Tragedy makes you grow up.

-Jane Campion

Emma

We reach the hide-out in the afternoon. All four of us look like we've been mauled by animals and then run over by a semi, though that doesn't stop Finn from looking around curiously. The circles underneath his widened eyes give him a raccoon like appearance. It might have been funny if I wasn't so tired.

Nate has pulled us aside in the kitchen while the others store away our supplies. One look at us told him everything he needed to know and now he's drawing the story out.

It's mostly Blake that does the talking, aided by Burns who fills in some of the gaps. I'm watching Finn. At the moment the boy is perched on one of the tables while Sophie is trying to smooth out his hair. She is happy to not be the youngest anymore.

Finn undergoes it patiently, too impressed by the change in scenery to protest. He is still so young and he has already witnessed things no child should ever see. How long before the innocence is gone from his face?

"Emma?"

I look up when Nate's hand falls on my shoulder. His smile is filled with sympathy. Blake and Burns are both watching me concerned. "Sorry," I say, "did you say something?"

"Just making sure you are alright. Sounds like you've been going through a rough couple of days with that Seeker and those Healers."

The wedding rings Blake saved for me feel heavy around my neck and my tongue feels parched. I don't know why I'm having such hard time with this. "I'll be fine," I mutter.

Nate isn't buying it. "Why don't you and Burns go to your room for a bit? Take some time for yourself." He follows my gaze as it moves to Finn. "We'll take care of the boy and help him settle in. If he needs you, we'll tell him where to find you." He taps my chin. "Maybe take some 'Sleep', yeah? If something comes up that requires your attention, we'll call for you."

I nod at him. Maybe he's right. Maybe I just need some time to myself. I'm safe now.

Nate nudges me towards Burns, who is looking at me with uncertainty. We haven't really talked since the other night. Does he regret it? Are we back to square one now?

I know he's been with other girls, before he met me.

We walk side by side towards our sleeping space, not saying anything. Burns holds open the curtain for me and then follows me inside. We sit there awkwardly.

"So," Burns says, "how are you feeling?" His eyes are on the matrass and he's picking at his shirt.

My own hands are plucking at our blanket. "Tired," I say, "sad. I don't know." It's been an emotional couple of days, that's for sure.

Burns nods and looks away awkwardly. "I could... stay somewhere else."

There it is. The inevitable. Maybe we should have thought things through. We're going to run into each other every day after all.

I bite my lip. "Okay, if that is... what you want." It still hurts to say those words, but I can hardly force him to stay with me.

Burns looks at me apologetic. "I just want to give you some space."

I blink at him. "Space? I don't need space."

"But..." Burns looks surprised, "I thought... you were so quiet..."

I smile at him sheepishly. "I was giving you space. After what happened with Rain and Storm... they're your family after all. And if it hadn't been for me... I made us go there... if we had just gone home..."

He cups my face. "You were right. If we hadn't gone there, they would still be living their lives. But that Seeker... he would have gotten suspicious. Perhaps he would have thought... something had happened to us. He might have started another search. Or he would have become suspicious of you specifically, like Rain. They knew you were a resistant host. Either way, we would have been in trouble. Am I sad about losing them? Yes, I am. It would have been nice if they had accepted you, but I don't think that would have happened. They were Sky's friends, not yours. If they found out I shipped her off planet to save you... Souls don't have a word for betrayal, Emma. They don't understand the concept. They'd probably remove me from this body and place me in another, younger, less influenced body."

His words startle me. They would do that? I imagine Burns in the body of an infant and shudder. Would I still love him then? Would he still be Burns? Of course he would be. Only... he wouldn't be the Burns I know. It's not something I want to think about, but if they ever catch us... If they ever learn what he did...

Burns leans his face closer to mine and brushes a strand of hair behind my ear. "Hey," he says, "don't worry. I'm not going anywhere."

I lean forward and kiss his lips. "Promise?"

He smiles and plants a kiss on my forehead. "I promise."

***

I wake up early. After being away for so long, it's strange to see the walls of our small sleeping space again, but I've never been happier. Burns is still asleep, but when I sit up, he stirs.

I lean over him and give a light peck on his lips. "Sleep," I whisper, "I'm going to take a shower and see about breakfast."

A sleepy smile appears on his face and he mutters something unintelligible.

I kiss him again and make my way over to the washing area. No one else is there yet, so I have the room to myself.

The cold water wakes me up even more and I make my stay as short as possible. Next I make my way to the kitchen and I'm surprised to see I'm not alone.

At the table in the back, Arashi has his hands around a mug of coffee. It makes me hesitate to enter. Arashi and I don't really get along. It's not like we hate or ignore each other, but he makes me nervous. And even if he has accepted Burns, he seems to prefer not to socialize with us.

Blake said not to take it personally, that Arashi is just a private person and nobody really knows his past. He hasn't really done anything to make me wary of him. He just gives off this vibe that he'd rather be alone.

His eyes settle on me. I can never tell what he's thinking. "Don't just stand there," he says in an ever distant tone, "either enter or get lost."

I take a deep breath and walk up to the cabinet. I opt for a bowl of cereal. The milk we brought won't hold for long, so we have to finish that first.

When I lean against the table we use as counter, Arashi rolls his eyes. "Just sit down. I won't eat you."

I clear my throat and sit down across from him. "It just seemed like you wanted to be alone."

He scoffs. "No one is ever alone here."

True that.

"You brought in a kid," Arashi says.

I nod. "Yeah."

Another awkward silence.

The silence is interrupted by two pair of footsteps and Blake's voice. "See? I told you we'd find her."

I turn to the doorway where Blake is standing with Finn. The boy grins when he sees me and darts up to our table. "Blake's room is really cool. He has a lot of stuff. Did you really make the picture on his wall? He said you made more. Can we go see? I haven't really had time to explore yet. Will you take me?"

I blink at his endless stream of words. Why is this kid so attached to me? Blake is the one that took him under his wing. All I did was feel awkward and make stupid decisions.

From the corner of my eye, I see Arashi standing up and taking his coffee with him. Finn's busy presence must be too much for him this early.

Blake chuckles and takes the seat Arashi abandoned. "Go easy on her, kid. It's still early. She's probably still half asleep." He looks at me and tilts his head. "Burns still asleep?"

"Hmm," I nod.

Finn is eyeing my breakfast hungrily, but seems afraid to ask if he can have food too. I have to remind myself that he's a kid and that he's new here. "Hungry?" I ask.

His stomach answers for him and he bites his lip.

Blake nods his head towards the cabinet. "Go find yourself something you like. You know how to make your own breakfast?"

Finn's eyes go wide. "I can have anything I like? As much as I want?'

"Well, let's not eat yourself sick," Blake comments.

Finn crosses his arms. "I know that. I'm not stupid."

I hide a smile. Blake has found his match in this kid. I look at Finn. "Normally we do have rations, but the first few days after a raid, we have to eat all the food that spoils easily. And of course now that Burns shops for us, life is not so sober. So go ahead."

Finn grins and hurries towards the food. He comes back with a bowl of cocoa puffs, a bag of chips and three Twinkies.

"That's not breakfast," Blake raises his eyebrow.

Finn sits down and glances at him. "You said I could have whatever I liked."

I smile at Blake amused.

"You're enjoying this, aren't you, squirky?" Blake says dryly.

"Yup," I agree and I finish my cereal.

Others file into the kitchen and Burns is with them. His eyes catch mine and a loving smile appears on his face. He walks up to us, kisses my temple, and sits down next to me. A grin appears on his face when he sees Finn's breakfast. "Good choice," he comments.

"Don't praise him," Blake huffs, "he'll think he can have this kind of food every day."

"What's that, Blake? Developing fatherly feelings?" Logan has approached us and slaps Blake's back.

Blake rolls his eyes, but doesn't respond.

Logan looks at Finn. "Once you've finished your breakfast, you can get a tour of the place. And then we'll see how you can help out around here. I'm sure we can find some chores."

Finn scrunches his nose. "I have to work?"

"We all have to earn our keep," Logan says, "prevents us from getting lazy. Stops us from picking fights." He grins. "Besides, you'll have to work off all that sugar. Can't have you bouncing up the walls. This is a fragile place."

Finn only stares at him.

"It's not so bad," Burns assures him, "we have free time too. Maybe you want to learn how to play guitar or read some of Sophie's books. I'm sure she won't mind sharing."

"I guess," Finn mutters.

I smile sadly. This can't be easy for him. He's just lost his parents and now he's in an underground hide-out with a bunch or strangers. He should be playing outside with other kids, but that's not going to happen.

Burns' arm slides around my waist and I'm gently being pulled against him. "We have the day off," he mutters, "since we went on the raid. What do you want to do today?"

I lean into him with a content smile. "We can go to our spot," I say.

Across from me, Blake quirks an eyebrow. "Your spot? Who showed you that place again?"

Burns has his head on top of mine and looks at Blake. "You want to come too?"

"No thanks!" he declines, "I don't want to witness you two getting all lovey-dovey. Hearing you was bad enough."

My face is bright red. He heard us? I'm mortified.

Blake smirks at me and winks. "Nothing to be ashamed of, squirky. People do that all the time."

I still don't know how to breathe right. He heard us?!

"Breathe, squirky. Don't make me slap you again."

I huff and turn my head away. "Well, I'm sorry to have disturbed you."

He smirks again. "I never said that."

I cross my arms. My face still feels like it's on fire. "Pervert," I say.

He laughs. "I love you too."