Thank you all so much for the votes and comments! Also, love love love the attached cover :)

10/27/2020 - Went ahead and gave y'all another quick edit! Please don't be afraid to comment, comment, comment!

Silently Falling: Chapter Twenty Three

The car ride was fairly silent. The only time West spoke was to ask me if I was cold. I nodded off and fell into a light sleep for the last hour, but when West hit the familiar bump that tells me we've turned onto my street so I yawn and sit up slightly. Thankfully it's not raining here, but I can tell from the dark clouds that the storm followed us home and it may start raining soon.

I see Toby's truck in the driveway and I cringe when I realize I never texted him where I was headed. But, I hope he at least remembers what today is and put two and two together. 

"You going to be okay, Sunshine?" West asks as he shuts his Jeep off and looks at me.

I take a deep breath as I stare up at my house and force myself to nod. We get out of West's Jeep and he walks me to the front door. Both of our clothes are still soaked and it's causing me to shiver like crazy. When we walk up the front steps, I pause and turn to him before heading inside.

"Thank you again, West. For being there for me. I know it may have been a lot...to see me like that." 

I suddenly look away from him as I realize that he really did witness me completely break down. But West steps closer to me and takes my hand in his, causing me to look at him.

"Don't look embarrassed, Sunshine. You have no reason to be," he says seriously. "Sometimes we have to let it all out."

Not knowing what to say in response, I choose to wrap my arms around his torso and hug him. He doesn't hesitate at all and hugs me back, cradling my head that's tucked into his shoulder. The heartache that today brings is still there, but snuggled into his warmth allows me to escape the worst of it. 

When we pull apart West stares down at me with soft, unreadable eyes. He tucks some of my damp hair behind my ear, causing my pulse to quicken from his soft touch, and rests his hand on my cheek. My heart pounds harder while he looks at me before my eyes flutter shut as he leans in and softly kisses my forehead. His warm lips graze my skin as he lightly presses them against my forehead, letting them linger for a few seconds. 

When he pulls back I open my eyes to see his small smile, and his hand falls back down to his side. I'm too shocked to move or sign anything in response, but my body is on fire with the lasting feeling of his lips against my skin. After a few silent moments, West takes a step back and puts his hands in his pockets as his smile melts into a small, playful smirk. 

"Forehead is a little hot, you should get inside and into some warm clothes to make sure you really don't catch a cold."

Then he starts down the front porch steps and to his Jeep, sending me one more smile.

"I'll see you at school, Sunshine," he calls just before shutting the door and driving off. 

With flushed cheeks, I gently lift my hand to my forehead and graze my fingers across his kiss. But before I have time to even think about it, the front door swings open and I turn to see a very disheveled Toby with wide, frantic eyes.

"Raine! Oh my God, where have you been? I've been trying to call you."  

My brows knit together as I stare at him, waiting for him to understand what today is. What it means to me. Where it took me. But when that realization never reaches his eyes, I brush past him to go inside as I sign.

"I was at mom's grave." 

I go upstairs to change out of my wet clothes and trade them for sweatpants and a different hoodie that I stole from my Dad's closet. Then, I decide to head back downstairs and talk to Toby.

When I reach the bottom step, I see Toby sitting hunched over on the couch, his hands deep in his hair as he stares at the coffee table.

"I..." He begins, swallowing. "I didn't even remember it was her anniversary." He says almost to himself.

I look down and then back at him as he shakes his head in disbelief.

"I've never missed an anniversary." He says. "I drive you every year."

I slowly walk into the living room and stand in front of him. He doesn't look up, just squints at the carpet for a few silent moments.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, finally looking up at me. He shakes his head and opens his mouth, but pauses and his eyes trail around the room. "I'm sorry."

I frown deeply and sit down next to him, placing my hand comfortingly on his back. He looks over at me and I see the regret that clouds his eyes. I offer a small nod and the ghost of a forgiving smile, and pull him towards me. He rests his head on my shoulder and I rest my chin atop his head as I rub his back.

"I miss her." He says quietly.

I miss her too.

"I wish she was still here."

I know.

"Why did this have to happen to us?"

I'm sorry.

OoO

Toby and I ended up staying downstairs as we recalled memories of Mom. Anything we could remember. We even FaceTimed Dad so that he could tell us more stories about her, ones we had heard a thousand times before and some that he had never told us. This particular anniversary of her death is one I won't forget. 

Now it's Monday and we're pulling into the parking lot. Tyler and Gray are already hanging out by Toby's parking spot, waiting for us to pull up. As soon as we get out, Tyler is at my side and offers to take my backpack for me. 

"That's okay, I've got it." I sign after putting it on my back, giving him a small smile. 

He shrugs and throws an arm around my shoulders as we walk towards the school doors. 

"How was your weekend?" He asks.

"It was...good." 

You know, other than the mental breakdown I had in the pouring rain at my mom's grave on her death anniversary while West sat in his Jeep and watched. 

"Did you do the calculus homework?" Gray asks, walking on my other side as we catch up to Toby and Alyse who are laughing together up ahead.

I nod, "But I wasn't able to get a few."

He sighs, "Same."

Tyler looks down at me. "I kinda didn't get any of them. Wanna help me out and give me whatever answers you have?"

I sigh at him, "We do this every week."

"How about to make it up to you, I'll buy you a new Mockingjay DVD? I know your old one got scratched and doesn't work anymore." 

I stay quiet to see how much more I can get out of him.

"Okay...How about I buy you that DVD and I take you out to dinner?" He offers.

I chuckle lightly, but I feel an awkward weight placed on my shoulders. Tyler, over the last couple of weeks, has been awfully flirtatious with me and it's unlike him. Before I have a chance to respond, not that I know exactly what I would have said, someone else does.

"Sounds lovely, where are we going?" West answers.

I perk up when I see him walk to us, sending me a discreet wink.

Tyler coughs awkwardly. "Well, I was actually talking about just me and-"

"Hey, sis, come here for a second." Toby calls, cutting Tyler off.

I nod at him and Tyler's arm falls from my shoulders. I pick up my pace to catch up to him and Alyse, but West stops me before I do.

"Hey, are you okay?" He asks quietly, referring to yesterday. 

"I'm okay. We called our Dad and talked with him for a long time on FaceTime, it ended up being a great day of remembrance." 

West smiles, but all too soon it melts into a smirk as his eyes turn mischievous. "I'm glad, but I was more referring to that oncoming fever I sensed. Or was that just from your massive blush?"

I gape at him, once again unable to come up with any sort of response which only makes his smirk deepen as he points at my face.

"Yeah, that's the one." 

My hands come up to my cheeks that are warm to the touch and it only makes my blush worsen. West starts laughing and nudges me as we walk towards Toby and Alyse with Gray and Tyler trailing behind us. 

"Hey West," Toby says once we reach them. "I never thanked you for driving Raine yesterday, so...thanks man. You were there for her."

West smiles and glances down at me, "Don't mention it." 

"Raine I saw your text asking me to drive you when I woke up," Tyler quickly interjects. "If I had woken up earlier I would have driven you, you know that."

"I know. I just needed to go right away."

"Why were you up so early, anyway?" Tyler asks West.

West crosses his arms over his chest, "Well, 9 isn't that early, but my little brother insisted on waking me up at 8 so that we could watch Spongebob together." 

I chuckle as I imagine Casper running into West's room and forcing him awake all just for a TV show. And I bet West doesn't put up much of an argument to it, either. Even from such a small interaction at my dinner with them, I can tell Casper has West wrapped around his finger. 

"So this party coming up on Friday." Gray begins, changing the course of the conversation.

"Gray, it's literally Monday," Alyse says.

"Your point?" 

She puts her hands up in surrender and he continues.

"Kyle is hosting. Some guys on the basketball team convinced him to host a party while his parents are away for the weekend. We need a DD, so West I was hoping you'd offer."

"Offering and being asked are two different things," West says.

"Sooo, is that a yes? You'll go and then drive us all home?" 

West rolls his eyes but I see the smile playing at the corner of his mouth. "Sure, you guys need to get home somehow." 

Alyse chuckles, "Who would have thought West Love to be the designated driver at parties?"

"Who would have thought West Love to do a lot of the things he does." I sign.

The others continue to talk about the party, but my comment catches West's attention. 

He looks down at me and tilts his head. "Like what?"

My mind is instantly met with every moment we've shared together where he's proven he's not at all what I first thought. Him singing my songs, me meeting his family, and yesterday...it's all proven that there is so much more to West Love than the rumors say.

He stares at me for a few seconds. "Like care about you?" He suggests.

I can feel Tyler's eyes burning holes into me, but I conveniently avoid his gaze and instead focus on West as I fight back a blush. I smile sheepishly at him.

"I was going to say like learn ASL."

Before West can respond, everyone's conversation is cut off by seductive giggling and Tina saunters over to us. She places her hand seductively on Tyler's arm, finally breaking his gaze from being stuck on me to regretfully going to her. 

"Hey Ty," she drawls. "Sorry to interrupt, but I was wondering if we could...erm... talk?" She asks, batting her eyelashes.

He smirks at her and his hand instantly comes to land on her waist. He glances between West and myself, a flash of pain going across his eyes, and then he looks back down at Tina.

"I'll catch y'all later." He says huskily, walking down the hall with her attached to his hip.

I watch Tyler walk away. He has become awfully hard to read. He's started flirting with me more, which has given both me and Alyse the suspicion that he may have developed feelings for me, yet he hasn't backed off on sleeping around and flirting with other girls. Before, our friendship was easy because he didn't flirt, now...things are getting a little odd. 

"So, the party is at Kyle's Friday night?" Toby confirms with Gray.

"Yeah, plans seem to be set in stone." 

West looks over at me. "Are you gonna go, Sunshine?" He asks.

My body nearly jumps from the shock of the question and I snap my eyes to West. He's staring closely at me; examining me and my response. He's testing me. He's already proven he cares about me and he clearly wants to see how much I'm willing to extend the trust that goes with that. 

I've already told West so much about me, but is it possible he knows there's something major that I'm leaving out? And how much longer can I hide that secret of mine? I'm once again reminded of the dangers of letting West get so close to me. Reminded of the vulnerability that I'm exposing myself to by being friends with him and teetering on the edge of wanting more. 

But I start thinking about how angry I was at myself yesterday; about how much my breakdown came from my frustration towards being unable to talk over one stupid night. It's true that I've let that night control me. Hell, it took my voice away. Can I really let it control my relationship with West, too? 

So, instead of cowering away like I have for the last three years and letting that one fateful night win, I meet the challenge head on.

"Sure, why not?"

I think it's about time I face that particular fear of mine.

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10/27/2020 - I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter :) I did some dialogue edits, but nothing major in the plot was altered. I simply added a scene in the beginning between Raine and West, and I made Raine's decision to go to the party more important (since it's a huge deal). Before, she pretty much just said "yeah okay Imma go why not?" and that clearly wasn't a very reasonable reaction... So, let me know what you thought!