Bold = Archer

Italics + Bold = Dustin (Archer's best friend and co-worker)

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"Okay, seriously. What is wrong with you, Archer? You've been a happy mess all day. It's disgusting."

"No, you're disgusting."

"And you're still smiling. So what happened?"

"Oh...nothing."

"Archer, you better tell me before I call your mom."

"Will you stop using my mom against me in every damn thing?"

"Nope. Marissa is awesome."

"Ugh."

"Wait...is it about Nora?"

"..."

"IT IS ABOUT NORA!"

"Shh! Don't talk about it out loud!"

"Why? You don't want anyone to know you loooooove her? Don't worry, your secret's safe with me."

"Yeah, right. You can't keep a secret if your life depended on it."

"Of course I can!"

"Oh really? Remember the time you told Anna I cheated off her test and she told Mrs.Danvers and I got suspended for a week? Or the time you told Scott that I broke his football helmet? Or the time you told my MOM that I broke her favorite mug? Or-"

"Okay, I get it!"

"Good. So now you can't tell anyone about this. Especially my mom. You know how she gets when I like a girl."

"...So you admit you like her?"

"..."

"YOU DO LIKE HER! YOU LIKE-"

"DUSTIN, SHUT THE FUCK UP!"