You can imagine my complete confusion when I left my small abode and everyone started bowing to me.

After Auriel and I spoke, it still took me a few days to compose myself enough to venture out. You have to remember, I too was mourning. I didn't know Raguel very well, and that's why I was mourning. My guilt had changed from thinking I had been directly responsible for his death to wracking, crippling guilt that I hadn't given him a chance. I had judged him harshly when I had little reason to (forgetting that he was a prick to me to begin with).

ULCININ!

I nearly found myself for the second time on the floor because I was so startled. Luckily I caught my balance before I ended up face first against the ground. I looked up at Metatron, who was absolutely beaming at me. Or, as well as two eyes can convey smiling ecstatically.

My apologies for scaring you, Metatron continued in a normal volume in my head. I adore that you are here.

I smiled, bemused. "It's good to see you as well, Metatron. How are you...?" I trailed off, not wanting to make Metatron uncomfortable.

Ah. Raguel. Yes. I appreciate your condolences, but I believe out of any of us I took his passing the best. I am loathe to say it, but Raguel had little use for me. Truth be told, I haven't seen him in years.

I frowned, the guilt I felt dissolving immediately. Nope. He had been a prick.

"I'm sorry."

I got the distinct impression Metatron shrugged. As I said, his absence in my life made his death easier for me.

"Oh. Er. Well, if you need anything..."

"Ulcinin!"

I looked past Metatron. Auriel was almost running up to me. He stopped just in front of me. Then, without a word, he drew me into his arms for a tight embrace. Once we uncoupled, he held me at arms length.

"It is so good to see you."

"You as well," I said, embarrassed Auriel was practically gushing over me. "Er, is Mikha'el here?"

Auriel lowered his arms. "No. He wasn't expecting you, so he is tending to other things I will let him know you're here-"

"Before that," I interrupted, gently setting my fingers against his forearm. "Um, I was wondering-why is everyone bowing to me?"

"Ah. That." Auriel wrapped an arm around my shoulders and began to lead me toward the study. "Yes, well, you and I should speak before I alert Mikha'el to your presence."

I let him led me deep into the depth of Metatron, the parts where the silence was nearly impenetrable.

"Auriel," I asked hesitantly once we finally stopped. "What happened that day?"

"After Raguel-well, after he-"

"Died?"

Auriel sighed. "Yes, that. You, erm, you sort of-combusted."

"Combusted?"

"It was similar to what happened when you tapped into your angelic abilities for the first time, but much more powerful. Much more-concentrated."

I raised my eyebrows.

"You managed to send a wave of pure celestial energy but only at the demons and Fallen. The lesser demons were immediately vaporized. The Fallen were badly burned and had to retreat...you don't remember any of what I'm saying, do you?"

I frowned, a bit frustrated. "I do not." I looked off to the side. "I remember Raguel being stabbed, then I know there was some sort of-disturbance." I looked at him, brow wrinkled in confusion. "It wasn't dissimilar from that warning alert we received right before we were attacked. But everyone was knocked down-"

"Not everyone, just Fallen."

That information stirred a deep disquiet in me. "Alright, well, I remember everyone falling to the ground. There was this sound, too, this weird, almost animalistic shriek-"

"That was you."

"Me?"

"Yes. You screamed, and it was the sound of a true angel."

"I'm lost."

"In throes of great emotions-good and bad-we emit a noise on a wavelength that is our true vibration. That is, we make the sounds that is native to angels, and only angels."

"Oh. It sounded-weird. Like a dolphin squawking like a bird, if that makes any sense."

Auriel laughed. "That's actually the most apt description I have ever heard. Yes-it's like a dolphin trying to imitate a dove cooing."

"Oh. It was-disturbing."

Auriel shrugged. "It's what we sound like in deep anguish, or the throes of pleasure as we orgasm."

"Excuse you!" I was mortified and horrified all at once.

"What? Come now, Ulcinin. Don't be a prude."

I still blushed horribly. Auriel waved a dismissive hand.

"I digress. The truly impressive matter of what you did was the sheer length of it. It wasn't contained to just the hallway you were in; it was like a supernova shockwave that went wherever our groups were being attacked. You see, none of the other units had been waylaid by the Fallen; the Fallen, we came to find out, were with Meridian exclusively. However, what they lacked in Fallen they made up for in sheer numbers of demons."

Comprehension was slowly dawning on me. I searched Auriel's face for some truth that was not the conclusion I had arrived at.

"I...saved everyone?"

Auriel grinned and put a hand on my shoulder. "Why else would all of Heaven be bowing to you?"

I stumbled, my back slamming against the shelf. Vision swimming, I slowly sank onto the ground. Auriel squatted before me, hand once again on my shoulder.

"Woah woah woah. Are you alright?"

"Yes," I said, trying to focus my eyes and not pass out. "It's just a lot."

Auriel smiled kindly. "Take a minute, and then I will let Mikha'el know you are here."

I nodded, grateful.

"We have all decided we are going to tweak your academia going forward," Mikha'el told me once he arrived. We were at my usual studying table. "Metatron, declutter."

The books glowed for a moment, rose into the air, and zoomed off to where they belonged.

"Come, Ulcinin; follow me."

Intrigued, I followed Mikha'el out of the library. As we walked he talked, and everyone bowed to us.

"You are very powerful, which we knew-however, your powers have far succeeded what we expected. As such, it is time for you to work on channeling that awesome fount of power.

"Right now we are going to visit Raphael. Your powers of destruction are shown to be more than adequate. We think it would be wise for you to harness your power for healing and mending as well. It should come easily to you, I suspect. In fact, I suspect all things shall come easily to you, my dearest Ulcinin."

"Good morning, Ulcinin," Raphael said, as always serenely. "It is a pleasure to see you out and about."

Raphael was wearing a cloak of black. It confused me for a moment, but I assumed it was a cloak of mourning. I frowned.

"How have you been, Raphael?"

He looked at me curiously. "I have been well, Ulicinin."

I cocked my eyebrow, pointedly looking up and down at his attire.

"Oh. That," he said sadly, pulling at the front of the dark material. "Yes well, I miss my brother."

I stepped forward and put my hand on his shoulder. "I am truly, deeply sorry."

Raphael gave a disconsolate smile. "There are things even I cannot mend. No need for apologies; these things happen. 'Tis the natural order of things."

"So. I'm told you're going to teach me how to heal?"

"Yes," Raphael said, clasping his hands and clearly looking delighted at the subject change. "It's quite simple, really."

I quirked my eyebrow.

"Yes. All you have to do is just focus your energy, feel what needs mending, and then mend it."

I paused. "You do realize that I've never been able to harness my powers on purpose, yes?"

"Oh. Mikha'el did not tell me." His shoulder's slumped. "What have you been doing this entire time?"

I gave a snort and glared off to the side. "Evidently not much."

Raphael smiled. "It is of no matter. I will teach you."

Teaching me proved to be rather difficult.

"You're still thinking like a mortal," Raphael told me. "Release your mortal processes. Embrass your spirituality."

I hadn't the faintest clue how to. He, evidently, didn't know, either.

We prayed. Meditated. Did breathing exercises. Practiced yoga. We transported to a serene part of Heaven to help ease my mind and awaken my inner shakras or some shit. By the time we finally figured it out, both of our nerves were shot. I think if it had gone on much longer he would have killed me, or I him.

"Give me your hands," he snapped at me, holding out his own.

"Fine," I snarked back with a glare, taking them.

"Close your eyes."

"Alright."

I naturally fell into breathing in synch with him. After a moment, I peeked one eye open. His brow was furrowed, the tip of his tongue poking through his lips. I nearly laughed.

"Oh," he then breathed. I slammed my eye back shut.

"Oh?"

"Imagine," he said, "imagine...imagine a glowing ball of blue energy in you, in the center of your chest."

I opened my eyes and asked flatly, "What?"

Raphael opened his eyes and glared at me. "Do as I say!"

"Fine, fine. Don't have to act like a whore who wasn't paid..."

"Concentrate, Ulcinin."

We both closed our eyes again.

"Imagine it glowing in your chest, directly behind your breastbone. Not by your heart, but next to it. Centered in the middle, utterly."

I felt stupid. "Okay. I'm picturing a blue ball."

"Alright," he spoke softly, something I hadn't heard in at least an hour, "imagine it glowing ever so softly, no brighter than a firefly in the dead of night. Soft; warm; inviting."

I relaxed a little, doing what I was told.

"Yes, yes, good. Now, imagine it soft around the edges, fuzzy, like sheeps wool. Also picture it pulsating with power."

I felt something flicker in my chest. Just a moment. I thought I had imagined it, but I could hear the smile in Raphael's words.

"Yes, yes...Now, imagine-but don't lose sight of the ball-imagine how lightening looks. Imagine how it behaves. Imagine this blue ball being made from lightening; snapping, crackling in the middle, like a storm, but contained in this small shepher of opaque material-almost like glass."

I started to feel tingly all over, down my legs, my arms, the arch of my back.

"Yes...now, imagine a bolt of lightning, but, instead of striking a moment and then dissipating, imagine it being static, unmoving. Imagine many electric lightning bolts coming from the orb and traveling throughout your body."

I tensed, and Raphael squeezed my hands. "No no, it would not harm you. If anything it feels good-it feels safe. It gives you power, and life."

I imagined everything he told me, and I could feel this ball of energery within me. Pulsating with my heartbeat. And with every pulse, with every beat, the lightning tendrils shot out, like it's own network of veins running throughout my entire body. It was soothing, warm milk on a restless night. It felt like a warm embrace; it felt like-

"Home," I muttered, and I felt it grow stronger. With every beat it grew stronger and stronger, crescendoing like a wardrum within my body. For a moment I feared it was rupture out of me, but I knew it wouldn't. I imagined myself cradling this ball in my hands, in my chest, and I smiled, feeling tears welling in my eyes. "It feels like home."

"Ulcinin-open your eyes."

I did. I was glowing. It was almost like a flame, but mercurial, surrounding me, flicking off my body. I had never felt anything, experienced anything, like it in my entire life. Yet, it felt right. Normal. I felt complete.

"Ah, yes. There you are. Yes." Raphael smiled at me, touching his hand to my cheek. He looked at me in wonder and amazement. "You're a beautiful thing, aren't you?"

I felt myself blush and my wings twitched. I swallowed. "Now what?"

Raphael removed his hand and smiled at me. "Now, you practice reaching your true soul until it becomes second nature, Ulcinin."

"My true-what?"

Raphael clasped both my hands within his own, and I still found myself looking at him through my veil of shimmering, light blue waves of electricity. "Ulcinin-you are exhibiting your soul purely." A tear streaked down Raphael's cheek. "And it is glorious."