Felix

I started worrying over Everett when he hadn't returned twenty minutes after leaving to take a call from his alpha. He still wasn't back after another twenty minutes, when the movie had ended.

Meleri stretched and headed for the coatrack, getting ready to leave for the night. Magnus looked over at me with bright eyes. "So," he said eagerly, "things are finally on track with Everett?"

I felt myself smile goofily but couldn't stop. "We seem to be getting there," I hedged. Everett still hadn't actually committed to anything – I was painfully aware of that – but it was impossible not to get my hopes up after a day like this one.

He was an incredible kisser.

Magnus smiled, too, and stood up, joining Mel by the door. She already had her coat and boots on, but for once she wasn't tapping her foot in impatience. In fact, her expression looked kind of soft. She was happy for me.

"We'll get out of your hair," Magnus said. "Mel and I both have to get back to work tomorrow, so we probably won't see you until dinnertime."

That only made my smile grow. I loved my siblings, but right now I needed time alone with Everett more than anything. "I'll make eggplant parm," I promised.

Magnus flung his arms around me, squeezing hard. Eggplant parmesan was his favorite meal and I didn't like to make it often because it was a lot of work – I liked to hand-make pasta to go with it. I didn't mind the idea of spending a lot of time cooking tomorrow, though. Everett would be with me.

"Good night!" Mel called on her way out the door. Magnus followed, also calling "Good night!" over his shoulder.

I shut and locked the door behind them, smiling to myself until I remembered that Everett wasn't back yet. He wouldn't have shut himself into his room for the night without saying goodnight to me, would he?

I walked quietly down the hall and listened hard for the sound of talking, something to indicate that Everett was still on his phone call. I heard nothing, though. Deciding to give him a little more time, I went to the bathroom and got ready for bed. After some debate, I decided to forgo a shirt since I usually just slept in boxers. Everett probably wasn't quite ready for that visual, but surely, he could handle me just wearing pajama pants.

Finally, I couldn't delay myself any longer. I knocked softly on Everett's door and waited anxiously. I didn't want to interrupt a conversation with his alpha, but I also didn't want to go to bed without seeing him again.

Everett opened the door and pulled me immediately against him in a hard hug. I hugged him back, but any enjoyment I took from the contact vanished when I realized he was shaking against me.

"What's wrong?" I asked, suddenly terrified.

Everett just shook harder, seemingly unable to speak.

"Okay, we don't have to talk. Let's just sit down, yeah? Can I just hold you for a while?"

Everett just kept shaking and hugging me. After a while, he said, "Can I sleep in your bed tonight?"

His voice came out rough. My mind raced through reasons his alpha might have called, but I simply didn't have enough information. "Of course."

Everett let me lead him to my bedroom, where I climbed onto the bed with Everett settling next to me. The room was dark, but I didn't need to see him to know he was still shaking a little. I settled the blankets over us before pulling Everett into my arms. I couldn't do anything to comfort him except hold him, not until I knew what had happened.

Everett gradually calmed down. Finally, he said, "I have to go back to Delta tomorrow."

I clutched him harder and shook my head in a denial he couldn't see.

Everett sniffed and continued, "They need me back at work. The portfolio I manage is the main source of money in the pack after tithes and someone destroyed it today. I have to go back and try to fix it. It can't wait."

I tucked away the knowledge that Everett was so important within his pack for examination later. I couldn't process it now, not with the sadness that flooded through me.

Tomorrow was my last day off before I had to go back to work. We were supposed to spend the whole day together, and I was going to make him more and more comfortable with the relationship between us. Instead, he would go back to his old life, where the idea of a male mate would feel foreign and wouldn't fit right. He would start to doubt me. He wouldn't come back.

I was spiraling, but it all seemed so logical.

I barely stopped myself from saying, "Don't go." I bit my lip to keep the words in, still shaking my head in a silent protest.

I was going to lose Everett.

Even if it wasn't permanently, when was the next time I would see him? I couldn't take time off from work, not so soon after they had to cover for me for over two weeks. And Everett couldn't leave while his workplace was in crisis.

"Felix?" Everett asked when I continued to say nothing.

"Mm?" I still didn't trust myself with words.

Everett twisted around in my arms so he was facing me. I could barely make out his features in the darkened room. "I'm sorry," he said. My heart ached. My throat was too clogged to speak, so I pressed a kiss to his forehead and hoped he understood.

We lay there, clutching each other in the darkness, until I thought Everett had fallen asleep. I was still wide awake, wondering if this was the only night I would ever spend with my mate in my arms. I tried to memorize the feel of him, his scent, his warmth. I ran a hand up his arm, then down his back, enjoying the way it felt to touch him, even through clothes.

In the morning, I assured myself, I would find my fight again. I would somehow scrounge up the willpower it would take to hold firm against the fear and worry, and to make sure he made the choice to return to me. That was for the morning, though. For now, I wallowed.

Everett nuzzled his head against my chest and sighed. "Felix?" he asked, surprising me.

"Yeah?"

"I'm really going to miss you."

I brushed my thumb over his cheek, finding it wet. "I'll miss you, too. We'll talk every day. That will help."

"I don't think talking is enough."

Was it sick that his words somehow pierced the worry, shooting happiness through me? "Video chat?" I asked.

Everett laughed. "That's not what I meant, but it is an improvement."

"Try not to worry too much," I told him. "You need to sleep – big day tomorrow."

"Don't remind me," Everett said, but he dropped his head down on my shoulder and settled into the bed. I pressed a kiss to his forehead and pulled the blankets up to cover him better, knowing I'd be awake for a while.

--

I was on the edge of sleeping when Everett's phone started chiming cheerfully, horrifying me into waking. Everett groaned and sat up, reaching blindly for his phone and missing. I handed it to him and he turned the alarm off. I could see him only slightly better than during the night. We were still a way off from dawn, but I knew Everett had a long commute to work this morning and needed to make an early start.

"Why don't you go get ready?" I said softly, not trusting my voice. "I'll put something quick together for breakfast."

"Eggs?" Everett asked.

"Sure." I kissed his cheek and hurried from the room. I needed to get a grip on my emotions before it actually came time for him to leave, and watching him get ready to go wouldn't help.

I got eggs going, preparing them just like I had on our first morning together. It was somehow comforting, and I wondered if that was why Everett had asked for them. The idea made me smile.

When Everett came out, he wore office apparel, complete with a neck tie. I blinked at him, surprised by how much I liked this look. I had only seen Everett wearing jeans and t-shirts before now, but he looked... hot. I tucked my hands into the back pockets of his pants and pulled him into a heated kiss. Everett opened for me immediately. It was probably good that we had to separate soon so I could take the eggs off the heat, or we might not have stopped until Everett had to leave. I'd had a lot of time to think in the night, and there were questions I had decided I wanted to ask him before he left.

Everett and I settled down to eat. I wasn't hungry – between my nerves and the early hour, my appetite was gone. Everett ate neatly, glancing at me between bites but not speaking.

We didn't have long now. Ten minutes, maybe. I cleared my throat, pushing my plate away. "Everett," I said, and hesitated. He looked up from his plate and smiled encouragingly. I looked into his beautiful eyes, and desperately hoped he wouldn't regress once he left here. I shook my head, realizing I was too much of a coward to ask for a promise he would return or to ask where exactly he saw our relationship going. Instead I said, "Drive safely, okay? And let me know when you arrive?"

"Of course. And I'll call you as soon as I get home from work."

Everett stood and carried his plate to the sink, rinsing it before putting it in my dishwasher. He looked so at home here. I stood and followed him down the hall. Everett's bag was still open on the bed and he looked at me uncertainly. "Can I borrow something?" he asked.

I frowned in confusion. "You can take anything. What do you want?"

Everett was adorably hesitant as he walked across the hall and into my bedroom. I realized what he was after when he started sifting through my closet; he wanted to take my scent with him. The realization made me feel a lot better. I grabbed my favorite sweatshirt from my chair and passed it to him. Everett brought it to his nose and smiled a little. "Perfect. Thanks."

"You're welcome."

Everett folded up my sweatshirt and tucked it into his bag, then slung it over his shoulder. I took his laptop bag and followed him out to the living room.

This was it.

Everett put his shoes on and hung his jacket from his arm, then turned to me and reached out a hand for his laptop bag. I passed it to him, working hard to keep my expression neutral.

"Talk to you tonight," Everett said, unlocking the door and grasping the knob.

"Tonight," I agreed. I stepped forward and kissed him gently. Any more than that and I'd lose my composure. Then Everett was gone.

I stayed at the door, listening as he got into his car and started it. I listened as he drove away from my house, every second carrying him farther away from me. Then I turned and looked around at my empty house, feeling more alone than I ever had before. I went down the hall to the bed he'd slept in his first two nights here, wrapped myself in the blanket that smelled like him, and cried.