A/n
Warning, contains very dark thoughts, subjects and wording.

Update;
It won't let me respond to comments on this chapter for some reason, but I am okay! This chapter is mostly fiction. A few of the words used are ones I've heard, but most if not all of everything else is just a story! No need to worry guys. Anyways, here's the story
                                                              XD

"Perfectionst"

"Emotional"

"Teenage hormones"

Excuses

"It's just a phase"

"You'll get over it"

Excuses

"Happiness is a choice that you can choose"

Excuses

Excuses

ExCuSeS

EXcUSeS

EXCUSES

EXC-

"Petunia Rodice!"

I snap my head up to see a fuming Mrs......

What was her name again?

I never bothered with this teacher. She didn't like be, but she didn't hate me. We were both pretty chill with each other. As long as I paid attention.

And most days I would, but today the thoughts were too much.

I felt the eyes of the other students bore into my back.

"Sorry ma'am"
I mumbled.

"What was that? I couldn't hear you?" She cooed, almost taunting me.

A few students snickered.

I napped and stood up.

"I said I'm god damn sorry for being destructed from class because I want to fucking die!"
I yelled as loud as I could before grabbing my bag and throwing the door open, ignoring the teacher yelling at me.

She tried to reach for me, but her high heels made it easy for me to escape her. I ducked in the nearest bathrooms, didn't even pay attention to what gender it was assigned.

I put my bag on the door and sat on the toilet top, my feet on the seat of the thing to keep my feet from view.

Of course the door was locked, but I didn't want people to know I was here.

"Teenager"

"Hormones"

"Perfectionist"

Excuses

"Emotional"

"It's just a phase"

Excuses

"Happiness is a choice. You need to make it."

Excuses

ExCuSeS

EXcUSeS

EXCUSES

Excuses for how messed up I am

For how depressed I am

For how insane I am

For how much I fear myself

For how much I fear other people

Excuses instead of saying 'I don't know how to help'

Excuses of why it's hard for people like me to reach happiness

People like me

Do they even exist

If so

Where are they

I need them

I need them

I need help

I need to talk

I need to relate

I need to be happy

I need to live

I need to not finish the note that's sitting unfinished in the dark corner of my room

I need to not finish tying that rope

I need to not pull out that razor again

I need help

You know it

So help me