A discreet knock on the door pulled me out of the state I was stuck in. I didn't even know how long I'd been there brooding. Jude's muffled voice came through the door and finally pulled me out of my numbness.

- 'We have some news.'

Up in a split second, with puffy eyes and a red nose despite the cold water, I joined Jude who was pacing in the living room. Just from his attitude, I knew that I would not like the infamous news. He stopped when he heard me arrive and, good for him, made no comment on my looks.

- 'The bullets are made of an alloy of lead, iron and titanium. Pretty unusual for ammunition according to our dear inspector, but... the problem is that none of these metals are harmful to us,' he said as he continued to draw a line in the carpet.

- 'Perhaps not separately,' I thought aloud. 'Perhaps it is the combination of the three metals that has particular consequences on metamorphs?'

This at least had the power to stop Jude in his back and forth movement. He gave me an incredulous and astonished look that gradually changed, to become apparently as intense as his reflection.

- 'Thank you for your astonished look! It says a lot about the credit you give to my intelligence,' I said, barely joking. 'What made me think about it was that the little piece I pulled out of your wound looked like... oxidized, I would say.'

I shrugged: after all, I wasn't a chemist.

- 'Yes, it has to be... But why didn't I think of that before?!'

He hit the call-back button on his cell phone and I heard him ask Worth to take the tests a little further, then he hung up.

- 'Did you keep the fragment? Worth would like it back.'

I took him out of my pocket and handed him a small piece of folded paper containing the precious piece of metal. He opened it carefully and made a surprised whistle.

- 'It looks like it's been chewed up!'

- 'Yes. Apparently by you! These are the only news you had to tell me?' I asked, full of hope and apprehension.

- 'Worth is inquiring about recent purchases of these three types of metals. See if it leads anywhere, but otherwise nothing new.'

- 'Do you have something to make me "feel"?'

- 'It's too dangerous right now, you're...'

- 'Stop, that's it, I've waited long enough. Dangerous or not, I'm going to go! You do as you please,' I snorted, before taking a firm step towards the door.

- 'Without a starting point, you'll go around in circles!'

- 'Then help me, god damn it!'

At the same time, his cell phone rang again. I stopped and approached him to hear his interlocutor better. This was not very useful, as the conversation lasted only a few seconds.

- 'Worth is coming.'

On that note, he left without a word, nor a look for me.

I wanted to follow him, then stopped myself. We were both frustrated and angry, not the best cocktail for a quiet conversation. So I decided to wait for him inside and took the opportunity to think about our options, which, I must admit, were not very numerous. As I recalled all the events of the last few days, a plan began to sprout in my mind. I needed a couple of clarifications, but the more I thought about it, the more I thought it was the answer to finally know who was behind all this. I closed my eyes and tried to relax while waiting for the confrontation, which I knew would happen very soon.

To my surprise, Jude returned earlier than expected, disturbing my rest, and alone. I looked at him and silently questioned him.

- 'Columbo had a setback, some trouble in the city centre. He'll join us later.'

In a way, it suited me, I would have time to explain my plan to him. I took a deep breath and started.

- 'I may have an idea to find out where the missing people are being held. But in order to do so... I need you to answer two questions.'

He had a surprised twitch and stared at me with his penetrating gaze, obviously waiting for the next part.

- 'How is it that I can feel your presence so well? It's almost as if it's obvious now, all I have to do is think of you to instantly know where you stand, or in which direction to go to find you.'

I had a clear idea of the answer, but I wanted confirmation. He said nothing for several minutes that seemed endless to me, while I tried to hold his gaze. If this was a test, I intended to pass it. He finally sighed resignedly and shook his head.

- 'Because I drank your blood. But given your lack of surprise, you must have already suspected it. Then why do you ask?'

- 'Just to be sure. And now my second question: is that also the case for you?'

Obviously this one, he didn't see it coming.

- 'And why do you want to know... Oh no, you can't think about doing something so stupid? This is insane! No way I'm getting involved in this,' he said vehemently as he walked towards me, before changing his mind immediately and turning around.

He went to the fireplace where he turned around and leaned against it, then, arms crossed on his chest, he stared at me with a stubborn look.

- 'So I guess the answer is yes, and you understood where I was going with it. I expected your caveman reaction, no surprises there. But take some time to calm down and think... It's the best and maybe even the only solution. If we do not want to waste months on unsuccessful investigations, which we cannot even do if we remain holed up like rabbits anyway.'

- 'It's far too risky. They'll shoot you on sight and it won't change anything. Where is your head?' he shouted, lightning in his eyes. 'Anyway, the answer is no.'

Surely realizing, from my perplexed and more than angry look that I hadn't fully understood his last sentence, he thought it would be useful to specify.

- 'No, it doesn't work both ways.... At least not with sufficient power for what you're considering.... So the discussion is closed.'

I was stunned for a moment. If what he had just said was true, why had he reacted so violently to my suggestion? It didn't make sense, unless...

- 'It will work if I drink your blood,' I said while watching him change color in front of me. 'Won't it...?'

He had gone from sickly white by the time he realized that I had understood to glowing red when he realized that, although I disliked the idea, I would still be ready to go through with it.

God, he was so handsome. This parasitic thought suddenly imposed itself on my mind for no reason. Unfortunately, it was barely enough to offset his very friendly personality. What the hell was I thinking? Oh and after all, just because I don't intend to touch doesn't mean I can't look. I compelled myself to redirect my thoughts to the current subject. Nevertheless, his disproportionate reaction taught me something important.

- 'Considering your reaction, you know that my idea is valid,' I said with a little smile on my face, 'and you hate that!'

I knew that wasn't the reason for his anger, but I wanted to provoke him. I knew it was childish, but then I couldn't help myself. He took my provocation for what it was and chose not to answer it. He stood there, standing in front of me, clenching his fists, and I saw that his anger and determination were gradually giving way to resignation.

- 'It was mainly you they tried to kill,' I told him more gently. 'Since you've been with me, you've almost died three times in as many days. It seems I'm not good for your health!' I tried to joke, but the words had a bitter aftertaste, because when I said them, I realized that they were very true.

- 'You know that's not true. It was just luck that got us out of there alive last night.'

- 'You have a point. Maybe they got tired of trying to capture me with you by my side, because let's be honest... you're worse than a leech! But I think if I play the docile bait without anyone around, they'll try to capture me. This will allow you to track me to the place where they are holding me and, hopefully, the other victims as well.'

- 'There are far too many unknowns and "if" in your plan. The risks are far too great, and we're not even sure it will work,' he said, looking at me sadly, any trace of anger having temporarily deserted him. 'You are unique and so your reactions may be just as unusual. We can't predict how you'll react if you drink my blood.'

Despite his relevant argument, I gradually felt him weaken at his voice.

- 'Apparently, it's already worked in one way, so why not in the other?'

- 'Because you are much more receptive than most, you don't have any animals to restrain yourself. As far as I'm concerned... it might be different.'

- 'We try, and if it's not conclusive, I promise to give up. Well, if you want to?' I breathed, my voice slowly fading away at the end of my sentence and my eyes glued to my feet.

Suddenly, I felt much less confident. What if the real reason for his refusal was that he didn't want even stronger ties between the two of us? He had already made it clear to me that I was more of a liability than anything else to him. Suddenly certain that he would refuse despite everything, the feeling of loneliness and abandonment that never left me completely struck me with the strength of a heavyweight. I swallowed the tears that I felt coming up and began to move slowly towards the door, when I felt my hands gently resting on my shoulders.

- 'I'm willing to do it on the condition that you know all the implications and that we're 100% sure that it will allow me to find you. You may be an unbearable bonehead but... I don't want to lose you. I never want to lose anyone again,' he whispered so quietly that his last remark was meant for him alone.

So I decided, out of respect for his privacy, not to address it. If he wanted to talk to me about it, he would do it in his own time. He gently drew me to him, my back against his chest, and hugged me tenderly while letting his head rest against mine.

- 'I don't know what you've been through in the past, but you emit so much despair and pain at times that it's suffocating,' he whispered softly, his lips against my ear. 'Do you want to talk about it?'

I wouldn't have reacted any differently if he had slapped me. I suddenly pulled myself away from his arms and moved as far away as I could as I glared at him, before letting my anger explode. Better that than my distress.

- 'Like you don't know about it!'

- 'Of course I don't. Otherwise I would not be so cruel as to ask you about it,' he said, offended.

- 'Charles knows!' I managed to say it without shouting.

- 'In case you haven't noticed, I'm not in his good graces and I never have been,' he said bitterly. 'Besides, I haven't been a part of Charles' community for very long. So I'm not aware of your story.'

- 'As I am not aware of yours, so we are on even. Since I don't think you want to be more open about it than you already are, let's leave it at that and get back to our current problem. Tell me about the implications.'

He sighed and sat on the couch. As I didn't want to look like an idiot, I went to sit in the chair and took the opportunity to regain control of my emotions while waiting for him to begin his explanations.

- 'First, you should know that this is quite a rare practice among metamorphs these days and that it is normally only practiced between members of the same "animal species" and only among couples. Secondly, the link thus created will be extremely strong and normally irreversible. Thirdly, and not the least worrying, it is a totally taboo practice between two shapeshifters of different species, so imagine with a human! So we have no idea what the consequences, positive or negative, may be.'

He then kept quiet and just watched my reaction, elbows on his knees and head in his hands. He may have looked relaxed, but he wasn't, and I couldn't figure out if he hoped his revelations would scare me away or, on the contrary, comfort me in my idea. I must admit, I didn't know what to think about it myself. In view of his revelations, it was a decision that required some time to think. The problem is that I didn't have any time. So I had to make a decision and quickly, because if Jude saw any hesitation on my part, he would use it to justify his refusal. I realized that I had already made my decision unconsciously, while reflecting on this.

- 'So let's summarize,' I said in a light voice. 'If I continue with my plan, I will bind myself for life and in a completely forbidden way with a man who doesn't like me, and this, without any guarantee of results? With the added risk of undetermined and potentially dangerous side effects... Is that all? I haven't forgotten anything?'

At the end of my speech, I got up and sneered at him. It is true that when said like that, it seemed totally stupid and irresponsible to me, and considering Jude's satisfied grin, exactly the desired effect. However, he did not push his luck and waited for me to come to the right conclusion on my own. I stared him straight in the eyes with my most determined look and my most beautiful smile.

- 'How do we do it?'

Just seeing his reaction, it have been worth it! His smug, satisfied look crumbled pitifully to give way to stupor and then anger. He got up and came towards me with a menacing stance.

- 'They forgot you on the day of the brain distribution or what? Oh, God, damn it...!' he said meanly, as he held back more swear word. 'It's far too dangerous. Can you get this into your damn head?!'

- 'You're not going to change my mind by insulting me, and you shouldn't have offered to do it if you didn't have the desire to do it anyway!'

- 'I have only one word and if you still want to do it, I will. But I thought...'

- 'You thought I'd chicken out!' I whistled between my teeth.

- 'No, rather that you'd hear the voice of reason. But I had apparently overestimated your intelligence,' he said bitterly and maliciously.

I looked down at his gaze, which expressed too many things, things I hadn't understood until now. He was a loyal and very honourable man. If we completed the link, even if he didn't like me, he would never let me down. Instead of being his ball and chain for several years, I will become his ball and chain for all eternity, which, by the way, could be very short for both of us if it was known. I suddenly realized that I was asking too much of him. I was willing to take the risk myself, but not to drag him into this with me, not at that price.

- 'Okay... you're right. We will seek another solution.'

A flash of surprise and relief crossed his eyes, and he nodded to me. At the same time, his phone emitted the little beep that was characteristic of the arrival of a text. He read the message and I saw his face crumbled. The phone fell on the carpet with a little thumping noise, when his strengthless hand let it go. He lifted his head up with great effort as if he had all the weight of the world on his shoulders and, in a tired but determined voice, said:

- 'We're going to do it.'