"Happy one month anniversary babe!"

"Not now Emily."

It's getting easier to be honest. Yes, my stomach still churns at the sight of these two together. But I'm coping. I haven't done anything extreme like stick Emily's face to a dart board or stab her voodoo doll a million times to make myself feel better.

"Second day of December and I'm not feeling the Christmas spirit in the slightest," I mumble to Spencer. She gives me a sad smile and pulls the blanket that's wrapped around our shoulders, tighter.

Our football team, as always, made it to the finals for the playoffs. The pep rally has just ended and we have a few hours until the big game, most players are doing light drills on the field. Some are resting on the bleachers, there isn't a whole lot to do during this in-between time, but coach prefers that we stay at school.

Being the finals, this match is significantly more intense than the rest. The squad and team are buzzing with energy but there's a definite focus that everyone is honing in on.

Unfortunately misery and I have become well acquainted over the last month, we're pals, buds, best friends forever. At this point I don't see the sad emotion evading me anytime soon.

I'm head over heels for an asshole who's currently twiddling his thumbs over his phone screen and ignoring his satanic significant other who's prattling on about their Christmas and New Year's plans.

"Why don't we go and sit somewhere else?" Spencer suggests in a hushed tone.

"Hey bitches," Emily sing songs as she skips towards us. "I've got a few errands to run. Be back in a bit!"

"Thank God," I mumble.

"Coach said we gotta stay, Em." Melissa folds her arms across her chest and gives her a pointed look.

"So?" Emily scoffs with a faux smile on her stupid face. "I'll be back soon. Keep practicing."

She skips away and the team proceeds to roll their eyes at her insolent attitude. Nothing can touch Emily, or so she thinks. Drayton watches her retreat with an unimpressed expression until she's out of sight and then his focus falls on me.

We've spoken occasionally over the last month, brief conversations when absolutely necessary, we were even partnered for an in-class econ project - much to Emily's disgust - but nothing deeper, nothing meaningful, which is what I crave more than anything. And it hurts, I miss what we had. But I'm not going to let it consume me. I haven't sent him a single text or called him and I don't plan to. Because I was fine before he came along and I'll be fine again. The fact that he hurt my heart doesn't need to be obvious.

"Shit," Spencer's voice startles me from the intense stare-off that I'd been locked in on with Dray. I give her my attention and do my best to calm the erratic beating in my heart. "Mom wants me home for dinner."

"That's cool Spence." I smile.

"No, I wanted to keep you company." Her little pout is adorable but even I wouldn't pass up one of her Mom's home-cooked meals. They're to die for.

"Go," I nudge her with my elbow, "bring me some back!"

"Ooh, I will."

She jumps up, shivering as the cold air blasts her when she's no longer protected by the blanket and doesn't waste any time sprinting at full speed towards the car park. The spot where she'd been sitting is vacant for only a moment before a large figure is sitting down in her place.

"Hey." Drayton leans his elbows on his knees and stares directly ahead, waiting for a response. Although, I'm not entirely sure how to respond right at this moment.

"Hey?" I reply with a cautious tone. It feels so wrong for us to be at this level of friendship. My mind can't help but flashback to the motorcycle lessons and the skinny dipping and all of the things that had bought us so close.

"How ar-" he cuts himself off, the corners of his eyes wrinkle with a squint as he thinks of what to ask instead of the blatantly obvious - "what are you doing for the holidays?"

"Uh, Nathan and I usually just hang out for Christmas and New Year's. Sometimes we go to Castle Pines for the countdown but otherwise it's pretty low key," I explain. "How about you?"

"We leave for Mexico on the twentieth. Come back just after New Years." He shrugs with indifference.

"You and Emily?"

"Nope." He turns his head to look at me and not to be dramatic, but I think I die. How he manages to look so stoic but still regard me with affection, is beyond me.

Not to mention it confuses me. He chose the girl that he wanted to be with. So why does he have to look at me that way? Once a playboy, always a playboy I suppose. That's a little bit of an injustice though, he doesn't just look at me with desire, there's so much warmth in his gaze that I barely feel the winter chill anymore.

"She's got plans with her family and my parents don't even want her in the house, let alone coming on vacation with us."

"Fair point," I mumble.

"Hey Cheer pear." Maxon comes jogging towards us and I feel Dray stiffen at the use of my nickname. My reaction is much the same. It doesn't sound right coming from anyone else's mouth. "Coming to the after-party at my place tonight?"

Maxon and I have been paired up for every pep rally intro since Drayton and I stopped speaking and I'm not totally oblivious to the obvious advances he's been trying to make. I'm almost certain that he's sleeping with several other squad members at the moment though.

"Um, I don't know." I raise my shoulders with a tight smile.

"Aw come on" - he grips my hand and pulls me to my feet, the blanket dropping on to the bleacher - "I'll give you a ride myself."

"U-u-um, I'll t-t-think about it-t." My teeth chatter and I wrap my arms around myself. The cold air is welcomed when I've been cheering for a solid hour, but right now I'm ready to get into bed with a hot heatie pack.

"Are you cold?" He pulls me into his chest and circles his large hands over my back. "I got you."

"How about you don't," Drayton bites, now standing beside us, he grips my forearm and pulls me out of the bear hug that, despite being foreign and uncomfortable, was kind of warm.

"Dray, what the fuck man." Maxon spreads his arms wide, but he isn't looking for a fight, his expression is genuinely confused. "You're with Emily now."

"Don't touch her" is all Dray offers as an explanation, standing in between us so that I'm no longer able to see the linebacker.

"Na fuck that, you don't get to cock block the rest of us. Ya pick one bro. The rest are fair game."

I feel my features contort at his foul words. He's talking as if I'm a damn piece of meat and if I wasn't interested before, now I'm just downright disgusted.

Dray must somewhat share my thoughts because he steps forward, gripping Maxon's football jersey between his balled fist. "What the fuck did you just say?"

I step around Dray so that they're both in view and note Maxon's red-with-rage face. He's not cowering but with the size difference, I doubt that he's going to challenge him further. But that doesn't mean that I won't. "Drayton, I don't need the heroics. I'm capable of accepting or declining an invitation without an intervention."

It's as if I'm talking to a brick wall. He ignores me.

"Shit Lahey, you've turned into a little pussy." Maxon shoves Drayton's hands from his jersey but the two continue to stare each other down. Dray's balled fists are clenched tightly at his side, his jaw twitching.

"What the hell is going on?!" Emily comes bounding towards us and I feel like if I channeled all of the negative energy in the air, I'd be able to sucker punch her straight into outer space.

"Ya boy here is acting like Dallas' damn bodyguard," Maxon scoffs.

Emily folds her arms across her chest and raises a brow as she glares at Drayton. The two of them engage in a staredown and it seems as though something unspoken is passing between their menacing glares.

"Do what you want Dallas," Drayton finally grunts through a clenched jaw, exhaling as he begins to walk away without looking back.

"Thanks." I smile with sarcasm. "Your approval is essential when it comes to decisions that I make."

Emily throws me an evil scowl before she flicks her ponytail over her shoulder and trails after him, leaving Maxon and I alone.

"So, wanna come to the party?" He smiles as though he didn't just speak about me in a totally offensive and inappropriate manner.

"Ugh. No."

The temperature is beyond freezing, but that doesn't stop me from deciding to go on a walk. If I have to spend any longer than necessary around all of these egotistical athletes, I'm going hurl.

I snatch my hoodie from the bleachers and throw it over my head as I storm across the field and out of the gate towards the car park. I'm not sure when seeing Drayton won't cause me physical pain anymore. I don't know when or if it'll ever get easier. Perhaps it won't until I don't have to see him every day.

The car park is bustling with families, students and arriving opponents. People chat around their cars while they drink beer and chat animatedly about the game. Billows of cold breath and cigarette smoke cloud the night air and the fluorescent lights above the car park illuminate the scattered occupants. I keep my arms folded around myself while I stare at the ground and contemplate where I went so wrong. At what point did I think it was a good idea to fall for the bad boy?

My thoughts are interrupted when a masculine voice and a strong arm taps my shoulder as I stroll along the footpath. "Excuse me, miss."

I look up into a mature face. A man in his late forties with a smooth well-aged face and a caramel coloured complexion. I hear a hint of a light Spanish accent in his voice.

"Can I help you?" We're in a fairly public area with a lot of witnesses but if Drayton has taught me anything it's that I should keep my wits about me around strangers.

I miss him.

"Yes, actually I'm looking for someone, I was wondering if you might know where I can find her. I was told she might be here."

"Uh possibly?" I shrug. "What's her name?"

"Spencer Laurel."

My eyebrows furrow at the sound of my best friend's name. I'm not sure what he wants or who he is but I'm immediately on high alert. If he thinks I'm about to point him in the right direction, then he's sorely mistaken.

"I might know her," I vaguely confess. "Who's asking?"

He chuckles, slightly shaking his head. "I take it you must be a good friend. I sense that protectiveness in your voice." He tousles his wavy black hair before he adjusts his leather jacket. "I'm her father."

"Her what?" I splutter on the words as they come out of my mouth. Shock must be evident on my face because he raises his brows with a small grin. I can see it, I can totally see it. They even share the same lopsided smile.

"I have an old friend here in town. He told me this where all the young ones would be tonight."

Shock may have been the initial reaction but now I'm starting to get angry. Spencer's absent father who hasn't been in the picture since before she was born, is standing before me, a smug grin on his handsome face. His suave attitude is pushing all the wrong buttons.

"Okay, look here Mr Enrique wannabe" - he recoils with a look of amusement - "you've been gone for how long? And you think it's a good idea to just show up at a football game and announce yourself to her as if you've not been gone for the last almost eighteen years. How about if you want to suddenly walk into her life, you show a little more tact! And not to mention, how about you really think about what you're doing before you come waltzing into her otherwise extremely happy reality. You better be prepared to step the hell up and be around for a fcuking long time or you shouldn't bother at all."

I finish my speech with a hoity hmph and spin on my heel, heading back towards the field. I feel as though I can't escape the drama tonight and the game hasn't even started yet.

Yet another thing that's going to weigh down on my mind, the list is just getting longer and longer. I don't know what I've done to deserve such burdened amounts of stress but I know that it's one hundred percent unfair.

I round the corner to head back on to the field but come to an abrupt stop when I spot Dray in a heated discussion with an older man. It's his father, it has to be. Their builds are similar, not to mention the brooding expression, it's a dead ringer for Drayton's.

I back up, disappearing amongst the bleachers, but stay within earshot. It's wrong to eavesdrop, I'm well aware. But I can't help myself.

"I don't see what the big deal is." Dray shrugs. "It's just a few different options."

"Drayton, we've been talking about Baylor for years. I'm not understanding why you'd even consider accepting a scholarship to any other school."

"As of now, I haven't even been offered any scholarships, so this argument is useless," Drayton all but shouts with frustration.

"There are a ton of college scouts here. Trust me boy, you'll be offered more than one deal."

"Then I don't see why I shouldn't consider accepting something else. Come on, don't be one of those Dads. I don't have to go to the same school that you went too."

"I know that UCLA is a prestigious school, but I'd really rather you chose Baylor son," his dad's tone isn't exactly harsh or cruel, but there's a definite authority and demand. It'd make me cower but Drayton doesn't seem the least bit concerned.

"I'll make my choice, based on the options I'm offered. That's it," Dray bites in rebellion.

He turns around and jogs on to the field. I'm a little disappointed that the only knowledge I have of his parents is disgruntled confrontations. I'd pictured him having a more doting parental figure. But I suppose it provides some explanation for his grouchy, closed off tendencies.

As I wander back to the field I think about the conversation Drayton had just had with his Dad. They'd been arguing about colleges but from what Dray had always told me, he was just as sold on Baylor as his father.

I also mull over the sudden appearance of my best friend's father. I wonder how she's going to react. I wonder if I should tell her that he's in town. I wonder if she'll be excited. Argh there's so much swimming around in my head that I don't know how I'm possibly supposed to cope with a positive attitude for the next few hours.

It would seem that Drayton and I both have burdens to bear. The weight on our shoulders is evident. Especially for me. I can barely keep up with the routine throughout the night, stumbling and missing steps. But Drayton pulls through. He manages to keep the team in the lead and we win the playoffs. Another year that our school takes the trophy.

I wish I could feign more enthusiasm, I wish I could engage in the school spirit and show my support to the team by jumping up and down and screaming about the success. But my mind's in a different place. I know that Spencer is around here and I have to wonder if her father's found her or if she's still totally oblivious to the news that's going to dramatically shake her world.

•

"Hey are we going to Maxon's?" Spencer and Grayson are waiting by my car in the crowded parking lot after I've collected my things from the locker rooms.

"Um." I fiddle with the keys in my hand and watch my best friend, smiling and jostling with excitement while her boyfriend holds her hand tightly.

I can't keep this from her, I can't hide the fact that I know her Dad is looking for her. But the thought of shattering the joy that she's found is too painful to consider.

"Dallas," her expression morphs into concern, "what's wrong?"

"If this is about Dray, he's not going to the party. He's going straight home," Grayson assures me. I want to ask why but I remind myself that Drayton is the least of my concerns right now.

"It's not about Drayton," I mumble and look down at the pavement beneath me. "Spencer we should talk. But in private. I mean Gray can come too. Just not here."

"Okay, what the hell is going on?" Spencer untangles her hand from Grayson and steps forward, gripping my shoulders. "Are you pregnant?!"

"God, Spencer no!" I stare at her with disgust. "No, this isn't about me, this is about you and I-"

"And it's about me."

Mr smooth-talking sperm donor appears beside us with a kind smile. Spencer and Grayson both look at him as though he's got two heads and I personally want to remove the one that he does have, for not listening to me. I told him not to approach her in such a casual setting. Of course if he'd followed her home, that would have been worse.

"Who are you?" Spencer squints at him, slowly dropping her arms to her side as she turns to face him.

"You've grown into a beautiful young woman." He admires her with a kind adoration but she doesn't know who he is and neither does Grayson. Why he'd take Enrique as a threat is beyond me though, this guy is twice our age. "I'm your father Spencer."

"Excuse me." Her face pales, the caramel complexion is gone from her cheeks as she recoils with shock.

"Spence I was going to tell you! He approached me before the game and I didn't have the chance to tell you yet!" I don't want her to think I was hiding anything from her. I want her to know that I'm here for her.

She doesn't look at me, but her hand stretches out and squeezes mine. She isn't upset with me, but she's clearly having a hard time processing this news.

"You're her dad?" Grayson folds his arms across his chest and gives Enrique a disapproving once over. "The motherfucker that pissed off before she was born."

Even though Enrique doesn't seem the least bit offended by the words I can't help but want to lean over and give Gray a high five. He's an absolute gem. I refrain from doing so though. Spencer looks like she's about to go into cardiac arrest so I focus my attention on her and wrap an arm around her shoulder.

"I know it seems a bit of a shock to see me after all of these years but I would love to talk with you. Just a conversation is all I'm asking for."

"What is wrong with you?!" I snap. "I told you not to do this here!"

"I don't want to talk to you," Spencer mumbles with her glance cast down on the ground. "I don't want to see you, I don't wanna know, I don't want anything from you. I've done just fine up until now and the last thing I need is you turning up out of nowhere and attempting to be a father."

There's not a whole lot of confidence or power behind the words but it must do the trick because Enrique adopts a sombre expression and gives a slight nod before he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a card.

"I'll be in town for a while. If you change your mind. Call me. Please Spencer."

I snatch it out of his hand and flash him an unforgiving scowl. At this point it wouldn't matter what he has to say. What could possibly excuse eighteen years of absence? He looks to be well and his attitude suggests that he's rather full of himself. So the assumption has to be made that it just suits him to show up, forget how anyone else feels.

He walks away as I read the business card.

Nicolás Santiago.
Vintage car sales consultant.

The number on the back is a Californian area code but I can't be sure which city.

"Huh, I've been calling him Enrique," I mumble as I slip the card into my pocket.

"What?" Spencer stares at me through red-rimmed eyes, expelling the humour I felt over his ordinary name.

"Oh nothing." I wave her off and she falls into Grayson's embrace, sobbing as he soothes her with comforting words and small circles on her lower back.

If I'm grateful for anything right now, it's that these two have each other. At least I know that when I'm falling apart and can't be the best support that she needs, someone else will be able to take my place. That doesn't make me jealous. It makes me incredibly relieved.

• • •

Double update fam. Read on for 27. I PROMISE y'all are gonna be happy with this next one 😏😏