(A/N) this story was created due to a challenge by my dear friend @Orgell who gave me the following words to work with: Lollygag, Toast, Star tear disease, Execution, Spit , Blood clot, Butt plug, Train station

Really good selection, right?

If you see random bold and underlined words, this is the reason.

Anyway, since Orgel and I just celebrated one year of friendship, I made this a JongTae fanfic inspired by the Star Tear Disease - An illness born from subjects of unrequited (of a feeling, especially love not returned or rewarded), where the subject cries out stars.

The final result came out pretty well, I hope you'll like it!

---

Star Dust

It was bad.

Extremely bad.

Fuck, terrible, even.

Taemin should've known something was wrong from the very first night it happened to him. However, he's never heard about this before, and when it happened, it left him utterly confused.

His eyes started burning, and it was unlike anything he's ever felt before. The burning only intensified as his heart clenched and broke into pieces at the sight of him with a pretty girl on his lap, his lips lazily caressing her neck so openly, in front of everyone.

Jonghyun wasn't even drunk. There were alcoholic drinks on the table in the cramped karaoke room, but Taemin knew for a fact that he didn't drink any of them, not even a sip. He was driving tonight, and if there was one thing Jonghyun was, it was responsible.

If he were drunk, it would've been easier to accept, maybe, that Jonghyun seemed to only have eyes for everyone but him. Maybe in a drunken haze, Jonghyun thought the girl's eyes were pretty, and he decided to have some fun with her tonight and forget about her the next morning. He's done it time and time again, Taemin heard, but it was the first time it was happening in front of his eyes, and it stung.

But Jonghyun wasn't drunk.

He was into this girl for real, he wasn't in any drunken state to make him irrational. He liked this girl enough to let her straddle him in the middle of the fucking karaoke room.

The burning intensified.

Although hurt, Taemin tried his hardest to keep his tears from flowing. He smiled and sang along and even danced with everyone to all the happy songs in the karaoke machine. He focused on the lyrics on the screen and held his microphone tight, he sipped on mocktails, and occasionally, he'd nervously rub his thighs with his hands just to focus on something else but Jonghyun.

Despite the age gap between Taemin and the rest, he didn't feel out of place, even if he was the youngest and they were sometimes treating him like a little kid that needed to be doted on. Jonghyun treated him the same way.

Maybe that was the problem. Jonghyun never saw him as a man, he's only ever seen the cute, innocent, young Taemin who needs protecting from the big scary world. Jjong was more than willing to offer that protection, but not in the way Taemin wanted it. He assumed the 'big brother' role and rolled around with it while Taemin's feelings grew and grew, to the point where it became painful to be around Jonghyun without clinging to him.

That night, Taemin kept swallowing back his tears, but the burning in his eyes just kept getting worse. He started rubbing them repeatedly, but it would do nothing to ease the discomfort he was feeling.

Eventually, he decided to go home early, made up a pointless excuse no one would remember and headed straight to the door.

"Taem." Jonghyun called to him, making him turn his head around. Fuck, he hated this. He hoped he could get out without having to see that girl straddling him again, but it appears Jjong unintentionally wanted to remind him one more time that his lap would never be Taemin's place.

"Yeah?"

"Need me to drive you?"

Yes.

"No."

"Let us know you're home safe, then. Mkay?"

"Sure thing." Taemin faked a smile and got out quickly.

Fuck, he was barely able to see. His eyes hurt, and everything was blurry. The lights hurt him. He rushed home, and he didn't even know how he got there with how little he was able to see.

Going to the bathroom, he looked in the mirror and almost had a heart attack. His eyes were blood shot; it looked like all his veins in them popped open. Shit, it was scary.

He started googling out symptoms, but nothing checked out. He didn't think he was allergic to anything he drank tonight; his eyes weren't necessarily dry, and he didn't have any allergies or infections (that he was aware of, anyway), so... why was he looking so horrible?

Maybe he was under too much stress. He did have a hard time at Uni lately, and even if his older friends assured him that it's normal to be stressed in your last year and that everything would be okay, he kept thinking that maybe they were wrong. Maybe he was that one-off case you read about in the news - the young man who gets so stressed, he has a heart attack. He did smoke a bit too much lately, and smoking is a risk factor for the development of blood clots, if he remembers right.

Fuck, maybe he's dying.

He was trying his hardest to remember how he got in this state. He met Jjong and the rest, they went to karaoke, then Minho called up some girls who turned up, and then that one brunette got on Jonghyun's lap and-

Ouch. He pressed his hand on his heart and felt his eyes burning up again.

Right.

He started feeling this way when he noticed how much Jonghyun seemed to enjoy that girl's company, how into her kisses he was, how he couldn't seem to get enough, so he pressed her against his crotch right there in front of him, how-

Taemin couldn't think about it anymore; the burning got so intense, he started blinking repeatedly and rubbing his eyes. It was so weird. He wanted to cry, to let it all go and feel his emotions just as he'd always do, but something was wrong this time, for instead of tears, a single, pale green star-shaped thing fell from his left eye.

He managed to catch it before it went down the sink's drain, and confused, he started inspecting the little thing.

Sure enough, it was a star. A slightly greenish star with five corners.

Bewildered, he tried to touch it with his fingers, but as soon as he did, the small star shattered with a crystalline sound right on his palm.

He looked back in the mirror, and as if by miracle, his eyes returned to their normal colour. They were no longer blood shot and irritated; it was as if he'd imagined the whole thing.

~

The next day, Taemin went to Uni feeling more confused than ever. He's asked around to see if he's able to find anything about his condition, as Google didn't prove to be too useful in his quest. He even went to the infirmary to ask the nurse if she'd ever heard of this before, but she just shrugged and told him to stop taking drugs while it's still early enough, and that she can help him if he'll let her.

But hell, he was not high. He didn't take any drugs. Not willingly, anyway.

Maybe there was something in his drink?

Yeah, that's the only logical explanation.

Maybe he did dream about everything.

After all, who's ever heard of crying stars?

~

"Taeminnie!" Jonghyun exclaimed. "Thank God I'm here early. I came to get you. Would've missed you if I came by 10 minutes too late. Why aren't you answering your phone?"

"Jjong?" Taemin looked perplexed.

"Did you hit your head?" He ruffled the younger's hair lovingly, then grabbed the straps of his backpack and forced him to take it off his back. Taemin complied.

"No, I didn't." He rearranged his hair while Jonghyun put the backpack on his own shoulder. "But why are you here?"

"Well, for starters, you didn't message me last night."

"My phone ran out." He shrugged.

"And you're not picking up today."

"Left it on silent and I didn't see you calling."

"You little liar." Jonghyun ruffled his hair again. "You're lucky you're cute."

Taemin blushed and turned his head away.

"Did you have fun last night?" He asked, but as soon as the words came out of his mouth, he regretted it.

He didn't want to know.

"Oh, yeah. I went to Amber's after dropping everyone else home, had a few drinks, had some fun with her. You know, just the usual."

"Mhm." Taemin nodded, swallowing back the lump in his throat. His eyes started to burn again, similarly to last night.

What if it wasn't a dream after all?

"But enough about me! I want to know how you're doing. Feels like we haven't talked in ages!"

"Well, you're always busy." Taemin shrugged.

"Don't be upset, Taeminnie. I made time for you today, haven't I?"

"Where are we going, anyway?" Taemin stopped in front of Jonghyun's car, confused by his friend's demeanour.

"Well, since it's Friday, I thought I'd do you a favour and get you out of the house more."

"I'm always out of the house with you and the others, though." Taemin retorted.

"Yeah, but that's no fun, is it? I meant just the two of us."

Taemin blushed, and he felt the burning in his eyes suddenly stop.

They hopped in the car and Jonghyun clicked on his playlist, familiar tunes filling the empty space in-between their chats and their laughter.

"The beach?" Taemin asked with a raise of his brow when he looked out the window and saw seagulls.

"Yeah. You told me you haven't been in years, so I decided, heck, I don't have any work today, so why the hell not? Good idea, right?"

Taemin scoffed and laughed briefly as they finally reached a parking place.

"Well, I'm glad to be here, but I'm also starving."

"Of course, I thought about that as well, who do you think I am?" Jonghyun rolled his eyes and opened the trunk, taking out a picnic basket.

"Jjong, it's freezing. Are we having a picnic?" Taemin laughed enthusiastically and clapped briefly.

"I know the taste of my food will overwhelm all the other senses. Besides, there's blankets for us, and I even got two coats, just in case."

Yeah, that's why Taemin fell in love with Jonghyun in the first place. His attention to detail, to whatever Taemin talks about; he remembers everything, even the small details, and he's so damn attentive. It's impossible to not fall in love with such a man.

Even if he doesn't feel the same.

The burning came back with this thought, but Taemin was quick to shake it away as soon as Jonghyun linked their arms, dragging him towards the beach.

"Now it's time to take your shoes off." Jonghyun commanded and pointed to Taemin's feet while he took his own shoes off himself.

"Jjong, it's freezing."

"Taem, we're at the beach. You don't walk on fine sand with shoes on, that would be such a waste."

"Fine. But if I'm catching a cold, you have to nurse me back to health."

"Not like I have a choice. You're always soooo clingy when you're sick!" Jonghyun ruffled his hair lovingly.

"Ugh, stop treating me like a child. You're only 3 years older!" Taemin stuck his tongue out, when Jonghyun quickly grabbed it with his hands.

After some struggle, Taemin managed to get his tongue back in his mouth and made a disgusted face.

"You didn't even wash your hands!"

"You'll live. Now, let's set the table and eat!" Jjong clapped once excitedly and started arranging the blanket on the sand, putting the basket on one of the corners, and dividing their shoes on the other 3 to prevent the blanket from flying away from the wind.

"This looks amazing. When did you even have time to cook this?"

"Well, your birthday is coming soon, so I thought-"

"My birthday?" Taemin laughed. "We're only in February."

"Eh, what's a few months?" Jonghyun waved his hand in the air.

"Your birthday is sooner. Only two months."

"Then we're celebrating my birthday. Try this!" He quickly grabbed a tempura shrimp and put it directly in Taemin's mouth, and the younger chewed it with a smile.

"Wow, this is actually really good!"

"Well, what else did you expect?!"

"You're the best." Taemin chuckled.

"I know I am."

"Your head will grow too big from the praise." Taemin shook his head.

"Look who's talking. You adore praise." Jonghyun retorted with a roll of his eyes.

"No, I don't."

"Yes, you do. Wanna bet I can make you blush just by praising you?"

"No." Taemin laughed briefly and tried to focus on the food, but Jonghyun didn't want to drop it.

"Come on. You're doing so great, swallowing food like that. Good job, Taeminnie. Should I give you some toast for being such a good boy?"

"Oh, shut it." Taemin laughed and playfully slapped Jonghyun's thigh, trying to hide the blush creeping on his cheeks.

Damn, he really was a praise princess.

"The wind is really picking up." Jonghyun remarked as one of their napkins flew away.

"Yeah. You made sure to have everything prepared but forgot to check the weather." Taemin laughed, and just then, some sand blew into his mouth. "Ewww!" He tried to spit it all out, unsuccessful, all the while Jonghyun kept laughing at him.

"If you're done eating, we should go stick our feet in the sea! Walk along the shore, you know the drill."

"Jjong, it's freezing."

"It's the third time you've said that today."

"And I'll keep saying it. We'll definitely catch a cold."

"Come on, don't be so negative. We won't catch a cold. Let's go!"

"No. You can't make me stand up." Taemin shook his head, but Jonghyun would not take no for an answer, so he bent down and picked the younger by his legs, dragging him away from the blanket through the sand.

When Taemin stood up to protest, Jonghyun took advantage and picked him from his waist, placing him right on his shoulder and running away towards the sea.

"You're fucking crazy!" Taemin shouted with a laugh. Truth is, this is another part of Jjong that made him love him. He was so persuasive, and always found a way to get what he wants. His personality clashed perfectly with Taemin's, and every time they'd meet, just the two of them, it was impossible for them to not pointlessly fight about something.

Taemin liked it, for it made everything funnier, and time spent with Jjong was always entertaining.

If someone else were to pick him up like that, Taemin would've exploded in anger, but with Jjong, everything was different.

"They say birds of a feather fly together, so I guess that means both of us are crazy." Jonghyun put him down with his feet right in the water, and Taemin grimaced.

"It's so fucking cold, I'll die of hypothermia."

"You'll die of drama."

"Better come to my funeral and apologise when that happens."

"Will do, Taem. I'll be on my knees begging for your forgiveness for forcing you to stay with your feet in the water."

"Freezing cold water." Taemin corrected.

"Come on, it's getting warmer by the minute."

"You're just getting used to it."

"And aren't you?"

"Yeah, I guess so." Taemin chuckled.

"Then, what if I splash you?"

"Jjong, for the millionth time, it's freezing. Splashing me with water would be the same as taking me to the electric chair for my execution. I'll genuinely catch a cold."

"Just pop an ibuprofen and drink some tea and you'll be fine~!"

"You're so carefree, aren't you?"

"Of course! You know I enjoy my life to the fullest!"

"I'm-"

"Let me guess! Freezing!" Jjong started to laugh. "Okay, you win. Let's get out, Taem."

They made their way back to their picnic blanket and Taemin looked down at his wet feet that collected sand on the way from the sea to their little space on the beach. He hated the feeling on his feet, but Jonghyun came once again prepared, and pulled out a large water bottle and a towel so they can remove the extra sand stuck on their skin.

"It's already getting late." Taemin observed. "Should we go back home?"

"Home?! No way, Taem, you're stuck with me for the whole weekend!"

"What?!" Taemin gasped. "But Jjong, what about my homework and-"

"Boring~!"

"You little-" Taemin narrowed his eyes and jumped on Jonghyun, starting to tickle him. The older squirmed and begged to be spared, but Taemin wouldn't have it.

"Okay, okay! Sorry! I just wanted to spend some quality time with my best friend! Sue me!" Jonghyun eventually managed to get out, breathless by the whole ordeal. He was holding his hands on his belly protectively and feared any unexpected movement from Taemin.

"Okay. Let's say I do ignore all my responsibilities for the weekend to spend time with you. Where do we sleep?"

"I booked a room at an inn somewhere around here."

"Good, let's go and rest, I'm tired as fuck."

The duo headed towards the inn and got to their room in no time. They kept talking about nothing important for a few hours, before finally taking out two futons out of the closet and arranging them neatly on the floor.

"This is quite comfortable, isn't it?" Jonghyun asked, taking in a deep breath.

"Yeah. It's really warm."

"Ahh, I love this place."

"Have you been here before?"

"Oh, yeah." Jonghyun chuckled. "With one of my exes. We came here on her birthday a while ago. Honeymoon periods are the best."

Taemin hummed, but as soon as he heard Jonghyun, he got that weird sensation in his eyes again.

"She was a really nice girl, but we didn't really work out."

"Why not?" Taemin asked, although he wasn't sure he really wanted to know, because with every word coming out of Jonghyun's mouth, it seemed the pain in his eyes only intensified.

"Well, we wanted different things from life. She wanted to get married and start a family as soon as possible, whereas I..." He hesitated.

"You wanted to live your life first." Taemin turned to his side to face Jonghyun, even though it was dark, and they couldn't see each other.

Of course, Taemin knew this fact about his friend all too well. He knew how much he loved the sea, for instance, and how suffocating the big city they lived in could feel at times. He knew Jonghyun would stop at nothing to see what else was out there. He'd head into the big scary world with no hesitation if it meant expanding his horizons.

JJong has always been that type of person who would without a doubt go to the train station and buy the next ticket to nowhere. If given the chance to have some days off work, he'd hop on a train and sit in a window seat, admiring all the sights their little country had to offer: fields, mountains, rivers, sheep, cows... he wanted to enjoy the wide world his own way, by observing and breathing in some fresh air.

It was one of the many reasons that made Taemin fall in love with him. They were so different in this aspect. Taemin preferred comfort; he hated going out of his bubble and trying new things. If he could, he would only go to the same restaurant to have the same meal on the same day of the week for the rest of his life. He knew which buses and trains he had to take to get to the same familiar places, and if he would never have to get out of his mundane day-to-day life, he wouldn't mind it.

When Jonghyun came along, he challenged Taemin's whole world. He challenged him to be different, to step out of his comfort zone and experience new things, which was so scary at first, but with each passing day of Jonghyun pushing him around, he started enjoying experimenting.

From new foods to new places, to new museums, to new parks, and even to new people, Jonghyun made it his mission to force Taemin to go out and explore the world around him.

To both of their surprises, it worked. Taemin was more sociable now, and he discovered he appreciated new things as long as Jonghyun was next to him.

That's how it started, and that's how he realised his growing feelings for his best friend.

And now, in the warmth of his futon, Taemin couldn't help but wonder why Jonghyun seemed to have feelings for everyone but him.

"Yes, exactly! She was perfect otherwise. We had great chemistry, she was a looker, smart, funny. Ugh, life is so unfair!" He chuckled, but Taemin could barely focus on his words.

Ugh, this hurts. He rubbed his eyes, and just as Jonghyun started talking again, seemingly surprised that Taemin knew him so well, he excused himself to the bathroom.

Looking in the small mirror, the same redness as last night was present in his eyes. He couldn't wrap his head around it.

If he was unsure of anything last night, he was absolutely certain now that he didn't have any allergy, dust didn't get into his eyes—or was it the sand? No, it couldn't have been—and there was simply no logical explanation.

He was hurt because Jonghyun happened to come to this inn with another girl, and he truly loved her, enough to remember her God knows how many years later.

Ugh.

He started crying again, and just as last night, no tears came out. There was only a twinkle sound, and a couple of green stars, and once he looked back in the mirror, his eyes were back to normal.

He didn't bother catching the stars this time; he just let them fall in the sink and shatter. He couldn't understand it. It made no sense.

And why green?

Out of all colours, why were his stars green?

It almost seemed like, because he was jealous...

No, this couldn't be it.

He returned to the room and tried to brush the thoughts off, but still, he was unable to shut it down.

"Jjong, do you believe that colours have meanings?" He asked all of a sudden, interrupting his friend. He didn't hear what he was saying anyway.

"Huh? Colours?"

"Yeah. You know, like... emotions. Red is anger, blue is sadness, green is envy..."

"Oh." Jonghyun chuckled. "I don't know. I mean, yeah, colours do make me feel something, but... I prefer to focus on the positive meanings instead. Red is love, blue is calmness, green is nature... you know?"

"Tsk, always such an optimist." Taemin muttered.

"Why did you ask?"

"I don't know, I just... I was thinking about it." Taemin smiled sadly and was glad that his friend wasn't able to see him in the dark.

It would add up. Last night, he felt jealous seeing that girl in his lap, and today, he felt jealous again as soon as Jjong mentioned his ex.

He cried star-shaped tears of jealousy.

But why?

~

"Why are we here again?" Taemin asked, embarrassed.

"To buy a butt plug, of course." Kibum grinned from ear to ear.

"This is a very weird bonding activity." Jinki commented, but curiously picked up multiple items from the shelf and analysed them. "Look, this one has a rhinestone in it!"

"I feel like this trip will unlock a new fantasy for Jinki." Key chuckled, and all the boys started laughing.

They were trying to pick up a gift for Jonghyun, whose birthday was approaching way too quickly, and although all of them prepared some 'serious' gifts, like new books or a new vinyl for his pick-up, Kibum suggested buying something else as well — something he would remember.

Thus, the 4 boys were now in a sex shop, browsing through different types of toys, plugs, condoms and whatnot, and Taemin had no idea why he had to be there in the first place. Key could've just picked alone.

"What about this one? It has a little reptile tail. It kinds looks like a dinosaur when you squint."

"Uhm... does it matter what it is? Will he even use it?" Minho chuckled, and Key rolled his eyes.

"Come on, he's the type who'd definitely experiment with taking things up his ass."

"Ï don't know. He's not you." Minho said with a snicker.

"Yo, lamppost, I think I'm gonna shove this up your-"

"Okay, okay!" Jinki got between them and pushed them aside. "Let's just get the rhinestone one."

"Hyung, you can get it for yourself if you like it that much," Taemin commented so quietly, it almost came out as a whisper.

"Should I?" Jinki looked at the little box with a lot of concentration in his gaze. "Then, do we get a matching one for Jjong?"

"Why, are you guys fucking?" Minho asked, and Taemin's heart dropped. Were they?

"God, no. He's just my friend. I was just saying."

"Let's go with the reptile one." Taemin butted in, trying to change the subject as quickly as possible.

"That's what I'm saying! Good choice, Taeminnie!" Key ruffled his hair, annoying him. He was once again treating him like a baby.

~

"Wow, this is certainly... unexpected." Jonghyun laughed loudly as soon as he tore open the cute pink packaging and saw the small box.

"Taemin picked it for you!" Key grinned, and Taemin immediately wanted to disappear.

"We all went to the shop!" He protested, trying to avert his gaze away from Jonghyun's.

It didn't work, for when he raised his eyes again, Jjong was still looking at him with a determined gaze, as if challenging him again.

"What?" Taemin asked, embarrassed.

"Nothing. It's cute." Jonghyun smirked, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Why a dinosaur, though?"

"Well, we always say you look like one, so..."

"I like how many shades of green it has. Quite interesting." Jjong held the buttplug in the air, examining it under the light of the bulb above, and Taemin immediately frowned.

How many shades of green did Jjong see, exactly?

Taemin barely saw one, and even that looked dull.

"It's so vibrant, too." Jjong went further, and all the boys around the table nodded in approval.

What...? Taemin shot up and snatched the plug from Jonghyun's hands.

"What's wrong?" Jinki asked, concerned.

"N-nothing. Hey, gotta go. Sorry!" Taemin threw the plug on the table and practically ran out the door, not even hearing the 4 boys shouting after him.

He ran and ran and ran until he got home, and once he did, he opened his computer and typed in the word green in the search bar.

It was like his mind was playing tricks on him, as he certainly didn't remember colours looking so dull and lifeless.

He typed in pink and was met with the familiar vibrance of colour, which made him more confused than ever. Once again, he typed in green.

Dull. Faded.

But why?

Why didn't it look as it should?

Why?

~

Weeks have passed and with them, the finals were creeping in faster.

There was a lot of studying Taemin had to do, which inevitably meant less time spent with his friends.

Less time spent with Jjong.

Taemin didn't notice the weeks passing by, as there was just so much to do. What he did notice, though, was that green was no longer that green.

His sight didn't return to normal, and he still couldn't understand why.

He was certain it was because of Jjong, because he was now also experiencing the same symptoms with the colour blue, after noticing that this separation was only difficult for him, as Jonghyun didn't seem to miss him too much.

Taemin cried pale-blue stars every time Jonghyun took too long to reply to his messages.

Blue. Just like his feelings.

It hurt, but what was there to do? Jonghyun didn't feel the same.

This thought alone made his vision blurry again, all the symptoms of the Star tear disease starting to reappear instantly.

He couldn't cry again, not when he had so much to study. He had to think about something else.

Fuck, his eyes stung. Again.

Soon enough a few blue stars followed with a twinkle sound as they shattered against his desk.

He was crying stars again, the blue shade way deeper now, and when he was done spilling his sadness, the ink of his pen looked almost black.

He could barely see the colour blue.

~

"It's finally over!" One of Taemin's classmates exclaimed, walking leisurely with his hands above his head, stretching with a yawn. "I swear to God, this exam was so long I thought I might pass out."

"Tell me about it." Taemin chuckled.

"Oh, isn't that the dude you were seeing?"

"Hm?" Taemin turned his gaze towards the gate and saw none other than Jonghyun, waiting for him next to his car. "I'm not seeing him."

"Really? I thought you were an item or something, he used to come here like everyday."

Yeah, used to. Rang through Taemin's head. Ever since Jonghyun's birthday, they've barely spent any time together.

A pang made its way through his heart as he looked at the man waiting patiently.

As Jonghyun saw him, he immediately straightened up and showed him the widest smile.

"Taeminnie!" He said, coming closer and ruffling his hair. "Looking good!"

"Likewise." Taemin smiled shortly. "What are you doing here, Jjong?"

"What, can't I come see my favourite person?"

My favourite person.

He doesn't mean it.

"Besides, wasn't today your last exam?" Jjong continued asking.

"Yeah."

"See? I remembered. I'm such a good brother." He boasted proudly. "I'll treat you to some good food for all your hard work this semester!" Jjong decided, and there was no space for arguing as he instantly opened the door to his car and shoved Taemin inside.

The way to the restaurant was pleasant like usual, and it was like no time has passed at all since they've last seen each other, even if, in reality, almost two months passed.

"So, did you miss me?" Jonghyun asked jokingly, his eyes on the road.

"Mhm."

"What was that? I couldn't hear you~" He kept teasing Taemin, unaware of the other man's inner turmoil.

"I didn't have time to eat, let alone miss anyone." Taemin replied, looking away through his window. The trees were a dull shade of green, and the sky had almost no colour to it. It was a blue-tinted grey.

"Aww, you're so mean! I missed you lots, Taeminnie."

"Good for you."

"Hey, did I do something wrong?"

"No."

"Okay."

"I'm just hungry."

"Makes sense." Jonghyun chuckled. "Me too. We're almost there."

And Jonghyun was right. They got to the restaurant less than 3 minutes later, the song that started playing on the radio not even having enough time to get to the end.

To his surprise, Jonghyun took him to an extremely fancy restaurant, and they had a reservation.

"Jjong, is this okay?" Taemin whispered as they were being led to a private room. "Seems really expensive."

"Of course. Everything for my smart friend." Jjong smiled brightly. "You deserve this for studying so hard these past months."

They sat down opposite from each other, and plates of food began being brought to them minutes later. It seemed Jonghyun had it all planned to the notch.

"Do you like it?" He asked after a while, both of their faces stuffed with food.

"It tastes incredible." Taemin replied delighted. "You know, I always thought expensive restaurants were stupid because they serve such small portions, but eating here definitely changed my mind."

"I'm glad."

"So, what have you been up to lately, Hyung?" Taemin asked with a smile that dropped as soon as Jonghyun answered.

"Oh, just the usual. Work, work, and work again. But I met someone new, and we've been on a couple of dates, and she seems nice enough."

The food started choking Taemin, who tried to cough the unchewed bits out.

"Wow, you okay?" Jonghyun stood up, rushing to Taemin's side to pat his back.

"Yeah, I'm fine. You were saying something about a girl?"

"Oh, yes." Jonghyun sat down right next to Taemin instead of going back to his place on the opposite side of the table, as he excitedly started describing the lucky woman to him, and all the lollygagging they engaged in these past couple of weeks.

Taemin couldn't eat anymore, and with each of Jonghyun's words, he tried swallowing his tears back. His heart was hurting. Couldn't Jonghyun see the turmoil he was putting him through?

"Why did you even take me out?" Taemin mumbled under his breath, unaware that Jjong would hear him.

"What do you mean?" He titled his head unaware. "I told you. You did so well that I had to-"

"You didn't do this for any of our other friends." Taemin countered, cutting him off. "You didn't take Kibum or Minho or Jinki out, even though they had way more exams than me and even finished Uni and their Master's."

"N-no, I didn't..." Jonghyun rubbed his nape awkwardly.

"Then, why? Why did you take me out, just to talk to me about some random girl you've been fucking?" The younger asked harshly.

"What do you mean, Taeminnie?"

"Don't call me that." He frowned and turned his eyes to the unfinished food on the table, that was sure to stay unfinished, because he wanted to get away.

No, he needed to get away. Now.

Hastily, Taemin stood up and grabbed his backpack from the floor.

"Wait-" Jonghyun followed suit and grabbed his wrist to force him to stop.

"What?" Taemin asked, without even turning to look back.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what you meant, but-"

"Oh, fuck this, Jonghyun. You always do this shit!" He spoke harshly, letting go of all the feelings he'd been suppressing in his chest that were making it hard to breathe.

"What did I do? Taemin, look at me, please." Jonghyun urged him, and he finally looked back, his eyes full of sadness and disappointment.

"You take care of me. You treat me nice. You take me out on dates that you don't call dates, only to then break my heart and tell me about how much you love someone else. Why, Jonghyun? Why are you doing this to me?"

"Taemin... what's this?" Jonghyun watched in awe as a bright red star fell from Taemin's eyes with a twinkle sound.

"Not this again..." Taemin tried to wipe it off, the sound getting more intense as the stars shattered against his fists.

"Holy fuck! What's wrong with your eyes?"

"I really can't do this anymore..."

"Stars...?!" Jonghyun kept looking shocked at his friend.

"I'm in love with you, idiot!" Taemin finally confessed, pushing Jonghyun back, and without waiting for a response, he ran away from the private room right outside, and tried to put as much distance as possible between him and the restaurant.

Red stars continued spilling from his eyes, pouring out all the passion and love from his heart as he kept running away until his lungs ran out of air, leaving star dust on his tracks.

He didn't know where he was, but knowing that Jonghyun drove him all the way to the restaurant for quite some time, he was aware that there was no chance of going back home on his own. He decided against calling one of his friends and called a taxi instead as soon as his tears dried up and he stopped crying stars.

There wasn't much money in his pockets, so he asked the driver to just drop him off at the nearest bus station, and the way home took more than an hour.

He had to shut down his phone sometime during the bus drive, because Jonghyun was blowing it up, surely worried about his whereabouts. However, he didn't have it in him to answer to at least let him know he's okay, and once he got home, he was glad to see he didn't come see him.

Taemin laid in bed, wondering how his day could start so well and end so badly.

Why did he have to fall in love with someone who didn't love him back, he wondered?

Why did it hurt so much?

He couldn't find any answers to his questions, but glancing around his room, he noticed that the covers of some of his books, once red, were no longer as vibrant.

Loving Jonghyun came at a big price, he thought, and by the time his feelings were dealt with, maybe all the colour would be gone from his world.

~

Taemin was surprised to not hear anything from Jonghyun in so many days. After blowing up his phone that day, he was radio silent.

His absence hurt Taemin even more than his presence, and he found himself crying twinkling stars almost every day. However, they now fell in all colours at once: a blue star, a red star, a yellow star, an orange star... and his world became dull.

Still, he tried his hardest to find joy in the colours he was able to see, so he'd force himself to go out every day, trying not to dwell on the pain in his heart.

16 days later, he found Jonghyun waiting in front of his apartment complex when he returned from one of his walks.

"Taeminnie." Jonghyun whispered.

"Hi." The boy answered softly, guarding himself and building walls around him.

"I missed you."

Taemin didn't reply.

"I'm sorry for not reaching out to you after that day... I just needed some time to... reflect on things, I guess."

"I see." Taemin nodded.

"Taemin, can we talk?"

"We are talking."

"No, I meant... whatever, you know what? I'll just say it. I'll admit that I haven't really thought of you that way... not consciously, anyway."

"Okay."

"But after you confessed, I realised that you were right about everything. Unconsciously, I acted protective of you, and I was careful to not hurt your feelings, and to be there for you... I really took you on dates, even though I hadn't figured out they were dates..."

"Jjong, go straight to the point."

"Fine. I will. I also like you, Taemin. Let's date."

"Wh-what?!" Taemin's eyes grew wide, as he wasn't expecting him to say this. He was readying himself for a proper rejection, so this came up completely unexpectedly.

"You heard me. All this time, I've been searching for you in all my partners, without even realising it, simply because I was too scared to confront my true feelings for you. I won't do that anymore."

"I can't believe this..."

"I love you, Taemin." Jonghyun confessed and pressed his lips against the boy's lips.

Taemin loved him too, but it was too late, for his world has already lost colour, and his cheeks would forever be stained by powdered star dust.

~The END~

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(A/N) Thanks for reading and let me know what you think!

Love you,

Storm