Yes it's been like a day but I am STILL freaking out about this and I probably won't stop for the rest of my life.

Special thanks to my real-life friend charliehunnamlimhrf for watching the livestream when I thought I wouldn't be able to and telling me that I won. I didn't have wifi and don't have unlimited data, but I watched the fanfiction awards be announced because I was sweating, my heart was pounding, and I could NOT wait.

Literally our reactions:

Promptly followed by more screaming.

(In case you couldn't watch the livestream, they said it was so hard to pick winners that the judges had to say whether or not they would die for each story, so that's how they picked an that means the judges would die for Havoc AKSJCKAKDKSJ)

I HAD TO SIT STILL BECAUSE MY DAD WAS LITERALLY RIGHT THERE, BUT I SUCKED IN A SHARP BREATH SO HARD IT HURT AND DID A LITTLE DANCE IN MY SEAT AND ON THE INSIDE I WAS LIKE

I wasn't allowed to say anything but since the awards are over, I suppose I can now. I was actually contacted by the Wattys account 2 weeks ago to inform me that I was a finalist. I had to fill out a form and stuff, where they asked me what winning a Watty would mean to me, why I wrote the story, etc. I was told to keep it confidential because revealing it could affect the results, and believe me, it was the HARDEST thing I've ever done. I usually scream to you guys about everything, so when I got the PM and promptly burst into tears, it physically pained me not to go online and go "ASLDKDKAKAKKFFJWJAJ!!!!!!!"

Here is the livestream for anyone who wants to watch! You can see what I said for why I chose to write the story.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

Also, when I was asked what winning a Watty would mean to me, I basically ranted about you guys, how you're my family, how grateful I am to have such a wonderful support system, and how Wattpad is like a home away from home. I just love y'all so much🥺🥺🥺

Me @ you guys:

💗💓💛💕💙💜💞❣️🧡💘💚🤍💝

I know I already ranted on my message board, but I am seriously SO thankful for this. I'm extremely proud of Havoc and I'm so honored that it was recognized by Wattpad. I've been entering in the Wattys for years and winning feels like a full-on fever dream. It's a great plot twist in this crappy year and hopefully it'll motivate me to do well on my final exams next week (oof). Side note: I am failing chemistry, so wish me luck on that pls. Imma need it.

My therapist knows about my Wattpad so I'm gonna log into our online appointment next week and be like "GUESS WHATTTTT??? NO I DID NOT HAVE ANOTHER BREAKDOWN, THIS IS GOOD NEWS I PROMISE"

If any of you entered, I want to extend my congratulations as well. Meeting the requirements this year was SO difficult. Having a completed story that's at least 50k words is a tough thing to do, and if you were able to enter, that's an amazing feat in and of itself. I am so proud of you— you did amazing!! And to those who perhaps didn't qualify but are hoping to enter in the future, I'm wishing you the BEST of luck. I honestly don't think I'll be entering again so I can give other people a chance to win.

Also, since I've been gone for a week, I have a LOT of rants to post, so sorry about that. This won't be the last you'll hear from me today!