Sodapop's POV

That afternoon, I was still kinda mad at Ponyboy and Darry. All three of us were watching some movie on TV. Well, Pony was the only one really watching it. I've seen this movie before with Steve before, and Darry was passed on the couch. Ponyboy was curled up against Darry, giggling at the TV, and, of course, holding his dream catcher.

I glared at them. Now I knew that Pony preferred Darry over me. He'd rather cuddle with Darry, who was asleep, than me, who was awake and can actually do stuff with him right now.

After a few moments, Darry woke up. He saw Ponyboy and chuckled. "Hey Pones!" He chuckled sleepily. Darry tossed Ponyboy in the air. Even though he was fourteen, Pony was light enough for us to pick him up.

I scoffed and turned away from them, feeling the jealousy grow inside of me. "What's wrong, little buddy?" I heard Darry ask me. "Nothing..." I mumbled angrily.

--

About an hour later, I felt Ponyboy tug at me as I did the bills. It's usually Darry who does them, but I decided to give him a break today, since he does them all the time. I was still upset and was concerned why Pony wants to play with me now. "I'm busy right now Pones.." I said, growling lightly. 'You prefer Darry over me anyway.' I thought.

Ponyboy hugged me tight. I felt the wooden dream catcher against my neck. That's when I snapped. I stood up, Pony's arms still around me, and shoved him off, hard. "I TOLD YOU I'M BUSY YOU BRAT! GO AWAY!" I screamed. He fell to the floor with a thump. It wasn't until it was too late when I realized what I did.

Suddenly, Ponyboy's eyes grew wide and filled with tears. He swiftly backed away and his breath quickened. That's when I realized I did something more than shove Pony.

I triggered Ponyboy.

Immediately, Pony started bawling and shrieking at the top of his lungs. This was the worst panic attack I've ever seen him have. I walked over to him and tried comforting him, but he just shrieked louder and shoved me away.

Darry came running in. He saw Ponyboy having a panic attack and quickly scooped him up. Pony cling to Darry for dear life and bawled harder and louder. "Shh....everything's okay....you're okay Little Colt...no one's gonna hurt you....shh...shh...you're safe..." Darry cooed, rubbing his back. Ponyboy looked up and pointed to me, then imitated me shoving him.

I saw Darry's eyes widen as he turned to me. "Did you shove him, Sodapop?" He growled. I gulped and nodded, looking down. "Sodapop Patrick Curtis go to your room now!" Darry roared. His voice made Pony shriek and cry louder. Darry realized his mistake and hugged Pony close, stroking his hair. "Darry, I'm sixteen, not six." I replied, crossing my arms. "NOW SODA!" Darry yelled.

--

I could still hear Ponyboy having a panic attack as I sat in my room. Honestly, I felt bad for yelling at Pony, but I was still upset. Why doesn't he like me anymore? He always with Darry now. Whenever he has nightmares, somehow, Darry always gets to Ponyboy's room first to soothe him, and by the time I get there, Pony's either already relaxed or asleep. I never get a chance to do anything with him anymore and it's so unfair! I can't take it no more!

Ponyboy's panic attack eventually ended, and minutes later, I heard my bedroom door open. It was Pony. He was standing against the door frame, whimpering quietly. He had a piece of paper in his hands. He looked so small and scared, his eyes wide with fear and his whole body shaking.

I got up slowly and knelt down in front of him. "Hey honey..." I said in a gentle and calming voice. Ponyboy whimpered louder and curled up into a ball. Then, Darry approached him slowly and knelt down too, rubbing his back. "You can do it Pones, there ain't anything to be scared of right now." He told him. "Go 'head and give Soda the paper."

Pony looked at me and crawled over, handing me the paper. I read it over. It said, 'I'm sorry Soda.....' in big green letters with a sad looking horse on it. Honestly, Pony's card made me smile, but he didn't have anything to be sorry for. I'm the one who pushed him and triggered his panic attack.

I pulled Ponyboy into my lap and hugged him tight, giving him a big kiss on his cheek. "Oh little brother..." I said. "You ain't got a thing to be sorry for. I'm the one who should be sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you like that, I was just frustrated because...well...do you love me Pony? Do you love me and Darry equally?" Darry gasped and scooted towards us. "What're ya talkin' 'bout little buddy?" He asked.

Pony nodded eagerly and smiled big. He kissed my cheek. I knew then that Pony actually did love me. Darry pulled both of us close to him and hugged his real tight. "And I love both my kid brothers. Equally." I chuckled.

Ponyboy then pulled out something from his pocket and showed it to me. I frowned when I realized that it was his dream catcher, broken. Ponyboy must've dropped it when I pushed him and I probably stepped on it by accident as I walked to my room.

"Oh Pony, I'm so sorry..." I said, taking the dream catcher. "Don't worry, I'll fix it up for you right now." I got up and headed to the kitchen, quickly fixing it. It wasn't that badly damaged. "Here ya go Ponyboy." I said, handing it back to him. He giggled and hugged it, running away to draw another picture of it.

~ TJ