Sidharth slammed his fist on the oak table in front, making the contents atop it rattle. His team flinched at the raw anger in his eyes. 

"Sidharth, please calm down."

"You're asking me that?" Sidharth growled. "How dare that piece of sh*t."

Mehul reached over to him and placed his hand on Sidharth's shoulder. "You didn't push him, we know that."

"I did. He was speaking sh*t about my family. I lost my cool. I pushed him, I'm not apologizing for it." Sidharth said firmly. 

"We're not asking you to do that. I need the details, complete and accurate." Mehul said, trying his best to keep himself and the situation as calm as possible.

Sidharth pinched the bridge of his nose. "He shamed my mother and sisters. I can't repeat his words here, they're disgusting. He crossed way too many lines then, but I let him go with a simple shove in the shoulder because he was wasted. We were both drunk and I was agitated by his words." He said coldly, anger built in his chest, reflecting in his voice.

"Bhai shaant ho ja." Kaushal said calmly.

Sidharth closed his eyes, breathing deeply.

"The media is having a field day. Your social media is full of hate." Nivedita informed him, looking up from her phone. "It seems you might have to apologize to him, Sidharth."

"I'm not wrong."

Nivedita flinched at his cold and quick refusal. "Be the bigger man, Sidharth."

Mehul touched Nivedita's hand and shook his head. "No. Don't."

"But--"

"If he's saying he's not wrong, then it's our job to tell the world that. I'm sorry but I disagree with you and his apology would give the world a very different message. We've tried being the charitable ones before. It hasn't worked in his favor." Mehul said softly.

Sidharth watched his team debate among themselves, his own thoughts drifting in and out of the room. He had had his fair share of controversies in the long run of his career, both minor and major. He got out of some easier than the others, sometimes, he wasn't that lucky. 

He blamed his temper, others blamed the circumstances. 

No one was wrong.

It had all changed, however. Everything was changing, ever since his Naaz had entered his life like a ray of hope. She had made him a better person, both within himself and for the world. He was a good man, from the very start but it was her eyes that really showed him that.

Suddenly, a terrible thought struck him.

***

Shehnaaz pushed the door of their room open and entered holding a mug of coffee. "Bebuuuu.." She chirped, having found her Sidharth pacing the room. "Kya hua, pareshaan lag raha hai?"

Sidharth froze in his tracks and looked back at Shehnaaz. She scrunched her nose slightly, wearing the expression of absolute confusion on her face. When he didn't respond to her question, Shehnaaz's confusion intensified. 

She placed the mug on the low table and walked up to him. "Baat karni hai?"

"Nahi.." Sidharth said coldly, and far too quickly. "Jao yahaan se."

Shehnaaz opened her mouth to say something, but hearing the harshness in his tone, thought it wiser not to speak. She walked towards the bedside table where her phone was plugged in to get charged and took it off the charger. 

Sidharth watched her moving around the room, seemingly unaffected and felt a stabbing, cold sensation claw into his heart but he didn't speak.

Shehnaaz unlocked her phone and opened her twitter. Her twitter notifications were completely full of mentions, but that wasn't a new thing for her. She was a star, people were always looking to get noticed by her. She skimmed through the notifications, passing only a cursory glance at the content itself, but now she knew what had happened. Involuntarily, a sigh escaped her lips.

"Kya kar rahi ho tum?" Sidharth asked, again with the same harshness in his tone. He had guessed exactly what she'd been doing. 

She was not ignoring him, she had just become more intelligent than he cared to give her credit for.

Sidharth wanted to smack his head in a wall for even letting such an unlikely thought enter his mind. As if she ever could. 

Shehnaaz smiled at him, throwing her phone on the bed carelessly. "Bebu.. mein na coffee bana rahi thi Maa aur apne liye. Phir merko na teri yaad aane lagg padi." Shehnaaz confessed. 

Sidharth wanted to smile at her honestly adorable confession, but then he remembered.

Shehnaaz walked up to him. "Tu merse gussa hai bebu?" She asked, wrapping her arms around his neck, looking up at him with her best puppy face. 

Sidharth shook his head. "Chipko mat Shehnaaz." He said coldly, pushing her back.

Shehnaaz's face fell. "Bebu.."

***

This would affect her. Sidharth shuddered at the thought. His Naaz, his beautiful angel would have to bear the brunt of his mistakes and she wouldn't even flinch while doing so. She'd just take it, all of it with a smile. 

For him.

Sidharth blinked. No, he couldn't have that.

Kaushal touched his shoulder, bringing him out of his thoughts. He looked almost startled at the intrusion in his thoughts and Kushal smiled at him kindly.

"You weren't paying attention." He said softly. 

Sidharth looked away embarrassed. "Sorry. What were you saying?"

"I was saying that we'll handle this, tu stress mat le, ghar ja, sleep this thing off. Kal subaah tak hopefully sab kucch normal ho jaayega." Kaushal said calmly.

Sidharth nodded, half drifted in his thoughts, from the corner of his eye, he saw Nivedita shifted uncomfortably in her seat. 

"Nivedita, tum nayi ho.. but you're still a part of my team. If you have an input don't be hesitant to speak out." Sidharth said softly.

Nivedita tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear before speaking quietly. "Sir I still think that it'll be better to apologize. I-- don't want to impose sir."

Kaushal sighed, clearly not in favor of the idea but Sidharth blinked at him. "Explain."

"Sir, Shehnaaz Ma'am ka naam saath uchalta hai jab aapke related koi bhi baat media mein aati hai. Baat jitni barhegi, utna Ma'am affect hongi." Nivedita said softly. 

Sidharth bit his lip, his anxiety returning in a fuller form.

"Shehnaaz jaan le legi hamaari agar Sidharth ko jhukne diya, bina baat ke toh." Mehul exclaimed. 

"Aur jo zillat usse khud dekhni paregi?" Sidharth asked. "Nivedita is right. Mein akela kahaan hota hoon kisi controversy mein. Mere acche mein uska naam koi le na le, mere bure mein uska naam sabko, sabse pehle yaad aata hai."

***

"Bebu, mene kucch kar diya kya?" Shehnaaz asked quietly. "Tu kyon aise kar raha hai?"

"Kucch nahi kar raha hoon mein. Tum jaa rahi ho yahaan se. Abhi, isi waqt!"

Shehnaaz reached for his arm, tugging at his sleeve desperately. "Bebu meri baat sunn. Hum sab kucch handle kar lenge na. Please aise mat kar, merko door mat kar khud se. Please meri jaan. I know tu abhi pareshaan hai--" 

Sidharth jerked her hand away and walked past her towards the walk-in closet. Shehnaaz rushed after him, watching him worriedly.

He pulled out a huge travel bag and kept in on the table in the middle of the room. "Sidharth, kya kar raha hai bebu? Mere kapde Sidharth-- chod woh kapde please."

Shehnaaz was watching him stuff her clothes into the bag helplessly. Every time she tried to get closer to him, he'd push her away. Shehnaaz was slowly getting more and more frantic and tears began to stream down his cheeks. Sidharth glanced at her, and his heart broke quite literally seeing her like that. 

This is all he could ever give to her, pain and suffering.

Shehnaaz wiped her tears and snatched the bag from his grip, anger taking over her form. "Kya samajhta hai tu khud ko? Tere kehne pe chalega sab kucch?"

"Meri life hai, mera ghar, meri family, meri problems. Tum charity karne ki koshish mat karo. Bahot sambhaal chuki ho, ab bas!"

"Ab bas?" Shehnaaz asked incredulously. "Zaroorat khatam?"

Sidharth gulped, seeing her eyes reflect genuine hurt and sorrow. He had promised to change. He had promised, he'd never, ever hurt her and here he was doing the exact opposite. 

It seems, he was capable of that only. He was capable of destroying, lives, relationships, happiness.

"Mera nahi hua hai bas." Shehnaaz said firmly. "Merko ladna hai abhi."

"Shehnaaz I'm seriously--"

"Dont. Don't you f**ing dare! Ek roadbump aaya aur tu mera saaman pack kar raha hai. Tujhe kya lagta hai, I won't fight for you?" Shehnaaz asked. 

"I don't need--"

"I do!" Shehnaaz screamed. "I need to. You're the one person who'd never give up on me. I can't give up on you!"

"Jo bhi reason hai, woh club waala video ya koi nayi kahaani, I don't care. Mein terko chod ke nahi ja rahi hoon. Tu hi bolta hai na ki duniya mein aisi koi problem nahi hai jiska solution nahi ho? Toh mein dhoondti hoon na solution, saath milke dhoondte hai, easy hoga." Shehnaaz said hopefully.

Sidharth stared at her dumbfounded. What even was this woman? How could she just fight on & on so relentlessly.

"You knew she could." Something spoke, deep within him. "That's exactly why you're doing this."

She doesn't have to bear witness to any of this, she's better off without him. Sidharth shook his head.

"I don't need you." Sidharth said coldly. "Just leave me alone. Start listening to other people."

"You are not making any sense right now. I'm not going to listen to bullsh*t." Shehnaaz said fiercely.

Sidharth nodded. "Okay then." 

He grabbed her arm and pulled her along with himself, out of the room, through the hall. Shehnaaz winced in pain, owing to his harsh grip but followed him helplessly, tears spilling out of her eyes.

"Sidharth.. ruk jaa please."

***

"Sidharth, kya ho raha hai yahaan?" Rita Maa asked sternly, freeing Shehnaaz from her son's vice-like grip. 

Sidharth turned to look at her and saw Shehnaaz rubbing her wrist, with an adorable pout on her face. His heart was ready to jump out of his chest. He glanced at her wrist, it had turned red.

"Kyon kheench raha tha usko?" Maa asked, rubbing Shehnaaz's shoulder.  "Chot lag gayi usse dekh."

"I don't want her here!" Sidharth said, coldly. "You know what shehnaaz, any self-respecting woman would have left the place by now. Aakhir kitni be-izzati karwaana chaahti ho apni?"

Shehnaaz glared at him. "Tu paagal ho gaya hai Sidharth."

"Paagal mein nahi hua hoon, tum gale pad rahi ho. Tum bhool gayi ho ki yeh mera ghar hai." Sidharth said. "I'm telling you to leave my house aur tum besharmo ki tarah--"

Shehnaaz's glare softened, her steps faltering.

Why was Sidharth saying such things, such horrible and hurtful things? Why was he so adamant on hurting Shehnaaz like that?

He loved her more than anything in this world and he'd never even his wildest dreams hurt her, so why today? What has changed?

Shehnaaz watched him dumbfounded. "What's wrong with you?" She asked so quietly, Sidharth almost missed her words. 

"They're my family. You-- I can't live without you or Maa, or Didis-- why are you doing this?" Shehnaaz asked. "I'm just trying so hard to understand."

Sidharth's resolve was now faltering, bit by bit. He was slowly getting tired of fighting against every single instinct of his to just wrap her into a tight, big hug and never let her go. 

This is not her fault.

Sidharth breathed in, troubled and shaky.

"Apne ghar se nikaal raha hoon tumhe, kucch toh sharam karo yaar Shehnaaz." Sidharth said, stubborn enough to try one last time. 

Maybe, this time it'll stick. Maybe, she'll leave for good and never return to his cursed life. Maybe, she'll find the happiness that she deserved without all the baggage and all the negativity.

***

The thing is.. I have no idea why I wrote this and what's worse is that I have no idea why I'm posting this today of all things..

I guess I have to speed up on some happy plots, but sadness is a bit more.. natural to me right now, so coming up with those plots is easier.

Hope you like it. I'm slowly getting all your prompts I promise. Just give me time.

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