She smiled at the letter tracing her finger on the tint of the letters and a tear escaped her eyes. She took a deep breath and read it.

To Alina,

      Alina, I'm sure you'll do a great job taking care of everything especially of him I have learned that just like me he is only a little boy inside a man's body he craves love and attention and he sure has a lot of emotions and a difficult temper, he feels and knows everything even if you think he doesn't he is always aware, it's easy to hurt him and easier to make him happy but I know you already know that. I'm proud and content with life don't think I ever left unhappy or that I wished death I lived till I could and my desire to continue here was all thanks to him, life gave me a borrowed son after my wife died, it gave me an opportunity to help, to live for me and not for her, to love in a different way.
I left happy, I know he will complain he will be mad at you because of me, he will turn the world on his back because I betrayed him, I didn't asked for help when I perfectly knew he could help, he will say dozens of things about me, he will blame me, he will blame you, he will put that weight on your shoulders and in the end he will blame himself but tell him that I leave happy with the life that I wanted, that I left with love not knowing it was possible, I left with a piece of him in me and I thank him every day.
I must thank you to for being a kind hearted, to give me a piece of my wife, to make me remember her more lightly even when I was older. I must thank you for being who you are.
When you're reading this everything may seem hopeless, and this will all sound crazy and unbelievable but I have more than faith on you, I am certain that you, Alina, will make it right, you have her strength, you may have more, you have millions of things and loved by him and I'm sure that love is what will make you pass through all of the things together, after all it was what made me pass through everything.
I'm sure when you read this I will be telling Doris how proud I am in my two kids. I'm sure when you're reading this I am happy.
   It's time for you two to be happy, now, that I know you're but grown and mature, I'm sure all that you now have will be taken care of.

Have a beautiful life, Alina, just like you inside and out.

Alina was crying miserably by the end of the letter. The tears were no longer tears but a small river that was falling in straights lines from her eyes to her jawline, the water fell into the letter making the black tint turn a shade of blue and the soft paper become see-through on the place the tears fell.

"Shit! SHIT" she heard Colten curse loudly, scared she rushed outside to find him kicking the water pipes "Why isn't it working? Why is everything in this house not WORKING?"

She saw him kneeling in the cold grass alone, as if he was about to pray but instead he shouted "WHY? WHY DIDN'T HE TOLD ME? Why is he such a rude old bastard? He could've told me he was sick I would take him to everywhere he wanted I would do the fucking chemo with him! I would do everything he would ask me too"

Alina slowly approached Colten who was still kneeled on the floor his head bent down. "I could've helped him! Why didn't he let me help him? WHY? You fucking bastard!I hate you! Can you hear me? I hate you!"

Alina approached him and kneeled next to him she grabbed his shoulder and caressed him

"I... could've help him" Colten murmured while his head fell to her chest, he silently cried and she kept on saying sweet nothing's to his hear and now and then he would give a big cry. Eventually they moved inside, he sat on the couch and she lit up the fire. She returned to be next to him and without any words his head rested on her legs, she covered him up with a blanket and there he cried out till he fell asleep.

*~*~* The next morning

Alina woke up in a warm blanket and a couch pillow she was laying on the sofa comfortably, she strangled remembering how she was last night. The one laying down on the sofa was Colten how did they switch? Why doesn't she remember at all?

She took a good look at the house and noticed the buckets of woods near the fireplace, once she got up she was immediately cold. The house was big and it used to be warmer but now the house is empty due to the rebuilt the house is just walls and empty rooms making it colder.

On top of the balcony was a mug, she got up and noticed it was coffee.

Is this for me? She though

Looking at the kitchen counter she found a bit of cat food "Oh right the cats! They must be starving" Harold didn't had any cats but some stray cats would eventually appear at his door, he grew fond of them and fed them everyday he even made a little shelter near the entry steps for them to sleep and end up by naming them.

Alina walked out with the food in hand and watched the cats meowing at her "I know I know I'm sorry I forgot...You must be so hungry right?" She said getting down and placing the food on a bowl,  they purred and leaned on her legs thanking her she smiled and petted them carefully "Yesterday you had no food right? I know , you must be so hungry and...cold" she noticed the white grass and the frozen lake "'hm going to get you some milk and blankets for your little shelter ok? So you can be warm... I'll be back ok? Eat everything" She said to the three cats

"It's more important their eating than yours" she heard from inside the house. She closed the door and watched him near the kitchen balcony holding the mug, he had his coat on and his cap she presumed he had been outside maybe also due his red nose and the couple of buckets with wood near the sofa

"I didn't know it was for me "

"Do I need to put your name on it so you now it's yours?"

"Ok... my bad" Alina said quickly ending any kind of discussion they might had. She prepared a bowl of milk to give to the kittens meanwhile he turned the TV on

"There you go kittens. Hi Simba! " She said petting them "Yes Elvis I can see you too.." she laughed at the cat who wanted her affection "Oh Luna, you seem a bit full, you haven't been eating that much to be have such a huge belly?"

"Are you letting go the cats or what?" Colten questioned making Alina roll her eyes

'He is so boring right?" She murmured to the cats

" We appeal to all people in the region to take shelter and stay indoors." They heard the woman on the TV said, caught the attention of both "It will be a rough day with a dangerous night. This blizzard maybe the worst from the past 7 years"

"A blizzard warning" Alina murmured

"Help me with the wood" Colten demanded

"Yeah in a sec" she said opening the shelter and putting the blankets there "You stay safe" She said to the cats, she closed the door and helped him out bringing wood inside "I should probably warn my brother that I will be gone for another night" Alina said to herself

"Do you have a charger?" Alina questioned him, he only raised an eyebrow and kept preparing the wood

"Great help" she tried to turn on the phone but "it's dead...great.." the battery ended "I don't know my brothers number by heart. How can I contact him now?"

"My phone is on the table in front the couch you can take the number and dial it on the house's phone" he said looking at the white phone at the entry hall

'Thank you" she smiled quickly grabbing his phone and placing it hear the white one. She turned on his phone and without intention her eyes landed on his messages...

Coach... Mom... Helga? Who is Helga, and treating him by honey? Is he dating? Unbelievable...

Although her thoughts wandered around the woman that weirdly made her skin irritated her attention focused on the wallpaper

I know this place... I mean.. It's so familiar to me

"Did you find it?" He questioned scaring her

"Hum yes.. yes I did" she lied quickly searching for her brother's number and dialing it, after a time of calling it Aaron picked up

"Hello? I'm sorry... who's this?"

"It's me" Alina informed

"Sister... I was on my lunch pause"

"Well..I'm sorry to interrupt I just wanted to give you some news

"Oh that's great, you're coming home?"

"Not exactly... there's a blizzard coming and I need to stay indoors. Tomorrow I'll go home"

"A blizzard? Where the hell are you?"

"Not that far but a bit far"

"So explanatory Alina "

"Yeah. I'm sorry"

"I'll try to cover it up the best I can. Be safe and don't go outside...We'll talk tomorrow then"

"Thanks brother"

"Yeah yeah...just stay safe"

"Are you starting to care about me?"

" It's the cold making you hallucinate?" He laughed

"not yet" she smiled

"Be safe ok?"

"you too" They ended the call and Alina thought about making some lunch while Colten was getting the house ready for the strong winds and snow

"What do we have here?" She asked herself going through the new cabinets

"Noodles and... noodles. Thank god I brought noodles whenever I was coming by" she smiled at herself thinking about Harold "Noodles it is"

She made some noodles with eggs, since it was everything they had . Harold had completely cleared the food in the house.

As she was making the noodles she watched him outside breaking the wood to fit in the fireplace, by the time they had more than ten buckets full of wood inside the house and more five outside near him. She knew he wasn't just breaking wood, he was taking his anger and revolt on those.

She thought about Harold words on the letter 'He will blame me...he will blame you...and in the end he will blame himself', those words got stuck in her head she didn't want him to blame anyone, life had a course and this was also part of the process, a painful one but still part of it.

Colten had passed trough it with the death of his grandad when he was a child and now that life had gave him another, life did also took him away. Colten would at all costs not reveal his true emotions, she knew that, he would not cry because he missed him but for anger just like yesterday.

He was going to pass through a lot
since he was going to hide his real feelings for a long time but in that moment she promised herself that she would just not let him go away.

Like she did a few years ago...