“You want to end all cruelty?” he asked, “and greed and all those things? I don’t think you can. You are very clever, but you can’t do that, no.”

 -Gormenghast book 1, Young Titus.

Burns

I watch as Emma enters the room with Sophie. She looks a bit uneasy. A moment later Blake is at her side and guides her to a bench on the other end of the room.

A stone settles in my stomach, but I grit my teeth against it. Of course she’d sit by him. He is human and from what I gathered they were friends before.

This was what I wanted, wasn’t it? For her to be back with humans. Then why am I feeling so bad?

They seem to get along rather well, they’re chatting amiably, and as soon as Emma finishes her plate, Blake pulls her with him towards the exit.

She glances at me now and catches my stare. He says something to her and she follows him out.

“Don’t worry,” Nate says, “she’ll be back.”

I clear my throat and look at him. “She seems to like him.”

Nate shrugs. “I believe their parents knew each other. They were in school together.”

I sigh and glance at the hall they have disappeared to. I wonder if there’s more to it. I remember now. She said his name in her sleep once.

“Are you done eating?” Nate asks, receiving some angry looks from te others in the room.

I nod. I don’t want to intrude anymore than I already have.

“Good,” Nate says, ignoring the others, “let’s go then.”

“Are you going to kill it now?” Evan asks.

“This discussion is over, Evan,” Nate says in a dangerously low voice, “I don’t want to hear another word about it.” He glares across the room, “from anyone. Are we clear?”

There are some grumbles and Evan grits his teeth.

Nate turns to me. “Come. Let’s find you and your sweetheart a place to sleep. You can’t crash at my place forever.”

Hastily I follow him out of the room, glancing at the remaining humans one more time. “Maybe it would be better if you did kill me,” I say to him.

“I’m not going to kill anyone,” Nate says.

“But I’m the intruder here. They are right. I have no right to be here. I am an alien.”

“Are you that eager to die?” Nate studies me for a second, “would you really do that to her?”

I stare at him.

“Didn’t think about that huh? Don’t go play martyr, boy. You wanna live on this planet, you’ve got to try harder. You can’t just quit when things are tough.” He sighs. “Look, I wasn’t a very nice person before all of this. Who knows? Maybe it took an alien invasion to give me a wake up call. Anyway, I have things to fight for now. You should show some more respect for the life you have been given. And I don’t just mean the girl.” He gestures towards my body. “What about him, hm? You gonna take his life twice?”

His words shock me. Have I really been selfish? I only wanted to make these people happy. They want me gone. I know I have wronged them, my kind did.

I bite my lip. I have always believed that when I took over this body, that it meant it was my body now. There is no more David. I know for I have searched.

But…

His memories are here.

Is Nate right? Perhaps part of David lives on. If I were to give up this life, it would all be gone. I can’t do that.

My eyes find Nate’s and I nod. "You’re right. I… I’ll stay.”

Nate grins. “Good. Then you can stay here.” He points at a small half round space. “It’s not much, but If you lie real close, it can hold two people. And you’ll have some space to move. We can find something to use as a curtain.”

“Why?” I ask, “why are you so adamant abut me staying here?”

He shrugs. “I’m a curious man. And trust me, it’s not just from the goodness of my heart. We are sharing this planet with your kind now. Might as well learn something useful.” He places his hands on his hips. “Do you have everything you need? I know you have sleeping bags ands such. I suppose you have some spare clothes. I’m afraid the rest will become common good. Meds, food, the car.”

“The guitar,” I suddenly remember, “I’d like to have that back. It’s Emma’s.”

Nate nods. “That shouldn’t be a problem. A few of us have some personal belongings. I only meant the things that will sustain us. I’ll see where the boys have placed it.”

Three men approach from the other side of the tunnel. They give me hostile glares and their conversation stops short the moment they reach us.

“Morning,” Nate greets cheerful, but they ignore him and walk on, glaring at me again over their shoulders.

“They’ll come around,” Nate says, “as soon as they know you’re not a threat.”

“And if they don’t?”

Nate shrugs. “Then they don’t.” He turns. “Come, let’s go carry your things from my space.”

I nod and turn. And I come eye to eye with a girl. She had half long strawberry blonde hair and she stares at me terrified.

“Ah sorry,” I say.

She doesn’t respond. She seems frozen in place, but I see her hands tremble.

“Rachel,” Nate says kindly, but he has a cautious look in his eyes.

She bolts.

I look at Nate concerned. “Will she be okay? Should we go after her?”

“Best let her go,” Nate says, “She has gone through a bit of a trauma. She’s terrified of your kind.”

“Why? What happened to her?”

“I don’t know,” Nate says, “she won’t talk about it. Maybe Blake knows. They came here together.”

She came with Blake? Does that mean she knows Emma too?

Emma.

Where is she? I haven’t seen her since this morning. What time is it now?

“I…I should find Emma,” I say.

Nate smirks. “We’re underground, kid. There’s nowhere she can go. She’ll be fine.”

“She doesn’t like crowds,” I mutter.

“Blake will bring her back safely. He’s not a bad guy. Besides, you’ll want to get your room in order before the rest gets back here. Best let them get used to you one step at the time.”

I sigh and nod. Perhaps he is right. But I am concerned about Emma. She didn’t seem comfortable with being here.

Nate slaps my shoulder. “Don’t look so worried, son. It will be alright.”

I just hope it is true.