Yamada-sensei's POV

It was around 10:00 PM, I already took dinner that I materialized in the rooftops alone, and I made a portal back to my mansion.

"Hey, is anybody there?" I said through the door.

"Coming!" Astel said.

He then unlocked the door immediately.

"Ey, he back!"

He did a man hug.

I looked at the others.

The girls, and boys are there. All of my kids are sleeping, but some of them are being breastfed by their moms. Especially Rushia and the ex-flat chested girls.

I yawned.

"Hey guys."

They nodded.

I looked at my kids.

"Ah, I miss their faces." I giggled.

I sat down on the couch, and Mel and the others made way, while making sure not to wake up their kid.

Couch:

Yamada--Mel--Sora--Towa

I sighed in relief as I sat down.

"I miss you all so much. Despite being experienced, this was kinda new to me." I said.

"Bro, you need dinner or something?" Roberu asked.

"No, I just wanna relax on the couch for a while."

"How was it on young Yamada's universe?" Sora asked.

"Nothing bad so far. Only thing that made me worry was Mr. Weeaboo's plan to get more recruits, but I don't know what he's needing them for just yet."

"If you want, we can take your position. You're probably tired from all the streaming, monitoring, and all that." Rikka said.

"No, I can handle it."

I then leaned forward.

"Well, I'm guessing you all waited for me to come home?"

They nodded.

I noticed that the others are streaming. I can hear it.

"Something interesting happened to young Yamada's relationship with Kiara."

"What is it?" Roberu asked.

"He's a 'relationship counselor.'"

They laughed silently.

"So basically, every little problem young Kiara's gonna have with young Calli, he's gonna be her 'emergency kit' when she doesn't know what to do. Poor Yamada. Well, men do go through that process."

We all laughed silently again.

I stood up.

"Welp, let's get going, shall we?"

They nodded.

I made portals, and everybody went to their rooms.

I then made one to mine, and lied on my bed.

I sighed.

"...I need to take a shower."

I then took my clothes off, and showered.

"Another relaxing shower."

I then thought about Mr. Weeaboo's plans.

The info I gathered right now is 1: Mr. Weeaboo is gonna get more recruits, and 2: 2 guys clawed a few cars for whatever reason, which might be connected to Mr. Weeaboo.

For now, I need to retain these.

I then finished, put on a boxer, and lied on my bed.

"*sigh* Mr. Weeaboo..."

I need to teach young Yamada more techniques, before this happens. One is that he needs to learn how to materialize without Aki's eyes. 2nd is copying Kiara's eyes.

I then slept.

Sept 10, 2020 7:30 AM

Yamada's POV

I woke up from Pekora's BGM.

I stopped it.

I waited for a bit.

"Okay, time to get up."

I sat up, got my lenses on, and checked my phone.

I checked twitter.

"Oh? Schedule?"

I checked twitter.

I have an event on Sept 12 4:00 PM, where I get to do Smash Ultimate with Aqua, and Marine.

I grinned so hard.

My toxic side started kicking in.

"Oh? They think they can beat me just cause I main Cloud? *fake spit* Disgusting. I'll let you know I was one of the best players of Smash 4! NERDS!"

I started imagining I was battling against them.

I blew on my right shoulder, and swiped it.

"Not a challenge. Ew, don't touch me, noobs."

I laughed.

"Oh man, I'm looking forward to my serotonin levels peaking as I hear them cry on their knees."

I'm especially looking forward to beating Marine and Aqua. I'LL BE THE MOST TOXIC PLAYER IN HOLOLIVE, JUST YOU WAIT, YOU FUCKING ONION AND HORNY BOOMER! MUAHAHAHAHA!

I went down, took breakfast, and showered.

"*humming* Should I humiliate them? Or tease them? I wonder..."

I imagined bullying them, cause that's me. As a Filipino, it's essential to know how to trashtalk.

Man, just seeing their face getting flustered, and their crying, makes me feel like a king.

And yes, I'm still in toxic mode right now.

Lemme come up with some lines to really get on their nerves.

For Aqua: "HUH?! IS THIS WHY YOU'RE CALLED BAQUA?! YOUR BRAIN IS THAT DEFECTIVE?! WELL, OF COURSE!

For Marine: "I THOUGHT YOU'RE GOOD AT TRASHTALKING?! IT SEEMS YOU'RE ONLY GOOD AT BEING TRASH!"

For Aqua: "GAMER MAID? MY LEFT NIPPLE! THIS IS WHY YOUR BRAIN IS AN ONION!"

For Marine: "PEKORA PLAYS BETTER THAN YOU, AND SHE DOESN'T EVEN USE A BROKEN ELECTRIC RAT WITH 2 RED CIRCLES!"

For Aqua: "ONION-HEAD!"

For Marine: "EVEN MY LITTLE MAGE SIBLINGS PLAY BETTER THAN YOU, AND THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO PLAY SMASH!"

For Aqua: "THIS IS WHY YOU MAIN CLOUD! CAUSE I ALWAYS SEND YOU UP TO THE SKY!"

For Marine: "THIS IS WHY YOU USE PIKACHU, CAUSE YOU ALWAYS KISS MY ASS!"

I laughed at the insults.

"I'm ready for the toxicity that's about to unfold."

Aqua, Marine, it's just for the sake of entertainment, no hard feelings...okay?~♥

I finished taking a shower, went to my bedroom, and I checked the subreddit. I saw HoloEN a.k.a HoloMyth's thread. It's about their debut. It'll start from September 12 8 PM, and shall end at September 13 8 AM. They'll also have a collab on 10 AM...Well, I don't know about you, but I think I'm gonna stay up for their streams...unless I fall asleep in the middle of their streams.

Oh yeah, nobody knows that I can get toxic. I didn't become toxic when I played Dota with OkaKoro, and I didn't become toxic when I was streaming Smash, but I did show that I was a Cloud main. The day when the HoloEN will debut, is the time I show everybody that I'm a toxic MF.

Well, let's see what the community will think when I show just how much I'll enjoy this "friendly match" of Smash.

I then thought that I could try to play against my madoshis on 11:00 AM.

"Hmm...good idea."

I mean, ever seen Miko getting bullied by 35P? That just shows that there are good players in Smash, so this'll be nice.

I then tweeted that exact thing, and I leaned back on my chair afterwards.

"I'd like to sleep, but...."

I don't need to sleep if I already got 8 hours of sleep.

"Well...I guess I'll just scroll on the subreddit, and watch some Hololive clips."

Time to look at some clips, and memes. And also some Filthy Frank while I'm at it.

After some scrolling, I realized...

"...I forgot to give Noel a gift?"

Well, fuck. I'm late, and I think Yamada-sensei needs some rest.

"Well, I guess I'll go make it myself then."

I stood up, and sat in front of my study desk. I also activated Aki's eyes.

"So...let's visualize it."

I started with an iron ring. For the gem, it'll be a white agate. Yes, I did some research with Yamada-sensei about gemstones.

After that, I thought as to what I want the ring to do.

I want the ring to decrease the needed LF to increase her strength by 1.

Now, the enchanting part comes in. First, I need to tether this to Noel herself.

I need to see Noel in some way so that I can tether this to her.

I made a portal to Noel's room. She was lying on her bed.

"I hate Yamada." She repeatedly chanted.

I sweat dropped.

"Why does she hate me now?"

I tethered the ring to her whole body, including her brain, and closed the portal.

Now, I need to remember what Strength Amplification does. Basically, depending on how strong you want to be, is also how much LF is needed.

I wanted this for her:

Every 30 kgs = -1LF

It doesn't look like a lot, but it helps in the long run.

Now, I just need to put LF, and....booyah!

My LF pool went from 65 to 45.

"Yeesh, that happened."

I then summoned it on my study desk.

"Well, at least I learned how to make this myself without Yamada-sensei's help now."

He would supply me LF once I would do this.

I then activated Kanata's eyes, wore a short and shirt, and made a portal to Noel's room.

"Noel?"

"Uwah!" She jumped, and activated her gift.

"Hey. Hey! It's me!"

"Oh...it's Yamada..."

She pouted, and looked away.

"W-Why're you angry at me?"

I sat beside her.

"Go away!"

She pushed me, and I almost got pushed out of the bed.

"What the-What the fuck is your problem, woman?!" I angrily said.

She then got scared.

She looked away, and I sighed.

I went closer, and held her by the hips.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"...I hate you."

"Why? Why do you hate me?"

"...2 things."

She looked at me in the eyes.

"I heard you're giving gifts to everybody that hit some milestones, but I didn't get mine a few days ago."

She frowned angrily.

"I reached 500k subs, and you didn't give me anything."

I sweat dropped.

"Well, sorry about that. I'm a forgetful, and busy boyfriend, okay?"

"And 2nd..."

"2nd?"

"...You cheated on me..."

"...Huh?"

"You cheated on me...with Flare."

My face then got deformed.

"I'm sorry...I cheated on you with Flare?"

It's not really cheating if she's my GF too, you know?

"I mean...in my dream-"

"Oh, so it was just a dream." I said immediately.

"At least let me finish it!" Noel said.

"C'mon, Noel. Flare's also my girlfriend, there's no way I can cheat if that's the case. Besides, a dream's a dream. Just because I did something to Flare does not mean it happened in reality."

No really, I did not do anything to Flare. I wonder what made her dream that?

Flare's POV

I was actually curious about some lewd pics about me. I don't know why, but I suddenly wanted to look for it, so I did, and I saw one where Yamada fucked me in a bedroom with text saying:

Yamada: "Let's keep this a secret from Noel, alright?"
Flare: "Yes~♥"

I mean, it kinda felt wrong, since this technically serves as NTR, since Yamada isn't officially shipped with everyone, just some little ships here and there.

And here I am, fingering myself to the pic, cause there's just something about this pic that's just...making me horny.

Yamada's POV

"Well, whatever the case, I didn't do anything, and Flare didn't do anything."

Right?

"Well...I don't know, but..."

She looked away.

"I still kinda hate the fact you didn't give me any gift." She pouted.

I took the ring out.

"Give me your hand.

"Why would I-"

She looked at the ring.

I held her hand, and inserted the ring.

"Strength Amplification costs 1 LF less in intervals of 30 kilograms."

She was very happy, and looked at it.

"The girls are getting theirs, right?"

"Soon enough."

"I see..."

She kept looking at the ring.

"I don't know what to say..."

She smiled happily.

"It's so beautiful."

"Like you."

She blushed.

"Though...am I really gonna have to take this after I did those things to you?" She asked.

"As long as you learn your lesson, you're fine. Just don't try to push me all of a sudden."

She then hugged my left arm.

"I'm sorry."

Woah, that was a straightforward apology, no beat-around-the-bush apology. Nice.

"You're forgiven."

We giggled, and I kissed her forehead.

"Well, I'm going back now." I stood up.

"You don't need anything?"

"Just wanted to stop by. Bye, Noel."

"W-Wait-"

Noel's POV

He then went back to his room, and I pouted.

I put my head in my pillow, and threw a tantrum.

"I HATE YAMADA!!!" 

"THAT IDIOT DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER TO SEND ME A LITTLE ' I LOVE YOU' OR SOMETHING?!"

I lied on my back.

"Ugh, men."

I pouted even more.

Yamada's POV

I then sat in front of my chair, and I continued looking at the subreddit, Twitter, and Youtube.

"Hmm...oh?"

Oga also reached 30k subs.

"Well, gotta make something for me bro."

I am gonna need to know Oga's location. I got a method in mind though.

I went to discord, and I DM'd him.

"Hey, Oga, sorry if you're busy, but can you please take a quick picture of the corner of your room? Make sure it's big enough that it can picture 1 whole person there. Thanks in advance!"

I started imagining the ring

I thought of a silver ring. The gemstone shall be Black Garnet.

This time, the ring is for a man, so it's kinda thick.

The ring shall decrease the needed evil energy by 5. His gift is interesting. His evil energy can be as infinite as much as he wants, but even 1 LF will cost a lot of evil energy, so this is gonna help him in the long run.

If I remember correctly, it's 1 LF : 15 Evil energy. So now, it's gonna be 1 LF : 10 Evil energy.

I then retained that memory, cause I need to see the pic.

He sent me a pic, and I then made a portal to that.

I went into his room, and I looked back.

"Oga?"

He wore a white undershirt, and black shorts

"Oh, Yamada!"

He stood up.

"Sorry about the clothing. I didn't know what you were gonna do when you asked me that. Now, I know."

"Well, I'm just here to do a little something 2x that you'll like."

He raised his eyebrows.

"Anyway, can I sit in front of your computer for a bit? It's gonna be quick, I promise."

I then took a quick look at him, and tethered that to him.

After that, I made the ring.

My LF is now 28.

I started sweating a bit.

I activated Kanata's eyes.

"Here."

He widened his eyes.

"For me?"

I nodded.

I stood up, and he put the ring on.

"Yo, this looks sick! What does this do?"

"1 LF : 10 Evil energy. It helps a lot, doesn't it?"

"Really?! You're the best bro ever!"

He hugged me tight.

"OF COURSE! THE GIRLS ARE JUST STAGE 1 HOLOSTARS HUGGING POWER! FUCK THIS SUFFOCATING SHIT! WRYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!"

I manned up, and I hugged back.

"YEAH! GIVE ME MORE! I FEEL LIKE A KING! I CAN TAKE ON EVERYBODY ELSE THAT'S GONNA SUFFOCATE ME IN A HUG, YEAH!"

After 5 seconds, I noticed his arms kinda drooped down.

"Huh?"

I took a look at him, and he passed out.

"OGAAAAAAAAAA!"

GODDAMN! I WAS TOO MUCH OF A KING.

I set him down on the bed, and healed him with some of my LF.

He then woke up.

"Jesus, I never knew you were that strong at hugging."

"S-Sorry about that. I always seem to suffocate when people in Hololive hug me." I scratched my head, and giggled nervously.

"Well, I guess that's a mistake in my part."

He looked at the ring.

"Still, why did you give me this?"

"You reached 30k subs, you know?"

"Huh, so you noticed that. I really appreciate it."

He realized something.

"Oh yeah, what about the others?"

"They'll get theirs soon enough."

I made a portal to my room, but I made sure to remember this room again, in case I need to come back.

"Well, I'll be going back, Oga. It was a short while, but I hope you enjoy the gift. Bye!"

He waved back.

I then went through the portal.

I continued scrolling on twitter, and other platforms. While I was listening to Toy - Takayan, I realized I could mix this with God's Plan - Drake.

I checked the time. It's 9:30 AM.

"I can make the instrumental."

I then got my electric guitar and amp, and I tried to find the notes. After that, I opened FL Studio, and started making the beat for it.

It was fun, actually. The chemistry was good, and I tested out singing it. The 808 was especially nice. I love my 808s :3

I saved the project, exported it, and put it into a USB.

I then texted Yagoo that I'll be recording around afternoon to record a song that I wanna make a cover of.

Once it hit 11:00 AM, I started streaming.

I also researched a bit on Cloud's counters. Well, I'm hoping for a good match.

"Ohayou, madoshis! The Mage of Shirazaki Yamada, Hololive, is here!" I clapped 8 times.

"Today, we are going to battle each other! I have tweeted that I will go against you all, and I expect you all to beat the shit out of me."

I did some magic here (cause I'm a mage), and boom! I used Cloud vs Pikachu.

I laughed.

"Oh, you guys did your research on the counters. I also researched on the counters of Cloud, and I expected one of you would pick a counter. I'm hoping for a good match. LET'S GO!"

I then fought against Pikachu.

In the end of the fight, it was a close call for me.

I dropped the controller, and held my face.

"Yo, it's the 1st match. 1ST MATCH! AND I ALMOST LOST!" I laughed.

"Jeez...you guys saw that, right? It was my last stock, and I had 200%, and Pikachu was around 90%. I JUST NEED TO BE HIT WITH A SMASH OR SOMETHING, AND I'M DEAD!"

I cleared my throat.

"You guys are good. That guy actually had world-class skill. I remember your name, bro. I'm coming back for you one day, and I'm gonna wreck your ass again. You're very good." I giggled.

I continued playing against my madoshis. I played like 20 matches, since some of them are casual players, and others actually took quite a lot of time cause they're very good. In the end, I lost to 3 of them, and within the 17 matches, I won 6 of them from luck, and spamming that neutral B. I wish Nair was like Smash 4 though, what the fuck, man? Cloud's Nair from Smash 4 was longer, but now, it's shorter than the smallest dick in the world.

By the way, in the middle of the stream, Amelia chatted on my stream. I was playing Cloud (like usual) against Donkey Kong.

"Ganbare, Yamada-senpai!"

I looked at the chat for a bit.

"Amelia, you can speak English. No need to type in Japanese-OH SHIT!"

I got launched, and I tried to recover.

"Don't worry. I got this in the bag, everybody."

I then got down, and I hit smashed Donkey Kong, and he got launched out.

I then guarded on the ledge, and I neutral B'd.

"See? I got this in the bag, don't worry about it."

He then got launched down, and it was 2-2.

I continued to win this match.

"So anyway, I hope you all enjoyed the show! For the madoshis that I fought against, you're good. For the casual players, you did good too. Give a round of applause to the ones that fought against me." I clapped.

"So! That'll be all for me. I hope you all enjoyed it! I really enjoyed it. It's nice getting to interact with my madoshis."

I prepared to end the stream.

"I'M SEISO AS FUCK, BOIIIIIIIIIIII-"

I ended the stream.

I clapped once.

"Stream done!"

I instantly got a discord DM.

"Hmm?"

It was a friend request from Amelia.

I accpeted it, and we had a short chat. At the same time, I chatted with my squirrel bitch, Risu. (Why do we just love to insult each other?)

Amelia~

Yamada: Hey, what's up?
Amelia: Hey, Yamada-senpai. Just got something to ask. You free right now?

I looked at the time. It's 12:05 PM.

Yamada: Yeah. Why do you ask?
Amelia: Well...can we play chess?

I widened my eyes, and laughed a bit.

"She's challenging me?!"

This is promising! I'm having high hopes on this match!

Yamada: Where?
Amelia: In the small lounge for the staff in the Hololive HQ.
Yamada: I see...want me to make a portal there now?
Amelia: Yes, please. I'd like to play with you, and have some fun.

Somehow, my dirty mind processed that differently. I can now somewhat feel like she emits some sort of horni aura. I feel some sort of seduction coming from this woman, and she does not know it.

Yamada: Well, lemme dress up right now, and I'll go to you. Bye
Yamada: Oh, by the way, we gon' have lunch there?
Amelia: Yeah. Yagoo did order food for us. I asked him permission if we could do this.

"Old Man is okay with this? He's one supportive old man, I'll say that much." I sweat dropped.

Yamada: Got it. I'll see you in a bit, Amelia.
Amelia: Bye, Yamada-senpai.

Risu~

Risu: Hey, dick. I'm bored
Yamada: You're bored? I thought you're "board"
Risu: I have boobs, you know? Want me to pic them, you pervert?
Yamada: Are you horny?
Risu: No, but I bet you are
Yamada: When girls suggest this, they are definitely horny.
Yamada: Besides, you even allowed your fanarts to be NSFW.
Risu: Fine, I'll admit I'm a bit horny

...wait, TF?!

Yamada: What a dirty bitch. That's why you're a bitch
Risu: And that's why you're a dick. Small dick.
Yamada: Bitch, I'm sure you know that I know that you know that I have a big fuckin' dick
Risu: Nope. You're 9 cm tall, and 2-3 cm wide
Yamada: Bitch, it's inches, not cm. What a stupid bitch, bitch
Risu: You don't even understand sarcasm, stupid dick, dick

"Well, doesn't matter, I need to go."

Yamada: I need to go, bitch. You're gonna be the bitch that you are there in Indonesia. Known as the Squirrel bitch.

I then went, and dressed up. I didn't bother to look at her message yet until I either finish the match, or dress up.

I dressed up in blue pants, black shirt, and white and black shoes.

I got my wallet, knife, phone, USB, and handkerchief. I then made a portal to the HQ, and I went to the lounge.

I checked Risu's message before I went there.

Risu: Bye, dick. You're gonna be the dick that you are in Japan. Known as the Mage dick.

I giggled a bit.

I opened the door, and I saw Amelia.

She was...wearing the same outfit as before?

"Wait...Amelia, isn't that your fighting costume?"

"No, there's a difference between this, and my fighting costume."

She pointed to her left eye.

"I don't have a monocle."

"Ooooohhh...I see."

"There's other differences, but that's one of the main differences."

I then sat in front of her.

It was a chess mat, with green and white tiles.

"I see..."

Verza, huh?

I also saw she had a chess clock.

"We're going timed, ey?"

"Wanna do blitz? 5 minutes."

"Sure." I giggled.

She set the timer to 5 minutes.

"I'm not gonna go easy on you, you know?" She said.

"Hoohoo, I like myself a cocky motherfucker." I giggled.

I read her mind. She's actually very good at chess. This'll be a nice battle.

After adjusting the time, we shook hands, and I started the timer.

I was white. She was black.

I'mma just paste the code of the PNG here. Just copy the text down below, go to Chess.com, and then paste this in the analysis board in the "Load PGN" menu.

Also, props to DiaTales29 and KanrishaSenpai for making this little mock battle.

[Event "Casual Rapid game"][Site "https://lichess.org/ZUuRU1Fk"][Date "2020.12.16"][White "Yamada"][Black "Amelia Watson"][Result "0-1"][UTCDate "2020.12.16"][UTCTime "10:01:52"][WhiteElo "?"][BlackElo "1500"][Variant "Standard"][TimeControl "600+5"][ECO "A02"][Opening "Bird Opening: From's Gambit"][Termination "Normal"]1. f4 e5 2. Nh3 Bc5 3. Nc3 exf4 4. Nxf4 Qh4+ 5. g3 Qf6 6. a4 a5 7. d3 Ne7 8. Ra2 O-O 9. h4 Nbc6 10. Bg2 Nd4 11. Rf1 Ra6 12. Be4 c6 13. e3 d5 14. Bxd5 cxd5 15. Ncxd5 Nxd5 16. Nxd5 Qe5 17. b3 Qxd5 18. exd4 Bxd4 19. Ke2 Re6+ 20. Kd2 Qg2+ 21. Rf2 Qxf2+ 22. Qe2 Qxe2# 0-1

After the game, I chuckled.

"You're good." I said.

She looked at me, and smiled.

"I told you I'm not going easy on you."

"I read your mind prior to playing. I didn't know you had the rating of a Grandmaster."

I can beat anybody easily but a GM. A GM would require Ivanchuk's level of thinking, or better, Mikhail Tal's thinking. I can only somewhat think like them. I guess I gotta be more insane in my playing.

"I was going to say that, but you beat me to it." Amelia said.

We laughed.

"You made a mistake in the middlegame." Amelia said.

"I noticed."

I sighed.

"I finally found a reason to study more openings in chess." I said.

"Well, I'm looking forward to the day you will beat me." Amelia said.

Never knew I'd hear that from somebody else, aside from my dad.

"I'm glad you actually beat me, though. I was looking for a challenge in chess." I said.

We tried to shake hands. Tried.

Before we held hands, we felt the floor rumble.

"Earthquake?" Amelia asked herself.

Note: I wrote "Earthquake" on January 21.

"No...This is..."

I could hear distant shouting...from a bunch of girls...I can somewhat predict what's gonna happen.

The double doors opened.

"YAMADA! (YAMADA-SENPAI!!!!)"

"Eh?" Amelia said.

"What do you girls want?" I sweat dropped.

"YOUR DAD'S COMING BACK ON MONDAY?!" Sora asked as she grabbed my shoulders.

"DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THIS MEANS TO US?!" Matsuri asked. 

"KYAAAAH! I CAN'T WAIT TO MEET YUNA SHIRAZAKI!" Lamy jumped around so much.

I deadpanned at the girls.

"...It's just my mom and dad. Why're you all freaking out?"

"BECAUSE IT'S MINATO AND YUNA SHIRAZAKI!!!!!" They shouted.

"I mean, I've always looked up to her drawings..." Ina said.

I then looked down.

"...Well, it's understandable. They're celebrities."

"Ey, don't you all be going and spread this around, okay? I don't want unnecessary attention." I said.

"Yeah 3x." They all said quickly.

"Your mom and dad is Minato and Yuna Shirazaki?" Amelia asked.

I nodded.

Amelia's POV

I then blushed a lot.

"MINATO AND YUNA SHIRAZAKI?! OH MY GOD!"

You do not know how big of a crush I have on Yuna Shirazaki. You could even say I fell in love with his mom!

I held my face, and turned a lot.

"NOT YOU TOO!" Yamada said.

Yamada's POV

I sighed.

"Well, let's shake hands, and you can return that."

Amelia snapped out.

"Y-Yeah..."

We shook hands, she got the pieces, I got the mat, and we put it inside Amelia's tube.

"Well, how about we go have lunch now?"

Amelia nodded.

"Y-You're gonna have lunch together?!" Gura asked.

"U-Uh? Yeah. Why?" Amelia asked.

The JP branch girls looked at me angrily. HoloEN? They looked at me in a weird way, but for Amelia, they sweat dropped.

"So your new girlfriends are the HoloEN members?" Sora said as she prepared a pocket knife.

"I didn't know you were hanging out with your kouhais more." Aki said as she showed a pocket knife.

"Well, I guess you're going into a special room just for you, Yamada.~♥" Choco said as she giggled sinisterly with a whip at hand.

"Hmm? I guess it makes sense, since kouhais are like little siblings." Korone said as she prepared a butcher's knife.

"Any last words, Yamada?" Noel said as she got her mace, and pounded it gently on her left hand.

"Well, polygamy is a thing, but just so you know, girlfriends aren't permanent." Coco said as she got the Demonfire Dagger.

"Isn't that hypocritical?!" I thought.

"Even though we're your kouhais too, you won't even bother hanging out with us once in a while?~♥" Aloe said as she prepared a stiletto.

"C'MON! I DIDN'T KNOW THAT, BESIDES, I WAS BUSY DOING STUFF!"

"Like what?!" The JP girls asked.

"Making music, playing Smash, and Vtuber stuff, you know?!" I said.

"You're not planning to make Amelia your girlfriend, are you?" Kiara glared at me.

"IT DEPENDS ON THE EVENTS, BUT MOST PROBABLY, NO!"

After a while, they got rid of the knives.

"Well, I guess that's reasonable." The JP girls said.

I sighed in relief.

"Well, anyway, let's go, Yamada-senpai." Amelia said.

I nodded.

The girls made way, and we went into the meeting room.

"So...who's your type of girl, Yamada-senpai?" Amelia asked.

I almost spat my food out of my mouth.

"Uh...why do you ask?"

"Just curious." She smiled.

"As long as the girl is not a bitch, I'm fine with her."

"Like what?"

"A cheater, a slut, a whore, a gold digger, attention whore, toxic, feminist, and all the other dissapointing women?"

"Oh, I see. Do I look like your type?"

"Well, I don't know. Physically, you are my type. Trait-wise...? I don't know. I feel a bit lazy to read your mind right now."

"Oh? You're physically attracted to me?" Amelia teased.

"Don't even get an idea, Amelia." I said immediately. 

After a while, I sensed a lot of presences on the door.

"Come in." I said.

Amelia looked at the door all surprised.

The girls then came in, and they pouted.

"You're having a nice conversation there." Kiara said.

"So you made Amelia-chan your new girlfriend?" Matsuri asked.

"No, Matsuri." I said.

I read Kiara's mind.

I deadpanned, and looked at my bottom left.

"...I never knew Kiara was this gay."

I found a girl, and she loves other girls.~ She said that she tried, but she's not into guys.~

Hell, they're bisexual. Why do you think, despite them being my girlfriends, they do lesbian stuff? I'm the only one here that's heterosexual. 

"You girls hungry?" I asked.

"N-No. We already had lunch-" Noel said.

All their tummies rumbled.

I laughed a lot.

The girls blushed in embarrassment.

I then cleared my throat.

"Sit down. I'll make you girls some food."

They then nodded, and sat down.

I visualized what me and Amelia had, and I duplicated it for all of them, even the HoloEN. Though, out of all of them, Gura's the most eager. She loves food.

For Suisei though, I gave her all meat. She's a picky girl.

I also materialized spoons and forks.

"Dig in!" I said.

I mean, it did take a lot of LF from me, but hey, I got a bigger LF pool now.

They nodded.

They put their hands together.

"Itadakimasu!"

They dug in.

"Woah. They're fast, alright."

They're hungry as shit.

"By the way, why're you all here?" I asked.

This unrealistic coincidence actually happened.

"Well, Yagoo said in the Discord server that Minato Shirazaki will be coming here along with Yuna Shirazaki on September 14." Polka said.

"And he said that you had something to do with Amelia-chan. As soon as we heard that, we immediately went to the building." Fubuki said.

We then continued eating, and chatting.

Amelia's POV

While we were eating, I was thinking...

"If Yuna Shirazaki comes here...I should think of a way to somehow get a piece of that ass..."

I mean, have you ever seen her butt? I heard only exercises by doing Yoga, and Zumba, but...damn, that's one meaty ass for somebody that doesn't do calisthenics, or something.

I started thinking of a plan to somehow get it.

"First, I'll gain Yamada-senpai's trust. After we get close enough, and they come here, I'll inject my concoction in him, and I'll tie him up somewhere. After that, I'll pretend to go to his mom to get alone time, and then I can have sex, and then we'll do other naughty stuff, and then-"

"Amelia?" Gura asked.

I snapped out.

"Y-Yeah?"

"Is something wrong?" She asked.

"Nothing, really." I giggled.

"Well, that's a rundown of what I'll do."

I looked at Yamada, and got a bit guilty.

"I mean...I don't really want him to have harsh feelings, but..."

I thought of getting his mom's body.

"Man...she's just such a perfect woman though."

Yamada's POV

After we ate, they went home, and I talked a bit with Yagoo to record a cover in 3D, I went to record God's Plan x Toy - Drake & Takayan.

Lyrics:

("Yeah they wishin' and wishin' and wishin' and wishin'"
They wishin' on me.~") 2x

"Ima wa dashitai jibun mo kakusou hyōjō mo kimochi ga barenai yōni~"
"Togedarake no tenohira o muriyari tsukanderu~"
"Furueru idakareteru no ni katayoru ai It's on me (It's on me, hey)~"
"Kill jiga minai kimi igai (ai ai)~"

"Furikaeru ima made kare wa waratta? itto ni koi shita naka de~"
"Ichi do mo nai desho? sonomama furimukanai yo sore ga unmei~"
"Asa ga kureba tagai tanin de kon'ya mo 'suki' to 'mukiryoku' totomoni~"
"Good 3x night tsukaisute no omocha~"

"God's Plan. God's Plan.~"
"I hold back, sometimes I won't (Sometimes I won't, yeah)~"
"I feel good, sometimes I don't (Sometimes I don't, uh)~"
"I finessed down Weston Road (Yeah, wait, uh)~"

"Might go down a G.O.D (Yeah, wait, uh)~"
"I go hard on Southside G (Yeah, wait, uh)~"
"I make sure that Northside eat (Yeah, wait, uh)~"
"And still..."

"Bad things. It's a lot of bad things that they wishin' and wishin' and wishin' and wishin'. They wishin' on me. (Yeah, oh)~"
"Bad things. It's a lot of bad things that they wishin' and wishin' and wishin' and wishin'. They wishin' on me. (Yeah they wishin, they wishin' they wishin' on me, yuh)."

"She say, 'Do you love me?' I tell her, 'Only partly' I only love my bed and my momma, I'm sorry.~"
"Fifty Dub, I even got it tatted on me. 81, they'll bring the crashers to the party.~"
"And you know me. Turn a O-2 into the O-3, dog.~"
"Without 40, Oli', there'd be no me.~"
"Imagine if I never met the broskis. Gooooo-~"

"-oooood. God's plan (God's Plan)~"
"I can't do this on my own. (Do this on my own)~""Someone watchin' this shit close (This shit close, uh)~"
"I've been me since Scarlett Road (Since Scarlett Road, uh)~"
"Might go down as G-O-D (Yeah, wait, uh)~"
"I go hard on Southside G (Yeah, wait, uh)~"
"I make sure that north side eat (Yeah, wait, uh)~"
"And stiiiiill...."

"Bad things. It's a lot of bad things that they wishin' and wishin' and wishin' and wishin'. They wishin' on me. (Yeah, they wishin', they wishin'. Yeah, they wishin')~"
"Bad things. It's a lot of bad things that they wishin' and wishin' and wishin' and wishin'. They wishin' on me. (Yeah, oooh nooo)~"

"Ima wa dashitai jibun mo kakusou hyōjō mo kimochi ga barenai yōni~"
"Togedarake no tenohira o muriyari tsukanderu~"
"Furueru idakareteru no ni katayoru ai It's on me (It's on me, hey)~"
"Kill jiga minai kimi igai (ai ai)~"

"Furikaeru ima made kare wa waratta? itto ni koi shita naka de~"
"Ichi do mo nai desho? sonomama furimukanai yo sore ga unmei~"
"Asa ga kureba tagai tanin de kon'ya mo 'suki' to 'mukiryoku' totomoni~"
"Good 3x night tsukaisute no omocha~"

I then finished recording, after about 30 minutes of doing everything. I made one mistake while I recorded it, which was forgetting the lyrics to God's Plan. I had to record the adlibs, and I had to mix it myself, since A-chan was sleeping in the office, and Tomoko actually had a day off. ;-;

In the end though, I'm very proud of it, and the staff members helped me a lot. This was going to upload around this afternoon, so I let them take care of it, and I went back home via portal to my room.

I sighed in relief as I lied down on my bed.

"The coolness..."

Welp, I guess I'll go ahead, and continue doing stuff.

I went on social media, looked at some clips, got some ideas for music, studied openings in chess for a bit, and danced for 1 hr 20 mins on dancing for the Zumba.

Once it hit around 4:10 PM, I thought that I could try to make a silly short vid.

I remember Lemonade - Internet Money existed, and that Mask off challenge where the two guys were high af, so if I mix that, I could make a somewhat cool funny vid.

I then recorded on a green screen.

"Purple cup, yeah, that's what I've been sippin'.~"
"Got yo bitch, and you know she fuckin' stripping.~"
"Got a chance, so you know I get the ticket.~"
"All day. Yeah, I'm fuckin' pimpin'.~"

I then uploaded it.

I stretched a bit.

"Alright. Time to go check some comments...oh?"

I checked my sub count.

"599k subs?!"

Oh shit, I need to prepare a 600k sub special right now.

"BRAINSTORM!"

I thought of ideas.

After 10 seconds, I couldn't think of ideas.

"Fuck it, make a thumbnail quick."

Why settle on one idea, when I can go crazy, and do lots of shit? Let's go make this bitch flexible.

I then prepared a thumbnail quickly, and the title is this.

"OH SHVT, 600K SUBS?! LET'S DO SHVT, MADOSHIS! I'M SEISO AS FVCK FOR THIS CELEBRATION!"

The thumbnail is a chibi me celebrating, but my facial features are askew.

I then streamed immediately as soon as I setted up everything for OBS, and prepared Hardcore Minecraft ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

...what do you think Hardcore Minecraft is? DIFFICULTY-WISE! I'M NOT THINKING OF ANY DIRTY STUFF, I SWEAR!

"Konnichiwa! The Mage of Shirazaki Yamada, Hololive, is here!"

I clapped.

"We're going wild, madoshis. I'll be doing Hardcore Minecraft, but I will do various things while playing Hardcore Minecraft, whether it's a challenge or not. LET'S GO!"

I went into the world, and my objective right now is to make a lot of bows for dispensers.

"Okay, this is dangerous, madoshis, but I'm willing to take the risk. I'm gonna go and get bows. Most probably, I'd like to find a dungeon, and then a spider spawner, whether it's a cave spider, or a normal spider spawner. LET'S GO!"

I then went, and while I was searching, I talked about some stuff I found absurd, and funny about women.

"So...women 3x...guys, ever had experience with women before? Not experience like sex, but experience like how they argue, how they think, and all that shiz? I have. Lemme tell you, it's weird." I giggled.

"Um...one time, I was out with Shion and Aqua, cause I'm a lonely single man third-wheeling them, and...we went to the guitar store to buy some strings for my acoustic guitar, and there was a women that I'm acquainted with there, and once we went out, they were like 'Is that your girlfriend?' like, what the frick? She has a boyfriend! They went to conclusions way too fast!" I giggled.

"Have you guys ever heard K-von's episodes where he talks about skills that women have that men don't? Yeah, I can confirm that all the Hololive girls are certified women. One time, in a food court, me and Old Man Yagoo went to the bathroom together, but our stuff was with them. Note that we were all there, so from 0th gen - 5th gen, all the girls were there. So after we were done, we went back, and they saw that I had a lewd pic of Watame." I laughed.

"It was the gothic uniform one. One of the skills that he mentioned was that women can break into a phone by the time you go from the bathroom to the dining table. I think it was Okayu that broke into my phone? I don't know, but they all had the balls to want to know what I have been hiding. I'm telling you, they're all certified women. I could actually tell you guys way more, but I'll leave it off at that. I'm telling you all, they're certified women." I laughed.

"I'm telling you. I don't know how Old Man Yagoo has been dealing with them, and normally has no problems, but when I come in, it's like one of those messy chart memes."

I kept quiet for a bit.

"There's also something I find funny about women. Ever heard girls talk about their type of guy, but for some reason, they all seem to go for one type of guy, and it's usually a bad boy, a unique man, or somebody that dominates girls? Ever experienced that, madoshis?"

"Like-Here's the thing. Sora actually likes muscly guys. That makes sense. But for other girls that say they like 'nice guys'. Trust me, they don't. That's bullshit from my experience. Girls want a man that's unique. Yes, there are girls that like kind men, but they don't want a yes-man. You gotta be a yourself. You get friendzoned? Don't even stress it. One day, something will change. So men, when girls say they like a certain type, don't be down, cause one day, they might change their mind when they see that you stopped being a yes-man. Or maybe just don't give a fuck. Girls love men that give 0 fucks." I giggled.

I continued looking for a spawner, and after about 10 minutes, I found one.

"Finally! I can make bows now."

Question: Is it a cave spider spawner?

"Well, let's see..."

Yup. It's a cave spider spawner.

"Motherfucker. RUN!"

I went out, and looked at my back.

A cave spider was still chasing me.

"Get away from me, fiend!"

I then used a sword, and killed it.

"Good thing I'm not poisoned."

I continued getting as much strings as I could, and after that, I went back home, and made dispensers, and got water buckets, and filled every single one of them. I also proceeded to make hoppers, and chests, which was a bit tedious, since I need wood, and iron, but in the end, I made my automatic farm, and I planted some seeds. I also slept.

"Alright. So there's that. Last objective, I guess, is to make preparations for an iron farm."

I made fence gates, rails, and made the structure for the iron farm. I also put carpet around so that the iron golem will have to spawn in that water part

I waited until it was nighttime, and once it reacehd nighttime, I got a zombie, and trapped him. I also gave it a block so that it won't despawn.

After that, I got 3 villagers in, put 3 beds, and I trapped them inside.

After testing it out, it worked.

I clapped a lot.

"Good thing it worked. I'd be pissed if my iron farm had a problem." I laughed.

"Anyway, I guess I'll go switch it up, and do a challenge."

I then quitted Minecraft, and got rid of the screen.

"Alright. Madoshis. I'll be writing a rap. Give me a topic, and if I see it worthy, we shall start writing."

I then looked at the chat, and I found one interesting topic.

"...Hmm, you want me to mumble rap?" I laughed.

"Oh god, I don't know how to mumble rap. You probably mean like...flexing? Something like Slim Shady? You know...'You're wacker than the motherfucker you bit your style from. You ain't gon' sell 2 copies if you press a double album.'" I giggled.

"Or maybe in like Homicide. 'I got bitches, I got hoes, I got rare designer clothes.'"

I cleared my throat.

"Alright. Let's go make a short nonsense rap. I'll leave it to the clippers and musicians for the instrumental, since I'm going for acapella."

I then wrote after some funny moments in my stream, just thinking of some punchlines, while interacting with my madoshis. That 'Yo, my name is Yamada' joke also appeared a lot in the chat. It took me 7 minutes, because there was some looking back and forth on the chat if there was nice suggestions.

I also rapped in Luna's voice, cause 1: They challenged me to do that, and 2: It's funnier to rap in Luna's voice.

Verse 1:
"Hololive Male. I'm Shirazaki Yamada.~"
"A mage with surprises. In your face like Slim Shady.~"
"All the haters hate me, but I don't fuck with y'all.~"
"I'll be laughing at your dead bodies like Logan Paul.~"

"Cause I killed ya! I murder beats. You're technically brain dead.~"
"A Battle Royale, but you're Fortnite, while I'm at the apex.~"
"Cause you whine like babies. Here's your fuckin' babyron.~"
"Slam your keyboard, cause the only thing you know is spamming buttons.~"

"I may look very thin, but I can knock you out like Mark Hunt.~"
"I ain't a heavyweight, but 1 punch to the face, and I'm done.~"
"Just walk away, I won the match. No more debate, I am the best.~"
"Go ahead. Start doxxing me. But just know you can't fuck with me!~"

"It's motherfuckin' doom! Mess with me, then it's most definitely (Mos Def-initely) gon' end with a boom. It's on time, not like a ten-to-three.~"
"When I say, then I will be the virtual mage emcee that will be on every platform like 'Madvillainy.'"

Chorus:
("I'm a mage with magical, intangible, phenomenal powers.~"
"I'm a mage, and I stand prominent. Spend all of these hours-~"
"-Making bars. Coming hard like a Bullet bill.~"
"Give you all big surprises, give you lots of thrills.~") 2x

I stopped rapping, and laughed a lot in my normal voice.

"That sounds stupid, and I love it." I laughed.

"I'm hoping for some good ass beat to be put over this. I'm looking forward to it, madoshis! By the way, the instrumental I thought of in my brain was I Just Don't Give A Fuck - Eminem."

I rapped Mos Def's freestyle from that Art Of Rhyme documentary while proceeding to do other things for my celebration stream, which included singing songs, making beats, and later on, surprise calls...in clusters...and then getting scolded by the girls for not making this earlier, and cause I didn't pay attention to my sub count, which was true, but yeesh, it's like my mom trying to nag me.

The stream took almost 3 hours, so once that was done, I ordered food in Uber Eats, since I do feel a bit lazy to cook.

I then played some chess, Tetris, and Smash. I got my order amidst the playing. After it reached 8:00 PM, I took dinner, and chatted with some girls, and I copied this exact line before I went to sleep, and pasted it to every girl's DM. Only the JP ones though. 

"Night girls. Have a good sleep."

Just for a little oxytocin boost.

I then slept.

.

.

.

.

Yamada's dream start~

The girls were having a good time, popping drinks. 

I decided to tune in.

"Hey, girls-"

They immediately glared at me.

"U-Um..." I said.

"Leave us alone, please." They all said.

I sweat dropped.

"H-Hai..."

I was a bit hurt, and then I just went back to my bedroom after making a portal.

I slept for a bit, and afterwards, I noticed that my body was cold.

I opened my eyes, and I was naked.

I had tape on my mouth, and Choco got rid of it.

"Well 3x, we're very horny right now, Yamada.~♥" Choco said.

"Wait, you can't be serious..." I said.

"Well, since I'm the horniest, I'll go first.~♥" Marine said.

"Marine-"

She started sucking my dick, and Aloe used rope to hold my head back, and Noel and Mio held my hands down.

Choco put tape on my mouth again, and I was trying to scream for help.

"HRRN!!! HRTRGTRJHRTJNTRJ! (HELP!!! I'M BEING RAAAAAAPED!)" I shouted.

I knew this was a dream, but it's one of those dreams where even though you know it's a dream, you still act out everything.

Sept 11, 2020 6:50 AM

I woke up in a cold sweat.

"...What the fuck was that dream?!"

WAS IT BECAUSE NOEL WAS ANGRY AT ME THE OTHER DAY?!

"HOW IS THAT CONNECTED TO RAPE?!"

That is one of the weirdest dreams I had, despite it being short.

"...Does that dream mean I should stay away from the girls a bit?"

I'm taking that chance. I did like spending time alone before, so how about I go back to the old days?

"Yeah. Let's do that....if possible...I might go on dates, actually...nevermind, just forget the dream."

Not the speedrunner Dream though.

I then went downstairs, and took breakfast. While I took breakfast, I noticed my boxers were wet. I somehow got a wet dream from that.

I took a shower, and I put clothes on.

I then went through the day, doing stuff, and went on a date with AZKi, Mio, and Coco, which also ended up as a huge meet-up with the others in the Hololive building, resulting to us talking, and getting to know each other. When I went back home, I streamed Smash Ultimate, but I used different characters. We trained when it reached 3:00 PM, and around 6:00 PM, I played Among Us. Goddamn, it was a blast. I won all 14 matches. 7 of them is me as an impostor. Good thing my madoshis were also honest, and did not stream snipe.

Sept 12, 2020 3:50 PM

I'm in the group call with Marine and Aqua.

"Hey, Marine, and Aqua."

"Konnichiwa, Yamada!" They said.

"You ready for Smash?" I said calmly.

I can't contain my excitement. I really want to own them. This'll be fun.

"Yeah. I'm good." Marine said.

"Are you ready though, Yamada? You are a Cloud main, but maybe I might beat you?" Aqua asked.

"I'm fine. I did try other fighters in Smash Ultimate, so I might be good. Yoroshiku onegaishimasu."

They laughed.

"I might get my ass beaten, or something." I said.

Hell no. Man up.

"So...We go like this, right? Yamada vs Marine, Marine vs Aqua, Aqua vs Yamada, for 5 matches, right?" I asked.

"Yup!" They said.

"Great. Let's go!"

When it hit 4:00 PM, we started streaming.

"Konnichiwa, madoshis! The Mage of Shirazaki Yamada, Hololive, is here!" I said.

They said their intros as well.

"I do find your intro a bit weird, even though that's supposed to be a joke, Yamada." Marine said.

We laughed.

"I mean, what can I say? I messed up, and now, it even reached r/all in reddit." I said.

No shit. Some people wondered who the fuck am I. Some, cause I'm currently trending. Anything to pull people into the Hololive Rabbit Hole wwww >:)

I clapped once.

"Anyway, are you girls ready?" I asked them.

"Yes!"

Me and Marine went first.

I chose Cloud, and then Marine picked Pikachu.

"I'm gonna beat you up, Yamada!" Marine said.

"Hai. I'm expecting to lose here." I said.

I was grinning so hard. I'll make sure you suck my dick so much, you won't forget it...figuratively speaking...for now.

After the match started, she tried to send a neutral b, but I did a Nair.

She started trashtalking.

"Hai, Yamada. Just stop. You're already suck-WHA-"

"I'm what again? I'm sucking?"

I did an up tilt, and I started juggling her.

"C-C-C-Chotto! I was just joking!"

"HUH?! JOKING?! I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA BEAT ME UP?! IT SEEMS THE ONLY ONE BEING BEATEN UP IS YOU!"

I then launched her off the stage, and charged my limit.

"I thought you're good at Pikachu?" I asked.

"URUSAI!"

She fastfell, and I rolled out of the way.

We kept having back and forth, but I managed to Nair her, and I started doing combos.

She said this prior to the combo: "Are? Yamada? I thought you were a Cloud main? Why are you going back, huh? HUH?! WHY'RE YOU SO TRASH AT PLAYING CLOUD-"

Now~

"Y-Yamada, you like girls, don't you?"

"HUH?! YOU'RE MAKING A LAME EXCUSE TO SAVE YOURSELF?! YOU FUCKING NOOB!"

I launched her in the sky.

"I THOUGHT YOU'RE GOOD AT TRASHTALKING?! IT SEEMS YOU'RE ONLY GOOD AT BEING TRASH!" I said, and I launched her with a cross slash.

"ITAI!"

I then went back down, and I charged my limit.

"URUSAI! YOU'RE MORE GARBAGE THAN ME!" She said.

We laughed, but Aqua was laughing her ass off.

"Ne, it's a friendly match, you two!" Aqua said.

"Ah, gomen." Me and Marine said.

I tried to Nair her, but she did that Up B thing where you teleport, so she escaped my attack.

"Ah, frick." I said.

We landed on the ground, and she kept sending those electro-balls.

"HUH?! YOU DON'T KNOW ANY OTHER ATTACKS ASIDE FROM NEUTRAL B-ah, yabe." I said.

She started comboing me.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY 3X? I THOUGHT I HEARD YOU SAY THAT I ONLY KNOW ONE ATTACK?!"

I then got launched off stage.

"THAT HURTS, YOU KNOW?!"

We're both high percentage.

She tried to jump, and try to spike me, but I did Climb Hazard up and down, and got to her first.

"Ah, yabai. MERCY, PLEASE!"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY EARLIER?! TRASH PIKACHU!"

We both landed on the stage, but she did Down B, so I got electrocuted.

"AAAAHHHH!"

I'm dead.

She then launched me off the stage, and it's 1 - 2.

"HAH! CAN'T EVEN BEAT A WOMAN!"

I audibly cracked my neck and knuckled.

"Oh...it's on..."

"Y-Y-Y-Yamada, I was joking-I WAS JOKING!"

I went serious mode, and I gave her no rest.

"YAMA-I love you, you know?~♥ You want to have a girlfriend, right?~♥"

"I DON'T CARE! A GIRL FRENDO IS WHAT I WANT!"

I smashed her.

"AAAAAAHHHHH!"

It's 1 - 1.

"YOU'RE SO TRASH, YOU CAN'T EVEN BEAT A CLOUD MAIN, AND CLOUD'S NERFED IN SMASH ULTIMATE!" I said.

"OMAE TACHI! REMEMBER, THIS IS A FRIENDLY MATCH! NO TRASHTALKING!" Aqua said.

"Sorry.~" We said.

We tried to attack and trashtalk each other.

"Are? Is this what you call a pro Cloud main?" Marine said.

"I thought you're good at Pikachu? You suck!" I said.

I down tilted, and she got launched.

"YES! YOU SUCK! THIS IS WHY YOU MAIN PIKACHU! CAUSE YOU ALWAYS KISS MY ASS!"

"URUSAI! I DON'T KISS ANYBODY'S ASS!"

I air combo'd her.

I whistled, and launched her off stage.

I went back down, and charged my limit.

"Every little thing I do.~ Never seems-"

"URUSAI! YOUR VOICE IS ANNOYING, LIKE CLOUD!"

"CLOUD HAS A COOL VOICE, OKAY?!"

She went back down, and I tried to Climb Hazard her, but she teleported, so I stopped.

She landed below me, and did Down B.

"KUSO!"

She then tried to juggle me, but I tech rolled to the left, and dash attacked her, but she shielded, and we did loads of attacks on each other to no avail.

"N-N-N-Nani kore?" Marine asked.

We laughed.

"WE'RE NOT HITTING EACH OTHER!" I said.

We backed off, and shielded.

"Come at me." Marine said.

I did so, and instead of doing a Nair, I did a Climb Hazard.

She dodged out of the way, and I dashed towards her while short hopping. She rolled, but I did an Up air, and she got launched up.

"HAH! SHOULD'VE KNOWN WHERE YOU SHOULD ROLL, YOU ELECTRIC RAT!" I said.

My limit break was full.

I juggled her in the air, and then I cross slashed in the air, and won.

"EZ! THAT WAS A SHORT AND EZ MATCH!" 

Marine then "cried", and Aqua...she was still laughing hard.

"Not even a challenge. *fake spit* Disgusting! YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUR GAMEPLAY-"

"DAMAREEEEEEEE!"

We laughed.

"Aqua, are you there?"

"*wheezing* There was so much trashtalking, I couldn't focus on the match!" Aqua said.

We laughed again.

"Well, it's your turn, Marine, Aqua."

"Yup!"

Marine used Luigi, and Aqua used bowser

They then fought. They trashtalked less...disappointing.

Marine won the match, and Aqua lost.

"MOUUUUU, I EVEN TRAINED A LOT USING BOWSER!"

"Why did you even use Bowser? You should've used Steve or something." I said.

"Well...I wanted something new." Aqua said.

We laughed.

"I'm gonna own you this match now though. I'm not even gonna use Cloud. I'm gonna use Mario." I said.

"Eh? Really? I bet you're trash at using Mario!" Aqua said.

"Aku-tan...ano, this is a friendly match, okay? No trashtalking." Marine said.

"Hai!" Aqua said, and we laughed.

I chose Mario, she chose Cloud.

"You know...this is kinda reminiscent of my first match in Smash Ultimate, cause I used Cloud against Mario, but now, this is reverse."

"If I remember correctly, Cloud won against Mario, so if that's the case, then I'll win this!"

"Heh, try me, onion-head."

"I'M NOT AN ONION-HEAD!!!!"

The game started, and I short hopped, and fireballed.

She jumped, and tried to do a Dair at me.

I rolled, charged my F.L.U.D.D, and tried to Fair her.

She shielded, and did a down smash.

"ITAI!"

"HAH! YOU SUCK AT USING MARIO! JUST DIE! YOU'RE ONLY GOOD AT USING CLOUD! DIEEEEEEEE!"

I recovered, and air dodged.

"Nope, you're not getting me." I said.

We laughed.

I landed, rolled, and charged my F.L.U.D.D.

She tried to send a Blade Beam on the ground, so I jumped, and fireballed at her.

After that, I used F.L.U.D.D, and I sent her off the stage.

I sent a fireball, and tried to Fair her.

She used Climb Hazard, and tried to recover.

I also tried to recover, but she grabbed the ledge before me, so I had to Up B.

I charged my side smash, and she jumped, so I missed.

I shielded, and used a fireball on her.

She shielded, and I tried to Fair her, but she did an up tilt, so I double jumped, and fireballed at her.

I then fastfell, rolled back, and I charged F.L.U.D.D.

She charged a bit, so I went, and tried to Nair her, and she did a forward tilt.

I went over her, so her tilt didn't do anything.

I then did an up tilt, and I started juggling her.

"HAH! YOU SHOULD'VE USED AN UP TILT SINCE OF A FORWARD TILT! IDIOT! THIS IS WHY YOUR BRAIN IS AN ONION!"

"DAMARE!!!"

She got sent up, and I fastfell.

After I landed, I immediately charged my F.L.U.D.D, and I rolled away from her to the right.

She sent a blade beam, so I jumped, and sent a fireball at her and used my F.L.U.D.D.

"STOP WITH YOUR FIREBALLS!"

"EH? YOU'RE THAT TRASH THAT YOU CAN'T HANDLE FIREBALLS?!"

"Guys, remember, it's a friendly match." Marine giggled.

"Ah, sou. I love you, Aqua.~" I said.

Right as I said that, she didn't time her Parry properly, so I did a Nair.

"AH! I HATE YOU, YAMADA!"

I did an air combo, and it's 2 - 1.

"Hai, I'm going to win this. Love you as a friend, Aqua.~♥" I said.

"Huh? Friend?! I don't even know who you are!"

Oof. This onion's a bitch. You know what I do to bitches, right?

"Ah...sou ka..." I said.

I cracked my neck, and went more serious.

"M-M-M-Matte-kudasai-I love you too as a friend, Yamada.~♥ Yamada? YAMADA! OMAE! I ALREADY SAID I LOVE YOU! WHY THE HELL ARE YOU STILL TRYING TO KILL ME?! SCREW YOU!" Aqua said.

While she said that, me and Marine were laughing a lot, but I was laughing the most.

"Hai, I'm gonna end this quickly.~"

I went on to trashtalk her more, and win the match.

"YAMADA!!!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO A GIRL?!"

"I DON'T CAAAAARE!! ALL THAT MATTERS IN THIS FRIENDLY MATCH BETWEEN 3 FRIENDS THAT DO FRIENDLY FIGHTING IS WINNING! I'M EVERYBODY'S WINNING MAGE!"

I started singing while clapping to the beat.

"I can't get over you.~ Can't get over you-"

"URUSAI! YOU'RE ANNOYING! YOU'RE GARBAGE! SHUT UUUUUUUUUP!"

"Calm down, you two! It's just a friendly match!" Marine said.

"Ah, hai. No hard feelings, Aqua.~"

"Yup. I definitely did not rage, Yamada.~" Aqua said.

We laughed.

We continued on. I won all the matches against them. Marine and Aqua were tied.

"Well, I guess when you're a mage, magic happens, and I just never lose, do I?"

They groaned.

"SHUT UP! YOU LOST A COUPLE TIMES IN YOUR SMASH STREAMS!" Marine said.

"YOU'RE JUST LUCKY! IF I WAS IN TIP-TOP CONDITION, YOU WOULD LOSE!"

I clapped twice.

"Hai. Now, you 2 gotta repeat what I say, okay?"

"Hai." They said, and giggled.

I started laughing sinisterly.

"W-What's with that laugh?" Marine said.

"Nothing."

We laughed.

"Dewa, repeat after me...'Yamada-sama.~♥ You're the best smash player ever.~♥ We love you.~♥ Chu.~♥'"

"HOW ABOUT NO?" They said.

"Ah, what a bunch of losers. You're so trash, you can't even understand orders."

They pouted a bit, and then gave in.

"Alright, I'll go first, then Aku-tan." Marine said.

Marine then recited hers.

"Yamada. You're the trashest player in Smash ever. I hate you. Bleh!"

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!" I asked.

I cleared my throat.

"Anyway, Aqua?"

"What Marine said. BAKA!"

"THAT'S NOT EVEN CLOSE TO WHAT I ORDERED YOU 2 TO DO!"

We laughed.

"Well, it doesn't change the fact that you 2 lost. I AM THE KING!"

I then got a crown out, and put it on my head.

"See? I'm the king."

I moved myself to the middle, so now the ones on the bottom right are Marine, me, and then Aqua.

"BOW BEFORE YOUR MASTER!"

"How about no?" They both said.

"Then you're stupid."

They hyperventilated.

"GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" They both said.

We laughed.

"That was not idol-like!" I said.

I got rid of the screen, and we talked for a bit before ending the stream. The talk was just about moments during the stream.

After that, we ended the stream.

"Ah. That was a nice stream."

After a while, I heard these exact words from them:

"Yamada-sama.~♥ You're the best smash player ever.~♥ We love you.~♥ Chu.~♥"

Then they left the call.

I was so surprised, I looked at the discord server for 1 minute straight.

"...Did they just..."

I smiled.

"Well, at least I got to hear that from their mouths."

What nice girlfriendos.