The dim lighting of the kitchen hangs in a peaceful veil. The small flicker of light catches against the wall as my dad and brother light the candles on my double chocolate cake. The perfectly rich frosting is lined in delicately drawn flowers, a sign that my brother called ahead to Butter Bakery to get my favorite cake.

"Happy birthday to you," Jare begins to sing, quickly followed by my dad and Cam.

Cam's hand reaches for mine below the table as he gently slides his fingers between mine. The heat of his touch melts every piece of me, our bodies drawn close together in the dark of the room. What I wouldn't give to rest my head on his shoulder, to take a needed breath.

Today has been amazing. Having my brother home, having the house filled with laughter and chatter has been one of the best gifts. But this moment still carries a bit of empty with it.

My eldest brothers aren't here. It's rare that they make it back for something as trivial as a birthday anymore. And then there's the forever vacant seat of my mom. It's days like today, moments like right now, that her absence feels a touch stronger.

The things I'm feeling for Cam, everything about last night...I wish my mom were here to talk to. I wish she was sitting at her piano, her smile lighting up the entire room as she sang happy birthday.

As they finish singing, my brother slides in beside me, the flicker of the candles swaying in front of me. I squeeze Cam's hand just a bit tighter. His leg brushes mine as I close my eyes and allow a wish to rise up within me. I wish I could have my family back together again. Happy and together.

With a small inhale, I gather my breath and blow out all eighteen candles in one try. My brother shouts as my dad gives a few claps. Cam's thumb runs along the back of my hand before he lets me go, knowing that the lights will soon be back to full force.

Small chatter fills the table, laughter and joy buzzing around. Though there's still that small shadow of empty, there's also warmth. I haven't felt the excitement of family since Jare left for college, a sentiment I didn't realize just how badly I missed until now. But as I look across the table at each and every smile, it reminds me that despite those who are missing, I'm still fortunate to be surrounded by so much love.

A true happy birthday.

As the chorus of voices falls and Cam begins to clear the table, my dad shifts within his seat. My eyes catch his nervous movement. He takes a small breath before glancing briefly to Jare and back to me. "I was going to wait until tomorrow," he announces, "but you're brother leaves in the morning and I think this is something I want to do while he's here."

Confused, I glance over at my brother. He's watching me, a solemn look across his face as he folds his hands in front of him.

When I look back to my dad, he pulls out a small envelope attached to a tiny velvet box. "Happy birthday, Mackenzie," he says, sliding the gift across the table. "This is from your mother."

My breath catches, my heart still within my chest. If it weren't for the heat of Cam's presence as he slides back into the seat next to me, I'm pretty sure I would have forgotten how to breathe. Taking a breath in, I search for that hazel glow beside me. Cam's eyes are on mine, reading every broken emotion rattling my core.

"If you want some privacy," my dad speaks up again, "we'll give you space."

"Yeah," I whisper. "Can I just...I think I'll go to my room."

No one speaks as I push up from my chair and grip the small box and letter within my hand. There's a million threads of emotion weaving their way across my chest. I don't even know where one thought ends and another begins.

A gift from my mom.

Something she deliberately thought about. Something she wanted to make sure I had at this exact moment.

A piece of her.

I push through my door and let it close behind me before slowly making my way to my bed. Sitting at the edge, I hold the letter in my hands, terrified to open it, afraid to break the elegant seal. Tearing into it carries a heavy weight. It's so incredibly precious as it sits unharmed. Sleek and smooth and just as she left it.

With a few heavy breaths, I slide my finger beneath the seal. The gentle tear of the paper fills the silence in the room. Ever so slowly, I pull the cream colored paper from the envelope. The beautiful scroll of her handwriting hits in a wave, the tears filling my eyes before I've even had a chance to start.

My Beautiful Mackenzie,

Happy Birthday. Eighteen magnificent years. It's this very moment that society grants you the title of being an adult. But I have a pretty good feeling you've taken that step long before the world has deemed you so. I know the strength you carry, the weight you've inevitably taken in my absence. You've given your all to be there for our boys, haven't you? You've opened your arms and given them a place to land, to heal. My only hope is that you've granted yourself that same freedom. Because life is full of so many beautiful moments. Moments that you have yet to live and that wait for you to discover. Moments that will make you smile, that will make you dream and laugh and love. That's my wish for you. I wish that you get to love, that you get to accomplish every dream, and that you get to live everyday with a smile. The world needs your smile, my beautiful girl. Even on the days that feel a bit like the sun won't shine, remember that every flower needs a storm in order to bloom. Shine bright, my girl. I love you, and I will forever be with you.

With so much love,

Mom

Tears roll down my cheeks, my hands a shaking mess as I read her words over and over. It's not until a quiet knock falls along my door that I let my eyes leave the page.

Wiping at my cheeks, I clear my throat. "Come in."

When Cam's eyes fall to mine, I let out a breath, feeling every ounce of swirling emotion cascade from my shoulders. In three quick strides, his arms scoop me up and I collapse into him.

"I've got you," he whispers into my hair, gripping me against his chest and letting my tears soak his shirt. He holds me there, shaking within his arms.

When my breaths fall back in pace, I pull back just enough to look at him. His hands fall to my cheeks as he wipes away my tears.

"Thank you," I whisper.

"I'm sorry if you wanted to be alone, I–"

"No," I stop him. "This is exactly what I need." He nods as he holds me. "I'm actually okay. I know it doesn't look like it," I laugh, "but I'm okay."

"Yeah?"

"Yes." I take a long inhale before releasing the air, allowing myself to breathe. "I think if I read that a few months ago, it would have destroyed me. But in a way, I think it's exactly what I needed."

"I'm really happy to hear that, Kenze."

I smile. His eyes drop down to my hands, to the box that remains closed. Shifting within his grasp, I pull the box open. His hands slide around me, holding on as I slowly prop it open.

Inside is a silver chain with a single delicate sunflower. My heart glows as I smile, feeling as it stretches its way across my face.

Every flower needs a storm in order to bloom.

"It's beautiful," Cam says beside me.

I pull the necklace from the box, watching as it dangles within the light. "It's perfect," I acknowledge. "Can you put it on me?"

Without a doubt of hesitation, he reaches for the chain. I dip forward as his arms swing around me. It takes him a moment to get the clasp, but once it's closed, I lift my head. My fingers fall to the small flower, resting gently against it.

I've been searching for answers, for ways to share a moment with my mom. But I think all along, every step I've taken, I've taken with her by my side. I've shared countless moments with her. Ones I wasn't even aware of. But she's been here. She's always been here.

"Cam?"

"Yeah?"

I search the beauty of his eyes and cling to the warmth of his gaze. Without another word, I lean forward and press my lips to his. I know without him, I wouldn't be in one piece right now. Without him, I'd still feel like a fractured shell of who I once was. But he's given me strength, shown me a light I thought went out a long time ago.

His hands slide around me, pulling me tighter against him. When his tongue meets mine, I slip my fingers into his hair, deepening the kiss and feeling his heart ignite against my own.

Everything heated from last night flourishes through me. His fingers trace the hem of my shirt, the touch of his skin along mine igniting a fiery passion. Kissing him, falling hopelessly into his embrace, is my new favorite thing. If I could, I'd kiss him forever. I'd let him heal every single piece of me, one all encompassing kiss at a time.

"What the fuck?" Those three words echo across the walls, a harbored anger laced between each and every one.

Without a second of hesitance, Cam's hands drop from around me, his warmth suddenly ripped away as he stands from the bed.

My lips still buzzing, I lift my eyes to take in the last person I want to see looking back at me, not like this.

But he's here. Jared is here. And he's pissed.