I can't hate for long.

It isn't worth it.

-William Saroyan

Emma

I have to almost run to keep up with Arashi's long strides. He doesn't look back but makes for the entrance of the hide-out. He doesn't say a word either until we reach the trapdoor and then he reaches for his belt and removes an object. "Hold this," he says, "keep it with you at all times and don't hesitate to use it."

I look at the gun he handed me and hold it uncomfortably. I've never held a gun in my life and I don't want to now.

Arashi must have seen the helpless look on my face, because he sighs in annoyance and moves to stand behind me. He takes my arms and folds my hands around the weapon. His hands guide my fingers. "Safety off, safety on." He lifts my hands and holds them out. "Shoot at this height. Don't worry about the aim for now. Not getting caught is our first priority."

He lets go of me and stalks towards Rob who is on look out duty. They exchange a few words and Arashi impatiently waves me over. "We should be back tomorrow morning," Arashi says to Rob. Then he turns to me. "Stay close and do exactly as I say."

I can only nod. I'm slightly startled by the coldness in his voice. I haven't really interacted with him since I came here.

"Coast is clear," Rob says, "be careful." He pulls some sort of mechanism and I hear the grating of the trapdoor. Only now I notice the ladder in the corner. It wasn't here when I arrived. Or perhaps they only use it to get out.

Arashi doesn't respond and climbs the ladder. A few seconds later his head appears. "Come," he says.

I glance at Rob for a second before ascending the ladder. The second I'm through the opening, the trapdoor is closed and I hear that grating sound again.
They must be covering the entrance with something so it's hard to find.

For a moment I'm blinded by the brightness of the outside world. I've been locked up in the mines for so long that I almost forgot what it's like to be in the open.

Arashi doesn't give me much time to recover. He grabs my arm and pulls me with him towards a nearby rock formation.

We slide through a small opening and stand next to a vehicle. There's only one car. Burns' car isn't here. They must have hidden it somewhere else.

"Can you drive?" Arashi asks and when I nod he hands me a key. "I have to hang the camouflage back in place, so you need to drive the car out of here."

Wordlessly I climb behind the wheel and wait for Arashi to give the okay. Once I'm out of the hiding place, I wait for him. He opens the door on the driver's side and waves me over to the passenger seat. I obey without complaint and we drive off.

***

Arashi turns out to be a man of few words. The entire drive passes in silence, but I don't mind. I spend my time thinking about what to say to Rain and trying to keep the panic at bay. After the time underground, the world seems like a terrifying big place.

It's like there is danger around every turn. Strange what lock up can do to a person. I haven't felt like this when I was with Burns, even when I was in more danger then than I am now.

"You're not going to freak out, are you?"

Arashi's voice startles me after so many hours of silence. I turn my head to look at him. He has his eyes on the road and there is an annoyed expression on his face.

Perhaps that is the face he always has, I cant be sure.

He sighs. "Going on a raid is dangerous enough. Going out like this, so soon after, that's insanity. So I need to know you can hold it together."

I grit my teeth. Does he really think I'm a scared little girl, that I'm useless? "I'll try not to get in your way," I hiss.

He doesn't even blink. "You need to do more than try," he says.

"What is your problem with me?!" I growl.

"I don't have a problem with you" Arashi replies, "I couldn't care less about you. It's the problem that came with you that messed everything up."

"Burns can be trusted," I hiss, "he won't harm anyone. He is a good person."

"Then why are we in a car right now, risking our lives?"

I don't really have an answer to that, but if anything, it's more my fault than Burns'. If he hadn't saved me, he'd have no reason to run. He would still be with his friends.

And with that realization I have found my answer. "Because..." I say, "because he saved me. And now I have to save him."

***

Arashi parks the car somewhere on a deserted road, a few miles from town. We have to wait a little longer for dark to set in.

He opens the compartment next to his chair and hands me a granola bar an a bottle of water.

"Thank," I mutter.

He doesn't look at me, but keeps his eyes on our surroundings. "Do you know where to find a phone?"

I close my eyes and try to remember what it was like to be Sky. The memories are duller now, but the outlines are still there. Where can we find a phone? Museums, theaters, the post office. "Gas station," I whisper. It's the safest option I can think of. The phones are usually outside, so it doesn't require a break in.

It is however a place with an ongoing stream of cars. Maybe we can find a less frequented station along the highway.

Arashi nods and turns the key again, putting his sunglasses on. I follow his example, though if we're pulled over, they'll check our eyes nonetheless.

...

It takes a while before we find a gas station. Arashi passes it and takes the next exit. We need to find a place where we can park the car out of sight and then walk towards the phone.

I look at his hands that are still around the wheel. His knuckles are white from his hold. "You need to relax," I say softly, "you'll look suspicious if you are so tense."

He glares at me.

I sigh. "I'm just saying, you need to act like one of them, like you belong. That way they won't look at you."

"Just hurry up," Arashi growls.

"I can go alone," I suggest. It's not something I look forward to, but I might have a better chance on my own. I've done it before, before I met Burns.

"No," he hisses, "who knows what you might tell your little friend. I'm going with you and I want to hear every word."

I look at him stunned. "You really believe I would betray you? All of you?"

"I'm not really sure what you're capable of," Arashi says in an angry tone, "for all I know you've struck a deal with those creatures to turn every human in for exchange of your own life."

The accusation alone is ridiculous, but instead of defending myself, it makes me angry. "You know what?" I growl, "I was wrong, you would fit right in. Just pretend you're a Seeker." I push the car door open and climb out, making my way towards the gas station.

It doesn't take him long to catch up with me. He grabs my arm and pulls me back. Before I can protest, he places his hand over my mouth and pushes me against a tree trunk. He looks over my shoulder.

Two Souls pass by, only a few feet away from us. They're chatting with each other and don't notice us. As soon as they're out of hearing, Arashi lets go of me. "I told you to stick close to me," he says in a hushed tone.

I let my breath escape and swallow nervously. Why can't things go smoothly for once?

Arashi glances around again and I can clearly see the tension around his mouth an eyes. How many times has he stood there like this already? Going around, getting supplies for everyone at the risk of his own life?

Suddenly I feel ashamed. No matter how the others feel about Burns or I about them, we're all in this together.

I take a careful look at the gas station. The phone is outside on the parking lot. There are only a few cars there. We can make this real quick. How hard can it be?

I look at Arashi questioningly and he gives a stiff nod.

Calmly we walk towards the telephone.

Time for my best performance ever.