Anyone who tells you that food doesn't help solve your problems is either a liar, uneducated, or in denial. That, or they're just eating the wrong food, because let me tell you, these beignets sure as hell make me feel less like shit. For those of you who don't know, a beignet is rectangular donut that is deep fried and dowsed in a mountain of powered sugar, and here at the world famous Cafe du Monde in New Orleans, Louisiana, they load these babies high with sugar to the point where you look at it and think, "Nah, fam. That's too much." But then once you get in there, you find yourself dipping the fried bread in the leftover sugar on the plate just to get a bit more. It's so incredible that you entirely forget how bad it is for you. At least, I find myself forgetting it, because right now, I'm on my fourth one and I'm still going strong.

"This is like cocaine," Alexa moans in pleasure as she takes another bite of the hot pastry. Oh, that's the other thing: they're hot too, so when you eat one it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

"I know, right." I smile contently, licking the sugar from my fingers and picking up my ridiculously small water glass. "I want another, but I know I'll regret it."

Alexa giggles, "Will you, though?"

I shrug, "Probably not, but I have to say that to at least seem healthy."

"We're eating donuts at one in the morning," she states amusedly. "I don't think we have to hide the fact that we're unhealthy at this point."

"This is very true," I laugh, draining the rest of my water and setting the cup on the table. There is no more water and no more beignets... which means only one thing. Alexa and I are about talk about all the shit that just went down, and it's going to be a bit of a bumpy ride.

As my troubled thoughts begin to come back to me, I fall silent and absentmindedly stare off at the towering cathedral across the street. Its white facade is all lit up in the darkness, and the faint sound of people shouting and jazz music fills the still night with a bit of excitement. I like the quietness of where we are right now, though. It's enabling me to just think and clear my head. I'm really just trying to analyze the whole night as much as possible, just so I can ensure that I'm not overreacting. I left kind of abruptly, which I probably shouldn't have done, but I was just so thrown off guard by everything that I really needed to get out of there.

I don't think I overreacted though. First off, I really did need to get Alexa out of that bathroom, so if worse comes to worse and I end up being insane, at least I can lean on that motive for a rational reason for leaving. Now that I think about the rest of it though, I really don't know if I should have trusted John when it came to Harry and his little tryst with Gabrielle. Clearly, John's main goal was to get to me, so it wouldn't be insane for him to lie to get what he wants. But there is also the fact that Mark did see Gabrielle go off with Harry after I went to check on Alexa, so I'm really not sure what to believe anymore. I should have stayed and talked to Harry like a normal human; I know that. But alas, I was hurt and angry, and I acted rashly. It's too late to change it now, but I do wish I had handled things differently.

As I turn my attention back to Alexa, I'm suddenly overcome with a dominating sense of guilt and anxiety. She looks so small and so fragile right now, and I really don't know if now is the time to tell her that her asshat of a boyfriend cheated on her. Her night has been hard enough as it is, what with John leaving her and her little visitation to the other John where she puked her guts out. I don't want to add to her distress, but I also don't want to ever have to have the "you knew and didn't tell me???" conversation with her, because those annoy the shit out of me. If you know something that you are obligated to share, then share it, dammit. That whole "I was trying to protect you" spiel is bullshit, and I am not about to buy into it.

"Hey, Alexa?" I begin quietly, dreading the conversation that is to follow.

She looks up at me and lazily smiles. "If you ask me to play 'Despacito' again, I'm not going to. That was a one-time thing." Alexa giggles animatedly despite the fact that her eyes are drooping shut just a bit. I guess she's still really drunk. Is she too drunk to have this conversation, though? That definitely would be a good reason to wait until tomorrow to tell her about John's cheating. I don't want to upset her more than she already is when she's not in her right mind.

No, Cam. That would fall under the "trying to protect her" category. You have to tell her.

"Don't worry," I say nervously. "I won't. I just–"

No, I decide. She needs to sober up a little more before I go on. I'll tell her tonight, but I need to wait an hour. I'll tell her once we get to the hotel. Yes, that is a good plan.

"Did you want more coffee? It'll help sober you up. Or more water?"

She bites the inside of her lip and forces her eyes fully open, "I'll finish this coffee, but yeah, a big water would be nice."

Nodding, I stand and walk back to the kitchen where the servers are congregated there. I acquire a large plastic cup full of iced water, then return to Alexa. We sit in silence long enough for Alexa to finish both her coffee and half of her water before she looks up at me with wide eyes, like she's suddenly realized something. I think the coffee has done its job, and she has remembered the fact that we're supposed to be talking all the shit that happened this evening. I sure hope not, because this girl needs more time to process all the liquor in her blood.

"Wait!" Alexa exclaims, setting her cup down aggressively on the table. The few people around the restaurant give her a strange look but nonetheless turn their attention back to their coffee and beignets. "What happened to Harry? Why'd you ditch him? I thought you loved him?"

What the shit? How could she know that I love him?

"Oh," I sigh and cast my eyes on the ground. I don't know if I can look at her while I tell her any of this. It's all much to painful to begin to think about, so I'm really struggling with where I should start. I don't want to make her think that she was the reason for all the drama, but given that it all started after she left to go to the bathroom, I kind of think she might see it that way. Well, I guess it doesn't really matter how she sees it; I have to tell her the truth.

"I don't really know how to say this, but I think Harry cheated on me with Gabrielle." Alexa's eyes go wide and her mouth falls open in surprise. "But now I'm not so sure; I shouldn't have trusted the person who told me."

Alexa cocks her head to the side, "Wait, who told you?"

"Well," I hesitate, for the first time taking notice of my phone laying face down on the table. "John told me he saw Harry making out with Gabrielle, and then I saw Harry with lipstick all over his face, but now that I think about it, I'm not really sure what I saw. The lights were all weird in there and I was still kind of drunk, so I could have imagined it or something. It could have even been my lipstick; I just don't know."

Alexa stares at me blankly and bites down on her lip, "I don't mean to make things worse, but isn't your lipstick one of those impossible-to-remove liquid lips? Because it's still perfectly in place."

Ugh, yeah, it is, but I'm trying to be positive.

I nod slowly and Alexa frowns. She finishes off her water then crosses her arms over her chest, "I think it might be smart to prepare yourself for the worst then. John always did talk about how he hated Harry for using you. I mean, I know part of his hatred had to do with the fact that he's jealous of him, but I think there was more to it than just his obsession with you."

No, don't tell me that.

Unsure of what to say, I pick my phone up off of the table and see a full screen of notifications. There's twenty-four messages and nine phone calls from Harry as well as some from a few numbers I don't recognize. There's even one from Gabrielle. The sight of her name on my screen makes me nearly want to throw my phone across the restaurant. The only reason I don't is because there are people here and I'm too poor to afford a new one. One of these days, I'll have a dramatic phone throw and it will be glorious.

I unlock my phone, and as I do, Harry's name pops up again.

"Is he calling you?" Alexa asks, and I nod. "You should answer it. He's probably confused."

Oh, fuck. I know she's right, but Harry is probably so pissed at me right now that I don't know if I can answer it. Everything I've done tonight really has been a mistake, and now I'm having to face the consequences. Fucking hell. I guess that's how real life is though.

Though it's the very last thing I want to do, I press the green accept button and hold the phone up to my ear, awaiting the sound of Harry's aggravated voice on the other end. But the voice that comes through isn't Harry's.

"Camryn, thank God," the male voice says, clearly relieved. "Why the hell haven't you picked up your phone?"

"Oh," I stutter, momentarily forgetting how to speak. "I- I forgot to look at it. Who even is this?"

"This is Mark." He adds sternly, "I'm coming to get you. Is Alexa with you?"

"Yes, but I- how do you know where I am? And why do you have Harry's phone?" This is becoming increasingly suspicious and concerning. Where the hell is Harry?

"Harry's at the hospital," Mark says curtly, like it's the most nonchalant thing in the world. My heart drops in my chest, and I look worriedly at Alexa who probably thinks I'm going insane by how distraught I currently am. All the shit with Gabrielle and John vanishes from my mind in an instant, and my sole focus is placed on Harry. All that matters now is if he's okay, because none of this petty shit between us means anything at all in the long run.

"What do you mean he's at the hospital? What happened?" I ask, but Mark ignores me.

"I'm coming to get you," he says. "And I'm almost at the cafe, so be outside in four minutes."

What the shit is happening? What happened to Harry? And how does Mark know where I am?

Mark hangs up the phone before I can ask him anything else, and Alexa looks at me with a confused and worried expression on her face.

"What's wrong?" She questions me, her eyes now fully open. I think she really is sobering up way faster than I expected her to. "Who's at the hospital?"

My heart is beating a million beats per minute, and I'm so distracted by the pounding in my ears that I hardly notice Alexa's question, much less know how to answer it. I have no idea what's going on, but I know Mark is going to be here in four minutes and that Harry is in the hospital. I guess I'll just have to wait until then to find out what all has gone down since I left.

"Harry," I choke out, lifting my eyes to her and standing from my chair.

"What?" Alexa asks incredulously. "What happened?"

"I don't know," I sigh, taking my credit card from the sleeve on the back of phone case. "I have to pay, and then Mark is going to pick us up. I'll get you another water, too."

With that, I take Alexa's cup and return to the front counter where I pay and get a refill. I realize that this is a lot of liquids for her, but she needs it if she's going to avoid a hangover tomorrow. Come to think of it, I probably should have a little more myself. I buy a water for myself and walk back to Alexa before making our way outside. Not even a minute passes before a janky green Kia pulls up to the curb and Mark steps out of the back seat, instructing us to take his place. He shuts the door once we are inside and wordlessly takes his place in the passenger's seat. I guess we're in a Uber because this guy is a middle-aged white dude in a hoodie with a really bad beard.

Once we're on our way towards what I assume is the hospital, I decide to pester Mark with the questions he didn't answer over the phone.

"Mark, are you going to tell me what happened now?" I ask him, leaning forward in my seat to look at him. "Is Harry okay?"

Mark scoffs rudely and stares Steiger ahead at the road, "Yeah, his face is a little fucked up, but he's fine."

Oh, thank God. I'm really glad to hear that Harry isn't dead or something, because I was really beginning to worry since no one was telling me anything. I wonder what happened to his face, though. I really hope he didn't get into a fight with someone, because that would be potentially problematic. I mean, I don't think I'd really care about the ethics of him getting into a fight; it'd just be messy. Like, there could be legal issues to deal with, and I really don't want Harry to get in trouble.

"How'd it happen?"

Mark shrugs, not looking back to me, "I don't know; he won't tell anyone."

Okay, at least it probably wasn't a fight, then. People would have seen a big-ass fight in the middle of a club, so I think I can rule that possibility out. I want to ask Mark more about it, but clearly, he doesn't even know himself. I am wondering how the hell he knew where I was though, so I will ask about that.

"How did you find us?" I question him, and though I can feel him getting even more frustrated with me, I don't back down on attaining an answer.

So much for making a good impression on Harry's friends.

"You let Harry track your location on Snap Maps, so he gave me his phone to find you." Mark turns around and looks at me, "Look, Camryn, I don't mean to be rude, but you'll find out everything once we get to the hospital, so can you just chill for like five minutes? You've kind of made a mess out of tonight, and I don't want to yell at you because Harry would kill me if I did."

I've made a mess? I mean, yeah, I know I fucked up by leaving without telling Harry, but what the fuck have I done besides that? I've only tried to help Alexa, so I really don't know how that could be bad.

Despite the fact that I now have a million more questions, I fall silent to comply with Mark's rather blunt request. I get that he'd rather be back at the party, but I bet Harry had a good reason for dragging him to the hospital with him. I do feel a little guilty about not answering my phone, though. If I had answered, then maybe Mark wouldn't have come to get me, and maybe he wouldn't have been in such a pissy mood.

The rest of the ride is silent except for the weird slow music that sounds over the speakers in the car. This driver is into some depressing music, and it's really making this night seem much worse than it is. Alexa and I sit still beside each other, sipping on our waters until we arrive at our destination. When we walk inside the hospital, people are giving us a mixture of confused and dirty looks; I don't know what their problem is, but I guess it's not normal to see such formally dressed college kids at the hospital at nearly two in the morning.

Mark leads us through the lobby and to the elevator that takes us up to the second floor. My heart is pounding as the silence between the three of us continues to lengthen, and I find myself only thinking about Harry. I know Mark said he was okay, but I can't help but be worried about him. I'm also extremely worried about what he's going to say to me. I left without telling him like an idiot, so I think it's safe to say that he is not going to be pleased with me. I sure as hell would be pissed with him if he had done what I have, so I know that I can't even begin to justify my actions. Regardless of what he may have done with Gabrielle, I shouldn't have behaved so rashly, because if he's innocent, then I really have overreacted.

And though I have no reason to, as the night has progressed and I have gained back my sobriety, I have this feeling in the pit of my stomach that tells me he is innocent. After the wonderful time at the beach with him, I realized that he just might be in this with me for the long run, so he would have no reason to want to hook up with Gabrielle. I have no reason to believe anything John has said to me tonight or really ever, and given that he is the only reason that I even suspected a thing between Harry and Gabrielle, I think it's safe to assume that John's words to me were just an attempt to get to me.

For fuck's sake, I just need some answers and some peace of mind. Hopefully, once I find Harry, he can give them to me.

•••

I'm actually shook that I finished a chapter this week. I've literally been in a workshop from nine in the morning to eight at night every day since Sunday and I am so exhausted 😭😭 the only thing keeping me alive at this point is the promise of sleep and cookies😂

Anyways, I love you guys! Thanks for reading!
-Kate❤️