The day Akshara left Udaipur, she had been numb. With a picture of her and Samarthya in her hands, her family's betrayal in mind and painful feelings regarding Abhimanyu in her heart- she had left in the bus, sitting lost for a long time. She had closed her eyes when the light was dying in the sky and opened them again when there was light outside. Yet, her mind seemed tired, far from rested.

'Madam ji ye last stop hai!'

She heard the conductor say and nodded. She got up and collected her belongings. She could hear the ladies whisper, some wondering what was wrong with her, some pitying her.

'Sadme me lagti hai bechari!'

'Kya pta! Ghar se bhaagi hui bhi ho skti hai!'

'Lagta nahi! shyd iske parivar me kuch hua ho...'

Parivar? Akshara's conscious laughed. If only they knew she had no parivar! Her home died with her father and now it was just a house. A house where she suffered, hoping for love for years. Now, that hope was dead and so was her namesake family for her. The only people she held anything in her heart for were her brothers. She knew she'd contact them one day. But first, she needed time to heal.

She sighed and put Samarthya's wallet in her sling bag. Putting that bag across her body, her guitar bag on one shoulder and dragging the other bag, she headed out of the bus station. Her eyes fell on the board of the city.

PUNE!

Life is strange. It does move in circles! Akshara thought as she realised she was in a familiar city. This very city had been her escape many years ago when she had to leave her childhood home on Arohi's whim. Now, she was back in the same city.

Akshara: Ek tarah se accha bhi hai. Poori tarah se anjaan sheher bhi nahi hai....

Akshara hailed a cab and instructed the driver to take her to an address she knew by heart.

................

The cab stopped in front of a cozy cafe. Akshara stepped down and paid the driver off. She took her belongings and opened the cafe's door. For the first time in a long time, Akshara smiled as the smell of coffee invaded her nose. An old lady was behind the counter and stood up hearing the sound of someone coming in.

Old Lady: Abhi open nahi hai...itni subah subah kon- Akshu!....Aye Robert!! Dekho kon aya hai...

The old lady ran towards as fast as her tired limbs would take her and hugged her tightly. Akshara closed her eyes as relief set in her body. It was just as warm as she remembered.

Akshara: Meera Aunty...

Meera: Akshu?! ( cups her face) kaisi hai baccha!? Udaipur jaakr toh bhool gayi na aunty ko. Bohot miss kiya tujhe humne.

Her husband came hurrying and greeted Akshara. Meera and Robert were somewhere around her grandparent's age. Their families had disowned them when they married for love and they never had children. Now, they had retired from their jobs and owned a cute cafe in Pune. Akshara often visited this place for its dreamy cupcakes and excellent coffee over the three years she stayed at Pune. Eventually, she became close to the owners as she'd volunteer to help whenever required.

Meera: Accha idhr aa, baith. Mai abhi teri favourite coffee or cupcake laati hoon.... itni subah aayi hai, pakka raat ko nikli hogi...bhookh bhi lagi hogi na...

Akshara sat thinking how two absolute strangers gave her so much warmth when her own family was cold towards her. Shaking her head, she resolved to move forward without thinking about the people who never thought about her. When Meera came with the things and fed her with love, Akshara broke down in her arms. Her pain that was held inside her, leaped out the moment it felt a gentle hand on her head.

Akshara did not tell her the extend of what happened and Meera already suspected that Akshara's family wasn't very nice to her but knowing they did something that made her abandon them completely touched Meera. She told Akshara that she can stay with her for as long as wanted. Akshara denied but Meera & Robert forced her to agree.

Immediately after that, Akshara arranged for a new cell phone and made copies of her documents. She used all the money she had to rent a one bedroom flat for herself. She mailed her resume to various hospital and schools hoping for a job as a music therapist or a music teacher- anything! She needed a stable income.

..........

A few days after settling in Pune, Akshara was still busy making her new 'home' live-able and hunting for a new job. Meanwhile, she'd help Meera and Robert with their cafe.

Presently, Late night- at the Cafe

Akshara was closing the main door while the couple arranged things for tomorrow. She'd head out through the back door. Robert was also watching the news.

'Abhi abhi mile sutro se pata chala hai ki aaj ki baithak me swasthya aur parivar kalyan Mantri, Dr. Manoj Gupta shamil nahi they. Kaha jaa raha hai mantri ji pichle kuch dino se beemari ke chalte baithakon ka hissa nahi rahe hai. Khabar to ye bhi hai ki...'

Akshara zoned out after that. Manoj uncle was sick! The first person she thought of at that moment was Samarthya. Like her, he'd lost his parents too. He was very close to his grandparents. Her heart went out to him. He must be suffering so much!

Meera: Akshu? Beta kya hua?

Meera touched Akshara's face causing her to snap back into reality. She gulped and without thinking anything, she ran. She had her sling bag with her and without caring to even head back to the house, she left straight for Udaipur.

...........

When Akshara reached Udaipur in the early hours next day, she headed straight for Samarthya's house but found it locked. She rubbed her head in worry and pondered over calling Samarthya but her stupid self had changed her cell without noting numbers.

Akshara: Wait! I have his wallet! Kissi ID pr number toh hoga...

She was about to fish out his wallet when she heard someone.

'kon hai wahan!!!'

A man came forward with an angry expression. He was agitated that someone broke his sleep so early.

Akshara: Kaka....vo...sorry..mai-

Caretaker: Arey aap? Aapko dekha hai maine yahan...pr iss time yahan kaise?

Akshara: vo Manoj uncle ki tabyt ka suna...

Caretaker: Haan...sir ko achanak hospital lejana pada tha....sb bohot ghabra gaye they...khaskar chote sir. Kissi ko dikhate nahi they lekin maine dekha hai unhe garden me akele...

Akshara felt bad for the pain her friend must be going through. She hated herself for not being there was someone who gave her unconditional support that no one else did- not even her brothers.

Akshara: Ab kahan hai?

Caretaker: Vo to Dehradun gaye...

Akshara: Kya?! Pr unhe travel mana hai na...news me to bol rahe they...

Caretaker: Shyd haan kr diya hoga...kl hi sb wapis Dehradun ke liye nikal gaye...

Akshara: Oh...

Akshara felt slightly relived to know that Manoj's health must be better now. She started to leave.

Caretaker: Tum kahan jaa rahi ho?

Akshara: vo...vo....

Caretaker: Abhi itni subah kuch khula bhi nahi hoga...thodi der aram kr lo...mai chabi deta hoon...

Akshara: Nahi kaka, koi zarurat nahi hai...

Caretaker: arey kaise nahi hai!? aram kro beta. Tumhe dekhr lgta hai raat bhar soi bhi nahi ho...

Akshara nodded weakly as he gave her the keys. She felt weird to step inside Samarthya's house without seeking his permission- not that he'd mind.

Caretaker: Kuch chahiye ho toh bata dena...mera quarter main gate ke pass hi hai...

Akshara nodded and locked after he left. Settling on the couch, her eyes fell on the picture on the table. Manoj and Neelam were smiling at the camera while Samarthya was sitting in the middle. She took out the picture from his wallet and smiled at it. Her fingers traced his then chubby cheeks and she sent a silent prayer for him. She had spent the entire night worried for him but now fatigue took over and sleep claimed her.

.............

Akshara woke up yawning and smelled her favourite aloo paranthas. Naina aunty was making them.

Neelam: Uth gayi Akshu?

Akshara looked and realized she had slept at her neighbours' house.

Akshara: sowry-

Neelam: arey koi baat nahi beta....thak gayi isliye neend aa gayi...

Naina: galti un ladko ki hai...khud itne bade hai, iss bacchi ko pehle to le aate hai apne saath aur phir bhagate rehte hai. Ab unke aage toh isse jldi thakna hi hai na...

Akshara: bhai?

Neelam: Vo toh chale gaye beta...Kairav ki drawing class hoti hai aur Vansh bhi sath chala gaya...

Akshara: Sammy?

Naina: Vo homework kr raha hai..

Neelam: Kya baat hai!?

Naina: maine kaha tha Akshu ke uthne se pehle poora kr lega toh mai usse baad me Akshu ke saath khelne dungi..

Neelam: (laughs) ye ladka bhi na...

Akshara smiled, not fully listening because now Naina had placed a hot parantha in front of her. She had made it less spicy for Akshara who was still very small and Neelam fed her small portions after cooling it down.

Samarthya: Ho gaya homework! Mumma! Akshu uthi??

Akshara heard someone run downstairs and stop.

Samarthya: shorty?

.............

Akshara woke up as sunrays fell straight to her face. She got up rubbing her face and looked around. The house was similar to the one in her dreams. Yes, a lot had changed but the basic layout of things felt the same. Despite not remembering much about Samarthya, she suddenly felt different. He was her childhood friend! Her true friend.

He had come back in her life and kept his friendship. Yes, he also had feelings for her but now that Akshara thought about it- he never made her uncomfortable. He never pushed his feelings. He let her cry over another person without trying to shoot his shot at her.

Her heart filled with appreciation but can she ever return his feelings? She did not know what to think. She went to the washroom and freshened up. She heard a knock at the door and opened the door. The caretaker had bought her some water and food. She thanked him wholeheartedly and tried to pay but he did not accept. Akshara thanked him again and ate the food.

As she took the first bite, she realized how hungry she had been. She cleared after herself and booked a cab online.

Akshara: ab mai chalti hoon Kaka. Apne jo bhi kiya, uske liye thank you...

Kaka: Khush raho beti...aur aate rehna...

Akshara nodded and left when the cab arrived. She looked out of the window. It had been only a few days since she left this town but it felt different now. Her eyes fell on her childhood home as the car drove past it. She saw her family members in the front yard, sipping tea. She had never been a part of them.

Then, there were her feelings for the star doctor of Udaipur. Such feelings don't automatically disappear! She recalled his face and her heart started to ache for him.

Akshara: just my luck!

She whispered when she realized that the driver was taking a route that would have Birla hospital on its way.

'Abhimanyu Birla!'

Her heart whispered that name. She loved him. She had taken her time to realise it but she loved him to bits. There was no doubt that he loved her too. If only they had met at a different time, they'd probably been together. But he loved her too fast. He realised his feelings and moved before she had realised hers. Her sister got into the mix with her own selfish motives and twisted everything for them.

She recalled the passion in his eyes. He was a fierce lover, no doubt! But he hurt her. He did not give her anytime! He chose to move on with her sister and then again reached out for her when he realized how mean her sister was.

Quite frankly, Akshara always knew her sister's nature wasn't meant for everyone. Arohi's nature was meant to be in a nuclear family, preferably with a career oriented, practical husband. Her selfish nature could never adjust in a joint family or with a husband who thought with his heart.

Abhimanyu did that. He thought with his heart first, sometimes with mind but never both. His ego got in the way when she rejected him and she did not know why he chose to move on with her sister! Who does that? If they want to move on from you, why would they pick up your close relative? Knowing that it will make them face you for the rest of their lives?!

Akshara still wanted to fight for him after everything. Wanted him to fight for her!? But he simply gave her up for Samarthya! Did he ask her? No! Did her feelings not count? Was she a trophy that he simply passed to the next deserving person?

She did not hate Abhimanyu. Her heart would never allow her! But she was hurt and disappointed. To add to this were now Samarthya's feelings. He never voiced them but now her mind kept thinking about them. She was torn and felt lost.

Akshara: (in mind) mai kya karu mumma?! Thak gayi hoon mai! Sbse!

The driver called her out of her thoughts when they reached the station She paid him and headed towards the ticket counter. The person behind the desk asked her for the destination.

Akshara: Pune....

Person: Details!

Akshara: One second.

She put her hand in the bag to bring out her ID when something fell down. She bent and picked up the wallet that was open.

Akshara: Picture! Picture kahan gayi!!!

Person: Ma'am?

Akshara: sorry...

Her eyes darted around till they fell on a white square paper on the floor. She ran out of the line. It blew out of her reach but she finally caught it. She picked it up and cleaned the dust away from it.

Akshara: Thank God!!!

She got back in line and reached the counter.

Person: Arey aap? Haan toh Pune, haina?

Akshara: Dehradun...

She said quietly but with surety

................

This chapter is all about Akshara's inner conflicts. I don't think she can be with Samarthya without an honest confrontation with her feelings.

Upnext: Akshara goes to meet Samarthya

xoxo