Q: help my friends have my wattpad, this could go badly
A: welp

No warnings
The last chapter explained all

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Sherlock was scared now. The whole Molly thing was bad- he didn't want his coat to go to prison.

Never.

He wouldn't let it happen.

So, he marched up to the station.

Not to help the person who's eye was having a fit, no, but to report her

Some may say this was cruel.

But most do not understand the intimate bond Sherlock shares with his coat

Soon, he was knocking on a door, then walking in without a response

"Sherlock?" A surprised Lestrade asked
"How did you know? I was just about to call you! "

"Because I'm smart" sherlock responded haughtily, though feeling the need to add
"And you always need moi"

Lestrade wiped a tear from his face
"Beautiful. And yes, I do"

Before Sherlock could ask why, a distressed John broke in, dragging the spasming figure of Molly behind

"sHeRloOk" he cried
"aLl taHt t1me iN tHe bEdRooM. yOu sAid oUr wh1p waZ foR coRpseS oNlie"

Sherlock, once he got over the horrific grammar his.. 'Partner'..  had displayed, said
"That, my dear Watson, was not a whip. It's the result of a hoe getting eye cancer"

John dropped Molly with a yelp, causing her to hit her head and stop moving.

Sherlock frowned
"I'm disappointed in you John. Go home and punish yourself "

"yEs dAddY" he said, looking disappointed and leaving.

Lestrade locked the door behind him, giving the still body of Molly a kick, before picking her up, and tracing a hand down her backside, until Sherlock coughed loudly

Lestrade jumped, looking between them
"Ssh. You can join. That would be good~"

Sherlock jumped out of the window in horror, wanting nothing more then to get away

Luckily, his coat realized the danger, turning into a parachute and saving him from the two foot drop from the ground floor