"SHE PUKED ON YOU!" Jordy and Hollis cackle at me. Again.

"Took me a week to get the smell out," I grumble, flicking on ESPN.

Jordy heightens his voice, "How Romantic" clasp his hands and batting his eyelashes.

"Shut up." I breath a chuckle.

I thought cupcakes were nasty before, but I fucking hate them now.

Whose idea was to put frosting on a muffin?

The warmth of Lizzie's vomit saturated my sleeve, making me fling it off my sweatshirt and rip off my whole shirt dramatically like it was on fire.

We spent about an hour in the parking lot while she tried to get the rest of it out. My stomach was in my throat, and I had to be a champ to keep from throwing up myself. I told her not to eat them damn cupcakes.

How could I be angry at Lizzie? Despite the vomit on my sweatshirt, I could never be displeased with her. I probably would've kissed her if she hadn't.

She is too sweet, like sugar. Sugar is good to have, and it tastes good too; yeah, she definitely would taste good, real good.

Relaxing my jaw from a boyish grin, I sit back, reflecting on my sinful thoughts.

Damn, I would love to taste her.

"Sounds like this a recurring thing you got going on," Hollis put his two cents in, tossing a goldfish in his mouth.

"What reoccurring problem," I mock, squinting my eyes.

"Hair in the zipper, getting puked on," Hollis grins wider, and Jordy cackles again.

"Shit happens," I dismiss him, shrugging and watching Lebron eat up the court.

"Sounds like it's love." Jordy making his voice like a southern Belle.

Hollis shoulders bounce, "I say."

"Wait what about Ava?" Jordy furrows his brows.

I groan and throw my head back, "absolutely nothing."

"Should end it if you got something with Big Booty Judy." Jordy playfully twist his lips.

"Nothing has even started. And don't call her that." My lips turn downwards.

"So defensive." Jordy throws his hands up.

And after the shit Ava has been pulling between amping up coming over uninvited and posting more photos of us isn't helping.

I really don't want Lizzie think I'm not unavailable.

"Well Lexi's been raving about how she's been avoiding you too." Hollis smugly grins.

"Key word trying." Rolling my eyes, I let out a chuckle.

Lizzie is too good at her evasive maneuvers, but I'm better. She thought I wouldn't know her schedule, but I keep an eye on her from time to time. Jokes on her, we have practice every Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday.

She thought she was slick, like I wouldn't recognize her with big bifocal glasses and my hoodie for the second time. Her ass haunts me so much in my dreams that I can pick it up out of a lineup.

Her ass should have its own zip code.

I'm not mad she has my shirt either. She looks good in my hoodie. I can only imagine what she looks like in only my shirt, in my bed, under me, over me... My bed is calling for her every night.

Rubbing the side of my face, I relax my smug grin. Hollis and Jordy share a look, then smile from ear to ear at me.

"What?" I sigh in annoyance.

"I mean you don't smile this much with Ava," Jordy teases, making me cut my eyes at him.

"How many times, I have to tell y'all," I groan, making them cackle.

"I know, I just like messin," Jordy jokes.

"I mean, do you like her?" Hollis continues.

"Like who?" I hesitate, slanting my eyes.

"Lizzie," they say in unison.

Popping a goldfish in my mouth, I crack a smile. "I like the idea of her, but it doesn't mean I will follow through," I admit, shrugging my shoulders.

"Soooo, you're just texting her for entertainment?" Hollis presses, lifting a brow.

"If you want to call it like that," I reply, catching a goldfish in my mouth.

"Hollis, he is a fuck boy. Fuck boys don't fall in love," Jordy laughs, earning eye roll from both of us.

"No one talking about love here," I clip, returning my attention to the tv.

"But you sent her flowers though," Hollis mentions arrogantly.

"Is that a problem?" I arch my eyebrow at him, only for him to suck his teeth.

"You can't just lead a girl on like that," Hollis huffs while Jordy nods in agreement. "Especially a nice one."

"I'm not, plus I didn't write it was from me," I confess, shrugging.

They both look at me, surprised. Yes, I sent Lizzie flowers on her first day at her new job. It was the least I could do after she was fired from being my tutor. I really hope it wasn't from the photo. I asked Ms. Nusbaum if there was anything I could do but she said she just wasn't a good fit for the position.

No kidding, Lizzie was terrible at complex math but that hour and forty five minutes for a twenty minute homework assignment was worth it.

Alexis thought my suggestion was the 'cutest' thing in the world, but I told her not to put my name on it. I know I shouldn't go this route, but Lizzie does deserve good things.

"Did you even tell her about the photo?" Jordy asks curiously, and I sigh heavily.

"I was going to go see her tonight to tell her," I reply, checking my phone to see if she replied to my snap, but it's still not open yet.

"You should have told her the night you found out," Hollis articulates, pursing his lips.

"I know damn," I reprimanded, glaring at the tv because now the Lakers are trailing.

That photo has circulated so fast that it's made its way to some blogs. How can people be so intrigued and petty for a blurry image? They don't even know Lizzie yet say horrible things about her.

I'm thankful that they don't know her name, or I will be in more hot water than I'm already in. I informed Coach that the photo had been circulating, and he told me he would take care of it but the photo still won't disappear.

Lizzie doesn't deserve this; shit I don't deserve this shit. Aunt Lisa is right about how troublemakers plant seeds of strife and gossip separate the best of friends.

I don't want to lose Lizzie as a friend over something stupid. We aren't even friends yet, and it sucks because it won't even happen when she finds out about the photo.

"The sooner you tell her, the sooner you both can go through it together," Hollis expresses, and he is right.

I hate when he is fucking right.

Sighing, I begin to text Lizzie until we hear a car door slam outside, rattling the living room windows. Our heads shift to the front door to open by Marcus, pushing his leg to open the door fully with Maxine over his shoulder.

"Put me down," she huffs, fisting his back.

"Ay, don't beat him up! We need him for Syracuse!" Jordy caution, rushing to help Marcus.

She continues to scream profanities. Marcus laughs, slapping her right on her ass with a sound that echoes the entryway.

"Oww Marcus, what the hell!" she yells, squirming in his grip.

"Maxineeee," Jordy cackles, patting her back.

"YOU!" She snaps her ginger-haired head up and viciously points at me.

Oh shit.

Chuckling, I place my phone down on the coffee table. Maxine wrinkles her face at me in disgust.

"Can I help you?" I smugly smile at her.

"Marcus, can you please put me down," Maxine tried to squirm out of his grip, only for him to slap her right on the ass again. She blows her hair in her face, and I chuckle. Obnoxiously, I turn and tilt my head, meeting her at eye-level.

"Is there a reason you are upside-down?" I taunt her.

Marcus sucks his teeth as Maxine lays a final blow on his back. Marcus eases her down, and Maxine folds her arms with her hair frizzy and wild over the place.

"Damn Maxine," Marcus grumbles, rubbing his back.

"If you don't control your bitch, I will," Maxine jabs me with her manicured nail.

"What are you talking about?" I question, slanting my eyes at her.

"She was about to beat Ava's ass in Starbucks," Marcus explains, earning an eye roll from her.

"Is that what white girls do now days." Jordy jokes but nobody is laughing .

A rush of anger begins to cloud my judgment when Maxine scoffs at me. I'm up on my feet before I know where I'm going.

"What happened?" I ask, walking to the door.

"Oh, I'll tell you what happened!" Maxine growls.

Before I shut the door, my eyes fall on Lizzie swallowed up in Maxine's leather jacket. Her brown eyes are light, almost golden, swollen, and red in the corners as if she's been crying.

Shit.

"Here." She lifts up my neatly folded sweatshirt, handing it back to me with shaky hands.

"No stop, what are you doing?" I push it forward, but she pushes it back.

"Lizzie, don't give him that back!" Maxine snaps, causing her to step backward. "We can still burn it."

"You can have it back." Lizzie shakes her head and hands it to me. Concern washes over me as she quickly walks down the porch stairs. I touch her wrist with one stride, catching her.

"Wait, wait, what happened? Talk to me," I console, looking down at her.

Our eyes dance at each other, and she let out a weary sigh.

"I don't want to talk about it." Lizzie pushes some black strands out of her face and looks away.

Another reason this girl challenges me is how she doesn't talk. She thinks first, probably too much, and the way her eyes fill with unspoken thoughts, I know something bad happened to her.

"Lizzie," I repeat gently.

She drops her eyes, like she could hardly look at me. "I didn't mean to get in between you and your girlfriend," she softly whispers.

I catch her wrist again just as she turns away. "Girlfriend? What, Lizzie, I don't have a girlfriend," I ramble, softly clasping her hand, only for her to pull away.

"You don't have to lie." She looks at me with tears welling in her eyes, shining them like mirrors.

Fuck.

"I'm not shit, no Lizzie you got it all wrong." I reach to touch her but she moves her small body from me like fire.

"Jaylan, it's better if we don't talk to each other anymore," she expresses meekly. Her shoulders are curled inward, her other arm hugging her stomach like she's trying to make herself smaller.

The too-familiar signs point to a sore point with me, bullying. She turns her back from me again, heading to Alexis's car that's just pulled up by the curb.

"Lizzie," I call out, following her, rushing to her quick small feet

"Goodbye, Jaylan," she softly recites in a flat voice.

Her quick small feet move but I stop her, "wait wait hold up hold on."

The way she turn her lips downward drop my heart when she looks down at the ground. "I don't want to talk to you right now."

"Can you tell me what happened?" I urge, flickering my eyes at her.

"No." She softly chokes, holding back her tears. When I reach to touch her, she shifts her body away. "Wait Wait. Wait baby girl." I release a soft chuckle as she so quick not communicate.

Lizzie whimpers looking away but I take to fingers to turn her to meet my eyes which is big mistake because their the most lightest brow I don't ever want to see again. "No." A faint whisper escape from her lips.

"Whatever Ava did or said, she means nothing to me, okay?" I rub the back of my neck. She tips her chin down, hiding those beautiful light brown eyes from me.

"You don't have to explain anything to me, Jaylan," she utters, adjusting herself in the jacket.

"But I do, look Lizzie fuck..." I sigh disconsolately.

Her eyes soften, letting a tear fall. This is about to end very badly. To be selfish is comfortable, but vulnerability builds character.

Rubbing the back of my head, she waits for my confession and holds the backs of her arms.

Humility washes over me making my chest tighten up. "Look." I take a breath.

I hate being vulnerable.

We stand in silence but our eyes never leave each other. "Lizzie, what Ava and I-"

"It doesn't matter." She clips back quickly.

"Let me explain." I softly groan.

"Why didn't you tell me about the photo."

I freeze like my feet were molded in the cement.

Fucking Ava.

"I wanted to tell you the night when you puked all over me but you were already feeling had an-"

She holds up her tiny hand, "You still could have told me." Her thick Spanish accent coming out.

"I know but I didn't want to hurt you because I like you and-"

A weight releases off my chest, which lasts one second before Lizzie's reaction pains me.

"But you didn't tell me, and now everyone thinks I'm im a ss-slut." She whispers softly.

"What no!" I reach out but she moves back from me.

"Was I just a game to you?"

"Lizzie. No" I softly say.

"Do you even really like me?"

"Yes but I don't well I just want to be friends with you right now." I confess.

"Then why are you texting me like you are interested in me. And you are with Ava." Her lips turn down as a grimace comes across her face. Her eyes widen and her shoulders slump. 

I couldn't even make a conscious statement and my words pile up in my throat.

Her voice sounds weak, strained, and raspy, "Please stay away from me."

Sadness clouds her eyes, her lashes blink rapidly, and she looks down at her feet. A tear trails over her cheek and lands right down on the pavement.

My fingers twitch at my sides right when she turns and bolts. She hurls herself down the stairs so far, I don't know how she doesn't fall, but she keeps going towards Alexis' car.

"Look, I- Lizzie," I call out, quickly running after her.

"Just stay away from me, Jaylan," her voice breaks and cracks, twisting a painful wedge into my heart.

"Lizzi-"

She slams the car door in my face and blocks my view, covering her hands over her face. Alexis glances at me from her seat but touches Lizzie's shoulder.  I rush to the car door like a mad man I don't want to end like this.

I bang on the window "Lizzie come on we can talk about this."

Alexis shakes her head no as she
reaches over to hug Lizzie but she pushes her away. The last I see of her is her head tipped down, almost touching her knees, her shoulders pitching violently.

Fuck

With squealing tires, Alexis pulls out and off, not even looking at me.

She's the last person that deserved that.

Watching Alexis drive off with Lizzie makes me realize one sobering thing, maybe we were meant to meet, but not meant to be. I guess it was for the better anyway. I don't deserve her anyway. So much was said unsaid just then, and I think I'll have to leave it at that.

Running my hand over my face, I walk back inside to see everyone staring at me with the same look of judgment but in different forms.

Hollis mumbles, 'I told you so,' corresponding with Jordy pursing his lips, looking in the other direction.

Shutting the door behind me, Ginger Demon glares at me, her green eyes swirling as she's probably planning how to get away with murder.

"Jaylan, you should have told me about the photo," Maxine begins,clenching her fist tightly.

"I was going to; I was handling it," I vouched while she rolled her eyes.

"This is exactly why I didn't want her not around you," Maxine fumes, shaking her head.

I hold my neck as Maxine steps forward to me.

"Look, I'm sorry, I can't control what Ava does," I bark back, reaching for my keys off the end table.

"It's not about Ava right now; you can't just play with Lizzie's emotions like that! She not one of your fuck toys," Maxine sighs and cups her forehead. "She can't... disconnect her feelings."

"I know that," I snap back, only for her to heave her brow at me.

"No, you don't, Jaylan; If you did, you wouldn't have gotten into her feelings!" Maxine yelled, balling her fists.

I was a bit taken back from the confession because Lizzie is very hard to read. I didn't know she had a crush on me. I just thought she just blushed because it was her natural, shy reaction for her. 

Man, she really has me fooled. This is first time I got a math problem wrong on a woman, fuck. I didn't want her to like me. That was the last thing I wanted.

I rub my hands over my face trying to hold the anger and guilt stirring in me like a tornado.

"It's not my fault she fell for me so quic-"

Before I could finish my sentence, my right cheek radiates with a piercing sting chased by a loud smack. Maxine's expression hardens, glaring at me with fire as she lowers her hand.

"Stay the fuck away from Lizzie! Marcus, take me home," Maxine orders.

Marcus bites the inside of his cheek as he opens the door for Maxine, sending me an obvious 'I told you so' look before shutting the door behind them. Jordy and Hollis scurry off up the stairs, leaving me shaking with anger and guilt running in my veins. My skin is crawling like I want to burst out of it and I want to drive both my fists into a wall.

Closing my hands with my keys, I leave out the door. Aunt Lisa and Mom always told me to respect women no matter how much they wrong me. But tonight, that's out the window when I'm through with Ava.

She has gone too far with stealing Lizzie's clip, trying to tarnish her name, and God knows what else she did to Lizzie this evening. Fuck, I wouldn't be surprised if she got fired from her tutoring job because of the picture, because of me.

This is all my fault, and for once, I know I need to fix it. Lizzie will never talk to me again, and I know Maxine and Alexis will make sure that happens.

I was trying to avoid this shit. I should not have entertained Lizzie's mind like that, but could you blame me for enjoying our banter? In my dark life, I caught some rays of sunshine and enjoyed the comforting, warm glow.

I'm selfish, and I know that will never change. You're not born being selfish. Selfishness is created when you learn to take care and rely on yourself, to the point where you put yourself above others. I know it shouldn't justify my actions for what I've done to Lizzie, but I selfishly want what she has to offer.

She is sugar to me. The few moments I've had with Lizzie awakened something in me I thought I never would feel again, and I probably won't feel ever again because the little we had is now over.

Clenching my hands on the wheel, my eyes glare at a recognizable silver Mercedes. I park my car and hastily get out. Every step I take, anger rises up into my throat. Ava's light in her room is on, illuminating the night sky with a yellowish glow.

My fist makes a pounding echo through the neighborhood, provoking the neighborhood dogs to howl and bark.

"Ava, open the door," I command, repeatedly pounding it, knocking off the floral wreath down.

Light footsteps come to the door. My chest is heaving, my breath becomes ragged, and I rub my jaw as the door swings open.

I'm welcomed with her in a baby pink silk robe that's loosely clinging to her shoulders. She pushes her blonde curls to the side and flickers her eyes up and down.

"What," she spat.

"Let me in," I command, pushing my way through.

She stumbles back and huffs, slamming her door behind her. "What," she repeats with an attitude.

"If you continue to send the photo, then I will report you for cyberbullying," I threaten, only for her to tip her head back and laugh sarcastically.

"Leave." She points to the door.

"Ava, I'm not kidding, end the shit now," My voice booms through the living room, echoing off the walls.

"This conversation could be done with a text," she clips, folding her arms across her chest.

"Clearly, everything is a joke to you, so how about losing your opportunity cheering for the NBA? That might change your mind," I raise my voice louder, only for her cheeks to pinch.

"Don't you dare throw that at me when you sell drugs like some hoodlum," She claps back.

I clench my jaw because we both have incriminating shit above our heads.

"Yeah, didn't think I saw your little stash in your room," She accused, tilting her head at me. "Did you?"

"You know nothing," I scold, heaving my brow.

"I know more than enough, Jaylan, more than you will ever know," she warns me.

"Ava, just let it go; we are both not good for each other," I sigh grievously, rubbing my hands over my face.

"How do you even know Jaylan? You never gave me a chance," Ava stresses, formulating tears that have zero effect on me.

"Ava, I gave you a chance," I remind her, silencing her pain. "And you walked away from it."

"You know that's not true," she breathes out, not looking at me.

"What's not true? The fact your parents don't want their precious daughter being in a relationship with a Black man?" I reveal how much more I know than she thinks while she lowers her head.

"Stop, Jaylan, you know that's not true," she agonizes, holding her arm.

"Stop what? The truth?" I chuckle as a tear falls down her face.

Anger continues to boil in me because the only one who deserves to cry right now is Lizzie and shit even myself for all the shit Ava's caused. When Ava cries, it's a manipulation tool to get what she wants. When I saw Lizzie cry it was a cry of raw, pure, undeserved pain cast on her.

"You can't dish it out but can't take it, huh?" I mock.

"Stop," she whispers harshly and closes her eyes.

"Stop what, the truth?" I taunt,

"Please go," she whispers, keeping her eyes closed and brushing her blonde hair behind her ears.

"Just admit it, Ava. You fetishized Black men to get back at your parents for making you break up with your high school sweetheart. Then you try to mold me into being him?" I cut deep, allowing silence to surround us.

Her head remains low, she's not lifting it under the weight of the truth. Tears fall from her face, decorating her carpet. "Go."

"That's what I thought. We're done, Ava. Leave Lizzie the fuck alone. Give me back her hair clip, matter-of-fact, give me my fucking car key while you're at it. Pack all my shit up," I rant at her, and she huffs loudly..

"Fuck you Jaylan!" she screams loudly, tears sloppily running everywhere as she stomps away.

I never been so fucking angry in my life but Ava has pushed me to the edge. This is the shit she does over and over and honestly I'm done with it. I lean against the front door and pull out my phone to text Lizzie.

What am I even going to say? I'm sorry doesn't feel like enough.

I sigh, trying to figure out what to say to her but a sense of darkness restrains me not to do it.

She doesn't need me anyway.

I puff out some air and begin to type and erase the same message for a good three minutes.

Forget it.

"Fuck, Ava hurry up!" I yell, hearing all this meltdown sobbing and commotion upstairs.

Loud stomping comes downstairs with a large black trash bag of my things, which she throws at me. "LEAVE!"

"Where is the clip?"

"It's in the trash where it belongs." She points at the black bag

"If this shit broken, I'm making Maxine really kick your ass,"

With that, I walk out for the last time because Ava no longer has the ball in her court. With the hard look on her face and history of her behavior, I know it's not going to be easy.

Edited by: still_just_me