Camden is chewing on a strawberry, making the most annoying sound as he swallows through the quiet of my bedroom. Yes, he's in my room, perched along the corner of my bed with his chemistry text held out in front of him. Now, normally, this would be progress from the last few days he's spent actively avoiding me. But he's on the exact opposite side of the bed from me, like as far as he can possibly go without falling off. And he hasn't said a word. Well, apart from asking me if I wanted one of the strawberries he's slurping away at.

I'm exaggerating. I'm well aware. But he lied to me. And now all I can seem to do is pick away at any and every flaw I can until my system can make sense of why the heck he's giving me the cold shoulder. Since I couldn't actually find a flaw that made sense, strawberry smacking it was.

Except every time he takes a bite, his lips perfectly rounded, it has the opposite of annoyance flooding through me. Damn it.

"How was your talk with your coach?" I ask, keeping my eyes trained directly on him, watching intently as he shifts.

"Huh?" he asks, not bothering to lift his attention from his textbook. "Oh, yeah, it was good."

Pushing my notebook to the side, I sit forward, closing a bit of that space between us. The dip of the bed has him turning to glance my way before he slides the bowl of fruit to the side.

"What did he want to talk to you about?" I ask, wrapped up in full detective mode, ready to pounce at the first sign of weakness.

"Just, uhm..." he pauses to clear his throat. "He wanted to see how chemistry is going. If I'm bringing my grade up."

"He couldn't have checked that with Mr. Farris?"

"I mean, yeah," he answers. "He could have. But he also just wanted to check on me I guess."

We're getting nowhere, and the way he casually fills in every question as if I'm not freaking Nancy Drew right now has me losing all realms of stealth as I blurt out, "So he ditched his wife to talk to you instead of checking with Mr. Farris?"

"I guess so. Wait, what?" He finally turns and gives me his eyes. Their hazel glint reflects off the limited lighting in my room as he opens them wide.

"You lied to me, Camden. Your coach goes to lunch every Monday with his wife. You couldn't possibly have met with him."

"How do you know he goes to lunch with his wife?" he questions, pushing his textbook from his lap and turning to fully face me now.

"Does it matter? You lied to me, Cam."

"I know," he admits, and it's in the defeat rolling off his shoulders that I sense the burden he's carrying. He's holding something back, and I have a feeling I know what it is. The reality of where this is going is pricking the backs of my eyes, but I will it away, taking a breath to remind myself what all of this has been. "I'm sorry," he offers.

"Listen, if you're tired of this whole arrangement just let me know. We can end it." The words sting at my throat as they come pooling out in front of me. They shouldn't hurt, they're not supposed to hurt. "But please, please don't make me the girl everyone cheats on."

"What?" He scoots closer, bringing that wide space to a near close as his hand slides along my thigh. Why does his touch have to feel so good? Why does my heart have to ignite when he's close and spin out of control at the thought of this coming to an end?

"You've been avoiding me all weekend. And then you skip out on lunch the same day Porcia just happens to miss lunch too. If you want to hook up with her–"

"I wasn't with Porcia." His eyes hold mine in honesty, that glisten sparkling across them and giving my chest a spark of hope.

"But she–"

"I don't know where she was," he continues, gripping my leg as he runs his hand a bit higher, causing all that heated tingly stuff to flourish across my chest. "But it wasn't with me."

"Oh," I huff. I should be relieved by that fact, but there's still a build up of something else behind his words. If he wasn't with Porcia, then why is he avoiding me?

"Is that really what you think, Kenze? After everything...that I would have left to be with her? With anyone?"

"I don't know. No...maybe. You've been acting weird since the party, and I know pretending to be with me means you've had to give up other things and I guess I just thought, I don't know, maybe you were done with all of this."

The grip he has on me lightens as he pulls a breath of air through his lips. "It's not that. I just...needed a minute."

"From me?" I clarify. When he doesn't answer, I take a breath of my own, using its heavy inhale to push down the emotions that are supposed to be buried. "Did I do something?"

He shakes his head. "No. You haven't done anything."

"But you need space from me?"

"I..." He takes a beat, running his hand down his face before the breathtaking glints of green come into view. "Kenze, do you even know how hard it is to be around you?"

A hammer slams against my chest, a wave of emotion suffocating the air trying to make its way to my lungs. I can feel it, the tidal wave breaking the surface. I pull away, taking the heaves of air necessary to push it all down, to hide everything building up inside me.

"No," he quickly adds, sliding forward and placing his hand to my chin to pull my eyes up to his. "That came out wrong. I didn't mean...I just..." There's panic in his eyes, concern and everything beautiful.

"You just what?" I whisper, afraid of what's waiting for me on the other side of that question. His eyes search mine, bouncing back and forth between my own as the words stay trapped within. The silence lingering, clawing at my chest with every passing moment.

"Fuck it," he whispers just before he slips his hand to the back of my neck and presses his mouth against mine.

He's kissing me.

Camden Beck is kissing me for the second time. The soft, sultry caress of his lips push against me as he pulls me closer. I don't cower away this time, I don't hide behind the remnants of shock, instead, I wrap my hand around his neck, pulling him into me, feeling the warm slide of his tongue on mine. The sweet taste of strawberries fills my tastebuds.

There's nobody here to flaunt this to, no one to put on a show for. Which means...

He pulls back, the stream of heated breaths feathering my lips as he holds me close and whispers, "I've wanted to do that for a long time."

"Cam..."

"Kenze," he interrupts, pulling back just enough to let me see his eyes. "It's not hard to be around you because I don't want to be. It's hard because every time I am, all I want to do is kiss you. I want to hold you, I want to feel you against me, I want to actually call you mine, for real."

"You..." Words. I have no actual words to piece together. He wants...me?

"Please say something," he begs, his hand still firm against my neck as he holds me with him, our breaths tangled in a web of heat and anticipation.

"I'm just...You like me? As in...you like me, like me?"

"Yes, Mackenzie." He laughs, a nervous shake falling along his voice. "I like you, like you. Like a lot."

"Since when?" I question like a complete idiot, but the frantic beat of my chest has stolen all ability to process the words falling from his lips.

"Since forever," he says with that sexy little smirk that tickles my insides.

Breathing. It's an innate concept. And yet my body has lost all forms of control when it comes to the matter. "What?"

"Mackenzie," he breathes out my name, the cutest smile lighting up his eyes as he scoots even closer. "I've had the biggest crush on you since we were kids."

"Why?" I want to slam my palm to my face as soon as the question leaves my lips. But he's Camden Beck, the town's athletic pride and joy, Vista High's heartthrob. And he likes me?

I still have no words. That thing in my chest is beating wildly, though. It's throwing a whole party within my ribcage, bouncing off the walls and skipping to its own beat. It's that thing in my head that's throwing up all the flags of insecurity and self doubt.

His brows pull together, the cutest question bouncing across his eyes as he pulls me in. "You're Mackenzie freaking Cooper." Those simple words flutter across my chest in glittering glory as the heat rushes to my cheeks. But he's not done, his eyes hold mine as he continues, "You're beautiful, you're smart, you make me laugh and always manage to find a way to put a smile on my face. You get what it feels like to lose the one thing you want to hold onto the tightest, and you always seem to see through me even when I'm trying desperately to stay hidden. You could kick my ass at nearly any game and you're not afraid to throw that fact in my face. You're the girl that makes my heart go crazy and the only one I ever want to see in that jersey of mine, because fuck, Kenze...you wear it to damn perfection."

The heat that falls along my cheeks has me smiling. "Cam..." I have no words, no actual way to piece together everything that's spinning around inside. But I don't think I have to because one simple tear spills over, slowly trickling down my cheek. I don't rush to hide it or wipe it away in shame. I embrace it, wearing it as a badge of honor, as a beacon of everything I feel for him.

"I'm gonna need you to say the words, Kenze," he urges. "Don't hide. Not from me."

I grip his face between my hands before slipping one to his chest, feeling the way his heart beats rapidly against my palm like an anthem. "I like you, too. Like a lot."

His smile hits my chest when his head falls to mine, his fingers sliding into my hair. "You do?"

"I do. I really do."

The way his eyes light up, a warmth shining brightly across them, settles against that wave of heat hitting my chest. "You have no idea how long I've waited to hear you say that," he breathes out as if my admission is a sign of relief, as if he's been holding his breath just waiting for me to say the words.

And then he kisses me, his mouth firm against mine as a flourish of fireworks ignite across my chest. I let my hand drift up his chest and behind his neck as I pull him into me.

Kissing Camden Beck is a wave of emotion I've never felt before. I know there are so many things wrong with kissing him, so many things left to figure out. But for the first time in a really long time, I don't care about anyone else. I care about this moment, right here, in the quiet of my bedroom with a boy who has managed to break past my walls and cherish the broken girl lying behind them.