn't find it hard to adjust.

"Let's go," I said, trying to keep as calm as possible. "He said I should meet him. 6:03 raw."

Napapangiti akong umiling nang masabi ko ang oras dahil sa butal nitong minuto. Ang weird lang.

This time, I led Paris and Veronica's way as I tried to slowly follow Chris. Town in a Building was more crowded than just a-little-bit-crowded, but I managed to follow him until we got to the elevator. I remembered how I thought of Chris the first time I saw him—which hasn't made a big change yet—as the elevator moved to take us to the third floor where I did the embarrassing dare. Where I saw Chris with a beautiful scenery that I could draw. Where he called me "gorgeous."

The elevator opened. He looked at me with—strangely—concern as if he was checking his little sister's safety. That made me feel weird. I didn't want him to look at me like a sister, and I knew I was aware of what I was thinking. Kahit na alam kong umaasa akong magugustuhan niya ako, alam kong hindi mangyayari 'yon.

But a soft thought crossed my mind. Mayroon kaya siyang nakababatang kapatid?

I didn't make a guess to answer my own question and just headed to the balcony before it could be 6:03 PM.

Just as we had been in the same place where we talked about the sky, he said, "6:02 PM."

He gave us a smile and added, "Just as punctual as me. Maybe we could be good friends."

I didn't answer, but I was thinking, Hindi pa ba kami friends? Well, oo nga, hindi pa nga ata. . . after all the awkwardness I started yesterday.

I looked up at the sky, then to Chris's black watch he wasn't wearing yesterday. It was already 6:03 PM, but the sky wasn't the same sky we saw before. The shades of blue were darker, and the pink shade was so minimal. Before I could even speak, he had started saying, "I knew it—that the sky won't be the same like before. We don't always get what we want, do we?"

His words. I didn't know what they meant.

I wanted to show off, too. Yes, I had decided to stop dreaming to be an English teacher before (because I was afraid that I might not be able to explain myself well like English teachers always do), but that didn't mean I didn't have flowery words up my sleeves.

I opened my mouth to speak, but I was interrupted when I decided to listen to what Veronica and Paris were whispering about.

"Nagugutom na 'ko," Paris said.

"May alam akong seafood restaurant sa mall," Veronica said. "Kain tayo ni Cerulean?"

"Sige, sige." Then Paris said in a louder voice, which I supposed that Chris heard, "Kain tayo, Cerulean?"

Town in a Building is a town in a building, indeed, I thought. I mean "town in buildings." Gusto ko tuloy libutin pa ang Town in a Building.

"Ka—"

"Can you stay?" Chris said in the middle of my word. Huh?

"Can you stay?" he repeated, facing me this time. I shrugged.

"Maybe we can just buy food for you," Veronica said to me, her voice getting a little unclear due to the voices of the Mic-Takers. She then turned to my newly met. . . friend, I guess?

"Magpapabili ka?" I asked, quite confused whether I should ask him or not.

He shook his head and turned to the sky. I took a glance at the sky, which only got darker. The sky we looked at yesterday wasn't going to appear.

Veronica and Paris were waving at me when I saw Paris holding an opened purse with cyan-colored bills that glowed like neon in the shadows. What the heck was that? I wanted to ask my friends what those bills were, but I was a second too late. Nakaalis na sila, at ayaw ko naman silang habulin para lang malaman kung ano 'yon. Baka sabihin ni Chris, I was being rude.

Instead, I asked him, "A-ano 'yong hawak nila? Anong pera 'yon? It doesn't look like bills of any other currency I know."

" 'Yan ang pera dito sa Town in a Building," he said, giving me a smile, a welcoming one. . . like he knew I was new to this place.

Oh, shit. I shouldn't have asked that. Now, he knows that the person behind Cerulean is new here. I love this place, but Paris and Veronica always said that there could be dangers.

Oh, shit. Bakit ko nga ba siya pinagkakatiwalaan?

Er. . . whatever. I always have my pocketknife in case something bad happens. Just kidding.

"Those are The Town Bills. Or Neons. Or Cyans. No one knew what it's really called," he continued. He stood, a Scrapbook of Moments in between his manly arm and his defined torso, like it was no big deal that I gave a hint that I was new.

" 'Wag mong sasabihin sa iba na. . . bago ako," I said, and it sounded pathetic.

I thought he already knew what I meant by that. "Don't be ashamed," he smiled again; this time, he was smiling widely. "People even say it on the Mic-Taking. And they're proud."

"Ce," he said abruptly as he turns to face me. "Gusto ko ako lang ang tatawag sa'yo no'n." Who are you to say that? I wanted to say.

"May tumawag na sa akin ng Ce. Si Veronica."

He shrugged and tilted his head lazily. Oh, don't give me that look. I'll fall deeper for a stranger, my goodness.

"Why were you crying earlier?" he asked me; I was dumbfounded by his sudden change of topic.

"How did you—" Oh, my eyes.

"I just know," he briefly said. "Why were you crying?"

I hesitated because. . . of course, why wouldn't I? Who was he? Just because he has those beautifully wild eyes and carelessly set hair doesn't mean I could tell him things.

"Home," I said, surprised by my own voice. Shouldn't have said that, shouldn't have said that. . . . But it was too late to regret it. I already felt my tears rolling down.

"Don't be afraid," he said, his uncovered wild eyes turning into concerned ones. "I'll listen, gorgeous."

No, he looked gorgeous. Even through my tears. But can he even help if I tell him about my tears? I thought as I set my eyes upon the simple details of his mask. Does he even mean it whenever he calls me "gorgeous"?

I remembered every single thing I didn't like about school. 'Yong mga kaibigang kilala lang ako kapag kailangan nilang makapasa. 'Yong mga oras na ako dapat ang kasama ng mga kaklase ko imbis na ako ang iniiwan. 'Yong mga taong nang-iiwan sa akin sa table ng canteen na parang wala lang ako. 'Yong pressure na kailangan ko magkaroon ng matataas na grades kasi. . . I always had them for my entire life?

I remembered the sound of Mom's voice and of Dad's footsteps. And even if they pressure me a lot for not having enough grades, I felt sorry for leaving home. I wondered what they were thinking of me. Pero ayaw ko pang umalis.

Not any moment later, I found myself between the arms of the stranger who summoned those memories. I found myself pressed against the chest of the stranger with the black-and-white mask. I wasn't pulling away. It felt safe in his arms, and it was like my doubts for Chris were washed away.

"Whatever that is, just remember that you are gorgeous and precious," he said as I felt subtle thumps within his chest. "I am here to listen to you whenever you need me."

I pulled away, looking down, as I felt it was too much.

"Please don't let yourself feel like I'm a stranger," he said. "I don't want to see my future lady crying. She doesn't deserve that."

I looked up, startled with what I heard. His words greeted my shock even more, "Can I sign up as your man?"

I knew what he meant, and I didn't dare to answer. I thought I was hearing false sounds because it all seemed too quick. I didn't feel gorgeous, but I felt important. The sound of the speakers indoors shifted from the Mic-Taking to a familiar song, and as though a fairytale, I realized that it was my favorite song. I was hearing Marié Digby's "Say It Again."

The song appeared to be, like, wiping the tears and pain away. I was happy.

I wanted to hear it again, and I uttered, "Say that again, please."

---

➡️ ON THIS DAY, I am dedicating this to fantasticraindrop, yes. You know why, sistah. ♥ Hope you enjoy this. *giggles*