"Sometimes we become the monsters of our fears without noticing"
Free Me Poetry

▽▽▽

Elimination Chamber 2017

ALLEN

"And if you are looking like you are not walking out of here as the champion?"

I glanced up from my coffee and saw Tommy holding two coffees before he set them down on the table and took a seat. I chuckled slightly before rolling my eyes, "I haven't seen you around in a while"

"Just being the lone wolf. Honestly, I needed a break from all the backstage drama. I don't know how I became involved in everyone's lives but unfortunately I am" he groaned as he stretched and just when I was about to question why he had set two cups down, Nikki took a seat.

I felt myself tense while she thanked him and politely greeted me. I had been patiently waiting to see her all day so that I could explain to her that there was some confusion and also question what her showing up outside my door meant. But with Tommy sat between us I knew it wasn't the best time even though he could be blamed for the position I was in with his continuous encouragement.

"So, you really don't know who will be walking out as champion tonight?" She questioned me and well she had a pretty good poker face or perhaps she was relieved to assume that I was with someone else.

I shook away those thoughts because I knew she felt something for me, things were just all over the place. I found my morals slipping in the wrong direction whenever I thought of her and I should have thoroughly thought of all the repercussions but I knew what I wanted.

"No, I don't. And even if I did.." I shrugged and cleared my throat.

She sent a small smile my way, "I understand. So, I trust you enjoyed the other night"

My eyes widened as she brought up something while Tommy's eyes darted to mine as she did.

"And what happened the other night?"

"I have no idea. I was in your room remember and Charlotte was in his" she smiled but I knew from experience, in the last few months especially, it was not sincere.

"Charlotte Flair? Woah. AJ, you didn't tell me you were.. "

"If there were anything to tell I wouldn't tell you. But there is nothing to tell, she didn't think she would be needed for another appearance the next day so she didn't book a room. When I got back to the hotel I found her at the front desk and I had two beds in my room" I explained what I had intended except I hadn't thought that Tommy would be present for it.

"Why are you getting so defensive, Allen? You're a single man. You should have taken the chance" She spoke before he could respond which caused me to focus on her.

"Is that so? "

"Yes. There's no point in waiting around for something when you have someone that is available right in front of you. I mean who wouldn't want to date Charlotte Flair" She shrugged while I frowned and also wished Tommy would just get up so I could ask her what I wanted to. She probably thought she was being secretive while Tommy knew I felt something for her so he was enjoying this.

"I don't" I stated which caused her eyes to meet mine. "I know what I want and it's not her"

"And who exactly do you want? " I heard Tommy but before I could answer someone else interrupted which caused Nicole to jump in surprise and our eyes to widen.

"Hey guys" John smiled. "Can I steal my beautiful lady away for a few seconds?"

"Only if she wants to go" Tommy shrugged which caused Nicole to glare at him and John to frown.

"Why wouldnt she? "

Nikki sighed and stood up, holding his hand. "He is kidding, John. Come on"

I watched as they took a seat further down and her eyes focused on him while he spoke to her. I wasn't sure why but I found myself trying to search her eyes to see if I saw the same look she had when she looked at me. I was going crazy all because of her, I hadn't felt so consumed by a woman since my divorce so it was new. I didn't know what I could do to make it go away because pursuing it would disrupt a lot of things yet I still wanted her to take a chance on us.

"I would stop watching them if I were you " Tommy whispered and I pushed him away.

"So, you and Nikki slept together in the same bed" I sighed as I recalled him mentioning he only had one bed.

"Yes, we did. I know that would have been heaven on earth for you but by what I have been listening to, you lucked out when you decided to be a good Samaritan to Charlotte" he smirked.

"She's my friend" I rolled my eyes as I didn't see Charlotte as anything more.

"But you want to prove to Bella that you are willing to wait around for her so I think you need to do better at keeping your distance"

"When she's with her boyfriend right now?" I sighed, briefly glancing at her holding his hand.

"Everything seems perfect from the outside" Tommy's voice tore my focus away from what seemed to be the perfect couple and I didn't respond because maybe I hoped it wasn't perfect so that I would be allowed in. But having that hope would also mean she would be hurt, I saw the signs of her feeling alone which is why I assumed I was a distraction. But there were times where he would be at work as well and she would be hanging out with us more than him so I wasn't sure what to think.

I saw my phone light up and realized it was my ex-wife letting me know she had dropped the boys off and I couldn't contain the smile. I always enjoyed when they came to watch a show...

"If that's a text from Charlotte.. " Tommy warned and I narrowed my eyes at him.

"It's my boys. They are here for the night but I have to do some signings." I groaned as I remembered and as I did I caught Nicole's face as she reached the table without John by her side.

"What's wrong? "

"His kids are here but he has to work before his match. "

"Oh we can watch them. They love me and he can entertain them as well"

"No I can't. I come here to work not babysit" Tommy groaned while she narrowed her eyes at him.

"You don't have to..."

"I know but I want to and so does he" she poked Tommy who glared at her but sighed knowing he would be dragged along with her. I didn't bother overthinking how she had him wrapped around her finger but took her wanting to hang out with my kids as a good sign.

●●●

NICOLE

I waved Baron good-bye while he wished me luck as I was making my way to the locker room I was sharing with John.

I still hadn't told Baron what had led to me sleeping in his room weeks before and he hadn't bothered asking. I knew he connected the dots after I couldn't stop myself from blurting it out when we sat with AJ. I mean I had no right to be angry about him doing whatever with Charlotte. But he was kissing me up against the wall one moment and sharing with Charlotte the next? I couldn't just not know what happened and he could have been lying but the meaning behind his words were for me. I hated how in that moment I wanted to smile and how guilty I felt when I realized John was there.

"You're only done now?" John's voice broke my thoughts and I realized the annoyed tone was directed at me. "We were supposed to have dinner here before your match an hour ago."

I nodded as it was the reason he had called me away from the guys to ask me what I wanted him to order.

"My match got moved back though. I'm sorry, love" I moved over to him but felt the tension in his body. I just assumed it had something to do with the match because he knew how easily time could fly when we were at work.

"Where were you?" He looked up at me as I stood between his legs.

"I texted you where I was" I frowned as I wasn't sure what was going on with him.

"So you spent half of the night giving Allen's kids a tour. We're in the same match he could have done it himself" He shook his head and while that was true I had fun hanging out with them and didn't really see it as a problem.

"You're acting like I was alone, and I didn't mind. They are great kids and Baron was with me." I shrugged not really wanting to argue over something so silly.

"Baron's with you a lot" he chuckled slightly but there was no amusement on his face.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Where did you spend the night when you said you were sharing with Renee cause Dean wasn't sharing with AJ."

"Are you accusing me of something?" I couldn't hold back the surprise in my voice especially due to him assuming something was happening between Baron and me.

"Where were you?" He repeated.

I sighed as there was no point in lying because he would be able to see it and it wasn't like I had done anything wrong with my friend. "I slept in Baron's room but that's all I did was sleep because I honestly didn't want to be alone with the man texting who knows who all night"

"What are you trying to say?" He frowned seeming confused by what I was hinting towards.

"That I saw the text on Christmas day, John. From 'S'. I saw it and since then I have been acting like I was okay when I was honestly not, not knowing who the man I loved was but you have been too busy to notice when normally you would have"

"That text is not what you think at all, Nicole"

"Really? Cause it seems like the man I love has been lying to me all this time" I shook my head feeling a weight leave me as I finally confronted him. But he didn't look guilty or frantic, he just seemed calm.

He sighed, "That text was from one of the writers on set who is very much a guy."

"That text didn't seem like it at all"

He chuckled, " I can imagine what you thought but it's how we are on set. Look"

I frowned as he showed me his phone and the rest of the messages with S. It was clear that he was indeed a man and I felt myself pale as I had been completely wrong.

"I thought..." I croaked and he immediately wrapped his arms around me.

"I would never ever hurt you like that" I heard his voice in my ear and I felt my face heat up as I was instantly overwhelmed by everything that had happened since I saw the text.

The stuff that had happened with AJ, the constant overthinking about where I had gone wrong for him to cheat on me. And now I knew exactly what was wrong in this very moment, I had cheated on John.

I had cheated on him with no reason.