I've been talked bad about before. I always got sad after, always had doubts that my other, way more real friends actually liked me. I got mean, and I got sad. I shelled up.

It had been a while before today, when I found out it had happened again. This time, it was an online friend. We were once close, and then we weren't. He said I was overdramatic, and that nobody really liked me.

Instead of immediately thinking that was true and crying, I.. didn't. I didn't cry, I hardly cared. People checked on me all day, but I told them I was fine and I knew it was true.

We talked about it later. They were still concerned about me. It did sting a little bit, to be told nobody liked me. But.. I can't even explain it, but my reaction felt like healing. Because I knew that the things he was saying about me were false. People did like me. A lot of people did. And I am overdramatic—but I'm also a kid, and he was overdramatic too.

I won a competition because people liked me. People can hardly wait for the moment I get into the town my theatre camp is in because they want to see me and they actually care about me.

I know he is less than a year younger than me, but all I could think when my friends had immediately ran to tell me that he was talking shit about me, all I could think was.. "That's childish. That's unnecessary. He had done all of this over a groupchat and possibly ruined one of the realest friendships he could've had."

Because I did not lie to him. Not once, not twice, not three times. Never. Except for today, when he asked me to add him in a groupchat. I'd lied and said it was full. But here is the goddamn honest truth, spoken straight from Emi's mouth:

It wasn't full. I just couldn't imagine myself wanting him there.

By not caring, I realize, that I have given myself power over him. The ironic thing is that Power was his name. His online name, I suppose, sort of like Emi. Or Seven, as he knew me.

And my friend, who had also been crapped on by him and had been dealing with his issues, he replied to my message and said, "He doesn't deserve us."

And I replied, "No, no he does not."

That is the moment I realized I was going to be okay. I'd survive the rest of high school. Probably get a great job in art, or music, or writing, or something I love. Bad things will continue to happen to me, but I have the strength and the willpower to overcome them.

Even though I'm diagnosed with a whole bunch of things and have to go to a psychologist to see if there's any more diagnosis we have to make for me; I don't think anything is wrong with me. It's more that people are wrong for me.

And realizing that my old friend was a bad person anyway (he actually was, that's not just the bitter part of me).. that's power.