A/N: Based off the episode 1x24 "Performance'' from the TV series Young Justice.

*Contains self harm and thoughts of suicide and actions*

M'gann used her telekinesis to save Robin and to pull him to safety. He gave her a small smile to thank her for saving him, which he totally didn't want to happen by the way.

Yeah he was terrified of falling and dying just like they did, but being back here, it brought up a lot of stuff and right now all Dick really wanted was to fall and die, just like them, so he could be connected to them again, to see and be with them. To feel loved and wanted.

"Are you alright?" M'gann asked telepathically through the mind link. Robin nodded his head before speaking through the mind link to her.
"Yeah, I'm fine. But I think I caught that flu bug that's been going around the circus. But it doesn't matter, the show must go on'' Robin thought. He so badly wanted to add that he didn't matter but he couldn't because he couldn't worry her or the others or let them onto that fact that he wasn't alright and was currently having suicidal thoughts.

Sweat was rolling down his face. They both waved to the crowd and gave small smiles, Robin's body was beginning to shake, either due to the illness he might have caught or the fact that he almost died like them and was oddly okay with it, he wasn't sure.

They preformed a few more jumps and flips and each time Robin had to suppress the urge to not grab a hold of M'gann's hand or the bar. He sighed with relief as the night came to an end. They all slowly made it to the ground and waved at everyone in the crowd. 
M'gann looked over at him and could tell how sick he was but she could also feel something else, but she just couldn't put a finger on it.

"Wasn't sure you were going to make it through, you look pretty unwell'' said M'gann through the mind link.

"Neither did I'' said Robin who then closed his eyes and suddenly lean heavily against M'gann's shoulder, "help me backstage?" he asked.
"Of course'' said M'gann as they all headed out of the center ring and off into the distance, both M'gann and Artemis supporting Robin as he walked. 
his legs grew heavier and heavier by the second, they gave away once and almost hit his knees against the ground, before Conner stepped in and picked him up, carrying him bridal style towards their rooms.

Once inside the room, Robin was helped over to the bed and was laid down, within a few seconds of laying down on the bed, he was out like a light. His whole body relaxed as he slipped into the darkness of sleep. They others smiled down at him, Robin was so little, so young and cute. 
M'gann quickly stepped up as a mothering figure and got a cold wet cloth to lay across his burning forehead, trying to reduce some of his fever. She then gently pulled the covers over his small body and watched him sleep for a second before turning to face the others.

"Is everyone online?" asked M'gann and got a few nods. She glanced down at Robin then walked a little bit away from him, the others following silently behind her, trying their hardest to not wake their youngest teammate.
"Something is wrong'' she said.

"What is?" asked Conner and he and the others watched her as she looked over their shoulders at Robin then back at them.
"Is it the cold?" questioned Artemis but M'gann shook her head 'no'.

"It is something more. I...I can't really say or be sure but, during the performance I felt...fear from him'' she said and looked from the team to the floor.
"Well, he was falling towards the ground. He had no weapons or tools, he is after all human unlike you two'' said Roy through the mind link and pointed at both M'gann and Conner. Conner crossed his arms across his chest and glared at Roy.

"No, I know that and understand the reason for some fear but, I have never felt it from Robin before. Never. On all the missions we have been through together, I've never felt fear from him and especially not at how strong it was either. It was so powerful it made me feel terrible. But...there was something more and that's the worst of it. I can't...i don't understand it for one second." M'gann said.

"What?" questioned Artemis who was looking worried at M'gann and began to worry about her youngest team mate who she was recently thinking of as a little brother.

"I'm not sure, I could be mistaken but I thought I felt relief from him as well when he was falling. I don't know.'' she said through the mind link and everyone turned to face the now sleeping boy.

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Hours later in the night after the performance, Robin quickly woke up. He was sitting up in his bed panting like crazy, he let a small sob escape his lips along with a tiny scream. He quickly brought his warm hands to his eyes and closed his eyes tightly.
He then felt a hand upon his shoulder, causing him to jump slightly. He couldn't see who it was but whoever it was seemed familiar to him.

"Robin? Are you okay?" asked Artemis and Robin sighed in relief. She then quickly flipped the light switch on, flooding the room with a bright light. He closed his eyes for a second then re-opened them to adjust to the light.
"I-I...I heard you scream, just slightly. I just wanted to make sure everything was alright'' she said and he quickly signed but soon realized who he was with and pulled his phone out nd text on it quickly.

"It was just a nightmare, nothing to worry about. I'm fine.'' said Robin's phone and he glanced up at her and sent her a smile, trying to reassure her somewhat.

He then got up and tossed her her hero uniform. She nodded his head and set out to get changed. He changed quickly and went out to get the others, they were going to locate the thieves.

The team made it to a wearhouse, where they sat and waited for something to happened. As they sat there in their sections with their group, M'gann reached out and tapped Robin's shoulder getting attention. He turned to face he and tried to smile but it didn't form. He was still completely worn down, still feeling sick.

"How are you feeling?" asked M'gann.
"Lousy, actually'' Robin side in the mind link. He watched as he eyes widen, he never ever admitted to feeling anything but fine or asterous, this worried her greatly. "But, I'll manage'' he said to try and easy her concerns about him, she nodded her head and gave him a small smile but they both knew that she didn't believe him at all. He was struggling, a great deal and not just with the illness but with something else, something from within.

The team soon moved in on the wearhouse when someone entered it. 

Once inside, Robin pressed a button of his glove, letting out his famous chuckle, that frighten everyone.
"Caught red handed'' voiced Robin's wrist computer as the theft turned to face the team standing behind him. Suddenly, fire was shot their way and everyone jumped out of the blast.

Roy quickly yelled out to the team, telling them that the crates were full of live ammo, when just then the flames reached them and everything began to explode.
The wearhouse was engulfed in flames.

Luckily, the team was touched by the flames, however the fire was injuring M'gann who's weakness was fire. Robin drapped her arm over his shoulder as he stood up,pulling her up with him. Her eyes were closed and her head lopped to the side. Conner got up quickly and was about to chase after the criminal.

Robin stepped forward and with his other arm grabbed ahold of Superboy's arm, he yanked it quickly away from Robin's touch and sent the boy wonder a small glare. Robin shook his head 'no' then looked over at M'gann. With his one hand he signed 'no' to Conner, finally getting his attention.

As soon as Conner took M'gann out of the fire because it was killing her, Robin tried to continue on with the mission but quickly failed. 
"Artemis, Arrow, find the thief'' Robin typed out on his wrist computer, he took one step forward and groaned in pain and fell to the ground.

"Because he matters more than you?" Artemis said as she went to his side to help him, but caught Robin nodding his head 'yes' to her question. Her eyes widen but couldn't stay here at the moment and figure it out, the whole place was burning, they all needed to get out of there.

"You're still off your game, pal'' said Roy but Robin quickly shook his head 'no'. He then typed on his wrist computer as the two of them lifted him up onto his feet.
"I'm totally fine. We need to locate the thief, that's our mission. Not me'' voiced his computer. Both Artemis and Roy shared a look, but ignored what Robin typed. Roy quickly wrapped Robin's arm around his shoulder and the two archers helped him outside.

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The wind outside was blowing strongly, along with the snow that was slowly coming down upon the circus tonight.

Dick slowly walked past the tents and ran his fingers along side the fabric before shoving his hand inside his pockets to keep them warm. His whole team was resting up, giving him the perfect time to escape from them and get some alone time. 
With his head down, snow gently landing upon him, he continued to walk no matter how cold it was or how cold he became, a piece of him wanted to be cold, to be...numb.

He soon same to a box car with a Flying Grayson poster on it. He froze and glanced up at it. He slowly reached out and placed his hand upon it and closed his eyes.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, The Flying Graysons!" shouted Haly in Dick's mind. He then saw his mother's face, her warm smile as she reached over towards him and hugged him, then planting a small kiss upon his forehead, whispering, "My little Robin.''
Dick opened his eyes, tears falling from them and he turned around, pressing his back against the wall and slid down to the ground. He brought his knees up and pulled out a blade from his pocket. He pulled his sleeves up quickly and glanced down at all the past scars he has left upon his body.
"Bruce hasn't even tried to make contact with me, he must not care about me. He is probably happy that I'm gone, he never wanted me in the first place. All I ever was, was a charity case, someone to be pitied. No one cares about me. I'm no one...I'm nothing." thought Dick as he brought his blade down upon his wrist. He pressed down slightly on his already scarred wrist and drew the sliver blade back slowly, then he placed the blade back upon his fresh cut, pressed down again and slid the blade backwards, deepening his cut. He repeated two more times before making a brand new cut right under the first on he just did.

Just then the com in his ear beeped. He sighed and sat down his blade and pressed the com.
"Y-yeah?" his weak voiced cracked.

"Dude, where are you?" questioned his best friend, his boyfriend, Wally.
Dick not trusting his voice right now, plus not really feeling like he could speak, pulled out his cellphone and texted Wally real quick, within two seconds of sending the text, Wally's voice came back through the com in Dick's ear.

D: Confidential mission from Batman, I couldn't tell you. I'm sorry Walls.

"Wow. You know what I'm doing?'' asked Wally and Dick just shook his head 'no' and listened for Wally to continue. "Making a bologna sandwich, kinda like you just did. So, tell me...why are you lying to me? I talked to Tornado, you guys are not on a mission" said Wally then there was a pause before he spoke again, but this time it was a tad harsher, "not an official one anyways.'' said Wally, anger was filled within his words and Dick suddenly felt even more awful.
Dick sighed and leaned his head backwards, closing his eyes tightly before he spoke to Wally.

"A friend...J-Jack Haly'' Dick suddenly said and grabbed his blade and held it in between his fingers, staring down at it, while his fresh cuts continued to bleed down his arm.

"The circus guy? From your old Flying Grayson days?" Wally questioned him.
"Yeah." said Dick and exhaled sharply bringing himself to say more, but not really being comfortable doing so but also just extremely tried and not feeling like texting at the moment. "He's im-implicated in...a-a crime spree. I-I know h-he's clean, but he m-might lose t-the circus."

Wally hearing the last bit spoke up quickly and loudly, for he knew what that place meant to his boyfriend, his best friend.
"Why not bring me along?!?!" shouted Wally over the coms. "I know your back story." said Wally a little quieter now, there was a pause before he spoke again, this time each of his words lace with sorrow.
"I know what that circus means to you. It's where you grew up, it's where you lost your..." said Wally but Dick cut him off angrily.

"I DIDN'T LOSE THEM! I GOT THEM KILLED!" shouted Dick then he sighed.

"Dickie..." began Wally with sadness laced in his voice, he sounded like he wanted to wrap Dick up in his arms and never let him go, and right now Dick wanted nothing more than that but it wasn't an option at the moment, or maybe never again. He was so tried, so hurt and worn out. He's been though enough, he's had enough. Dick was just done.

"I-I left y-you behind...be-because you know m-my backstory. I didn't want m-my best friend...my b-boy friend questioning my objectivity." Dick said and looked back down at his blade then his wrist.

"Dude, that's what I'm here for.'' said Wally over on the coms. Dick inhaled sharply and allow more tears to flow from his blue eyes. He quickly brought the blade down upon his wrist and made a slice very quickly, allowing the dark red blood to flow quickly, he hissed in pain when he did this and went to make another cut upon his sore, bloody wrist.
"Dickie...Dick? Are you okay?" Wally asked. Dick sighed when he realized that Wally must have heard him hiss in pain.

"Uh, y-yeah'' said Dick who then glanced down at his arm.
"Well it doesn't sound like you are. What...oh no Dick. Please don't tell me your-" began Wally but Dick cut him short.

"I gotta t-to go Walls. Bye....I love y-you, love you s-so much I hope you know that.'' Dick said suddenly.

"Dick..." said Wally but before he could say anything more Dick clicked off his com and headed back toward his teammates.
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Later that night the team discovered who was behind the crimes and they went after him. They all were on the topside of the train, beginning their battle against The Parasite.

They weren't doing so well against him, he destroyed Artemis and Roy's bows, then fed off of Conner's powers, increasing himself. M'gann was still weak from when he fed off of her before, her powers were hardly back making her almost useless in the fight. 
When Parasite began to fly into the sky, getting away from them, Robin quickly jumped up, landing upon the stolen tech box but Parasite quickly turned around and waked Robin in the face with his super strength from Superboy.

"Ahh" Robin cried out almost silently but was clearly heard by the team. His eyes rolled into the back of his head as he fell downwards, he then lost consciousness. The team quickly pulled Robin up from the side of the movie train and laid his still form down and glanced up, watching Parasite disappear into the night's sky.

A few minutes later, Dick regained consciousness and he and the team headout to stop Parasite before he put together his plan to create a black hole.
After they found Parasite and fought him, they soon defeated him and Robin shut down his death thingy that was causing black holes.

With Parasite in custity, the circus and Haly saved, everything seemed to be right and okay, aside from what Dick was feeling. He was still down and depressed and had the urge to cut again and the thoughts where still very present within his mind, but he shoved them to the side for the moment, to talk to Jack Haly.

"The show will be going on and I believe that I have you Dangers to be thanking for that'' said Jack Haly.
Dick smiled up at his and shrugged his shoulders and Haly chuckled and smiled down at Dick.

"I guess you guys will be leaving now, so thank you'' said Haly and held his hand out to Dick, who took it and shook it. Dick nodded his head 'yes' to Jack, it was time for them all to leave. For Dick to leave this place, the place he once call home once again. He looked up at Haly and remembered how much he loved that smile the old man wore, Jack Haly was a very kind man and it was going to be hard to be leaving him behind once more.

"Well, Dick. I'll miss you'' said Haly and Dick's eyes widen and he took a small step backwards.
"I-it's Dan, Dan Danger'' said Dick suddenly but stopped protesting to how he truly was when Haly gently placed his hand upon his shoulder.

"Son, you've grown. But somethings never change. Like the sight of a Grayson on the trapeze, can't fake that, can't hide it.'' Haly said and Dick smiled sadly up at him and then rushed into his arms. Jack Haly wrapped his arms tightly around Dick, as he buried his face into the old ringmaster's chest. His shoulders began to shake slightly as he slowly began to cry. Jack hushed him as he held onto Dick.

"Mi-a fost dor de tine. Am pierdut fiind aici atât de mult! Totul este atât de diferit acum, pur și simplu îmi doresc ca ei erau încă aici, că tot ce am putut fi încă o familie aici la circ." (I have missed you. I have missed being here so much! Everything is so different now, I just wish they were still here, that we could all still be a family here at the circus.) Dick quickly spoke in Romanian to Haly and he patted Dick's back and pulled away from him.

"Știu fiu. Dar, este totul în regulă Dick. Asta este ceea ce contează aici, nu ceea ce sa întâmplat în trecut, dar acum și aici." (I know son. But, it is all okay Dick. That is what matters here, not what happened in the past, but the here and now.) said Haly and smiled down at Dick before ruffing up his ebony hair.

"So Dick, what do you say, do an old ringmaster one last favor?" asked Haly and Dick quickly nodded his head and smiled up at the older gentleman.

Haly now dressed in his outfit stepped out into the center stage and address the crowd before him.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, the farewell performance of The Daring Dangers!" shouted Haly as the crowd cheered and clapped their hands. The spot light then landed upon Dick who waved happily at the crowd then glanced down at Haly, who nodded his head and smiled up at him. Dick smiled grew as he then jumped off the platform, doing a triple flip in the air, soaring high above the ground, above everything taking his mind off of it all for just a moment.
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The show, the night was over, everyone was packed up. Dick sat all alone in the dark tent on the platform and looked down at the ground. 
Flashes of that night played out in his mind. Their faces, the tears and the emptiness he felt.

Dick slowly pushed himself up on his feet and walked towards the edge and started down at the ground, seeing their broken, bloody bodies. The bodies of the people he loved most in the world, his parents.

"Mami...tati" (Mommy...daddy) Dick said as a single tear escaped his blue eyes. "I-I...I'm sorry'' he said and turned around, his back facing the ground. He held his arms out wide and closed his eyes, about to let gravity carry him downwards, just as it did all those nights ago.

When suddenly, a familiar gust of wind was by his side and was yanking him away from the edge. He at first began to hit and kick at the person holding him.
"Shhh...it's alright. I got you! I got you Dickie. It's okay babe, I'm here...I here. Shhhh"
His hits slowed down and became less powerful, now they were slight taps against the speedster's chest he screamed out and hit his hard one more time but he soon gave up and collapsed within his boyfriend's arms and broke down. 

Tears pouring out of his eyes.
Wally held Dick tightly in his arms, not letting up for one second. He cradled Dick's head into his chest and squeezed his eyes shut tightly as his own tears came flowing from his eyes.

"If I was one second off, he would have...I would have lost him'' thought Wally as he buried his face into Dick's neck and gave him a small, gentle kiss there.

"It's okay Dickie, I got you. You're safe babe." said Wally as he listened to Dick's cries pick up along with his whole body shaking widely.
"I love you" whispered Wally as he held onto his boyfriend for dear life.

*Since there are only 2 more episodes on season one, which this book is based off of, so there probably will only be 2 or 3 more chapters. I haven't figured out all the details yet, but I was wondering if i should so s sequel to this book.
What do y'all think??? Yes or no?
And if I do a sequel, I was going to do it completely based off of the five unknown years of Young Justice before season two begins, then possibly make a book 3 based off of season two and then get prepared for season 3, which i am over the moon about!!!

-Also thank to all of the reader of this story, you guys have been amazing!!!