According to Web MD, I have about thirty minutes to live and only a ten percent chance of a possible recovery, after palliative care, radiation therapy, homeopathic alternatives, and comfort medications.

Jaylan gave me the kissing bug.

The common thing that happens in college after your first kiss.

Smiling, I take a tissue to my swollen nose, glowing so brightly red. I have to make sure Santa doesn't think Rudolph is partying on UMD's Campus.

Moving my mouse around on my laptop, I smile at Jaylan and I's photo on my background. Its us with a large 7-11 slurpee at a location he used to go to growing up. He knows everyone in that neighborhood and everyone knows him. He's kissing me in that photo and also kissed my brain freeze away.

It was so romantic.

I sniffle, holding up another tissue to my nose and glancing over at the mountain on my bed but a smile creeps across my face thinking about Sunday night. I sigh dramatically and move my laptop to the side. Four days have passed since our date and I'm miserably sick but happy whenever I think of how I got like that.

I kissed Jaylan.

I, Elizabeth Maria Lucero, kissed Jaylan Parker.

Jaylan kissed me.

Jaylan and I kissed.

Jaylan and I kissed in the rain.

We kissed in the car, for a while to warm up from the freezing rain. His car has heated seats, by the way, but his hands made up for the parts of me I wasn't sitting on.

We kissed at every red light... That was my fault. The lights were long, give me a break.

We kissed in front of the door, before Maxine swung it open.

His lips are everything I've dreamt of. They're so soft, so full, so luscious, and delicious. He uses pineapple chapstick. It tastes good.

He was my first kiss, besides Conor for practicing. But he gave me so many, I'm catching up.

He pulled my lip like Juan from Amor en la Calle 33 or like a crazed maniac in love... Well, we've just started talking so there is none of that.

Mostly, he was so soft, gentle, kind, and light.

He gave me an eskimo kiss and the butterflies in my tummy gathered close together in delight.

He palmed my conga drum like he didn't want to go. I think he's started to become obsessed with it like Lexi and Maxine. I believe in spanking only when you're naughty, not for fun but I like when Jaylan does it playfully.

I sink my teeth in but a sneeze erupts, irritating my dry throat and making me sniffle. I pull a tissue near my nose again, with a smile.

I'm glad I had all that practice on my arm and on Conor.

Jaylan didn't really say the magical things I hoped for, like when I was supposed to kiss Wilmer Vanderrama for the first time, but the moment was just so perfect in every way.

The rain made his beard so fluffy and his eyes turned into that dark, forbidden syrup I like.

Is it bad that I want more?

I mean, considering the circumstances, I can't but I want more.

I'm talking about the more aggressive stuff ... Okay, maybe not Maxine-level extreme but like kissing good morning, kissing goodbye, kissing just to kiss you now.

I sigh, looking at the mountain of tissues because I won't live to ever kiss him again. Sadly, now I have fifteen minutes left.

I've been sick for almost three days now and let's just say it doesn't stop me from going to school or celebrating each day. 

I even facetimed into class yesterday because I told Professor Khan I could possibly die but she assured me the kissing disease is only a 72-hour bug and I just need rest. That didn't stop me from taking my exam and I got a ninety-two... again.  It's those stupid 'Select all apply' questions that stump me. If you are a nursing student, you'll understand.

Jaylan, on the other hand, thinks me being sick is the funniest thing in the world.  For some reason, my raspy voice sounds like an angry baby duck. I told him I'm never kissing him again but he just laughs more because he said that was highly unlikely and don't threaten him with a good time. He lost a sticker for that but he's literally at eighteen now.

My fever just broke today, no more runny nose... Well, sorta and my lymph nodes are now..... the size of a pea like they're supposed to be.

I put my hands down from my neck and pick up Olivia, my octopus. She is going have to go with no toys or attention for two nights, since Jaylan is going to Penn State tomorrow.

I miss seeing his face in person. I don't think facetime does justice, even though he's ten minutes away.

Even though Jaylan elevates my blood pressure, he has been so, so sweet. He got me Caldo de Pollo from my job on National Homemade Soup Day. He even picked up my assignments and clinical bag for school so I could practice for the mock code blue for our final check off before spring break. He even reminded me of Make a Friend Day yesterday and I ended up giving him his certificate. I completely forgot about when we were kissing in the car for an hour.

I haven't gotten to tell Lexi and Maxine about the kissing because this whole time my voice has been gone since Tuesday morning. Unless I use hand gestures or written notes, I can't even get after Maxine for her shenanigans. I was actually planning to tell her on Galentine's Day, with confetti poppers announcing I've finally been kissed. I hope I get better before Valentine's Day, this would be my first year to celebrate it with someone and of course the one person I wouldn't mind celebrating with gave me the kissing bug.  

I press my palm on my cheek to calm my uncontrollable grin, thinking about how Jaylan and I eyes flickered at each other. How is lips felt so goo-

"Lizzie, how are you feeling?" Lexi comes in, unafraid of my death sentence.

I cross my hands into an 'x' and she rolls her eyes at me. Flopping right on my bed, she sits near the mountain of tissues, which fly through the air.

"Alexis Lanise," my voice strains and she grins, looking at me. Her smile fades a bit, making me touch her wrist.  I know that face.

"What, Donald Duck?" she teases, touching my red nose.

"I'm not Donald Duck," I say, as she holds up her phone, recording me.

"Lexi," I whine and she cackles. She sighs happily, laying back on my pillow and grabbing Conor.

"How was your day at sch...ool," I struggle to get out. Lexi giggles again and I huff.

"It was okay... just a lot coming up because of spring break,"  she admits.

I agree with heavy shoulders. Nursing school sure doesn't care that I'm sick. "Tell me about it, I have three papers and a group project," I stress and Lexi roars with giggles.

I'm not sure why everyone thinks my sickness is funny right now. I furrow my eyebrows and Lexi touches my cheek.

"I know, my professor is even talking about our final project." She sighs sadly.

"Don't," I frown and she flicks her eyes up at me "I'm sorry. I just, well... It's coming up and a lot is going on. I just got my acceptance letter in the mail today for Southwest and Emirates flight attendant academy," she ends softly

"What Lexi, you should be jumping up and down for joy." I playfully hit her and she sinks her teeth in her lip.

"I mean I want to but I'm worried about Stephen." The harsh reality of post-college fallout again hits me like a ton of bricks.

"Don't make any rash decisions now Lexi." I touch her arm.

"I know I know. It's just, I... Well, I want to be a flight attendant," she confesses softly, like it was finally true coming out of her lips.

"It's not a bad thing Lexi... This is what you want," I remind her gently.

"But what about Stephen," she says sorrowfully into Conor's belly.

"If Stephen really likes you, he will understand," I soothe, although I know it's not easy. Her dream job would mean a long distance relationship.

"But he is also has big dreams too," she says hopelessly.

I see where she is coming from. She was so caught up during our college years with Derek and his dreams, she forgot hers. So when they broke up sophomore year, she really invested in herself, getting her grades up, taking short mini trips with the journalism team for sports events. She grew happier, being able to travel like her heart desires to just go.

Finding herself helped her meet Stephen finding her. I don't think it happened by accident. Stephen came at the right time, just when Derek started engaging in her life again after the Maryland Football team won the championships. He is getting drafted this April and wants Lexi's support. I don't think it was very kind of him to use her like a trophy.

"Lexi, I see what you are saying. I do but enjoy the moment. You deserve Stephen you know this," I say seriously but she cracks a smile trying not to laugh at my voice.

"He is everything I've wanted in a man, honest, sensitive, he listens, caring, good in bed... I mean good at cuddling... and just a good man. He makes me feel good but sometimes I feel like I don't make him feel the same way." She sighs dreamily but with a hint of sadness.

"Are you crazy," I say and she cackles, sinking her teeth in her lip.

"It's just thoughts I have," she sheepishly says, although I know she's speaking from past bad experiences. She's done so well moving forwards herself, but her relationship doubts linger.

"Stephen is crazy about you Lexi, the roses, the notes, the fun dates, the-" I begin to cough a bit and Lexi cracks up, patting my leg.

I furrow my eyebrows because this is a serious moment, and she quiets down. "I'm sorry but you're right."

"Then think of those things," I say, tilting my hand to the side with a poked out lip.

"I want to but I also want to be realistic," she says softly and averts her eyes.

We both are pretty realistic. Even if we don't know the details of where we will go after graduation, we know that it's coming. This is one reason Lexi celebrates my days so eagerly. She's making the most of the time we have left together.

"Don't torture yourself about it Lexi." I place my hand on her arm but she jumps I guess because it is cold.

"I know but it's just right around the corner and it's always going to be in the back of my mind." She twists her lips.

"I know," I softly say.

"I just wish this month would slow down. Stephen is going to be gone the whole month of March and half of April, so May..." She frets a bit.

"Lexi, one day at a time," I assure her and she sighs in distress.

"I wish it was that easy." She covers her face with her hands, dragging them down.

"I know what you mean now," I say, thinking about how quiet it will be without Jaylan giving me a stroke with all his unplanned nonsense. While I never planned to meet anyone seriously, I really like him. He awakens all these new feelings inside me.

"Have you thought about what's next... I mean..."She tosses the open-ended question with a grin. I cover my face and Lexi giggles uncontrollably. She pulls them down as she sees my blushing face.

"Sooooooo," she begins, lifting her eyebrows a few times.

"So what."

"So what do you think about him after Sunday? I mean come on the flowers, the clinical bagggg, the soup...Olivia." She waves at my octopus... well, our octopus, but he gets to see her weekends with supervised visits and weekend trips twice a month. And he's spending March Madness with her all month.

I cover my mouth and she tickles my tummy. I smack her hand, but she just presses, "Soooo what do you think?" She sinks her teeth in her lower lip.

"I mean, it's harmless... I mean, I like holding hands and the kis-" I stop myself but it's too late. Lexi's eyes get so big, I worry they are going to pop out of her head.

"YOU STINKER! YOU KISSED!" She shouts, shaking me a bit. "Oh my God, you had your first kiss... Oh my God!" She rushes off the bed and out of my room.

I arch my brow and crawl out my bed with a tissue in my hand and slip my feet into my black and white cow slippers. I walk to my door and down the hall, hearing her mumble, 'where is it' or something. She pops out of her room with a rainbow confetti popper, which I told her is only for -

"Congratulations!" Lexi says, popping rainbow confetti in my face. I couldn't help but giggle as she squeals in excitement but then pauses. "Is this why you are sick?"

I nod and she coos at me, hugging me and getting more germs on her. "You have the kissing bug?"

I crinkle my nose and she giggles, clasping my hand as we walk to the living room plopping on the sofa. Wow, this is the first time I've been out of my room since Monday evening. Lexi's really done up this place without me for Valentines Day. I think she cleaned out Target's seasonal red and pink decorations.

"Sooooo how was it?" Lexi giddy holds my arm. My face feels warm, maybe because I'm spiking a fever again.

"I don't know," I sheepishly say and Lexi giggles in my cheek.

"Tellllll me! Come on, plus your voice is coming back now so you have to talk," she begs.

I twist my lips trying to hold back my smile. "I like it." I scrunch up my nose to say and Lexi giggles.

"What was it like?" Her eyes sparkle and I sheepishly shrug my shoulders in excitement. "It happened all so fast."

"Like how," she drags with a poked lip.

"Just umm... Well, he was being a brat not giving me the kazoo. We were running in the rain but soaking wet and then we kissed," I say cutely at the end, crinkling my nose.

"Was he a good kisser?" She teases, deepening her voice with squinted eyes.

I giggle and she does too. "He is better than my arm," I answer truthfully, making her laugh into my neck.

"Was it soft, slow, rough, gentle... fast..." Lexi asks, looking so intrigued that she's making me smile too hard.

Before I answer, the front door opens with Maxine seductively pulling in Marcus. Her hands clutch around his shirt at his chest. He leans forward, saying something into her ear that makes her smile, then she hits him in the chest.

"I really don't like entering the house with those words," Maxine stresses, coming in with Marcus behind her with a big grin.

"Maxine, Lizzie has her voice back and we have something exciting to tell you," Lexi teases and I gasp at her. Marcus continues to grin at all three of us. Maxine arches her brow and looks back at Marcus.

"Marcus, I'll be in a sec." She waves him off to her room.

"You might want to stay here," I inform him because I'm probably going to have to do CPR.

"Think I know what this is about." He grins widely and sits in our extra living room chair. "Unless y'all ate all of my bacon again."

"Like you won't buy more." Maxine scoffs at Marcus but arches her brow at me.

Lexi pats the side of the sofa next to her. Good choice.

"What is this soft, rough, slow?" Max hums and Lexi and I both sink our teeth in our lower lips. Marcus laughs and Maxine grunts, pointing to her room, but he just leans back in our chair in a cool way.

"I wanted to tell you over dinner on Galentines Day," I honestly did. I had a whole speech written out for this. I put up my hands and Maxine's eyes grow bigger than her long Amazon legs.

"I kissed Jaylan," I squeak. Marcus lets out a chuckle as Lexi squeals again in excitement while Maxine holds her chest but couldn't help but smile - wait, what?

"You diddddd?" she says, standing up and coming over to me, I don't know if this fever is making me have hallucinations or I'm about to die... Actually, it's about time I die now.

"Lizzieeeee," she coos at me in a sweet, scary way. "Beat it Marcus." She scolds him, pointing to her room.

He throws up his hands while the two hug to me happily. They are going to die because of the kissing bug. I'm patient zero.

"So, you never answered, was it soft?" Lexi pulls back, tugging my arm.

"Pfft, Jaylan doesn't know what soft means." Maxine rolls her eyes but tugs my other arm too.

"He was soft with me and he pulled my lip. I had a bruise," I answer. Truthfully, the bite actually kind of hurt but I kind of liked it. It was like he tasted me.

Lexi and Maxine crackle as I pull my lip out. Marcus is grinning so wide right now, I wonder what he's thinking. "What elseeee?"

"Well, I couldn't reach his lips, so he picked me up and grabbed my conga drum," I say quietly.

"Your conga drum," Lexi cackles.

"It's pretty big," Maxine wiggles her eyebrows.

"He bragged about that part, 'cause it is big," Marcus mumbles, then shrugs when we all look at him. "What? Guys talk shit too."

"Quit!" I furrow my brows and struggle for the right words. "It was really... I don't know. Nice?"

"Ahhh, I remember my first kiss," Maxine smiles, fluttering her eyelashes. "Eighth grade, so much spit."

"Me too," Lexi sighs as we sit back down on the sofa. "Mine was soft and sweet, like we held our lips there and didn't know what else to do."

"I smacked my forehead the first time," Marcus confesses with a laugh.

"Marcus this is an A B conversation C your way to my room." Maxine slants her eyes and I tap her arm to be polite.

"Did it give you the kissing bug?" I ask honestly and everyone roars with laughter but I'm so serious. I furrow my eyebrows and they push in to squish me.

"So, it wasn't the jacket after all?" Maxine gasps because she was so scared that her myth was wrong.

"No, it still is." I giggle, laying back with a tissue in my hand.

"So, what does this mean?" Lexi asks.

I fall silent because, honestly, I don't know what it means. I mean we hold hands, flirt, and share serious conversations. The more he opens up, the more I like Jaylan. But I don't expect him to just drop everything and ask me to be his girlfriend. I mean, I've always wanted to be somebody's girlfriend... or wife but I just don't think Jaylan's anywhere near that headspace.

At least, I don't think so.

"I like him but I d-"

"Lizzie, the guy is blue balls over you, trust me," Maxine's vulgar truth doesn't entirely reassure me. "He likes you."

"Don't overthink.... Just enjoy the moment." Lexi pats my leg.

"Plus, I'll kick his ass if he does something stupid," Marcus grins.

Our attention averts to Marcus, who I forgot was here, and Maxine grunts. "Be nice," I tell her and she huffs.

"You are lucky that Lizzie likes you. Otherwise I wou-"

"Maxine, you have two stars left," I remind her and she clenches her jaw. Marcus laughs.

She slants her eyes at him. "Marcus, you are jeopardizing my chances to see Fifty Shades of Grey."

Marcus throws his head back and cackles. "Y'all so fucking wild."

We all gasp at his choice of words and Maxine pokes out her lip to correct him but I shake my head no.

"Marcus!" She pouts.

"You act like you never seen it," he teases and she gasps. Lexi shakes her head at their nonsense.

"Well, congratulations Lizzie on getting to the other side," he teases and I furrow my eyebrows, which only makes him cackle.

Maxine, however, sits up straight and shakes her head. "Oh no, she is not going on that side."

And what side is that?

"Oh, Doc McStuffins..." Jaylan's voice sings through our home.

I gasp and quickly stand, almost slipping with my cow slippers to the call box. I glance at the echo show and furrow my eyebrows. He knows he's supposed to pick up Olivia at nine o' clock.

"Jaylan, it's nine thirty, go home," I order.

"Who is this? Where is that beautiful woman I kis-"

I cut him off and everyone laughs. I could hear Jaylan too. "Go home!" I strain my voice.

"I'm picking up Marcus and Olivia," he teases.

"No, you're not," Maxine scolds, probably because she is going to miss his cuddles while he's away but she won't admit it.

"Yes I ammmmm, we leave at six am tomorrow," he sings.

"Jaylan, stop teasing everyone, or you won't get a sticker," I threaten and he laughs through the speaker.

He cackles louder through the speaker and I huff and walk over to the balcony's sliding glass door. The night air hits me as I walk out in my furry cow jumping over the moon robe, my hair damp from my lavender bubble bath, and finally clear but severely inflamed sinuses, to see him standing like a tall glass of horchata. His big arms are bulging out of his sweatshirt and his joggers are glued to his muscular legs. He's grinning widely and my mouth begins to water from the memory of kissing those full, juicy-

"Hi," Jaylan says, grabbing his hands at the bottom of the balcony and lifting himself on the banister, also in a cool way. His elbows wrap over the railing like he just hasn't scaled up the outside like Spiderman.

"Jaylan! You could hurt yourself," I pull him up and he laughs, waving it off like it was nothing. He pulls me close to him and lifts up my hands to kiss them softly, like he's done no wrong.

It's working.

My skin tingles wherever his lips softly press and my butterflies are coming out of quarantine.

"You're going to get sick," I say softly.

"Nice robe, you have clothes on underneath?" He smirks, growing two horns on the side of his head the longer he looks down.

"I'm not naked!" I defend and he arch his brow scanning eyes up and down my robe. I have a tank top and shorts on. Sure, with my bare legs sticking out from the robe, it looks like I have no clothes on but I'm modest compared to Lexi. She goes full on topless, airing out her mangoes when no one is home.

"Deja de ser travieso (quit being naughty)," I mumble.

"What? Take it off, Doc McStuffins but we are just friends?" he teases and my mouth gapes open at how open he is!

"Jaylaaaan," I drag out.

"Lizzieeee," he tosses back, giving me a wide grin.

I grumble with a smile on my face and he pushes a few strands of my hair out of my face. The way his voice softens magnifies the flipping sensation my heart is doing. "I missed you, Doc McStuffins."

He missed me?

But he barely knows me.

I soften my brows at him as he pushes up my glasses to be funny. I furrow my eyebrows and he kisses them so softly, relaxing my internal eye twitch of him being so careless as he dangles off our balcony.

He puts a finger under my chin, making me look at him. The cold air warms around us, our bodies pressing together. The backdrop of stars in the winter night sky makes it extra romantic, reminding me of when Troy sneaks to see Gabrielle but we haven't crossed that line yet.

"I haven't seen or bothered you since Sunday." His words come out like a warm cupcake. I lean forward and giggle into his chest. His heart is beating a normal sinus rhythm, synchronized to one.

"You really missed me?" I pull back and he nods his head in such a cute way, with a poked out lip.

He missed me?

Like missed me like how I miss home?

Silence fills around us but snickering by the patio door makes me shift my head, only to see the blinds moving. I look back up at Jaylan and he is smiling down at me.  "I missed you too, but I'm going to die soon," I say sadly and he cackles softly.

"Guess I'll give you my last right's kiss, hmm?" He hums, making me sink my teeth in.

I mean after all... Never mind, I won't go into microbiology.

His lips press against mine in an instant. With just one contact and taste of pineapple chapstick, he reminds of why we kissed so many times.

I whimper, making him laugh because he knows I'm weird about germs. One of his hands cups around the back of my head and he sucks gently on my lower lip, making my eyes flutter open. I flicker my eyes up, meeting his gaze and he smirks.

"Happy Shut in Visitation Day," he says, reaching for a handmade basket of goodies I hadn't realized he's carrying. I was supposed to do that with my favorite elderly friends at Loren Nursing Home but I didn't want to get them sick.

Last year, I taught everyone how to salsa dance and, let me tell you, old people can get down.

Oh, I miss Mr. Jack and Ms. Tracy.

"Jaylan," I say, admiring all the little cute things he's thoughtfully brought me.

"Sticker thing is easy." He laughs, holding up one finger and knowing he only has one more left to twenty.

I grunt and he laughs, kissing my cheek.

"I would have come down to let you in." I poke his chest

"This way is more fun, now that my ankle feels better." He grins widely, the moonlight highlighting his handsome features. "And don't act like a balcony kiss isn't something you wanted to doooo," he teases.

He is right but he doesn't need to know that! I have a lot of places where I want to kiss. On top of the roof, at the beach, kiss, my list is endless on Pinterest.

I shake my head in disapproval and he kisses my red nose, which I wrinkle up right away. "Germs!"

"Come on, let's go look in your basket. And I have to pack stuff for Olivia," he tease, ignoring my strained voice.

I grunt and he climbs over the railing, opening the sliding glass door, where Marcus, Maxine, now Stephen, and Lexi jump back from getting caught watching us. Lexi coos leaning into Stephen as if I'm some kind of teenager with their first boyfriend, where Maxine tries to hide her hopeless romantic sap heart with an arched brow. I furrow my eyebrows when Marcus and Stephen slap hands with Jaylan, and take his hand back to my room.

"Leave the door open... Ouch, Marcus stop it," Maxine grumbles at the end, hearing a smack to her conga drum and her door closing.

We walk in my room and Jaylan shuts my door. Even closed, we hear Maxine's grumbles about secret cameras. He laughs, shaking his head.

"What's in hereee," I say, smiling and hopping on my bed. I make a trail through the tissues and move them so Jaylan could sit on my bed.  I immediately hold a rainbow striped balloon that says Get Well Soon. I twirl the balloon in my hands as the shine of it highlights my face, and turn to mention about Balloon Day as he plugs in my twinkle lights and turns off my lights.

Oh no, I'm going to be sleepy soon.

I let out yawn and he chuckles as he looks around my room, walking through my mountains of tissue. Of course, he finds my light blue bra and his horns on his head grow bigger, with an added pitch fork. He surprisingly and politely puts it in my laundry basket.

Why is he being like this? He really wants this sleepover. Jaylan flops on my bed, making me bounce up high and he laughs.

"Jaylan you're going to break my bed," I fret as it dips under his weight.

He cackles, reaches his long arms to me, and pulls me close to him. "I missed you, Doc McStuffins," he says again.

The second time, it sounds even better.

I sink my teeth in my lower lip as he keeps staring at me, tracing his finger on my knee. "I missed you too," I say softly. I keep looking in the basket and he has so many things in here. Look at it... Sleepy Time tea, cough drops...the cherry kind.

I poke my lip out, holding the bag up, and he touches my cheek playfully. I gasp, pulling out the baby blue fuzzy socks I wanted at Target but they didn't have my size.

"Who is helping you!" I say and he purses his lips like he is not going to tell his secret.

"What's this?" I hold up a book that says Sudoku.

"Something to keep that little nurse brain focused."

I arch my eyebrow and he smiles. "Sudoku?"

He adjusts himself sitting at the head of my bed and pats in the middle of his legs.

I narrow my eyes at him. "Jayan, do you not care about getting sick?"

"Elizabeth," he sternly says, patting again, and I giggle, crawling up to him.

Our bodies radiate off heat but I think it's just my fever to make up for it. His long legs bracket mine as he leans back on my headboard, pulling me back on his chest. 

"It's numbers," I fret as I look at the nine boxed puzzle.

His chest vibrates into my back as he chuckles. "I'm helping you enjoy math."

Not a chance.

I lean back and gently tap the book on his forehead. "I don't know if that's even possible."

"Anything possible, Doc McStuffins." He brings his hands to his thighs, where his fingers brush over my bare knees.

My eyes cross as they search through the first puzzle. "How does it even work?"

"We'll do it together." He pulls out a pencil and I furrow my eyebrows. He laughs into the side of my neck, making heat radiate down it and into my shoulder.

"Okay." I glanced over my shoulder, flicking my eyes up at him and he smiles softly.

"Is this your cruel way of knowing math," I say and he chuckles.

"Somewhat," he admits and wraps his arm around me as he aims the pencil at the open page.

I nod softly as he puts a date of today on the top, with a crooked heart.

"It helps me think," he says softly, adding the number one to one of the boxes. "You put in numbers one through nine, one each in every row and column."

"Think about what," I softly say, taking the aquarium pencil we were supposed to give to Jordy.  He laughs in my neck again, pecking it with a soft kiss and making my butterflies in my tummy run around, screaming their heads off.

"How to handle life, put the two there" He points next to a number eight that's already way

"In what way?" I hand it back to him.

"It takes time to understand that like numbers, in life you just place some things at the right place at the right time and then everything else will fall at its right place," he whispers in my ear and writes a three. I turn to look at him, where his eyes look like that light brown mixed with honey. I kiss the tip of his nose and turn back, leaning back into him.

"Who got you doing Sudoku?" I ask, watching him at work for a few numbers then hands me back the pencil.

"Uncle Steve." He taps the number five and I follow his instruction. I smile, thinking how Jaylan probably pestered his Uncle into teaching him how to do it.

"Was it for punishment?" I tease.

He sighs lightly and kisses the top of my head. His silence makes me pause my pencil because I've learned Jaylan falling quiet means it's a serious issue, so I turn and look up at him. His eyes are glossed over like he's recalling a memory, and not a happy one the way the corners of his mouth turn down.

"No, it helps me find the right places in myself that I didn't see, and the holes I'm still trying to see," he admits.

Knowing Jaylan thus far, he has shown me his heart yearns for family, just like myself. He's more openly discussing his mom, recalling memories, and asks me a lot about mine. I can see he's very family-centered. He longs for the warm connection that family brings. He desires it but he just doesn't know how to express it.

"What are you still trying to see?" I ask softly.

He pauses, for a long time, his eyes studying mine. Right before I assure him he doesn't have to answer, he does, "Who I am."

I set the puzzle down in my lap and touch his face softly ."You know what I see?"

"My eight abs?" He grins widely. "My careless acts?"

I let a soft snicker and shake my head, although I definitely see those too. "I see how family oriented you are."

He laughs as if it was a joke. Picking up the puzzle again, he puts a seven next to the two I wrote.

"You think so?" He clears his throat and I nod. He touches our hands together, wrapping his over mine and writing a three.

"Well, yeah...When you explained about your tattoos, everything is related about your family. It's your heart and they are the center of all the decisions you make," I shyly end. "That's... what I see."

Jaylan lets out a deep sigh and kisses me softly on my cheek. When he presses his face up against mine, it feels a little damp. I turn around to see his eyes so light brown, they reflect my eyes like a mirror.

"You never stop to amaze me, Elizabeth Lucero." He flickers his eyes back and forth between each of mine. He stroked his thumb on my cheek, squishing it slightly. Under the warm, intense look in his eyes, I look down shyly and he tilts my chin back up.

I slowly turn back to the puzzle because the butterflies are doing a backflip on the trampoline they just bought. My eyes marvel as he continues to write in the last number of the box.

"Lizzie..." He clears his throat when I close the puzzle. An unusual uncertainty fills his voice, reflecting in the soft way he looks at me. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah." I set the puzzle and pencil on the floor, turning and giving him full attention.

"Would it be okay if I stay here tonight?"

In any other context, he might have sounded suggestive but the emotion in his eyes shows the reason he's asking is he doesn't want to be alone. He doesn't say it but I get the feeling he doesn't ask this often, if ever.

I place one hand on his cheek. "Of course."

Edited and spiced up by @still_just_me