Y/n's POV

my eyes slowly drift open to a bright light. Dame it I left the curtains open. She thought to herself.

The thoughts of what happened last night rolled through her mind. What did he mean by 'worked so hard to forget'?. And will remember my life be worth what ever terrible thing behind that red door. All these thoughts went through her mind until there was a knock on the door.

"Hey Y/n you awake?" A quiet voice asked. There head poked in and it was max.

She gave a small wave of her hand and sat up. She sits against the head of her bed hugging a pillow.

Max walks in properly and sees the concern on her face. "Hey what's wrong?" He asks sitting on the edge of her bed.

"Just a bad dream. Anyway did you want anything?" She asks trying to avoid the further questions of what the dream contained.

"Um I just wanted to see if you wanted to go out today. We could go somewhere do something?" He says almost in a questioning tone.

She pondered for a moment then an idea piped in her head.

"Bowling? Haven't done that in a while" she says, a small smile plays on his lips as if remembering something.

"Bowling sounds great. I know a place" he states getting off he bed. And walking towards the door.

"I'll be out in a minute" she called after him as the door shut. It's nice to see him smile. She thought before getting off the bed a grabbing some clothes.

She decided to wear denim shorts and a crop-top with a long sleeved peach cardigan that sat just above her knees.

Her hair was down while a beanie was on her head. She put some sneakers on a walked out the door, phone in hand.

"Ready?" She questions seeing max walk out of his room.

"Yeah, lets go" he says after a moment. He looked her up and down and smiled. Putting his hand on the small of her back leading her out the door.

• • •

"I win!" She yelled out doing a small victory dancing. Music was blaring and lights were flashing.

It was almost impossible to hear her but he heard it.

She won for the fourth time in a row. He starts to chuckle, standing from the blue seat he was on a walking towards her.

"I think that your cheating" he said giving her a pouty face. She chuckled and put her arms around his neck.

"Am not" she says back. He instantly put his arms around her waist pulling her close to him.

They were so close to eachother she could feel his body heat. Her heart was pounding. She tilted her head up as he tilted his down.

He started to lean down, but she pulled away before they could kiss.

She gave a soft chuckle. "Maybe we should get going" she stated avoiding his pleading stare.

He cleared his throats and nodded. The ride home was more than awkward. Just the music playing in the back ground.

As they approached the drive way Y/n could wait to get out. The tension in the air almost suffocating.

Max stopped the car but didn't get out. The both them sat in silence for a few minutes.

"I'm sorry" Y/n finally spoke surprising max. He raised his eyebrows turning his head to look at her.

"Why would you be sorry, you didn't do anything Y/n" Max softly spoke, concern and surprise evident in his voice.

Tears brimmed Y/n's eyes, she kept her gaze out the window never daring to look at him.

"I can't ever be the same Y/n again. Yet you expect me to, and I'm never going to get back to the stage where I am ok" she paused trying not to have a shakey voice but failing.

"Because if I never remember you or this time we spent together, then I'm not sure if you can make these memories with me"

"Y/n we can get to the place we were" max started but Y/n cut him off tears streaming down her face.

"No you don't get it" y/n yelled "I have this huge hole in my head and it can NEVER be filled. And even if I do get my memories back, I won't want to live, because if these" Y/n said showing her wrists and arms.

"Have ANYTHING to do with my life before this place, the life I want to forget. The life I'd rather die than be apart of then I don't want it back. I don't want to remember you, or this thing we had together"

she finished tears streaming all over her face vision blurred. She heard Max whimper indicating he was cry as well.

She opened the car door and walked out and up the stairs to her room where she locked the door and cried.

Max still in the car, crying his eyes out. He didn't care is anyone say him he just needed to do it.

• • •

Y/n soon fell asleep even despite trying so hard to stay awake. Trying to stay away from the decision that lay ahead of her.