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December 14 pa lang, pakiramdam ko ay February 14 na, at kakagising ko pa lang ay naalala ko na agad ang ginawa ko kahapon. Naalala ko na agad kung ano ang pinasok ko, at hindi pa rin mawala sa mukha ko ang hanggang taingang ngiti. Damn, masyado na akong nagiging corny about this, I thought.

Kaya habang nagbre-breakfast ako, sinusubukan kong pigilan ang masyadong pagngiti para—parang—makapag-practice dahil baka masyadong mahalata si Chris na sobra akong nadadala sa mga sinasabi niya't ginagawa. I'm excited to see him again though.

In the least expected moment, the doorbell buzzed its way to call me, kaya naman tumayo ako para buksan 'yon. Lannie's presence greeted me, and I immediately knew what we would be up to—ang mahaba-habang kwentuhan.

"Ngayon pa lang ako kumakain, e," I said, giggling. "Kain tayo."

"Busog pa ako, dear," ang sabi niya. "Grabe, nagsangag si Mommy tapos itlog ang ulam, then tuyo."

"Ah, kaya pala," I laughed, sitting again to eat. Paborito niya kasi 'yon. "Ako naman, ito, noodles kasi kagabi, nag-crave ako."

"Kinikilig pa rin ako," I added involuntarily, as if my heart or my mind spoke for itself.

"Nasaan ba si Tita Michelle?" ang tanong niya.

"Wala si Mom," ang sabi ko naman. "Pumasok sa work."

"Ah," she said. "Okay."

"Kaya kinikilig ako," I said. "Kasi makakapunta tayo ng Town in a Building tapos naalala ko na naman siya."

Damn, napaka-cheesy at napaka-corny ko na talaga.

"Punta ba tayong Town in a Building ngayon?" Lannie asked, watching me finish my meal.

"Gusto ko nga, e," I said before drinking down a glass of water. "Ikaw ba?"

"Oo naman!" she exclaimed. "Punta tayo?"

"Sige, sige!" Agad na akong tumayo para ilagay na ang mga ginamit ko sa lababo. Sinundan naman ako ni Lannie kung saan kami nagkwentuhan. Hangga't maaari ay binilisan ko ang paghuhugas ng mga pinagkainan ko dahil hindi na ulit ako makapaghintay na makaalis at makapunta sa Town in a Building.

"Oo nga pala," Lannie said, "anong sabi niya no'ng sinagot mo na siya?"

"Ayon," I smiled, scrubbing the sponge against the spoon, "parang nagdiwang siya through his words, but to be honest with you. . ."

I paused, looked at Lannie, and continued, "it was sexy."

"Naku po," Lannie giggled, looking at me like I wasn't myself. "Pero dahan-dahan ka lang, dear, at baka mamaya, masaktan ka. Mundong puro kasinungalingan pa rin ang pinasok natin."

It made me pause from everything. From washing the dishes, from thinking of a reply to give to Lannie. But I didn't let it get me for a long time. Bumalik agad ako sa paghuhugas ng mangkok na parang 'di ako masyadong nag-alala tungkol doon. Sa totoo lang din kasi, hindi naman ako masyadong naalarma pagdating sa mga gano'ng bagay. Sa isip ko, Town in a Building was just Town in a Building because the world outside was tough for me.

At that point of time, I didn't want to merge it. Somehow. Maybe.

"Oo naman," I said, forcing a giggle as I finally finished washing the dishes. "Town in a Building is Town in a Building pa rin."

"Okay," she said. "Pero iko-consider mo ba na first boyfriend mo si Chris?"

"Uh. . ." I uttered, drying my hands with the white towel hanging on our refrigerator's handle. "Bilang Stephanie o bilang Cerulean?"

"Bilang Stephanie, dear," she said.

"Hindi," I quickly said.

"Sa bagay," Lannie said.

"Uh. . . dito ka lang muna, ha?" I said, preparing to get my towel from our backyard. "Maliligo lang ako, ta's punta tayo ng Town in a Building?"

"Sige, sige," Lannie replied. "Pero daan muna tayo sa bahay. Magbibihis lang ako for the day."

"Sige," I replied, giving something to our conversation redundantly. Without saying any word before doing it, I ran up my room to pick a set of outfit for today: a purple blouse with a cape collar neckline, a black box pleated skirt, and a pair of shoes I hadn't brought in Town in a Building yet—my black ankle-strap wedges. And I ran back to the bathroom, bringing everything I needed (except for the shoes, of course). Knowing Lannie was just there, outside, I felt okay and safe from the things that would normally bother my mind, like those that chased me down until I found Town in a Building. So in peace, as much as how funny it might sound, I brushed my teeth.

Nakatingin ako sa sarili ko sa salamin nang maitanong ko sa sarili ko kung bakit nga ba ako niligawan ni Chris. I mean. . . si Cerulean. That was when I realized that it was not the mirror that I should look at but the mask of Cerulean and the way I was playing the role.

But the moment before he asked if he could court me was vulnerably showing my true self. So I asked myself, Should I consider that Cerulean or Stephanie?

I asked myself the question that I answered—I think—right and too soon: Do I really consider Chris mine?

No, I convinced myself. This is not something unsure. Town in a Building is not the real world.

Under the shower, I thought about things that I never thought I would think. When I was washing my hair, I thought of not-so-happy things about Cerulean and Chris's relationship. Won't it last? Won't it become as happy as I am thinking about it?

But gradually, it changed into thoughts that go like "I want to know him more and not only him but his favorites and why they are so." I wanted to know what could represent both of us, in different ways and in different places. Because even if I was thinking that I didn't want to merge the real world and Town in a Building, I would delve deeper into this feeling if I could.

Before I knew it, I was already done taking a bath and I was already in my clothes, so I went out to go to Lannie, who was waiting for me in our living room. Kinailangan pa namin pumunta sa bahay nina Lannie, which was only a few streets away. Magbibihis pa raw kasi siya, plus we would ask Maddie if she could help us in going to Town in a Building. In short, papahatid kami.

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By the time that we arrived in front of Town in a Building with the help of Maddie, I learned two new things. The first is that Lannie and Maddie's school had finally confirmed their made-early Christmas break, which means I could finally come with them to Town in a Building. . . kahit gaano pa kaaga, and the second is that Maddie wouldn't be able to come with us for the day because she had something to do. Fortunately, hinatid niya kami at susunduin niya rin kami mamaya.

"Thank you, Maddie," Lannie and I said, unconsciously, in unison.

"Ingat," we, again, said in unison. Napatawa naman kami dahil doon.

"Sige, ingat din kayo," Maddie waved before Lannie closed the car's door.

With that, we walked up the three-step staircase of Town in a Building's entrance and opened the door made of glass. Hugging my Scrapbook of Moments, I entered the town of lies with Lannie.

"Check muna natin 'yong Secret Mailposts natin," Paris said as we strode. "Baka may s-in-end si Chris sa'yo."

"I wish," I mumbled, involuntarily, again.

"Halika na, dali," Paris giggled na para bang kinikilig siya para sa akin. "Dali, let'szzz go!"

We then entered the already iconic (as well, yes, in my head) black screen of mask codes and camera and entered our mask codes. And by the time it was already my turn, I realized that I had finally memorized my mask code. It's 9836 1 932. See? I told you, memorized ko na.

Soon, we were in one of the also iconic elevators of Town in a Building. There was one thing that was so beautiful yet terrifying about the elevator, and it was the full glass window that, like, embraces the elevator with a round shape. It allows us to enjoy an overlooking view of the outside.

"We're here na, dear," Paris said. "By the way, ang mailpost number mo ay 'BP29,' okay?"

"Okay, BP29," I said, repeating what she said.

"Unahin nating puntahan 'yong akin, para save the best for last," she said, giggling. "Malay mo, marami pala siyang letter para sa'yo o kaya mahaba ang pinadala niya for you."

"Sige, sige," ang nakangisi kong sabi at saka nagmadaling pumunta si Paris sa mailpost niya. Not knowing much about Town in a Building's Secret Mailposts yet, I just followed her. Agad naming napuntahan ang mailpost ni Paris, at mabilis niyang sinusi 'yon para mabuksan. When she saw that there was no message, she locked it up again, just like how we planned it.

" 'Yong susi ng sa'yo, nasa pocket sa likod ng Scrapbook of Moments mo," Paris explained, eyeing my Scrapbook of Moments. Binuklat ko naman 'yon sa pinakalikod, at nakita ko na ang pocket na sinasabi niya. I took the key as Paris led the way to my mailpost. And it turned out, my mailpost was stacked up the top of five more mailposts' levels. Without wasting any time, I keyed the lock and to my surprise, nothing but an envelope greeted me.

Of course, I was excited, so I grabbed it right away.

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From: Chris Hartell
To: Cerulean Hathaway

December 14, 2017 | 9:43 AM

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"It's from Chris," I said, smiling. So I opened it as fast as I could and as careful as possible. Then, I finally got to read the beautifully and neatly written message, and here was what it said:

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Greetings, my lady! I have a match here on the fifth floor later at 10:15 AM. We will be playing 15-ball rotation or what they call rotation pool (or billiards) here. I hope you can watch me play. It's gonna mean the absolute world to me.

Take care! See you there if ever you read this on time or before the event. I love you!

Chris

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Smiling like a fucking idiot, I slid the letter back to the envelope and inserted it between the pages of my Scrapbook of Moments. A small part of me said that I should keep it inside the mailpost because my mom might see it, but I just went with the flow, still, and kept it in between the timeline of Cerulean's life events. Napangiti ako ng dahil sa sulat na ito, at gusto ko pa ring itabi ito at dalhin kahit saan man ako pumunta. Duh, nakakikilig kaya, I thought, kahit na it's just from this town of lies.

"Yieee!" Paris exclaimed, but I just tried to brush the words off my brain by locking my mailpost again. Still smiling, I slid the key inside the pocket of my Scrapbook of Moments.

He just wrote "I love you," didn't he? my thoughts went, echoing through my head like it was empty. Well, I guess love makes your head empty because only one thing runs in your head. . . if that is how it works. Or am I just thinking about nonsense things?

"Punta tayong fifth floor, dear," I said, hugging my Scrapbook of Moments once again.

"Bakit? Ano mayro'n?"

"Chris has a match," I replied. "10:15 AM, fifth floor."

"10:17 AM na," Paris said, checking the time on her wristwatch. "Dalian na natin. Wawa naman ang boyfriend mo, walang inspiration."

I rolled my eyes playfully. " 'Wag ka ngang gan'yan, kinikilig ako 'pag naaalala ko, e."

"Sorry naman," she said, laughing.

And as soon as I was ready, we walked to the elevators. And when we got in and when the doors of the elevator were already closed, just like what I always did, I pressed the button. . . for the fifth floor, this time.

The elevator carried us to the fifth floor, a newly found place for me as a new citizen of the town of lies, and we found the room filled with people carrying bottles of beverages around. Some carried glasses and some carried chasers. The lights partied. The loud music covered the place like smoke, and I could see people gathering around one of the three billiards tables. That was the moment I knew that was it.

Across the crowd of the people surrounding the billiards table, I saw a young man, looking around the crowd, as if finding a familiar face. Or should I say a familiar mask?

We then moved closer to the crowd of people, and for the first time, I was leading the way inside Town in a Building. And it was towards Chris.

Maraming tao ang nakapaligid sa billiards table, dahilan para hindi ko makita si Chris. Even with my heels on. Pero nagsi-alisan na ang ibang mga tao sa harapan ko, at nabangga nila ako papalapit sa billiards table.

"Dear," I heard Paris' voice. "Nood ka lang ng billiards diyan, ha? Kita tayo ng lunch sa third floor."

"Sure, sure," I said, waving at her. Then, nasiko naman ako ng isang tao na umaalis sa panonood ng billiards.

"Ouch," I uttered.

That was when I realized that I was already in the front of the watching crowd, and I could already see Chris at the other end of the billiards table, doing the thing that would determine who would go first, both of the players striking balls with their cue sticks. Nagkatinginan si Chris ng kalaban niya matapos nilang makita na ang bola ni Chris ang mas malapit sa kanilang end ng table. And even with masquerade masks on, I could feel the tension in between them two.

Pero sa kabila no'n, nakuha pa akong kindatan ni Chris nang makita niya ako.

Damn it.

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