October 4th 1914 

Dear siblings,

I miss you all so dearly. I miss spending time with you all. When I was with you, it wasn't so boring like where I am. We have to wait for our enemies to attack, which most of the time takes hours. I always clean my weapon, but after that there isn't much to do. Most of the time when I have nothing to do, I think of the memories of us having fun. Like, when we were younger and used to catch bugs in a jar. But, other times I have thoughts about whether I will live or not. I would like to say that I welcome death, but I would be lying to myself. I'm afraid to die and leave you all behind.   

Besides boredom, the trenches are in horrible condition. It is very muddy and in some areas there is water. The water is very cold and gives us frostbite if we stand in it for too long. We were told to change our socks regularly, wear waterproof footwear, gumboots, and cover our feet with whale oil. I don't have any waterproof footwear, gumboots, or whale oil. I can't feel my feet anymore. Once people can feel the pain, they scream in pain. Their screams haunt me. I'm afraid to feel the pain.  

Everyone is in poor health. Most physically and some mentally. Some of the men die from the poor conditions we are in. Then, there are the ones who can't stand the trenches. They begin to lose their sanity. I try not to go near those men, but I am also beginning to lose my mind. Sometimes, I hear gun noises and no one else hears them. I'm not sure what's real and not real anymore.  

If I survive this, I don't think I'll be the same person as I was before. Please, try not to be afraid of me if I do go back home and I'm not normal. I can't help it after what I have experienced. If I don't go home,  I want you to know how much I love each and everyone of you. I want you to promise to not go into the army, but if you are forced to. Fight until the end.

Sincerely, your big brother Paul Cooper.  

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This is from a project I had to do for History.