24 | you have gone far
Music in media: New Light by Nive
Truly, we have come a long way, to have survived two months of chaos. But of course, in the month of December, there's just one holiday we can never escape. Just one more special episode, my mother promised yesterday as she booked movie tickets for two. Otousan begrudgingly leaves home with her, communicating through his eyes a plea unlike any other. You see, my father hates going to the movies, but my mother loves the cinema. As if it couldn't get more problematic, he has to watch two and a half hours worth of yaoi, unable to flee to the toilet because "you'll block the screens, and it's disrespectful to the actors who didn't go the toilet while filming the movie", as affirmed by a confidently incorrect Okaasan. Oh, don't forget the post-credits.
My heart is with my father this Christmas. I will forever remember his sacrifice and learn to treat him better in future. On the other hand, the boys have arrived at the Aomine minka to celebrate the joyous occasion. Just yesterday, Christmas Eve, the last episode of Show Me Your Smile was aired, aptly for the most romantic day of the year where couples gather in public and single people and Pokémon hug each other to sleep, or hibernate.
Christmas in Johto isn't celebrated the same way as in Unova and Galar. Christmas, for us, is another reason to spend time with friends and family. Christmas isn't a religious time, but a day to spread happiness.
Meta swipes at my phone where the Christmas menu is displayed, paralysed by the culture shock. We hereby express our deepest gratitude to the Ivory Tower and their High Horsepower without the power, their Westernised education and lifestyle injected into our beloved Ditto, and we will now commence the erasure of their influence.
"We're really not eating stuffed Pidgeot for Christmas?" Meta drools over my phone and I snatch it away before things get worse.
Wiping my phone with a handkerchief, I roll my eyes. "We had to place orders six weeks in advance. We can't just call in for a delivery today because by then Christmas will be over. That's how good it is."
Rae supports my statement with a vehement nod. "Sofu's Fried Combusken is our tradition!"
"Yeah." Kaspar flicks Meta's forehead. "I still can't get over the shock that you don't know SFC."
Meta frowns. "Why Combusken? Why does the menu only have Combusken? This is utter discrimination!"
"You don't understand," Hayato says, planting a palm on his hair. "Combusken is the middle ground between mild and blazing hot. It's got the best of both worlds in terms of flavour and really juicy meat."
Meta jabs an accusatory finger at him. "Hold up! You should be defending your fellow bird Pokémon! Just because Combusken isn't a Flying-type doesn't make it any less an avian!"
Matsuba holds Hayato back before the latter could fly into a rage. "Hey now, it's Christmas! Can't we all chill a little?"
Seven knocks on the door eject us from the sphere of discord. Thank you so much for the save, but please, do not be a horde of Gastly again.
Can Gastly knock? Does it even have hands? Wait a minute, it does learn some punching moves. But it couldn't have been a Gastly, could it?
"Anyone home?" Three hard knocks succeed the question.
We exchange looks. According to the message on the delivery app, the food will take ten minutes more to arrive. So who is this? Santa doesn't knock doors, but yeet his sorry ass down and up chimneys, so it can't have been Santa.
"A serial killer?" Kaspar suggests. "This is common in thrillers."
"It's always the policemen for you," Meta says, eyes now locked on the thumping door. "Come now, don't glare. It's a Unovan thing!"
"I'll check what's up," Matsuba utters as he rises and walks to the door. We trail his feet with our gazes and hold our breaths.
The door opens.
A lanky figure waves at us from the doorway, hands Matsuba a package wrapped with a thin rope, fanboys about us for a few seconds and dashes off. Great. One more mystery to unwrap.
Zoom in on the package to the floor, cameraman. I'm sure you're proficient enough to know suspense cues.
"Doesn't look like your typical Christmas gift," Hayato observes.
I tap the box. It doesn't budge or make a sound, so what's inside is either an item or a dead Pokémon or a cut human. There was once when the police received their loved ones' entrails as Christmas gifts when hunting down a sinister serial killer. A more relevant tale revolves around extravagant death threats mailed to celebrities' houses, sometimes personally delivered by their favourite stalkers.
"You're all overthinking." Rae inserts herself into the conversation, goes closer to the package and pulls the rope. "If this is what adults are, I don't want to grow up."
"Pathetic," Meta snickers behind our back as the gift unravels.
"That includes you," Rae steels her voice. The last of the box gives way to loosening tension.
A stack of leather tomes address us with bombastic titles and minimalistic designs. A closer look garners a new perspective, eliciting a new response from us. Rae, ever the courageous one, opens the tome at the top of the stack and squeals, her cheeks flushed, her eyes seeking bleach. I volunteer as tribute and flip the cover.
In full colour, an obscene yaoi sears itself into my mind. Let's not go into descriptive territory. Remember when people used to parrot "show, don't tell" be it whether they actually mean they say or say what they mean, merely repeating this phrase because it's a reminder to amateurs about their tendency to dive back into telling rather than showing? This is one of the times showing shouldn't be agreed upon, unless you work in the Ivory Tower, which is a different story altogether. Why do I say that? In the next moment, I receive a text from Okaasan saying that she won't mistreat us and will give us sponsored entertainment.
So much for entertainment.
"What should we do with them?" Kaspar scratches his head with both hands. "This is next level Granbullshit!"
Matsuba steals a glance at his phone. "A steamy special episode that celebrates the best of harems through a festive reenactment of fan favourite sex scenes... Fuck no!"
Another ding sets out to kill us and Hayato checks his inbox. "I know you blocked my number, but bet you didn't expect this, Kōsuke Hayato? Now, be a good boy and make sure you read these manga. All these are made with love by your fans!"
Then, it's Kaspar's turn. "Did you think I wouldn't be able to reach you? We at the Ivory Tower pride ourselves in our erudite business, and we will do whatever it takes to get what we want."
He groans and throws his phone across the room. Rae goes over to coax him as we give him doubtful looks. Turns out someone hacked into his social media account and shared images and videos of him crying after Mellow's wedding. If Kaspar doesn't read the manga, then they will release a special video of him crossdressing and dancing to the latest Toktik trends.
"I deleted those trashy vids, damnit!" Kaspar cried and placed his head on Rae's shoulder. In any other situation I would've tossed him out of the house.
Six knocks on the door push us further to the edge, with the addition of a singsong "SFC Delivery!" wafting through the keyhole.
"Hayato, you're the nearest to the package, go put it in my room!" I point to my room and scramble for the door as he picks up the stack and makes a mad dash for my room.
The deliveryman cocks his head sideways when I open the door and he freezes when our hands meet so I can take the food from him.
"Are you alright?" I wave my free hand across his face.
He blinks and falls backwards, almost tripping over but managing to regain his balance at the last second. "S-Sorry... This is the Aomine household, right?"
"Yes?" I raise my brow. "You got it right."
"Ummm... Cool, I didn't think I would really meet you in person! I love your drama series! You're really great actors!" He drones on and I pass the food to Rae, my eyes locked on him. "You are so stunning! I would love to see more of you on TV! Can you sign on my cap?" I do just that. "Sweet! Thanks! I'll get going!" He turns on his heel then spins back to add, "Right, I hope you'll like my fanfic. It's called Desire Is An Ocean!"
He goes off screaming and shouting at the nightlights, the festive decorations blinding the city, a couple in passing and a kennel before vanishing from sight.
I shut the door, my heart easing into a rhythmic thump. Food would really help right now. And for the record, sorry, but I don't want to know how you'll be portraying any of us.
Everyone's seated at the table, unpacking the delicious dinner. The Christmas menu offers a large bucket of cornflake-crusted fried Combusken with a special dipping sauce containing crushed candy cane and mixed Berries, six tubs of coleslaw, six cups of a minty chocolate drink and a tiramisu log cake to share. Just the sight of it is mouth-watering, and the temptation to lick my fingers boils inside me even before I take my first bite.
"Itadakimasu!" We cheer and grab a piece of fried Combusken each. I hold a drumstick in my hand, the rough and dry cornflakes greasing my fingers, the scent of breakfast coiling round my being, as if this dinner will be the start of a new dawn. The crunch against my teeth sends Combusken oil leaking onto my tongue, the firm meat full of spice and everything nice. Next, I dip my drumstick into the novelty of a sauce. I feel as though I'm instantly teleported to the peak of Mt. Silver where Stantler gallop in circles round a large candy cane from which Rawst, Razz, Belue and Mago Berries hang, swinging like a merry-go-round on steroids. The cold doesn't bother me anyway.
I proceed to hug myself when a blizzard strikes me. No, it's not a blizzard. It's a snow white, tender Combusken meat storm. What an assault! So strong! My nerves are tingling and I'm getting my daily dose of dopamine. Oh no, don't sweep my away from Mt. Silver, I still need-
Milky brown washes over my frame. The Combusken are kicking and blazing around me, but my surroundings seem like a blender. Am I going to be pulverised into a protein shake? Is this the sorry fate of a harem protag?
I refuse to admit it!
I inhale and consume the whole of the liquid, the rush of spicy coolness coursing through my veins. The blender is emptied. I am free at last. I am back at the table.
I blink and sink into SFC Fantasyland once more, rinse and repeat. How can food be so addictive? Correction, how can any food besides the ones I make be so addictive?
I refuse to admit it!
Yet here it is, the limited edition SFC Christmas menu, giving me all the joys I need. Who cares about the decorations outside? Who cares about shopping? Who cares about kissing under the mistletoe? Who cares about the single life? All I want from Christmas is you, SFC. I don't need anything else anymore.
I can rest in peace.
Good night, everyone. Good night, world. This is my last dinner and I'm so glad to have been alive up till now. I must—
"Kyo!" Someone shakes my body and I spit out the last of my fried Combusken. Oh, that's just the bone.
Orienting to my surroundings again, I slowly piece together the likeness of a home and what seem to be humans and a pink blob of squishy substance spilled onto the floor. Someone must have spilled their drink and was too ashamed to clean up. No, it's just Meta the Ditto. I'm home. I'm really home.
Hold on, did I just go all-out Shokugeki no Souma over some fried food? I don't feel so good.
"We're cutting the tiramisu log cake," Matsuba says. We wrap our hands round the knife and give it a push. Yeah, it's something we do every year because the power of friendship will bless the cake with pleasant flavours. Honestly, though, isn't "friendship is magic" a better catchphrase than "Pokémon power"? Looking at you, Ash Ketchum and your Zeraora kitty.
The chocolate is rich enough, the perfect blend of sweetness and bitterness, and the cream is milky and buttery without overpowering the fluffiness of the cake.
We finish up in a few minutes and clean the table before returning to the Donphan in the room.
"So... what do we do with the manga?" Hayato asks.
Knocks on the window send us into a frenzy. It's Sky, from Mellow and Medicham's wedding. Having calmed down, I unlock the window.
"Hey," I say and rub my hands behind my back. "You're in Johto."
"Yeah," he says, running his fingers through his vermilion hair. "I'm here to celebrate the end of your drama."
"You should've told us," Meta cries. "Do you like Johto? It took me a while to like Johto."
Sky nods. "I've been retracing your steps. Just yesterday, I've gone to all sorts of place and ended off at Celebi's shrine. And you won't believe it, but I met Celebi!"
"Is Celebi so free nowadays?" Kaspar rolls his eyes. "Wait a minute... Does that mean you were here since last week?"
Right, because last week, we wrapped up the final episode in Bellchime Trail.
The boy nods. "Anyway, merry Chrimas!"
"Christmas," Meta corrects him.
"That's what I said," he retorts with a smile. "Ah, the maid café's crowded today so I'll be going there tomorrow. By the way, Meta, are you happy now?"
His question catches the all of us off guard. Well, we did promise to make Meta smile and now would be a good time as any to know the results since the drama will come to a definitive end by midnight.
The Ditto laughs. "Why won't I be? But I think I can be happier. I still feel like something's missing."
"I think you'll find that something soon," Sky says and directs his gaze at us. Yeah, if anything, we can always do more to fill Meta's void. "What about you, Kyo? Can you say you're happy?"
I touch the window pane.
Well, you have gone far, haven't you? But is this smile of yours genuine or something else entirely?
A thread of suspicions kisses my mind. I exhale and look at Sky.
"Somewhat."
Rae comes to my side and squeezed my hand. She takes in the boy before us, then points to his pants. He glances downwards and turns away, zipping up his pants to conceal his white underwear.
"I... I'll get going."
"Merry Christmas, Sky," we shout and he hands us a nonchalant wave.
"That's a great distraction," Hayato mumbles and slides his back down a wall. "So... the yaoi collection."
"I'll just put them on my bookshelf and act like a scholar," I say at last. "As long as no one questions the books, I'll be fine."
"What you said will be aired, Kyo," Meta reminds me.
"Does it matter? It's the last of Show Me Your Smile." I cross my arms and look at an imaginary camera. "We can finally live our lives in peace."
We cheers to just that.
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