I'm done for.

I hope this is the last cold shower I take for the rest of the week.

"Shit," I groan loudly in the shower, releasing my cock and letting the last of my frustrations drip down to the drain.

My head throbs as I rest my palms forward on the shower wall, letting the brisk sting roll over my shoulders and down my back.

This dream did me in and made me stiff as a rock. My cock felt like it was going to rip out of its skin and stayed like that as I walked into the shower.

This time, Lizzie's wildly riding on top of me, her dark hair spilling over her shoulders and puddling onto my chest.

My hard, upward thrusts made her breasts flop and flushed her cheeks bright pink. Lips parted and head flung back, her angelic moans and dirty native language sang to me in my mind. The grab on her ass, the warm, soft flesh clenched in my fingers, felt so real, it was almost like she was here.

The last forty-eight hours since I saw Elizabeth Lucero have been nothing but beautifully torturous nightmares.

My left hand is so cramped I might not grip the ball right today in practice. Every porn fantasy I can fucking think of, she is there. Her breasts, her ass, fuck her beautiful face just turn me on.

But what's really scary is, I like her energy too and I want to be around it.

I've never been tripped on a girl like this...

Shit.

She got me bricked up and fucked up.

Elizabeth is problematic for me, and I hate it.

I can look, but I can't touch.... yet.

She's got me fully sprung over her beauty, soft, candied voice, corny jokes, honey-filled laughter, kindness, ambition, purity, discipline, and intellect.

If just an hour and forty-five minutes did that.....what more would it be spending a whole day with her. I never get this hung over a girl, let alone let one live rent-free in my head.

Damn, she is sitting real cozy in my mind, and I want her to leave but still at the same time...

Welcome home, Lizzie.

The most torturous part? She doesn't know what she does to men around her, what she does to me.

Within two minutes, I'm dragging my chair over so I can smell that faint vanilla. Her honey-smooth skin is blemished and untouched next to my inked up sleeve. She just blinks up at me with those innocent, doe-shaped brown eyes. Up close they're warm, rich, and loving.

As much as I want to forget it, the moment she messed up a question replays itself. Innocent as Lizzie herself, it started after we watched the video on z-scores.

"Seems easy," Lizzie says quietly and opens her book in between both of us.

"So..." I hover my right index finger over the sea of numbers. "Where?"

"Here." Her small fingers wrap around my finger. My gut clenches tight at her fisted fingers while she drags my finger to the numbers at the top.

"First find the critical value," she says softly but none of me is listening.

My damn finger throbs and I blink back the obvious dirty images, those fingers wrapped around another - and much bigger, thank you Big Red - part of me. I clench my teeth.

Only when Lizzie's lashes blink up at me do I realize she's dropped my finger. My cock is practically poking up through the damn table for its turn.

A grin spreads across my face and I distract her by tapping where she pointed in the table. "This says p-value, Lizzie."

Just like that, her face turned pink and sent my mind back into the gutter. All I could do is shove another one of her peach candies in my mouth and chew hard to distract myself.

I was fucked even as we left. After sitting so close, I couldn't resist touching her hair. Soft as silk, it slipped through my fingers like -

I need to stop before I'm hard again.

I'm astonished she is not with anyone; she is wife material.

I understand why Big Red and Alexis got her on high security for a reason. They probably want her with some nerdy computer science major or preppy accountant.

After our little mishap, Lizzie was so embarrassed she cupped her face in her hands. I tried to make it up to her by extending an invite to take her out to Red Robin. I just wanted to spend more time getting to know her, banter with her a bit even.

Once again she turn me down something about Snowman day and Elsa? Some fucking shit.

I offered to drive her to her friends apartment but God must have known what I was up to because when her butterfly clip was not where I put it, her only mission was to be like a K-9 and search my car from top to bottom.

We searched the car for a good ten minutes until Firecracker showed up, catching me in the act staring at Lizzie's ass as she hinged over my trunk....

Man, she has a round ass

The look of disappointment of her missing hair clip rocked me a bit because I swore I put on the vizor.

I think I apologized fifteen times, and Ginger demon couldn't help but add her faintly evil laughter of repeating myself like a broken record.

As sweet as honey, Lizzie said if it shows up, then just let her know. The weighted pain in her doe eyes finally did it for me, making me rush home and search for myself yet, I could not find the damn clip.

I immediately asked Jordy, but he said it was on my vizor the last time he saw it. Unfortunately, knowing how moral Jordy can be, he probably hid it thinking he was doing a deed hiding it from Ava. I'm not afraid of her, and for the last time, she is not my girlfriend.

I sigh grievously, turning off the shower, running my hands over my face, regrouping, and walking into my room. That dream had me in, damn it. I have to think happy thoughts, clean thought-

Giggles🧸 : Did you find it? 🥺

Why do I hear her voice in my head?

Me: Still looking 🤦🏾‍♂️

Three grey dots pop up, making my heart flutter a bit.

Lizzie: Oh 🍝

A soft chuckle slips out my lips, cocking my eyebrow at her  message, texting her back.

Me: ?????

Three grey dots prompt back up.

Giggles🧸: Oops, sorry I meant to say spaghetti sauce! Stupid Siri on my apple watch!

I couldn't help but laugh, chucking my phone across my bed. This girl going to be the death of me. If these eight weeks don't go by fast, I will lose my damn mind. I can't be this hung up on her when I barely know her.

For all I know, she might be as crazy as Ava... Nah, no one is bat shit crazy than her.

Or manipulating like Gabrielle.

I guess toxic people find toxic people. It's like a cycle. I don't think I would be ever good for Lizzie and I just have to remind myself of that.

I slump my shoulders and shut my eyes. Lizzie's innocence is contagious and it's infectious.

Unfortunately someone like Lizzie deserves to be with someone like Jordy or hell Marcus. For me, I wouldn't even know where to begin like that.

"Ohhhh! Marcus, right there," Big Red's screams magnify through the house.

I shake my head, slipping on my game day shirt over my head. At least someone's getting action in this house... correction, two people. I saw Alexis leave out of Hollis' room pretty bright,early, and freshly fucked.

Man, what is happening to me. I must have gotten soft or some shit.

I feel like ginger demon has not left this house since last Friday. She never goes home and she fucks more than I do. Every time I'm here, she is here. Every time I leave and come back, she still fucking here. I low key think she's just keeping a close eye on me to make sure I don't bring Lizzie back here.. but that would never happen.

My lips curl up at the thought of her being in this room. I'd take her on every surface -

Fuck, I gotta stop.

"Yes... Ohhh..!" Big Red screams. The loud shameless skin slap echoes down the hall.

Grinning boyishly, I slip on my black Nike Flex Stride Running Shorts.

Should I?

Nah...

Not releasing my boyish grin, I tie my Nike Kyrie 7. I release a hearty chuckle, hearing Marcus's headboard banging against the wall and muffled screams.

They are so fucking nasty.

My shoulders relax when my focus locks with a small silver frame of my mom and I at my first win in baseball.

That was the last time she smiled with contentment. I'll never forget the encouraging words my mom told me. It took her ten minutes for me to finally smile in that photo.

I keep this photo because I liked my mom this way. The happy single mother who made it. She made something out of herself and supported herself without a man to do it.

She proudly wore her navy-blue scrubs in this photo because she almost missed the game in reality. Sometimes we take pictures for granted until that person is no longer with us. I feel like a photograph is the pause button of life.

Man, I miss her.

I walk out of my room to silence finally and walk past Marcus' room, where his groans are as loud as hers. My feet come to a complete halt.

Should I?

Pounding my fist to the door, I holler with a smug grin, "Don't be late for the game, captain!"

"Shut up, Jaylan," Marcus grunts.

Leaning my ear to the door, I laugh silently, hearing them bicker about not knowing I was here.

"I'm going to pick up Lizzie now," I tease partially because Marcus needs to get fucking ready. "Give her a ride in my -"

At that threat, the door swings open, and I duck back at a raging redhead, illuminating hydrant red cheeks with dark green sheet around her body gripping the top.

"Don't even think about it, tiny dick," Dragon fires blazes with her words

"Why," I arrogantly prompt.

"She is smart enough not fall for your-"

"Yo Max, get back here," Marcus laughs.

She turns, pressing her lips together, "Don't tell me what to d-"

The door slam shuts, and I laugh, hearing Marcus tell Red Light District to chill so they can finish what I interrupted. He is truly bold doing that.

"Don't be late!" I tease.

"Shut up!"

I throw head back in laughter and make my way down the stairs
"Stephen Hollisssss!"

The knucklehead is sprawled out on the sofa with his leg propped out like he didn't have any manners.

"S'up boss." He chuckles, not moving an inch but flashing me a cheesy grin. He better get his ass moving.

"You coming with me?" I question, slipping on my team sweatshirt.

"Nahhh, I'm going out with Lexi later after the game." His grin widens, not moving his eyes from his phone.

"So you stole Derek Thompson's girl?" I chuckle.

He sucks his teeth and sits up, "That clown doesn't know the first thing about how to treat a beautiful woman like Lexi."

That was publicly ugly break up I wouldn't even do myself despite Ava and I's whatever you want to call it.

"Why are my roommates falling for the most strong-headed women on campus," I groan, stating the obvious.

He just laughs and smugly responds, "Jealous?"

"Hollis." Laughing, I dismissing the subject because the last thing I need is him putting ideas in Alexis's mind; I don't need her on my case too.

"Ava still waiting?" He mocks presumptuously.

She will be waiting till her face turns blue. I roll my eyes, opening the door, "Don't entertain that shit, man."

He throws his head back, cackling, and holds his left hand over his chest. "Clearly it's all over her social media."

"It's one fucking photo."

"Actually there is a few here." Hollis tease scrolling through his phone. He holds up a photo of Ava and I in DC inside the National Art Gallery.

Wasn't my scene in the slightest. Rich white folk definitely not my scene. We may look happy but I didn't feel happy. That was the night I met her parents and it was not a happy greeting.

"Oh and this oneee." He shows a toothy grin with a photo of Ava and I at the sweet sixteen game match up last year.

"I get the point." Shoving his bright ass phone out my face.

"All I'm saying is either you be with her or don't be with her." He shrugs, as the truth sinks in my gut.

Image wise it would be good for the NBA but for sanity purposes I like to keep. We had our ups and downs but she just is not the one. I like what we have because it's convenient but I need to cut ties with her soon."

"Orrrrr you can holla at Lexi's best friendddd." He sings with this big ass grin.

Warmth spreads across my cheeks and Hollis throws his head back and cackles.

"Nah," I shake the thoughts of Lizzie out of my head but keep coming back.

"You can't deny it." He holds up his phone and poses.

"A. don't ever say holla again and B I'm not denying anything." I fold my arms.

"Why she is sweet, innocent kind. Help you with not get trapped with a baby." Hollis shares a toothy grin.

I suck my teeth and roll my eyes, "it ain't even like that."

"I think you should." He sings with his voice.

"I think you should mind your businessss" I mock back twisting open the door knob.

"You can't hide what you feel inside Cap." Hollis winks at me.

"I'm not hiding nothin." Hollis smile doesn't fade away and he wiggles his eye brows. "I'm a good wing man cap."

I press my lips, "Don't be late." I grumble, slamming the door behind me. Pressing the car remote, I unlock the door to get in.

"Don't be jealous." Repeating Holli's obscene words, I shake my head. He is out of his mind, just like everyone on this damn campus.

My situation with Ava was and still is messy. I blame myself for getting wrapped up in her madness when I was weak.

To be honest, we were just friends at first. We met during our college visit together. I honestly wasn't attracted to her, mainly because I didn't really mess with white women, no offense.

Ava got me at a vulnerable time, after my breakup with Gabrielle. I couldn't believe how stupid I was to open up to her about it. I'm even more naïve to think Ava actually cared.

Ava doesn't know everything, but she knows enough to know how to crush my spirit. Ava showed her true colors after I tried to end it with her the first time in sophomore year. She plays these sick games and fucks up my mind. The things I shared with Ava in private, she used it in revenge every time I wanted to end it. Hanging shit over my head.

It's funny how Gabrielle, Ava and PJ are the same exact people, only looking out for themselves because no one did it for them. They both thrive on my grief, twist it deeper into me, and use it to their advantage.

As much as I want to end my relationships with them, I still feel like I need them in some shape or form or just good closure.

Turning onto campus, I sigh deeply. The event lights illuminate brightly, highlighting in hues of blue sunset brightening my eyes.

Several students and event staff happily shake their 'fear the turtle' direction signs leading to the Xfinity Center.

Tonight, we play our lovely interstate ninety five corridor neighbor, Rutgers University. They are pretty mediocre if you ask me. Their defense can use some work, so Jordy and Hollis will be all over that.

Passing the Science of Health building, my eyes narrow in on the beautiful nightmares' raven hair pulled back into a high ponytail with a light purple satin scrunchie.

I tighten the wheel as my eyes set fire to the toffy brown-haired wannabe Justin Bieber drug addict, Peter Kennedy. He's playfully bantering with her, comparing his height to her. They were both wearing white lab coats and comparing who was better.

The fuck.

She threw her head back in laughter and looked back at a tall girl with teal ombré hair who's wiggling her eyebrows.

She definitely has an interesting choice of friends.

Peter touches her, playfully pushing her shoulder. Anger started to creep down my veins, my hands continuing to tighten the wheel. He pulls his phone out of his coat pocket and hands it to Lizzie, who marvels at his actions.

Oh, fuck no.

Maneuvering over carelessly, I swiftly pull up in front of the curb. Students began to whisper, recognizing my car.

Peter turns his head to avoid minimal eye contact, cursing under his breath because he still owes me for the last time and thinking I didn't forget.

Lizzie looks at him, arching her brow until she shifts her eyes over to widen her eyes at my car. My chest tightens strangely at how her eyes light up, probably assuming I found her hair clip.

"S'up Lizzie," I call out nodding at her.  Peter steps back.

"Hi Jaylan." Her sweet voice beams. Lizzie rock on her heels back and forth. She relaxes her smile and locks her gaze with me, looking through her eyelashes at me.

Her teal-headed friend nudges her in excitement, and she snaps her eyes back up at her, muttering stop it. Chuckling, I lick my bottom lip as I rub my chin.

"What are you doing here?" she shyly says, stepping up to my car.

The light warm sugar vanilla scent she carries with her intrigues me, adjusting my hand on the wheel.

"I can't say hi." My lips curl up and Lizzie sweet laughter fills my ears.

Girls in her class whisper and giggle as Lizzie streaks of pink spread across her cheeks. The dork I catch Lizzie talking too comes from time to time, comes up and rest his elbow on her shoulder. He focuses his attention on me with a sharp look.

The fuck.

"Spencer." Lizzie giggles his name and moves his arm gently. His sharp look drops at me.

Coward.

"I'll be waiting at the car." This so called Spencer tells the teal haired girl and Lizzie.

He gives me one last look and I smirk, "Tough guy huh." I nod up at him and he discreetly rolls his eyes. He walks backwards and trips over the bench but keeps his eyes on me.

"Are you okay Spencer?" Lizzie giggles draw my attention.

He gives her a thumbs up with a crocked smile and turns his back with slump shoulders.

Lizzie laughter lingers and I meet my eyes to hers when she turns and faces me.

"Always laughing," I tease, admiring her and revealing her cheeks that are starting to turn rosy pink.

Fuck, just like in my dream.

"Jaylan, a day without laughter is a day wasted," she gently exclaims, her mouth curving up into a warm smile.

"Right." My own smile fades as my eyes trail over her shoulder to look at Peter still waiting on Lizzie.

"Did you find it," she lifts her eyes focusing into my car.

"I'm still looking," I confess, a white lie because after looking for two hours, I gave up.

"Oh," her smile disappears.

"It will show up," I encourage her, still looking at Peter, who has not left and not catch a hint like the dork.

"I'll catch you later, Lizzie," Peter happily points at her. She turns, sending a polite wave.

"No, you won't," I arrogantly state, keeping his ego in check.

My eyes glare at him like a hawk walking to that beat up old blue Honda Civic as Lizzie's forehead crinkles. She's about to say something but holds back her comment, closing her mouth.

"Bye, Jaylan, Have a good game." Lizzie steps back from the car window.

Her encouragement is like fire to my feet.

"Thanks." I lick my lower lip. "I'll see you around, Giggles," I wink.

Her friend bumps shoulders with Lizzie, sending a blush across those soft cheeks of hers. She waves goodbye slowly.

This will officially mark seventy two hours of encountering Lizzie. Every time I talk to her scares me because I just want to be around her, but that's just wishful and foolish thinking.

Turning off my car, I grab my Beats and Nike bag. Fans shout my name, and I wave as I head inside. The parking lot is packed and ready for this matchup.

Some fans and students line up by the door, wearing my number, ready to get a seat. Their support spreads warmth across my chest, knowing soon it will be an NBA jersey in replacement. April will be here as soon as I know it, and I wish it would come sooner than later.

But the one thing I'm not looking forward to is the press. I can't stand people all up in my business who I don't know acting like they know my story before they ask a single damn question.

An athlete's biggest pet peeve.

Ducking my head down, I quicken my pace and rush inside the red and yellow door. Walking around the corner, macho laughter and chatter fill the locker room, Drake in the background.

On my arrival,Taylor grins smugly and starts clapping, making everyone's face twist in confusion until they realize I've showed up. My mouth curls up in surprise as they greet me with cheers and applause.

"Mannnn, I knew you were a freak," Taylor hoots, hoping down from the bench.

"What are you talking about?" I chuckle faintly and put my Nike bag in my cubby hole.

"Shorty with the black hair,"Xavier entions, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Huh?" not following their stupidity while slipping off my sweatshirt.

"Oh, I see how it is," Taylor laughs, leaning on the side of me.

"I don't know what you are talking about," I chuckle, pairing my phone to my beats.

"Stop playing games," Jordy laughs, adding to my confusion.

"I hope y'all not this clouded in your mind during the game," I rebuke them. Taylor and Xavier grin bigger causing me to wrinkle my nose.

"Your mind probably clear as day. So we will be just fine," Rashad grumbles and rolls his eyes.

"Bro, what the fuck are you talking about." My irritation starts to rise at their stupidy. I feel like I've walked into an inside joke where I'm the punchline.

"You know what we are talking about." Taylor teases.

Jordy looks at me, down at his phone, and back at me. I slant my eyes and yank his cellphone. My vision crosses slightly, trying to focus on this blurred phot- oh shit.

Anger sweeps over me and I close my eyes like I didn't just see that photo. "How the fu-yo, delete this shit right now," I scold Jordy, shoving his phone in his chest.

This cannot be happening right now.

The photo shows me towering over Lizzie on her knees and her head right at my crotch level with her hair frenzly covering her face. Her hand palms my thigh and from the angle, it looks like she's giving me fucking head. You could barley even see shit for it being so blurry. 

My blood surges faster through my veins and I clutch Jordy's phone tightly, even though I just want to throw it into a wall.

Who the fuck in their right mind would take a photo of the most embarrassing moment for Lizzie?

This is some straight childish high school shit. Elizabeth is too kind to be bullied and whoever took this photo is heartless to send it to every damn body. Who the fuck would even be there around the time anyway?

"Fuck!" I groan loudly as the guys try to hold their snickers. I cut my eyes at them, and they cease.

"It's quite tasteful for the team Instagram tho," Jordy quietly mentions, his eyes on his phone like he's worried I'll break it.

"Delete it," I threaten him with sharp eyes.

A low groan rumbles my throat as I look at the photo again. It's blurry but I'm obviously identifiable. The way I'm looking down at Lizzie like I want to fucking devour her isn't helping.

Damn, is that how I - not important.

"If I have to, the whole team has too," Jordy squeaks but gets quiet at the end.

Clenching my fist, Jordy and Xavier step back; as they tremble, holding their phones. I walk over to the bench, stomping my foot loudly echoing through the locker room.

"AY YO," I shout.

Chatter continues through the locker room.

I tighten my jaw, my anger ignited from being ignored. "AY YO, LISTEN UP!" The chatter abruptly stops, narrowing the attention all on me.

"Take out your phones and delete that fucking photo now!" I bark, my voice echoing off the walls.

Not a soul tried to test me because they all listened to the command getting on their phones. Silence fills the air; I jump down from the bench, watching to ensure everyone deleted the photo.

I'm a dead man.

Big Red and Alexis are going to murder me and toss my body into the Potomac. I shudder at the thought of Ginger Demon strangling me to death while Alexis holds me down, then both stuff me into the trunk of her Jeep.

"Who sent this shit?" I gruff at Jordy, whose face tenses up.

"Faith," he mumbles, lowering his shoulders. My mind couldn't register how quickly I walk out of the locker room.

"Jaylan Jaylan, over here," an annoying local news anchor tries to get my attention.

Swallowing my frustration, I turn around on my heels.

"Jaylan, what your thoughts on Rutgers's defense?" the microphone comes so close to my lips that I step back and clench onto my beats.

"I think it will be a good matchup," I respectfully advocate, because the last thing I want is more freaking problems.

"Jaylan, Jaylan," they continue to call out, but I make my way into the gym quickly, walking in on my mission.

A DJ mixture of Rihanna's latest hits blurs throughout the gymnasium overhead as my eyes search for the blonde culprit.

"1...3...5..7," The half-naked demons chant over the music.

"Ava!" I bark.

I walk in front of them, folding my arms and observing them taking over the gym. They know they have their own area to practice.

"Relax, Jaylan," Faith harshly breathes, still keeping on the beat to their half-time routine.

My eyes slant at Ava, who winks at me while in a cheer stunt. She air kisses me, and I roll my eyes. "Ava!"

"Really Jaylan we are practicing." Faith grumbles.

Anger rushes through my veins because that photo has her name written all over it.

What baffles me is how the hell she knew where I was Wednesday because I've avoided her for five days now.

The guy holding her up puts her down clean and gracefully. She trots over, smug as fuck and happily, and I adjust my arms over my folded chest.

"Hi." Playing innocent, she kisses me on the side of the lips. Ava presses her tits against my chest, but I push her back in the process. She scoffs and flares her nostrils.

"We need to talk," I command, stepping to the side away from watchful pupils.

"About what, baby?" Ava coos, touching my arm.

I shift my arm away, "Stop." Scolding her, I catch her hand from rubbing it up and down.

"Stop what?" she asks coyly as she  sparkles her eyes.

"I don't know what shit you're trying to pull but stay the fuck away from Elizabeth Lucero," I pin my eyes at her.

"Jaylan, what are you talking about?" Ava laughs, trying to touch me again.

"Don't fucking play dumb," I bitterly snap, throwing her hand down.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She scoffs, placing her hand on her hip.

"Tell all your little cult followers to delete the photo and stop sending it," I snapped at her quietly, only for her to crinkle her forehead.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she deadpans me, pressing her lips together.

"Since you want to play dumb about not knowing what you did, what we got is done. I'm done with your bullshit," I spat.

"Is that a threat," she snorts like she doesn't believe me, but the shock in her eyes shows she's appalled.

"It's a promise," I assure her, stretching my hands and feeling the anger rush down my veins.

"Oh, Jaylan," she pities, tracing her finger across my chest. "We both know I'll be over tonight." She bites her lower lip.

"I'm serious, Ava," I harshly hitch my breath and hold back from slapping her hand away from me. Instead, I step back for much-needed breathing space.

"Cute. I'll see you after the game," Ava mimics.

She turns back and winks at me, boiling my blood. When she turns around, her blonde hair flows in the air purposely for me to see Lizzie's butterfly clip pinning it back.

My fists tighten at my sides, my jaw clenches shut, and all I see is red.

"Ava!"

All I see is red.

How could I forget that I had given her an extra key to my car?

Edited by: still_just_me