Five weeks have passed since Nathan and I shared the kiss that changed the dynamic between us. I'm more than aware that the kiss that swiftly led to me getting pregnant brought us together, but kissing him on that sofa five weeks ago has changed everything.

Instead of tiptoeing around because I feel like I don't belong and keeping my distance when I walk into a room, I now walk in with no doubt and greet him with a kiss if he's there. I feel way less isolated in general, but not only that, I'm happy. We spend almost every night together in my room and he holds me until I fall asleep, his hand protectively on my bump.

It doesn't take a genius to guess what his main love language is; originally I thought it was words of affirmation, but no, it's very much physical touch. He doesn't stop touching me, even when we're eating dinner, I find that our fingers graze unintentionally. I thought it would make me feel claustrophobic like it used to with Aiden, but it doesn't, it's quite the opposite, it comforts me, and it sends my heart soaring.

The way I'm so comfortable around him scares me, but I no longer allow my fears to control my happiness. I'm facing them head-on, which is why when Nathan turned to me this morning and said, "Mom is having the girls tonight, she's not seen them since Halloween, so I was wondering if you would like to go out for dinner with me? On a date, just to clarify." I didn't freak out, I didn't panic, I smiled when I replied, "I'd love to," and then kissed him.

We haven't had the conversation about what we are, nor do I think I'm ready to do so yet, but we're dating and as of tonight that will technically be true because this will be our first date. It's been a long time since I went out for dinner, so I'm looking forward to it, especially since it will be with Nathan.

I'm not sure what I'm wearing yet, I don't have a lot of options because buying new dresses wasn't a priority when I shopped for maternity clothes, so I will attempt to fit into something old. My bump is growing well, I'm not massive like I thought I would be at this point in pregnancy, but if someone were to look at me, I definitely look pregnant.

I'm still feeling flutter-like kicks from the babies, but I've noticed in the recent week that I'm feeling them more often and stronger than when I first felt baby B, three weeks ago. It still shocks me when they do, but I love the reminder that they're kicking away and healthy.

My twenty-week scan is a week away and together, Nathan and I have come to the conclusion that we're waiting until the little ones are born to find out their sex. It doesn't matter to me as long as we have two healthy babies, and he agreed that finding out when they're born will make it even more special. So, whether there are two boys, two girls or one of each in my belly right now, is beyond my knowledge until the day I push them out and am told so.

I simply can't wait for that moment, but until then I'm more than happy enjoying life without two newborns because they sure will be keeping me busy for the rest of my life once they are. I'll never understand the people who mention eighteen years of dedicating your life to a child because parenting never ends. To some it does, but it'll never be the case with my children.

"What has you so deep in thought that you haven't finished your toast?" Nathan asks, walking into the kitchen where I've been sitting for a while.

He kisses the top of my head before he puts the kettle on and I smile, "I was just thinking."

"That's dangerous; what about?"

"The twins and how we're almost halfway through this pregnancy," I pick up my last slice of toast to see that it is, in fact, cold, but I still take a large bite.

"Time is going so quickly, which won't be changing especially with the holidays coming up," he leans against the counter, looking over at me as he talks.

"Speaking of, what is the plan for Thanksgiving, it's in less than two weeks now?" I ask.

"We're hosting this year, my mom and siblings are coming, and if you want to invite anyone, you, of course, can," he tells me.

"Nah, I'm good," I look down at my toast.

"Hey, what about your sister?" he asks and I sigh, looking over at him, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

"It's not your fault, it's just that I haven't spoken to her in two years and I don't even know what college she goes to, so I wouldn't know how to invite her."

"You don't have her number?" he asks.

"I... um, yeah, but what if she hates me?" I know I sound ridiculous, but she must.

"You're her big sister," he points out, "Imagine Elise thinking Addison, Nova or the twins hated her."

"I left her, Nath, it's so different. It was her sixteenth birthday when I last spoke to her; she told me to go to hell because I didn't go to her party. What older sister misses her baby sister's sweet sixteenth?"

"The kind of sister that escaped that life for the good; do you honestly think that once she got to college and experienced freedom, she still blamed you for never going back? She was sixteen, Iris, what were you doing at sixteen?"

"I promise you don't want to know the answer to that question, Nath," I say with a slight laugh, "I guess you're right, but she could be anywhere, even London."

"Really?"

"She wants to become a writer," I nod, "She's always wanted to go to London to study, so I wouldn't be surprised if she went through with the dream."

"Please send the message, sweetheart," he looks at me seriously, "She's eighteen now, she will hear you out and you deserve to have some family here too."

"I have you and the girls," I butter him up in a way so I don't have to do this.

"Nice try," he scoffs, pointing at my phone, "Text her, she's your sister, Iris. And if she has no plans, I'll cover the cost of the return ticket here, wherever she is."

"You don't need to do that," I tell him, grabbing my phone before he does.

"I know I don't; I want to though."

"I'll message her," I tell him as my nerves spiral through me. I'm scared to do so, but maybe he is right, maybe just maybe, she will hear me out.

Before I back out, I open my phone and search through my contacts until I reach Amelia Rhodes.

Me:

'hey, i know the last time we spoke, you didn't want to hear from me and you had every right to feel that way, but i miss you so much, jellytot. the holidays are coming up and if you have no plans, id like it if you visited. let me know... or don't. it's iris by the way, i'm not sure if you still have my number.'

"There, done," I put my phone down and pick up the last bit of toast I have left.

Nathan's arms wrap around me from behind and he kisses the top of my head, "I'm proud of you, baby."

I hold onto his arm, so he doesn't leave me just yet, "Thank you for the gentle push, I needed it."

"That's what I'm here for," he whispers and I can tell in the change of his tone he's smiling when he adds, "Do you also need to be reminded that we're leaving for our date in two hours?"

"What?!" I remove his arms from me and turn around, "I still need to shower, Nathan!"

"Then aren't you glad I reminded you?"

"I haven't even planned my outfit," I stand and begin to pace, "I'm going to look terrible."

He pulls me to a stop, holding me by my shoulders, "Before you send yourself into premature labour, breathe. You could wear one of my shirts and still look incredible to me, so why don't you get in the shower and I'll look through your closet for something?"

"I don't have many options," I mumble, looking up at him.

"If it's stretchy, it's an option, right?"

"That's right," I nod.

"Go shower, I've got this," he kisses my lips gently before he sends me on my way, following behind.

The shower takes my mind off of everything, helping my anxiety and nerves from earlier. Once my hair is washed and I've shaved what I can still reach, I just stand there, allowing the pressure of the water to massage my shoulder and back muscles. I end up staying in for longer than necessary, but I hold no regrets because when I get out of the shower, I feel refreshed.

Once I've dried myself down in the bathroom, I walk into my bedroom and I find a red dress waiting for me, folded on the bed next to some black heels that Nathan picked out. I pick up the dress and assess if it'll work with the bump; it's a sleeved bodycon dress, so it should just adjust to my shape.

"You've done well, Fields," I mumble to myself, folding the item back on my bed for when I need to get dressed.

Firstly, though, I need to dry my hair and start on makeup, so like always, I sit down in front of my mirror and slide everything I need over to me. I'm aware I won't be able to get up from the floor when I'm further along in pregnancy, but while I still can, I will continue to do so because I love sitting on the floor to get ready.

✯✯✯

With my heels in hand, I tread down the stairs barefoot and only when I get to the bottom step, do I sit and put them on. They're not extremely high, but I'm not risking my life walking down the stairs.

Nathan steps out of the kitchen as soon as he hears me coming, looking incredibly handsome in a dashing black suit. The sight of him makes me want to drag him up to bed, never mind going out and waiting until tonight to do so, but instead, I compose myself and walk over to him.

"You look stunning, Iris," he kisses my cheek, avoiding messing up my lipstick.

"And you look very handsome," I gently tug at the jacket, smoothing it down over his chest before I look up at him, "I love this suit."

"It's a special occasion, it's not every day I get to take a beautiful woman to dinner," his hands wander down my back as he speaks, "I knew this dress would be perfect."

"Only just," I look down at my bump, it's the first time I've worn anything that showcases it.

"We should get going, our reservation is in half an hour; have you got everything?" he double-checks with me.

"I do, I'm good," I nod, "Have you?"

"I'm pretty sure, yeah, so I'll lock up, you go get in the car and get warm."

That is exactly what we do and as soon as he locks up, we set off into the city. I don't have a single idea where we're going, I'm completely in the dark about tonight, but I'm not bothered in asking because as long as I'm with Nathan, that's enough.

We arrive at the restaurant with ten minutes spare before our reservation, so instead of using the valet service and waiting for a table, he parks in the parking lot and we spend a few minutes in the privacy of his car.

"I'm looking forward to dinner, I'm hungry already," I had my toast a little under two hours ago, but growing babies is hungry work.

"You're going to enjoy it; I've wanted to bring you here since your sickness got better but with work and the kids, we just haven't had the time until now," he tells me, turning the car off, "I've only been here once with some teammates, but the food is amazing."

My stomach rumbles at the simple mention of food, "I can't wait, which is why I'm going to need you to please change the subject before I die of starvation or throw up in your nice car."

"That we don't need, so yes I shall change the subject; have you got a reply from Amelia yet?" he asks me, but it's the last thing I expected him to bring up.

"I'm not sure, but even if she has, I don't want to ruin tonight, so I'll check it in the morning."

"How about I check your phone now for you, if she's replied and it's bad, I'll delete the message altogether so that way it will never hurt you and we can move on together?" he suggests.

I glance at him, he only wants the best for me and this is the kindest way for my heart, so I take my phone out of my purse and hand him it once it's unlocked, "Don't tell me if she has or not, just delete it and lie."

After a few seconds of silence, he replies, passing the phone back to me with a smile on his face, "I won't need to do either."

I open the conversation and see a large paragraph in response staring back at me.

Me:

'hey, i know the last time we spoke, you didn't want to hear from me and you had every right to feel that way, but i miss you so much, jellytot. the holidays are coming up and if you have no plans, id like it if you visited. let me know... or don't. it's iris by the way, i'm not sure if you still have my number.'

Amelia:

'The last time we spoke I was sixteen years old and a hormonal teenager, though I hate to admit so. I was really mad at you because you were the only person I wanted to be at my party and you didn't show up. I understand why now though, I was still very naive, I thought how we grew up was okay until I moved to London. I know you tried your best to make my childhood as normal as it could be, but I also know now how exhausting it must have been. I've never felt freer in the last few months, so I can't imagine how it felt for you, so I don't blame you at all anymore. I understand why you didn't come back and I miss you too, so much. I'd love to come visit for Thanksgiving but I can't afford to, but as soon as I can, I promise I will. I love you, Iris, thank you for reaching out.'

My eyes are brimming with tears by the time I've finished reading the last sentence and I let out a large sigh of relief; she doesn't hate me and she's more than happy to see me again.

"We should go to our table now, baby, the reservation is in two minutes, but we'll ring her tomorrow and figure out the flights; you're going to be reunited with her very soon," he tells me like a promise.

"I can't believe she's in London, I'm so proud of her," I blink away the tears that didn't fall, and then look back over at Nathan, "Thank you so much, Nath."

"You're more than welcome," he leans over the centre console and gently cups my face in his hands, kissing me sweetly, "I've been wanting to do that all night."

He doesn't give me time to reply before he's out of the car and I smile when he walks around to open my door for me.

"You're such a gentleman," I muse, climbing out of the car.

"Always," his hand slips into mine and his thumb gently strokes over my index finger as we make our way over to the entrance of the restaurant.

He leads, speaking for us with the staff and I follow his lead, my hand holding his until we get seated at a table in a booth, where I happily sit with Nathan sitting opposite.

It doesn't take us long to choose our three courses, so he orders for us and also gets a bottle of non-alcoholic sparkling wine for the table.

"Thank you so much for this," I take his hand across the table and start to fiddle with his rings, "I don't need to be wined and dined, I'm not that type of girl, but that doesn't mean things like this doesn't make me happy; and I'm so happy with you, Nath."

"I know you're not that type of girl, Iris, and it's why you're so perfect. I want to do this, I want to wine and dine you, to keep you happy, I'd do this every night if I could, but I know I don't have to," he chuckles before he says, "You are a woman who is more than happy with buttered toast in bed with a movie, and that's all I've ever wanted; that brings me more joy. You're not here because of my money or fame, and it's so refreshing to have met someone who only wants me and not that."

"We're each other's bees in this wild world."

He smiles at the use of my recurring metaphor from months ago when I was so terrified to let another man back in my life, "Yeah, I think we are."

~~~~~

A/N

So... we're officially half way through the book! In total there are going to be 39 chapters and an epilogue, I'm so proud of myself for getting this far with this story and I love this chapter so much and I hope you do too.

The reunion between Amelia and Iris is happening soon!

Hope everyone is enjoying so far, does anyone have a favourite character?

~ B